“Yeah, so I went and did the medical procedure for the baby. And then, you know I’d been scouted by a famous modeling agency but Mom and Dad had said no to me going to New York?”
He nodded.
“Well my biological dad owed me, and he paid for a place for me there. I told Mom I would run away if she didn’t give her permission, so she did,” Amelia said. “I was so freaked out, I couldn’t even stay in the same room as her, and every time I saw my dad I burst into tears. So, I drove to your place. I was going to ask you go come with me, but you told me about the college scouts coming to practice and I thought about your life with your brothers and Rose and I knew that you were meant to stay here.”
He understood that. He didn’t know what he would have done if she’d asked him to leave. He was glad he hadn’t had to make that decision. “There’s one thing I don’t understand. I asked you before but I don’t think you told me the real reason.”
“What’s that?” she asked.
“I get that you were leaving, but you’d been pretty adamant that we weren’t going to hook up. But then, that night…why did you want to?”
She took a deep breath but didn’t say anything for a long time.
“I wanted my first time to be with someone I cared about. Everything else in my world was changing and I wanted a little bit of you to take with me.”
Chapter Seven
She knew it hadn’t been fair to put that on him, but she wanted him to know that she hadn’t used him…well, that she hadn’t used him without a good reason. She had cared a lot for Cal as only a sixteen-year-old could, but she’d always been angry, stubborn and determined to make her own path.
He was watching her with an expression that she couldn’t read and maybe that was a good thing. Maybe it was better that she didn’t know what was on his mind. It wasn’t as if there was anything good he could say.
The swing stopped moving and she realized that she might have ruined any hope of a second chance with him by admitting the truth of her emotions back then, but because of what had happened with her parents, she couldn’t tolerate lying. Even when she knew it would be better to keep something to herself.
“So, yeah, I guess I should be going,” she said. He might need time to think about what she’d said or maybe he’d already decided that she wasn’t worth his time.
She started to stand up but he caught her hand, tugging her back down onto his lap. The swing bounced as she landed on him with more force than she’d expected.
“I can’t make up my mind if I’m flattered or not that you wanted your first time to be with me,” he said. “I mean, of course, you know that night was my first time, too. I thought—well it doesn’t matter. That night has always been tinged by the next morning. By you not coming to school and then learning from your sister that you’d left Last Stand.”
Shame over her actions rolled through her. She hadn’t meant to hurt him. The memory of Cal had been one of the best parts of her new life. Having him in her mind had soothed her when she’d been scared.
“I am sorry,” she said. “Sorrier than you will ever know. If I’d been older, I hope I would have reacted differently, maybe been smart enough not to sleep with you. Maybe I would have been able to consider the impact on you. But I didn’t. I was so hurt and scared and you were a comfort.”
“Comfort?” he asked. “That’s how you think of our night together.”
Their eyes met, and she saw the humor on his face. “Yeah. I mean, of course it was totally awesome too.”
“You’re making it worse,” he said, shifting her around so that her feet rested on the bench of the swing and she nestled in his arms against his chest.
“How can I make it up to you?” she asked. “I owe you.”
“You don’t owe me. That night was incredible,” he said. “We don’t owe each other anything.”
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“Yes, I am. At the time, I was pissed off but it’s been like what—thirteen years? I think I can let it go now,” he said.
“Thank you,” she said.
“So, what did your mom say to make you so mad?” he asked.
There was no way to explain her behavior of the last thirteen years without revealing how bratty she’d been. And truthfully, she wasn’t sure she wanted to talk about that time. Cal already had enough on his mind with his sister. Maybe she could help him. Maybe he needed something from her, the way she had needed him all those years ago.
“Nothing. She and Dad told me what had happened. I know I should probably refer to him as Jasper but I can’t. He’ll always be Dad to me.”
“That makes sense,” Cal said, pushing the swing in motion again. “He’s just a solid kind of guy. We sort of bonded after you’d left. I went to your house after school, but no one was home so I went to the bank… I was really worried that something had happened to you. Anyway, Jasper invited me into his office, said you’d gone to New York to model. That things had happened in your family that had upset you.
“I must have looked like I was confused and hurt because he told me that you were running from something that scared you. And he was sure you didn’t want to leave me.”
A wave of love for her dad went through her. “That’s so him. He’s just a nice guy. I mean I could see why Mom would want to be with him.”
“How did it happen?”
“Um, Mom had been to a Jax Williams concert two days before her first date with Dad. Memaw had conspired with Granny Nadine to set them up on a date, but Mom said they were both so different that neither expected anything to come of it. Jax had been performing in Luckenbach and it was a small and close setting. They met, and she said…he had a certain charm. One thing led to another and they hooked up. She said that it hadn’t been love, just a one-night thing.”
He rubbed his hands up and down her arms. She realized as she was talking just how much of her past she still resented. “That almost makes it worse in a way. I mean I am the product of a hookup.”
He tipped her chin back and their eyes met. “You aren’t. Jasper Corbyn and your mom wanted you. They made a family around you and I think that’s pretty special.”
His spin on her past made her feel special, though she knew she wasn’t. But she realized that Cal had a gift for taking the ordinary and making it seem…like magic.
She didn’t want to talk about her past anymore or think about it. She was in Cal’s arms—the one place she’d never thought she’d be again. And tonight, it felt like it was just the two of them and the big Texas sky. That nothing else existed. Not the pain that had plagued both of them over the past thirteen years, not the horrible tragedy that had occurred just yesterday. Tonight was all about the two of them and the lusty attraction that time hadn’t dulled.
She put her hands on either side of his jaw, feeling the abrasiveness of his stubble against her palms as she drew his head down toward hers. Their lips met and she knew that it hadn’t been a fluke earlier in Memaw’s garden. The passion was still there.
*
Holding Amelia in his arms made the grief inside him almost tolerable. For a few minutes, it wasn’t consuming him. And he was willing to do whatever he had to in order to keep it at bay. The things she’d told him about her past made his heart ache for the young girl she’d been.
While she hadn’t been perfect, she had been special. He knew how much being a Corbyn girl had meant to her. And while to him she’d always be one, he could see how it was different for her.
But that wasn’t why he kept kissing her. He wanted everything she had to give him. He wanted to make love to her again so that he could prove to himself it hadn’t been just a fluke. And so he could forget everything else. Amelia had always sort of consumed him.
That hadn’t changed in thirteen years.
He lifted his head and looked down at her face. Her eyes were closed, her cheeks in the flickering lamplight were flushed, her lips wet from their kiss and slightly swollen. Cupping the back of
her neck, he rubbed his finger up and down the column of her neck until her eyes opened. Their gazes met, and he felt something primal spring to life inside of him. The calmness he’d been carefully cultivating since he’d sat next to her on the swing was gone.
He didn’t like the way it swamped him or how out of control he felt.
She touched her finger to his lips and he groaned. He couldn’t help it. He was on the edge and everything she did further enflamed him. He wasn’t going to be able to walk away.
“Do you want me?” he asked, carefully. “We hardly know each other now.”
“That doesn’t matter. I feel like I’ve always known you, Cal. I do want you,” she said. “But I know the timing isn’t right.”
“When is it going to be right?” he asked. “One thing Rose’s accident—” He stopped speaking as his voice cracked.
She pulled him into her arms. “What can I do? I know that there is nothing to stop you from thinking about her. Do you want to talk about her?”
“Talking…I don’t think I can,” he said, his voice breaking. “I keep expecting her to walk back in the door. Even Braden can’t stand to be around right now. Yet it’s Lane’s home.”
She held him close to her, moving around until they were lying next to each other. He didn’t know how to ask for comfort. Wasn’t even sure he deserved it. But she seemed to understand.
She leaned up to kiss him. He guessed she meant to offer him some comfort, but he needed something more. He deepened the kiss, his tongue brushing over hers as he skimmed his hands over her back, rolling so that she was on top of him. As she settled over his hips, his erection stirred and grew beneath her.
He knew he should walk away. He wasn’t really in any position to be making love to Amelia—not now—but she framed his face with her hands again, and he realized how much he liked it when she touched him. She rested her forehead against his and he felt the brush of her long hair against his shoulder.
He caught her wrists in his hands and drew them back behind her, so that her spine arched, and her breasts were thrust toward him. Her long hair fell forward, curling over the top of her right breast. Her ebony-colored hair contrasted with the paleness of her skin, as he slowly removed her blouse and bra.
When he’d finished, she tugged her wrists free and reached for his shirt buttons. Blood rushed through his veins, pooling in his groin and hardening him even more as she slowly unbuttoned his shirt. Her fingers were cool against his skin as she worked her way down his body. When she finished, she pushed it open, scraping her nails down his chest and squeezing his pecs.
He shrugged out of his shirt and tossed it aside. He growled deep in his throat as he felt her breath against his chest and then the brush of her lips. Nibbling her way from one collarbone to the other, he felt the edge of her teeth as she grazed his skin.
He watched her kissing him, touching him, and got even harder in his jeans, which were getting to be too tight. Her tongue darted out and brushed against his nipple. His hips jerked forward as he put his hand on the back of her head, urging her to continue kissing him.
“Where did you get this?” she asked, her tongue tracing over the scar tissue on his left shoulder. He normally wasn’t much of a talker during sex, but he would do anything to make this last longer. Draw it out so he didn’t get sucked back into the real world.
“That’s where I had my surgery after I got sacked. The defensive lineman caught me midthrow and it wrenched my shoulder out of its socket. It took several surgeries to regain flexibility in it.”
“God, that must have been really painful,” she said. She had one hand braced on his chest as she leaned over him.
He shifted under her and lifted her in his arms so that she straddled him. He leaned up and kissed her lips. “At the time, I was more concerned about not being able to play anymore. But it did hurt, and physical therapy was a bitch too.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, rubbing her fingers lightly over the scar and then kissing it.
He rubbed his hands over the length of her naked back, enjoying the feel of Amelia in his arms. And as desperate as he was to be inside of her, this was nice too.
She put her hands on his shoulders and eased her way down his chest. Moving as if they had all night, she traced each of the muscles that ribbed his abdomen. He’d continued working out even though his playing days were over. He found that physical activity took the edge off his restlessness most days and he was glad now that he had.
She was enjoying his body and that made his chest swell and his shoulders sit a bit straighter. As she moved lower, her fingers feathering down toward the button fly of his jeans, he stopped breathing. He felt his heartbeat in his erection where it was pressed against the fly of his jeans. As she reached the edge of his pants, she stopped and glanced up his body to his face.
He nodded and sort of grunted. Words beyond him at the moment. She just smiled, which made him groan again, her hand going to his erection, brushing over his straining length.
He lifted her slightly so that her nipples brushed his chest.
She nibbled on her lips as he rotated his shoulders so that his chest rubbed against her breasts. His blood roared in his ears and he couldn’t see anything but her naked in his arms. But they both still wore their jeans and he was so hard, so full right now that he needed to be inside of her body.
Impatient with her clothes, he stood up and set her on her feet as he undid her jeans and then shoved them down her legs.
She laughed and stepped out of the flip-flops she’d worn on her feet and then out of her jeans. He caressed her long, lean thighs. God, she was soft. She moaned as he neared her center and then sighed when he brushed his fingertips across the crotch of her panties.
The lace was warm and wet. He slipped one finger under the material and hesitated for a second, looking up into her electric-blue eyes.
She bit down on her lower lip and he felt the minute movements of her hips as she tried to move his touch where she needed it. Pushing the fabric of her panties aside, he delicately outlined the opening of her body. She was warm and wet and so ready for him. It was only the fact that he wanted her to climax at least once before he took her that enabled him to keep his own needs in check.
She shifted against him and he entered her body with just the tip of one finger. He teased them both with a few short thrusts.
“Cal…” she said, her voice breathless and airy.
“Yes, darlin’?”
“I need more than you teasing me.”
He pushed his finger further up into her body. “How’s this?”
“Good,” she moaned as her hips rocked against his finger for a few strokes.
He removed his finger and traced it around her clit. She bit her lower lip and let her head fall back as she drove her hips frantically against him.
He undid his own jeans and freed his cock before lifting her off her feet and sitting back down on the swing. Straddling him again, he felt the brush of his naked cock against her warm center and he cursed.
“I don’t have a condom,” he said, between gritted teeth.
“I’m on the pill,” she said. “And healthy.”
“Hell, yeah.”
She kissed him, thrusting her tongue deep into his mouth as she leaned forward, bracing her hands on his shoulders. Her breasts brushed his chest, her nipples now tight little nubs.
He lowered his head, taking her beaded nipple into his mouth and suckling her deeply. As he traced his fingers down the side of her body, he nipped at her waist and then moved his hand lower, to her pussy. He plunged two fingers into her body. He kept his thumb on her clit as he worked his fingers deep inside her, and within minutes, she threw her head back and called his name.
He felt the tightening of her body against his fingers. She kept rocking against him for a few more minutes and then collapsed against him. She turned her head until their mouths met and tangled her hands in the back of his hair. Her nails dug into his shoulders and s
he leaned up, brushing against his chest. Her nipples were hard points and he pulled away from her mouth, glancing down to see them pushing against his chest.
He caressed her back and spine, scraping his nail down the length of it. He followed the line of her back down the indentation above her backside. She closed her eyes and held her breath as he fondled her. It was velvety compared to the satin smoothness of her breast. He brushed his finger back and forth until she bit her lower lip and shifted on his lap.
She moaned a sweet sound that he leaned up to capture in his mouth. She tipped her head to the side immediately allowing him access to her mouth. She held his shoulders and moved on him, centering herself over his erection.
She called his name as he brushed his cock against her humid center, straddling him so that just the tip of his erection was inside of her.
He scraped his fingernail over her nipple and she shivered in his arms. He pushed her back a little bit, so he could see her.
He held her still with a hand on the small of her back. He buried his other hand in her hair and arched her over his arm. He wanted Amelia more than he’d wanted a woman in a long time. He knew better than to let this mean anything more than one night with his ex. He wouldn’t let this be about anything other than the physical.
She rocked her hips trying to take him deeper and he knew the time for teasing was at an end.
She leaned down and sucked his lower lip into her mouth, biting gently. He wanted to make her his, even as he knew no woman could ever be his. But in this moment, with the big Texas sky over them filled with stars, he could pretend.
He could claim Amelia as his…
Just for tonight.
She wasn’t looking for anything permanent and Lord knew, he was a Delaney through and through, cursed to never keep a woman. He shoved that thought aside, giving her another inch of his cock, thrusting his hips up into her tight pussy. Her eyes were heavy-lidded as her hips moved frantically against him.
Her Texas Ex (The Dangerous Delaneys Book 1) Page 7
