“That’s okay, sweetie. We need to cut loose every once in a while.” She kissed his wet forehead. “Now go dry off and change up so we can go shopping for…for…gosh, what were we going shopping for?”
“Mom, it would be so easy to grab that hose again.” Kam disappeared down the hallway.
Johanna picked up the French toast platter and held it up to Holden. “Quite the white knight, aren’t you?”
“I had to improvise. I left my armor and sword in Texas.” He shrugged and wiped his face with a towel. He ran his hand through this hair again, wincing a little when his fingers reached the stitches on the crown of his head.
“Well, I thank you. And for more than defending me.”
Holden gave her a small bow and stepped closer. Her breath got caught in her lungs when he rested his hands on her upper arms.
“Any time, my damsel.” His gaze combed over her. “And now I must insist you dry off and change as well, because I can’t be held responsible for the actions that wet T-shirt is about to cause.” He coiled a damp tendril of her hair around his finger, then released it. “Meet you in this exact spot in ten minutes?”
She nodded, not able to find her voice. Holden let his hands slide down her arms, and she was sure she would melt to yet another puddle on this kitchen floor. He hesitated at her wrists, a contemplative crease in his brows, then let go of her.
“It’s getting to the point where I don’t care about my past,” he said as he paused at the kitchen doorway. “Which is crazy, but I’m liking right now and am curious about what comes next.”
He left her with a smile, one that promised things. One that made that fire inside her burn a little brighter.
****
Sitting next to Johanna in the Bronco, Holden watched the scenery go by. Farms, barns, cows, horses, tractors, green fields, blue sky, golden sun. Nebraska sure was pretty.
He slid a glance toward Johanna in her green Hasard’s Farm Equipment T-shirt. The people in Nebraska were something to look at too. At least this one beside him was. The wet T-shirt from this morning’s water fight—one proclaiming Settier’s Apple Orchard to be The Promised Land of Homemade Pies—had revealed a few things about Johanna Ware. Things Holden wanted to inspect more closely.
The scary thing was he’d meant what he’d said to her in the kitchen, that he was thinking more about right now and the future instead of his past. Perhaps he had forgotten his past because it wasn’t worth remembering. What if being here with Johanna and Kam was what really mattered?
Before they’d left to go shopping, he’d done a walk-through of the property, checking the house, barn, and tractor shed for any signs of major damage from the tornado. Other than a few missing shingles which he could easily fix, nothing seemed worse for the wear. He caught himself a few times imagining the property was his. Foolish, but he felt comfortable there.
“Should I go with the superheroes theme or the monster trucks theme?” Kam asked from the backseat.
Holden angled to look back at him. Kam had a pair of sunglasses on and a handheld video game in his lap. His brown T-shirt had a big yellow leaf in the center with the words Cabaston’s Landscaping, Leaf It to Us around the leaf. Another one of Johanna’s creations.
“Which one do you like more? Superheroes or monster trucks?” Johanna asked.
“That’s just it. I can’t decide.” Kam flopped his hands out to his sides.
“Holden, looks like it’s up to you to break the tie.” Johanna shot him a quick glance then put her focus back on the road.
“Monster trucks are like racecars so I’m going to vote for them.”
Kam nodded. “Maybe we can make a model monster truck out of—”
“Legos,” Johanna and Holden said together.
“Do you have any paper, Mom?” Kam searched in the pocket on the back of the driver’s seat.
“In here.” Johanna hoisted her purse back to Kam and the boy dove into it. After a few moments of rummaging around and stealing a stick of gum, he held up a pad and a pen. He pushed the purse to the seat beside him and, with his jaw chomping on the gum, he sketched a monster truck design.
“That’ll keep him busy for a few,” Johanna whispered, a grin dimpling her right cheek.
Holden faced front again to avoid examining that dimple with his fingertip. “Exactly how busy?”
She glanced his way again, an arch to her eyebrow. “Busy like we don’t exist up here in the front seats.”
Tempting. Very tempting. Especially the way her lips curled up in a sly little grin.
Get control, man. Focus on the road. And he did. He nearly burned a hole in the windshield concentrating on the highway onto which Johanna had merged. He only looked away when her slender fingers reached forward and turned on the radio. A guitar-heavy rhythm and blues piece filtered from the speakers and Holden relaxed. A little. He drummed his fingers on his knee as he listened.
“You like this music?” Johanna asked.
“Yeah. I always wished I could play the guitar.” The words slipped from his mouth, then he whipped his head toward Johanna. “You did it again!”
“Did what?”
“Made me remember something about myself.”
She pointed her thumb at herself. “Better than any medicine right here, baby.”
Baby? He loved the sound of that word coming from her and directed at him. He could get used to being called baby. Her baby. He had a few names in mind for her as well.
“I’ll be needing several doses of you throughout the day then.”
“Aye, aye.” She gave him a nod and switched lanes to move around a tractor-trailer. “Generally, I hate those things.” She gestured to the truck and attempted to pass it. The Bronco protested at the change of speed, but chugged along. “The graphic on it, however, is my design and looks pretty sweet that large.”
Holden looked out his window. An eagle with a package gripped tightly in its talons stretched across the side of the tractor-trailer. The words Eagle Express were written in a golden color below the bird.
“Nice. There’s a lot of detail on those feathers.”
“It’s the details that keep the clients happy.” She took the next exit and rolled to a stop at the end of it.
“How long have you been doing graphic design?” Talking about her work was a safe topic. Not one likely to arouse him he hoped.
“About twelve years. I started right out of college with an advertising company, but didn’t like the corporate scene. After Alex and I got married and we had Kam and…” Her voice broke for a nanosecond. “Once we had Kam, I branched out on my own and worked from home. It was great because I could set my own hours, be with Kam, have dinner on the table. You know, be a career woman and a mother.”
“Sounds like the perfect plan.” Holden noted she hadn’t mentioned Kallie. He couldn’t imagine the hurt losing a child caused, especially losing one the way Kam had explained.
“It was a perfect plan. For a little while anyway.” She sifted out a sigh and pulled into a parking space at the lumberyard. “But even the best plans get fucked up sometimes.” She whispered the curse, then put on a smile as she looked at Kam. “Least I got him out of the deal.”
Kam was still drawing his monster truck design, his grip so tight on the pen that his fingers were turning red. Having a kid like him was a good deal. Again, Holden wondered if there were kids waiting somewhere in Texas for him. He waited for a recovered memory of throwing a baseball around or teaching someone to ride a bike to come flooding back to him, but nothing did.
He turned toward the lumberyard. “Why don’t you drop me off here and go get your party supplies? This will take me a little while.” And he needed some space from these too-good-to-be-true people.
“Okay.” She tapped the dashboard clock. “An hour enough time?”
“Perfect.” He hopped out of the Bronco.
“Then we’ll outfit you with some new clothes.” She gave him a once over as he stood outside by the
open passenger door. “I’m thinking a velvet sweat suit would be absolutely perfect on you.”
Kam let out a laugh from the backseat. “Good one, Mom.”
Holden poked his head back into the Bronco so he could see Kam. “She’s not allowed to pick out any clothes for me.”
“What about a nice pair of cowboy boots?” Johanna asked. “You’re supposedly from Texas.”
He looked down to Alex’s workboots. “Nope. I think these are along the right lines. T-shirts and jeans too, just new ones.”
Johanna studied him again, and it worried Holden that he liked when she did that.
****
“I like him,” Kam said as the Bronco pulled out of the lumberyard lot.
Johanna looked at Kam in the rearview mirror. “Me too.” She purposely kept her voice casual.
Kam’s gaze met hers in the mirror, a slight curve to his lips. “How much do you like him?”
“Probably not as much as you like Christina Darren.” She stuck her tongue out at Kam, and he rolled his eyes.
“Does he make your hands sweat?”
A very good question. Holden certainly raised her body temperature. Dropping him off at the lumberyard had caused all sorts of sawdusted fantasies to sprout in her mind. Something so terrifically male about a guy who knew his way around a toolbox and a pile of wood.
“So? Does he?” Kam poked his head between the front seats as Johanna pulled into a spot in front of the party supply store.
She shut off the Bronco and held up her hands. “No sweat here.”
Kam looked at her for a long moment. He did that whenever he didn’t believe what she was telling him. She braced for further questioning, but he just patted her shoulder as if she were a small child and climbed out of the car.
“Christina Darren hasn’t replied to my invitation yet.” Kam pulled open the store’s door and held it for Johanna like a true gentleman. There was an old soul behind those grass-stained jean shorts and untied sneakers.
“Maybe she’s afraid there’ll only be boys at your party.”
“I wrote that my three girl cousins would be there on the invitation.” Leave it to Kam to think of everything.
“Maybe she’s going away on vacation on the party date.” Johanna wanted that disappointed look in Kam’s big eyes to scram.
Kam shook his head. “Nope. Bobby Reshetti said she’s going to Disney World in August.”
“Well, there’s still time for her to respond. Don’t give up yet.” She ruffled his hair and led him to the monster truck aisle where four other mom-and-son pairs stood piling goods into carriages. “Guess Holden knows what boys like, huh?”
Kam ran towards the plates, cups, and tablecloths all emblazoned with big-tired monster trucks. He started talking to some of the other boys in the aisle as they all pulled down small plastic trucks and party hats. The other mothers made room for Johanna in the aisle.
“Popular theme this year,” one of the mothers said.
“Looks like it.” Johanna kept an eye on Kam as he reached for the plates shaped like huge tires. He wiggled himself free of the other boys, then stopped short at the next display.
“Hey, Mom,” he said. “This one is all racecars.” He put down the tire plates.
Johanna stood behind him, away from the other shoppers, and scanned the display. Black and white checkered napkins complemented a set of plates shaped like steering wheels, and plastic racecars with zip cords were available in red, blue, green, and neon yellow.
“Holden would like this better than monster trucks.” Kam looked back to the monster truck display where two of the other boys were now wrestling with a plastic, gasoline can-shaped punch bowl.
“Do you like this one better?” She turned him to face her.
A slow smile creased his adorable face. “Yeah, let’s get the racecar stuff, and not tell Holden. It’ll be a surprise on the day of the party.” He started piling supplies into the carriage Johanna had left at the end of the aisle.
She should have mentioned to Kam that Holden might not be around for his birthday party. He could easily have regained his memory by then and be settled back in Texas, living the life he was supposed to be living. She should have warned her dear child not to get attached to Holden, because he wasn’t theirs to keep.
“You’re sure about this theme change, Kam?” she asked.
“Yup.” He tossed a blackish-gray tablecloth with a dotted white line down the center of it into the carriage. “There’s not much difference between the two anyway.”
Ever practical Kam. Johanna helped him reach the red, white, and black streamers, and before she knew it, she was handing her credit card over to the teenage cashier. After they packed their purchases into the Bronco, Johanna checked her watch.
“Well, that only took twenty minutes, buddy.” She unlocked the back door, and Kam climbed in.
“Let’s go back to the lumberyard and find Holden. Maybe he needs help.” He buckled his seatbelt and picked up his video game.
Johanna slid into the driver’s seat and hunted for a way to object to going to the lumberyard. She couldn’t find one. She wanted to go to the lumberyard, to Holden.
Sighing at her stupidity, she jammed the key into the ignition and headed out of the parking lot.
“Your hands are sweaty, aren’t they?” Kam giggled softly.
“Shush.” Johanna turned up the radio and ignored the astute observations of her child.
When the Bronco rolled to a stop again in the lumberyard parking lot, she reminded herself this wasn’t normal. Being interested in a man she’d just met who had amnesia and defended her with a French toast platter was craziness. She and Kam had done all right on their own this far. She had focused on working and raising her son and she’d get back into that mode. Soon. Today, in fact. Once she got home, she’d spend the rest of the afternoon locked in her office and buried in her work.
Having made that plan, Johanna hauled herself out of the Bronco and walked with Kam to the front doors of the lumberyard. The smell of cut wood tickled her nose, and she closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. When she opened her eyes, Holden was in the doorway in front of her holding a shopping bag.
He looked at his wrist, which didn’t have a watch on it, and asked, “Has it been an hour already?”
Oh, it’s been way longer than an hour, her girl parts said.
Be quiet, Johanna thought, though her body felt a magnetic pull toward Holden.
“No, we finished up quick in the party supply store,” Kam answered. “And you’re not allowed to see what we bought.” He hopped on one foot then the other.
“Okay.” Holden looked at Johanna and pretended to whisper to her. “Someone is a little excited, yes?”
Yes! the girl parts cheered.
Johanna mentally hushed them. “Hey, you don’t turn ten everyday, you know.”
“That’s true.”
“What did you do on your tenth birthday?” she asked quickly, in a half-hearted attempt to jog his memory.
Holden crunched his eyebrows together, then shook his head. “I got nothing. Thanks for trying though.”
“We’ll keep at it.” She arrowed her hand to Reggie’s across the street. “Next stop?”
“Yeah. The lumberyard will deliver the bigger supplies.” He wiggled the shopping bag and followed Kam back to the Bronco.
Johanna walked a few steps behind them and wiped the sweat from her palms.
Chapter Nine
“Mom, I’m hungry,” Kam said after they’d finished at the building supply store and picking out clothes for Holden. Bags full of party supplies, nails, screws, T-shirts, jeans, socks, boxer shorts, and workboots spilled from the back of the Bronco onto the seat beside Kam.
Holden had managed to escape without a velvet sweat suit much to his relief. Not that Kam and Johanna hadn’t made him try one on just for laughs, however. Puce was so not his color, by the way. Even he had to laugh at how ridiculous he looked in the suit. He’d been
pretty sure he’d have to carry Kam and Johanna out of the clothing store because they were busting a gut over him in that ensemble.
Truthfully, he’d had a goddamned blast trying that sweat suit on and amusing them. Kam and Johanna were amazing. When they laughed, they were perfect.
“I’m hungry too,” Holden said.
“Great,” Johanna said. “Now there are two of you to deal with.” She rolled her eyes, but her lips twitched up at the corner. “I suppose it is past lunchtime.”
“Almost ten-year old boys need sustenance.” Holden winked at Kam.
“Yeah, I’ll never grow if you don’t feed me.” Kam put on an impressive sad face.
Johanna straightened up in her seat to look at Kam in the rearview mirror. “I feed you. I feed you very well, kid.”
Kam shrugged and looked at Holden. “She’s right. She does.”
“Thank you.” Johanna bowed her head. “And because of your honesty, Kam, we’ll go have some lunch.”
“If he wasn’t honest, were you going to starve him? And me?” Holden asked.
“I might still starve you.” Johanna shot him a quick look as she pulled into a nearby restaurant.
“That’s evil.” He narrowed his eyes at her, and she gave him an Oh well look.
They got out of the Bronco and a hostess held open the front door of a restaurant called The Corn Cob.
“Tell me they serve more than corn here,” Holden said to Kam.
After a giggle, Kam said, “They have sandwiches and burgers. Stuff like that.”
“And ice cream?” Holden followed the hostess to a booth toward the back of the restaurant.
“Definitely ice cream.” Kam scooted across one seat and Johanna followed him, so Holden took the other seat across from them.
“How is everybody today?” the waitress asked. “In the mood for a nice family lunch?”
No one corrected her.
She left the menus after rattling off a list of specials, which Holden didn’t pay attention to. He was too busy watching the way red curls fell about Johanna’s face as she perused her own menu.
“Don’t order anything with nuts,” she said. “Just in case.”
Kisses to Remember Page 13
