by Leigh Landry
Besides, Lauren didn’t need him sniffing around her while she was still grieving. When they were both grieving.
But the fact remained that he didn’t feel any better after dropping off that box. He wasn’t sure what, if anything, could give him the closure he needed.
He thought about Lauren in that house all weekend, stuck with going through her sister’s things alone. It broke his heart. He knew how close they’d been, even though they hadn’t seen much of each other the past few years.
He stared at his phone on the end table beside him. He knew what he needed to do. What the right thing to do was.
Plus, he did need the closure. Even if that meant denying his feelings for Lauren in person, one more time.
Chapter 2
The store was busier than usual when Lauren clocked in early Friday afternoon. Low but lively zydeco music filled the warehouse-style building, bouncing off the metal walls and dancing through the air above the T-shirt racks. Shelves filled with posters, bumper stickers, and postcards all displayed regional phrases—like “lâche pas la patate” and “cher bébé”—and graphics created by local artists and designers.
“Hey, Sugar Bee.”
Her boss, Robin, finished up a conversation with the owner of the coffee shop next door and waved Lauren over. She wore a big smile with a dark, wavy bob framing her round face. Her broad shoulders stretched the knit of the navy T-shirt with the state of Louisiana print that was one of the store’s best sellers.
Lauren and Robin both grew up in the Cajun music scene, and Robin had been calling her “Sugar Bee” for as long as Lauren could remember. Not because she was almost ten years older than Lauren or because they had some special bond, but because that’s just how it was. Robin was sort of the mama bird in every setting, flinging around hugs, terms of endearment, and a sharp knife to defend you if you ever needed it.
“We’re rockin’ in here this afternoon,” said Robin. “Hope you’re awake and ready to go!”
“Sure. What’s with all the customers?”
There was always a festival for something nearby, but for once Lauren couldn’t think of anything happening in town that weekend that might bring in an extra rush of tourists. Whatever it was, it was a welcome distraction.
She’d been thinking about Tyler standing in her doorway for the past hour and wondering if he was really going to find anything else to drop off. Daydreaming about him was fine. Great. But thoughts of Tyler inevitably led to thoughts of Brandy. Which was less great.
Not to mention she was only a few weeks out of a shitty relationship. One that had drained six months of her life and sent her crawling home to live with her parents again. Kind of hard to stick around when you walk in on your boyfriend and roommate screwing on the living room carpet with Survivor still on the TV. Because it wasn’t enough for them to betray her. They had to ruin her favorite show, too.
“Some educator convention at the hotel down the road,” Robin said. “We got a rush when they all walked over next door for some afternoon coffee between workshops or seminars or whatever.”
“Selling well so far?”
“Eh.” Robin scrunched her face and made a wobbly hand motion. “Teachers. Not a ton of disposable tourist cash, know what I mean? But business is business, so I’m not complaining!”
Lauren smiled. She loved working for Robin. Not just because she ran a great business and treated her employees respectfully, almost like family, but also because her relaxed enthusiasm was contagious. Whenever she was around, Lauren couldn’t help feeling that, no matter what, things were going to be okay.
“All right, enough chitter-chatter. Let’s move some shit.”
“Ma’am, yes, ma’am,” Lauren barked back with a grin.
Robin chuckled and patted the register counter as she walked toward the back of the shop.
The next couple of hours flew by thanks to a steady stream of customers. Lauren hardly had any time to think about Brandy or Tyler or the mess her life had spiraled into.
She couldn’t live with her parents forever. Well, she could, but she couldn’t imagine she’d live very long with her mom nagging her about going back to school or getting a “real” job or trying to set her up with some friend’s son. And there was no way in hell she was going to move back to her old place. Not that her former best friend had even bothered to apologize or explain or ask Lauren to stay.
As for that rat-bag of an ex-boyfriend...well, she wasn’t wasting another second on him. Now that she had some distance, she could admit their relationship was a mess long before she walked out.
He had a nasty habit of always trying to push her. Not necessarily to be better or braver, but to be who he wanted her to be—to listen to his music, go to the bars he liked, watch his shows. He never once agreed to what she wanted to do or to try anything new with her. It was always Lauren who needed to expand her horizons or whatever manipulative bullshit line of the day he used on her.
“Sugar Bee!”
Lauren heard Robin shouting from the back of the room. She glanced over to make sure her coworker was still up front to watch the register, then headed toward the back, past the racks to the printing area.
“You need something?” Lauren asked.
“Yeah.” Robin finished typing and tucked her phone in her back jeans pocket. “You still play, right?”
“Play?”
“Fiddle.” Robin looked at Lauren expectantly, while Lauren debated her answer.
“Yeah. Some.”
“Awesome. You’re not playing with anyone right now, right? Like, not regularly?”
Lauren’s family—her, her mom, sister, aunt, and a cousin—played small, family-friendly gigs around town when she was a kid. Their little family band dismantled once the kids all became busy teenagers. A few years later, Brandy joined the army and Lauren went to college to study classical violin and music composition.
“Uh, no.”
Lauren left out the part where holding Brandy’s fiddle that morning was the last time she had even picked up an instrument this whole year. Her violin had been propped on her bedroom dresser since she’d dropped out of school—for the second time—last fall.
“Want to?” Robin asked.
“Want to what?”
“Play. With us.”
“Us?”
“My band.”
“Oh. Are you looking to add a second fiddle?” Some Cajun bands still use a twin-fiddling style, where one fiddle plays the melody and another plays rhythmic accompaniment, or where the two fiddles play off of each other and trade off the melody, which was how Lauren and her sister had played. It was fun and lively, but Robin’s band always had just the one, because Robin led with the accordion. Lauren didn’t see why they would change that now. Not when they were pretty well established and had two albums out and everyone knew their style and sound.
“No.” Robin frowned. “Camille is…out. For a while.”
“Oh. So you need a sub?”
“Kind of. Maybe longer.”
Lauren didn’t know Camille, and she didn’t really know anything about the band’s dynamic, but she knew Robin and Camille had been playing together for so long that this didn’t make a whole lot of sense.
“For how long?” she asked.
“A couple months. At least. Maybe permanent.” Robin saw the hesitation on Lauren’s face and added, “We can probably find someone permanent later if we need to. We just don’t want to have to cancel some of our commitments in the meantime. Our schedule is actually pretty light the next couple of months until festival season kicks up in the spring.”
Lauren knew she should say no. Sure, she could play. Even not having touched her violin in months, she could pick it up and play an etude right now if she had to. It might be a little shaky, but she could get through it well enough to impress most people.
But Robin was asking for a whole different thing.
Lauren hadn’t played this kind of music with her sister or mom or a
nyone else in years. Even if she had been playing regularly, she didn’t know this group’s songs. She’d gone to watch Robin and her band perform a few times, but they played originals. Lauren couldn’t just pick up and fiddle along by ear. Maybe when she was twelve and fooling around and no one was expecting anything.
But this? No way.
“You know I won’t take a gig playing for just free beer and tips, so I promise it pays well,” Robin said. “Sound good?”
No matter how badly Lauren wanted some extra cash for a deposit on a new place of her own or how much she wanted to play again or even how much she wanted to feel like she belonged in a group like that again, she knew what her answer had to be.
Too bad she couldn’t make herself say it.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Sweet!” Robin pulled out her phone. “You are a lifesaver. We really didn’t want to have to cancel those gigs.” Her thumbs tapped away on her phone. “You free later this weekend?”
Robin’s employees all took turns working Saturdays and Sundays, so they each had one full weekend off every month. Unfortunately, last month’s was spent mourning and moving, and this month’s was an extension of that.
“Yeah, I’m just going through Brandy’s things at my parents’ house.”
Robin looked up from the phone and froze. “Shit. That sucks. Sorry, I should have asked first how you were doing.”
Lauren shrugged. “Someone’s gotta do it.”
“Well, you got plans Saturday night? Want to come jam with us at my house? Take a break from that?”
Lauren hesitated for a second, but not long enough for her brain to do the sane, logical thing and back out of this while she still could.
“Sure.”
“Good.” Robin typed on her phone and frowned. She rolled her eyes at the phone, then put it in her back pocket. “But I have to warn you. This is sort of an impromptu audition.”
“That makes sense.” Lauren had been on enough auditions in her life that they didn’t really scare her anymore. Only the fact that she had no idea what she was doing this time scared the crap out of her. As it should.
“Really, you just have to get past Natalie.”
“Natalie?”
“Our guitar player. Camille’s her best friend. She’s not happy about the idea of replacing her.”
Well, crap. Now Lauren wasn’t really excited about replacing anyone either.
Before she could say anything, Robin waved a hand. “Don’t worry about it. She’ll have to get over it whether it’s you or anyone else if Camille isn’t coming back.”
Lauren nodded. “But I’m just temporary.” She’d keep repeating that as long as necessary to keep this Natalie person from hating her.
“Well, you’re still filling some big shoes in Nat’s mind, so I just wanted to warn you.”
“Uh, okay.” Lauren’s brain stumbled over itself trying to think of a way to back out of this now, but she couldn’t form a coherent string of words.
“Think of it this way: you just have to win over one person, Natalie, and the spot’s yours.” Robin flashed a big, warm, reassuring smile.
Lauren almost fell for it. “I’d better get back up front.”
“Right,” said Robin. “I’ll go make a list of a few tunes for you to have ready tomorrow night. You can handle that?”
Tomorrow night. There was no way she could learn a bunch of tunes, audition, and clean out Brandy’s room in one weekend.
“Of course!” The sound that came out of Lauren’s mouth was much perkier than the way she felt.
Robin hurried off again, while Lauren mentally kicked herself. It wasn’t like she was going to have a whole lot of time over the next twenty-four hours to learn a bunch of songs.
But she also didn’t have time to come up with an excuse or beat herself up for jumping to do something she probably couldn’t follow through on. The next hour of her shift flew by, as she chatted with teachers on their conference break and rang up T-shirts, CDs, and bumper stickers. The adorable yellow “You are my sunshine” onesie for the eight-month-pregnant vice-principal was the easiest and most satisfying sale of the afternoon. Lauren was flying high off of that one when she checked her cell and found a text from Tyler.
Tyler: Just wanted to make sure you had my number. If you need any help this weekend.
She kept her thumbs hovering over the keypad, holding herself back from typing in all-caps, YES, PLEASE, HELP ME.
Or worse.
She considered thanking him for the offer and telling him she’d be fine. It was probably the right thing to do.
Lauren: Thanks.
Tyler: I’m serious.
Lauren: I know you are. I appreciate it.
She should have put the phone down and left it at that. She needed to practice, not drool over Tyler. But her brain refused to let go that image of him nuzzling her parents’ pathetic-looking dog. Not to mention the mounds of stuff she had to go through in Brandy’s room.
Lauren: I’m actually not sure I can do it all alone.
She immediately scrambled to find a way to delete her last text, knowing full well it was too late.
Tyler: Tonight? When do you get off work?
She blinked at the screen. What was she supposed to say?
Brandy hopped in her head again with, You’re supposed to say what time you get off work, dummy. Brandy was in her head a lot lately. And she was going to be in her head a lot more once Lauren started digging through her stuff with her best friend in the room. Her ridiculously hot best friend.
Lauren was pretty sure if Brandy knew what Lauren was really thinking, she wouldn’t be encouraging her to tell Tyler what time she got off work. Brandy had insisted she and Tyler were just friends, but Lauren always wondered if there was something more between them. Something they’d never get the chance to explore now.
Lauren: 9, but I can’t ask you to do this.
Tyler: You aren’t asking. I offered. I can meet you at the house at 9:30.
She shook her head at the phone.
Lauren: Too weird. Haven’t even seen you in months and don’t know if I can do this with you around. And you shouldn’t have to. It’s my job.
There was another pause.
Tyler: I think I need to.
Damn. She couldn’t deny him his own brand of therapy.
She was going to have to suck it up now and spend the weekend with the guy. And squeeze in practice around that. And somehow not stare at him. Or think about Brandy.
Lauren: OK. It’s just weird. It’s going to be weird, right?
Tyler: Probably. But neither of us have to suffer through the weird alone this way.
Shit. Why did he have to look like that and go around saying perfect shit, too?
Tyler: Tell you what. I’ll bring Thai noodles and we can eat and catch up before we do the weird stuff.
The back of her neck tingled, and she covered her mouth to stifle a laugh as someone dropped a stack of T-shirts on the counter. Lauren put her phone on the shelf beneath the register and flashed the customer a warm smile. But it was all for show, because once the humor wore off, she wasn’t smiling inside.
Thai noodles.
Brandy’s favorite.
When she finished the sale and got back to her phone, ready to cancel, to explain that this was all just too weird and she’d be better off doing it alone, she found another text.
Tyler: Sorry. Tacos?
Every muscle in her body relaxed as she exhaled.
Lauren: Perfect.
Chapter 3
After a few hours of watching old Arrow episodes, Tyler looked at the clock and turned off the TV. His stomach fluttered and twisted.
He’d second-guessed himself a million fucking times before he sent that offer to help. It was the right thing to do. Even if Lauren couldn’t admit it, he knew she absolutely needed help. But his palms were sweating sitting in his own damn house, so who knew what was going to happen when he got over there.
&n
bsp; Not that anything could happen. This was Lauren. Brandy’s sister. They were both grieving. Not a damn thing could happen. No matter how much he’d wanted something to happen for years.
This was a bad idea. A fucking terrible idea, if he was being honest with himself.
But it was a terrible idea he’d already committed to.
Tyler gave Nicki a few belly scratches before he got up to leave. “I’ve got to go out for a while, girl,” he explained to the dog. “Important stuff.”
Nicki lifted her head and stared at him, as she shook from Tyler’s scratching.
“I have to help a friend’s sister do some really hard stuff. That’s all. Just helping a friend.”
Nicki rolled to sit up on the couch, looking at him with a long, soulful stare.
“Don’t you start, too.”
She grunted and turned away.
Tyler picked up his phone again and texted Nicki’s person, while she gave him a good long side eye.
Tyler: Don’t worry about food for me.
Darren: Caught me on break. Good for you! Go get her.
Tyler: Not like that.
Darren: Sure. Whatever you say.
He rolled his eyes at the phone and gave Nicki a frown. “You’re both wrong, you know that?”
Nicki grunted again and heaved herself to the floor before walking toward her water dish.
They were both wrong. Darren and the dog.
This wasn’t a date.
This was closure.
This was helping a friend.
There was no way he could abandon Lauren to go through Brandy’s things alone. Brandy would kill him if he did that. Or haunt him.
He was doing this for Brandy and Lauren. And, yes, he was going over there for himself, too. To move on. That was all.
Tyler grabbed his keys from the table and froze when his fingers wrapped around the leather key fob.
