by Bonnie Leon
“Absolutely.” Hannah hefted the bag of gowns.
“I’ve books as well,” Mrs. Atherton said. “I’ll leave them here and you can share them.”
The women chatted excitedly while they sorted through the dresses and tried them on. There were exclamations of delight and even some prancing as they showed off their new gowns.
Mrs. Atherton walked among the women, asking questions about their health and their troubles. Some needed doctoring and she did what she could for them.
One woman had a terribly infected foot. There was little to be done, but Mrs. Atherton cleaned it and applied liniment and a bandage. “Make sure to change that every day and wash it.”
“We’re only allowed to bathe twice a year, mum.”
Mrs. Atherton looked at the man standing guard. She chewed her lip as she studied him. “I’ll ask if you can wash every day until it heals.”
“Thank ye, mum. Don’t know what I’d do without ye.”
Mrs. Atherton rested a hand on the woman’s arm. “I can do little. Lean on Jesus, dear. Find strength in him.”
“Yes, mum,” the woman said, sounding unconvinced.
Lydia walked toward Hannah. She hadn’t put on her dress.
“Why aren’t you wearing your new gown?”
“Figure I’ll wait until I bathe. Don’t want to ruin it.”
Suddenly Hannah was angry. It wasn’t right that someone like Lydia lived such a cruel existence. She studied her friend. She looked gaunt and weary. Quiet yourself. Being angry won’t help. She took a steadying breath and asked, “Have you been well?”
“I’m all right. I had the fever, but I’m better now.” Lydia sat on the bench beside Hannah. “Tell me ’bout life at the estate. Is it grand?”
“It’s good. The Athertons are kind and generous. John works there too.”
“John? Really?”
Hannah nodded. “He’s even more handsome cleaned up. And he’s a fine man.”
Lydia grinned. “Has he asked ye to marry him yet?”
“No. You know that can never be. If he knew . . .”
“It won’t matter to him, not if he loves ye.”
“I can’t tell him. And I won’t deceive him.” Hannah changed the subject. “There seems to be several new women. Any of the others come back?”
“There’s lots of new ladies. They come and go. The gents still show up lookin’ for wives.” She glanced at her dirty hands. “That man who took Rosalyn . . . he was back last week. Said he needed a new wife.”
“What happened to Rosalyn?”
“I guess she went with another man.” Lydia’s eyes turned hard. “So he killed her. He was braggin’ ’bout how he done it. Said he wanted the rest of us to know what we’d get if we dared look at another man.”
“Poor Rosalyn.” Hannah had known she’d end up badly. The blood thundered through her head. Things like this shouldn’t happen.
She couldn’t talk about it. She took Lydia’s hand. “I miss you. I think about you and pray you’ll find a better life.”
Lydia smiled. “Thank ye.”
“Are you really all right?”
Lydia averted her eyes, then looked at Hannah. “I need yer prayers. I’m not so strong anymore. It’s gettin’ harder to believe there’ll be something better. Months go by and I’m still ’ere, not knowing if I’ll ever get home. I think of me mum and wonder if she’s all right. I pray for her.”
In all the months at sea and the days in the gaol at Port Jackson, Hannah had never heard Lydia so disheartened. “I wish there was something I could do.” She pressed Lydia’s hands between hers. “I will pray.”
Lydia smiled softly. “This world comes with peril and hardships. The Lord says we’ll know tribulation. Figure there’s no reason I be spared.” She smiled.
Hannah shook her head. “It’s wrong that you’re here.”
“I hang on to my Savior.” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath and then said, “Even if his will is that I die, then I say yes, make it so.”
Hannah remembered Corliss from the ship and how she’d been ready for heaven, but this was different. This was Lydia. She looked her friend straight in the eye. “You can’t give up. You mustn’t. You’ve many years left to you. I know it.” She gripped Lydia’s shoulders. “Don’t surrender. Remember when you told me you wouldn’t die on that ship. If you let go now, those blokes from the ship, the soldiers at Port Jackson, and the guards here will win.”
“I know, but I’m tired.” Lydia stared at the floor, then looked at Hannah through tears. “Sometimes it’s hard to fight.”
The guard stepped into the workroom. “All right, back to work with you.”
His eyes went to Hannah. She could feel his loathing. He was the type who took pleasure in meting out pain. Why did God give him authority over these women? They didn’t deserve it. Especially Lydia. God, be merciful. Deliver her from this place. I beg you.
“I hope to see ye again,” Lydia said.
“You will. I’ll return. I promise.” Hannah rested her hands on her friend’s shoulders. “Don’t give up.”
Lydia nodded.
Hannah hugged her.
“On your way,” the guard shouted.
As the coach bounced over the rough road, Hannah’s mind remained at the factory. Even Mrs. Atherton was quiet and thoughtful.
Finally she asked, “Are you all right, Hannah? You’ve said almost nothing since we left.”
“I guess I don’t have anything to say.”
Mrs. Atherton reached across and rested a hand on Hannah’s. “It’s never easy to watch the suffering of others. But we must trust in the Lord. He has a way of working these things out.”
Hannah looked at Mrs. Atherton’s hands. Her touch was gentle and kind, yet Hannah dare not speak her mind.
“What is it, dear? Please, tell me.”
Hannah looked up at Mrs. Atherton. “I used to believe that, but I don’t anymore.”
“You don’t believe in God?”
“I believe in him, but I don’t see him as just. What I see in this world is the strong beating down the weak.” And God as a liar, she thought, knowing to speak of such a thing would be blasphemous. “My mum used to read the Scriptures to me. And she told me God is loving and kind, and that he watches over his children. But he doesn’t. Instead, he stands back and watches while they suffer and die.”
“Indeed, it does appear that way at times, but he isn’t the one who brings calamity. He created perfection for us. It was mankind who rejected his gift. We yearned for our own desires and did exactly what God told us not to do. Yet he still loves us, so much so that he sent his Son to redeem us.”
Mrs. Atherton settled back more comfortably in her seat. “It is evil in this world that kills and destroys. Not God. He offers us his presence and his peace. Even when we suffer we can trust in him. He sees it all and promises to reward those who endure.”
Hannah didn’t know how to respond. She’d heard similar words from her mother. After all that had happened to her and to those she loved, how could she believe in a benevolent God? What had he given her other than sorrow and heartache? She could hear Lydia’s reproof. “Ye’ve been given so much. Be thankful.” And she’s right, Hannah thought. When I look at how Lydia lives, I am truly blessed.
“I’ve been thinking,” Mrs. Atherton said, cutting into Hannah’s thoughts. “I need quite a bit of sewing done. Most of the gowns that have been donated for the women are gone. I’ll need more. You’re a fine seamstress. Perhaps you could make some for me?”
“I’d like that.”
“I’m also considering making some alterations in the house. I’ll need new draperies. Would you mind taking care of that for me as well?”
“Not at all, but what of my other duties?”
“You’ll need help, of course. Another housemaid could see to some of your present duties.” She folded her hands neatly in her lap. “Do you know anyone who would be right for the position?”
Her eyes gleamed with mischief.
Joy crept into the dark places inside Hannah. “What about Lydia?”
“The young woman you were speaking with today?”
“Yes. She’s a fine person. I’ve never seen anyone work as hard as she. And she’s absolutely honorable.”
Mrs. Atherton smiled. “You’re quite sure of this woman?”
“I am.”
“Well then, I shall have her transferred.”
Hannah brought her hands together. “You mean it?”
“Of course I do.” Mrs. Atherton smiled.
“Thank you, mum. You can’t imagine what this means to me and to Lydia.”
“I’m pleased to do it.” She glanced out the window. “Now then, we have someone to visit before we go home.”
The carriage turned onto an unfamiliar drive and stopped in front of a modest home. Chickens roamed about a small garden, pecking at the ground, and a cow stood in a corral chewing hay.
A woman stepped onto the front porch. She looked familiar.
“Mrs. Parnell!” Hannah exclaimed. A little girl wearing a green dress skipped onto the porch, her red ringlets bouncing. “Lottie?” Hannah could barely wait to get out of the carriage. Her eyes brimming with tears, she looked at Mrs. Atherton. “Thank you,” was all she could manage to say.
Mrs. Atherton patted her arm and with the driver’s assistance stepped out of the carriage. Hannah followed.
Mrs. Parnell approached them. “What a pleasant surprise.” She held out a hand to Mrs. Atherton.
Wearing a smile, Mrs. Atherton grasped her hand. “I hope it’s not an imposition. I made the decision to stop on impulse.” She turned to Hannah. “I’ve brought a guest.”
“Mum!” Lottie cried and ran to Hannah. Throwing her arms about Hannah’s waist she said, “I can’t believe it’s you.” She squeezed Hannah tightly and then stepped back. “Ye look so fine.”
Hannah felt as if her heart would burst with joy. She knelt in front of Lottie and, holding the little girl’s face in her hands, said, “You look wonderful too. I had no notion just how beautiful you are.” She hugged the little girl.
Mrs. Atherton turned to Hannah. “I thought that if it’s all right with Mrs. Parnell, perhaps you and Lottie could have a visit while we chat.”
“That’s a lovely idea.” Mrs. Parnell turned to Lottie. “Would you like that?”
“Yes, mum.”
“Well, then I’ll make us all some sandwiches. You and Hannah can have a picnic.”
Hannah and Lottie settled in a grassy spot beneath a tree. Lottie played hostess and offered Hannah half a chicken sandwich. “They’re very good. Me mum made them.”
Hearing Lottie refer to Mrs. Parnell as Mum reassured Hannah that she’d done the right thing by sending her to live with the Parnells. She accepted the sandwich. “It looks good.” Taking a bite, she said, “You seem happy, luv.”
“I am. It’s grand here. My new mum and dad are splendid people.” Her eyes lit on a nearby corral where a small brown pony stood munching hay. “I’ve a pony. His name is Champion.” She grinned.
“How wonderful. He looks like a fine pony too.”
“He is. We have great fun together.” Lottie bit into her sandwich. “Mum’s teaching me to read. I’m getting quite good. And I’m learning to cipher too.”
Still holding her sandwich, she let her hands rest in her lap. “I’ve missed ye. I wanted to go and see ye, but Port Jackson was too far, and when we found ye were at the factory, Mum said it wouldn’t be proper for me to go there.”
“I absolutely agree. It’s a horrible place, not suitable for fine young ladies.”
Hannah’s answer seemed to satisfy Lottie. “I’m so glad ye came to see me,” she said, leaning against Hannah.
The afternoon passed too quickly, and soon it was time for Hannah and Mrs. Atherton to leave. With hugs and promises of more visits, Hannah stepped into the carriage and settled on the seat opposite Mrs. Atherton.
“I’ll be at church next Sunday,” Lottie said. “Will ye be there?”
Hannah rested an arm on the window. “Absolutely. I wouldn’t miss. I’ve been hoping to see you there.”
“We were out of town and then I was ill,” Mrs. Parnell explained, “but we’ll be there this week, allowing there are no new difficulties.”
“I’ll look forward to seeing you,” Mrs. Atherton said.
When the carriage pulled away, Hannah waved at Lottie and then settled back in her seat. She felt content.
Was it possible that God had forgiven her? Thank you, Lord, for this day.
20
Hannah added a piece of cedar to the morning’s fire. “That ought to help ward off the chill.”
Lydia stood in front of the hearth. “I still can’t believe I’m here. I keep thinking I’m going to wake up from a dream.”
“It’s wonderful good fortune,” Hannah said, setting another chunk of wood in the flames. “I’m still stunned.” She smiled at Lydia. “It’s grand that we get to share the cottage.” She crossed the room, opened a bureau drawer, and took out a pair of stockings. “When we left London on that dreadful ship, I couldn’t imagine anything good would come of my future.”
“From the start I knew it would turn out well.” Lydia’s smile warmed the entire room.
“You never lost hope?” Hannah sat and pulled on her stockings.
“I knew God would see me through.” She compressed her lips. “That’s not completely true. I must admit that before Mrs. Atherton freed me from the factory, I was feeling rather low. Ye know that. Ye were there.” She smiled. “I don’t believe yer coming when ye did was an accident. It was the Lord.”
She reached for a gown hanging in the closet and held it against her. “But this . . . I couldn’t imagine—three dresses.”
She flashed Hannah a mischievous smile and whirled away from the closet, holding the dress in front of her. “And good shoes too. And undergarments.” She stopped her frolicking. “I’m grateful to ye and to Mrs. Atherton.”
“Mrs. Atherton knew we were good friends. She’s wonderfully kind. And it is true; I do need help. There’s so much to be done, especially now with the additional sewing.”
Lydia returned the dress to the closet and took out one made of green linen. “Did ye make this one?”
“I did.”
Lydia smoothed the material and pressed down the collar. “It must cost Mrs. Atherton a goodly amount—buying fabric for so many gowns. I can’t imagine.”
“Their business is prospering. They have two enterprises actually. Mr. Atherton sells tools, but most of the earnings come from timber. He ships logs and cut lumber, some of it out of the country. My understanding is that he was once quite adventurous, and I’d say he’s still rather daring.”
“He’s quite good-looking, for an elderly gent, that is.” Lydia grinned.
“He is, but I think it’s his heart that makes him so. He treats everyone kindly and fairly.” Hannah studied her friend. “You ought to wear the green for services this morning. It’s lovely with your eyes.”
“The one I have on is fetching too, don’t ye think?”
“It is.”
Lydia pressed a hand to her abdomen and took in a deep breath. “All of this and church too.” She shook her head. “I’m absolutely giddy.” She returned the gown to the closet. “Will John be going?”
“He rarely misses, especially since it’s required that prisoners attend.” Hannah sat on the bed. “From time to time Mr. Atherton sends him out of town, so of course he can’t make it then. But I’m sure I saw him about yesterday, so he ought to be joining us this morning.”
Hannah’s mind turned to John. Each morning he was her first thought and the last before falling asleep at night. During the day she often found herself seeking him out. Just being near him made her feel more content. Was it possible she was in love with him? No. I can’t be. And if I am, I simply won’t allow it.
Loving John would only br
ing about more sorrow. If he knew of her dishonor and her sin, he’d not spend another moment with her.
“Do ye think the two of ye will marry?” Lydia asked.
“I told you I couldn’t marry him.”
“He’s a fine gentleman and—”
“And I don’t want to speak of it.” Hannah stood. “We’ve little time before we have to leave. I’ll see if Mrs. Atherton needs me for anything before we go.”
“Hannah, I think ye ought to consider marriage.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Lydia nodded in resignation. “I’ll be praying about it, then.”
“Do as you see fit.”
Lydia smiled. “Is there anything I ought to be doing?”
“I don’t believe so. Mr. and Mrs. Atherton ride to church in the carriage. The servants use the wagon. The stable man will bring it to the back of the house when it’s time to go.” She glanced out the window. “I’m glad for good weather.” She moved to the door and stepped outside.
John and Perry were on the walkway and she nearly collided with them. Discomfited by John’s presence since she’d just been speaking about him, Hannah found it difficult to meet his eyes.
He smiled. “You’re in quite a hurry.”
“I was just on my way to see if Mrs. Atherton needs anything.”
“Are you all right?”
“Fine, thank you.” I can’t allow anything even slightly romantic, Hannah told herself, profoundly aware of John’s good looks.
“I heard Lydia’s been transferred from the factory and is working here. Is that true?”
“Yes. As a matter of fact, she’ll be going to church with us. She’s not quite ready yet.”
“I was just wanting to say hello, but we’ll wait and see her on the way, then.” He flashed Perry a knowing look.
“Are you two up to something?” Hannah asked.
“No. Why do you ask?”
Hannah glanced from John to Perry. Truth struck her. “You can’t seriously be thinking—”
