I stared at the ashy remains of Valentina and swallowed hard, still numb from the shock of it all. Minutes ago, she had still been here with us. How was this possible? It didn't feel real.
"Aidan?" My head whipped around at the sound of Savannah's voice. I knew I was not equipped to deal with her grief as well. I knew all too painfully Valentina had been Savannah's best friend. "Oh. Oh no. No. That's not. Please..." My skin felt itchy and uncomfortable as I heard her start to cry. I pulled away from Griffin long enough to catch Savannah as her knees buckled, holding her against my chest and patting her head like she was a dog.
"Okay. C'mon, we need to get home." I couldn't do this, I really couldn't. I was a terrible boyfriend, but I didn't have it in me. Griffin let out another anguished cry that twisted my heart and stomach. Savannah tensed in my arms and she looked at me. Her eyes were red already as they glassed over with the pain she felt for Griffin as well. Reaching out, I brushed my thumb under her eyes, collecting the pooling tears. I didn't know what to say or where I could even begin to comfort her.
We couldn't afford to fall apart right now. That much was clear. We needed to get back to the Underground, we needed to regroup and we needed to come up with a plan. I swallowed the last of my emotions and did what I did best: shut off. Now wasn't the time for the King to lose his shit. I was going to be fine, if I needed to be fine for the next two hours or two years, I would do what I needed to, to make sure my people didn't lose it.
"Savannah, help Griffin. I'll... get Val." I swallowed hard as I released Savannah. She did as she was told, moving to the other God's side and helping him onto his feet. I watched her struggle with him for a moment, making sure he didn't fight her or Gods forbid throw a punch before I turned to the corpse on the ground.
I took a moment to close my eyes, taking a deep breath before I bent to carefully lift her. It was a struggle to not knock more of her crumbling form off. Once I was sure I could make it through the portal I walked, careful not to take any steps that might jar me and lose her.
Passing through the entrance back into the throne room of the Underworld, I was unprepared for the reception. I knew Valentina had made herself known with most of the Gods but I would have never guessed how passionately they all felt for her. People were crying, others looked angry and out for blood. But none was so awful looking as Griffin who was standing near the heap of destroyed thrones on the dais.
People tried to get a look at her as I passed but I only had one goal in mind: get to Griffin. I stopped behind him, staring at the destruction and knowing Valentina wouldn't have approved of it.
"If I summoned her, would she come?"
"I don't know, Griffin. Do you want her to come?" I could barely handle seeing my own mother in that unnerving ghostly form. Would I be able to handle seeing my soulmate like in Griffin's position? No. It would be the thing that sent me over the edge. Unfortunately, Griffin has always teetered on the edge. Would her death be the thing that pushed him over? "You'd have to send her away eventually." He didn't answer me, his back still turned as we both stared at the mess of his throne and I continued to hold onto the corpse of innocence embodied.
The thrones beyond us began to float, putting themselves back together as if nothing at all had happened. I watched the final pieces fall into place and Griffin's shoulders slumped with defeat.
"Typical. I can fix chairs, but I can't fix her." He turned to face me and I didn't know what to say to him. I didn't fully understand what had happened. Given Griffin's reaction though, I sensed it had something to do with him. I couldn't help but still wonder if maybe it had been his magic that had done this to her. The angry, hateful voice in the back of my head reminded me Griffin tended to screw things up. Was it out of the realm of possibility he had done this to Valentina? Or if he wasn't the direct cause of this, he had obviously been there, it begged the question of why he didn't try to stop it.
"Where do you want her?" My throat ached as I forced myself to speak. I needed to focus on the task at hand, keep myself busy instead of speculating and giving into my building anger over this unfair turn of events. Grief was a funny thing; and today had been overwhelmingly awful with it.
I stepped away from the dais, hell bent on putting Valentina down before I lost anymore of her. A sarcophagus appeared in the middle of the room, made of gold. It was covered in flowers and vines, candles surrounded it and illuminating the bed where she would lay for eternity.
"Here?" I walked over to it, careful as I laid her down making sure not to disrupt any of the pieces that were still holding her together. As I stood there staring at her, my heart throbbed in my chest while my hand hovered over her face. I wished she looked real. I wished it wasn't her.
My jaw tensed as I fought the burn at the back of my eyes. I would keep it together.
Everyone piled in around me and I stepped back, letting them get a good look at her. I wished I had the ability to make her appear like herself instead of as this carcass of soot and smoke.
"Now what do we do?"
"We hold a funeral rite, like the Greeks would've."
"Does anyone want to say anything?" Savannah stepped next to me and slipped her hand into mine. I was thankful she could step up in my place and lead this moment. Griffin was understandably useless and I was at a loss for words. I was afraid if I did speak I would break, letting my armor slip and that was the worst thing that could happen. I needed to be strong. I was strong. I repeated the mantra repeatedly in my head. Hopefully the more I told myself, the more of a reality it would become. It was better this way. If I didn't feel anything at all, I wouldn't fall apart in front of my pantheon.
"Val was... Val was a light in a dark room. She had this uncanny ability to make everyone she met feel like they mattered to her even if she knew nothing about them. She had the biggest heart of everyone I ever knew. And she was so insightful. For someone her age, it was amazing how she had this wisdom beyond her years. She always had the right thing to say. She could make you feel better in a moment. She was such a beautiful individual."
"Valentina never stopped smiling. I have never met a person who never stopped smiling. She was blessedly optimistic that even when there didn't seem to be a chance in hell, she believed for the both of you."
As people spoke, giving deep meaningful eulogies to honor her memory, Griffin moved ever closer to her corpse. Savannah was tense at my side as she watched him, expecting him to break at some point. To be honest, I'm sure everyone present was waiting for him to snap. It had to be coming soon, he couldn't last this long before losing it again.
When he moved to touch her, Savannah pulled herself away from me and moved to his side, "Griffin?" She reached out and I supposed he touched her because her voice grew stern like she was a mother, "Griffin."
"She's trapped."
"She's gone, Griffin." The words hit me like a sucker punch to the gut. I turned from the pack, taking a few long steps away from people as my hands fisted at my sides. Anger coursed through me at a pace I had never known before. I knew her death had been avenged but I wanted nothing more now than to rip off the face of whoever had done this.
Sucking in a sharp breath through my nose, I forced myself to pull it together before turning to face the group once more. As I approached the memorial once more, I overheard Savannah telling Griffin he ought to say something for her memory. Zeus wanted me to as well, he wanted to speak for the daughter who had been close to him in the way most teenage daughters were with their fathers. But had I known Val well to properly honor her? Had any of us in a single month?
"Val, I didn't get the chance to say it enough, but I love you. I think in a strange way, I've always known I love you. The first time we met, after you'd spent weeks hiding from me and taking care of me, you took my breath away and I knew. You were it. The whole reason for my life. But I ruin everything I touch. And you were no exception. I ruined you... And I'm sorry. It should be me here and not you. I should be the one who is trapped and alone fore
ver with no one crowding around to say their condolences because I didn't deserve the love you offered me. I would trade places with you if I could. I would give my life ten times over to bring back your smile and your beautiful laugh."
It was a cold thought, but I found myself wondering why he didn't. Surely as the King of the Underworld he had that ability, if he cared so damn much about her why didn't he trade places with someone like her. She didn't deserve this kind of end. She had such a long life ahead of her. My thoughts rolled away with themselves and I snapped myself back to reality. This wasn't Griffin's fault.
It was Savannah who reaffirmed it.
But Griffin didn't believe her, "You don't know that. You weren't there."
"No, I wasn't. But I learned recently you would've never done something to deliberately hurt her. She told me, and she believed that strongly. Whatever you think happened, is your mind spinning your guilt. But you shouldn't let it win. It wasn't your fault and none of us here think it was your fault."
I wondered if he saw the change that had occurred amongst us in the few days since the takeover had happened. I would've never imagined a week ago Savannah would be defending Griffin from himself. But Valentina had that kind of effect on us. She was good and pure, she showed us what kind of person we all wanted to be. Despite being wronged so many times by this man who had given her all his heart without telling her, she had forgiven him again and again. It was a lesson maybe Savannah had learned from her.
But the realization made my heart ache more.
"She didn't deserve a death like that."
"She shouldn't have died in the first place. Asher must've done something, it makes no sense why she died when she was immortal. Asher is the only one among us that knows the magic better than we do, almost as well as Atlas. He did something, I'm sure of it."
Everyone around us shifted uncomfortably as the memorial had shifted from a group event to something far more deep and personal for Griffin. But they were enraptured, like I was, maybe waiting for Griffin's train wreck to crash and burn or maybe they wanted to understand. Whatever it was, no one had the courtesy to walk away and give him the space he clearly needed. I was about to move them when Griffin spoke again.
"I have an idea." We all watched him move to his throne, lower himself and I narrowed my eyes in suspicion. Who was he going to summon? What use would that prove to have. He answered my question with a single name turned my blood cold, "Soren-" He didn't know his last name.
"Rogers." I spoke and we made eye contact. I didn't know what he hoped to get out of this, but maybe the human side of Coeus would be more helpful than his power-hungry Titan had ever been. I nodded, encouraging Griffin to go on.
"Soren Rogers, I summon you to the throne room." By now everyone was watching this unfold, desperate to see what was going to happen. But Soren didn't come, at least not like my mother had. I glanced at the door, expecting a knock at any moment. Griffin lost his temper, bellowing, "Soren!" His voice shook the hall we stood in, the stalagmites shaking and small rocks from the wall coming loose. The nervous energy around me grew as everyone waited with baited breath.
To my left Zane withdrew his sword, tensing ready for the fight. It came, three short knocks. Everyone turned to see. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched a couple people conjure their own magic in case there was more than Soren beyond door. I couldn't fault them for being on edge.
Griffin gave the all-clear and Zane approached the door cautiously, he didn't hesitate as he pulled the door open and brandished his sword so the person beyond knew the weight of the situation. Beyond it was Soren looking as alive as he had been in life. There was nothing that might distinguish him from the Titan who had overpowered the mortal, he looked the same as ever.
"Enter," Griffin commanded and Zane stepped back enough to allow Soren to squeeze through the threshold and beyond Zane's muscular form. He looked nervous, and for good reason too.
"Hi... Everyone."
Chapter 6
Unadulterated rage coursed through me as he sauntered into the room, looking sheepish. He wasn't allowed to feel guilt, he wasn't supposed to be able to trick me into pitying him. To Zeus and myself, it didn't matter that his mortal self was nothing but a pawn in Asher's bigger game. Victim to the whims of his power-hungry Titan.
No, he wasn't allowed to feel bad for what he had done. If he had been stronger, if he wasn't weak-willed, none of this would've happened and I would not allow myself to feel sorry for him.
No one moved as he moved further into the room, his eyes glancing around as he took everyone in. No one moved. No one breathed as they watched him. Perhaps it was out of fear that if they were to move first, Griffin would mislay his grief and anger on them instead of on Valentina's murderer. For this was him - was it not?
I didn't know the whole story and I knew Griffin would never be able to tell an unbiased tale of her demise but I sensed Griffin wouldn't have brought this man here if he hadn't played an integral role in her death.
His eyes finally found Valentina, laid out on the sarcophagus like a decaying statue. He couldn't bear the sight of her as he looked away, anywhere but there.
"I suppose you're going to-"
"No." Griffin's voice was surprisingly firm, commanding. It was the voice of a king. The King of the Underworld. "I'm not here to cast judgment on you. I have half a mind to leave you wandering for the rest of your existence because you don't deserve the reprieve of knowing your judgment has been cast."
I wasn't savvy on the affairs of the dead but I could only guess leaving him to wander for the rest of his existence may be a harsher punishment than that of sending him to Tartarus. Soren winced accordingly and nodded his head as if he was accepting of his lot.
"I'm sorr-"
"Do not talk unless directly asked a question. Do you understand?" Once more Griffin's voice was firm and commanding, leaving no room for argument. Myself, as God of all the Gods, I felt myself awe under his power here within his domain.
Soren nodded, his eyes dropping back to the floor as he avoided any more eye contact with Griffin. Where had this man been for the last two months? This was someone I could've sided with, someone I would've happily stood next to and defended beside all the other Gods. Instead he had let someone else, someone more cowardly, take his place.
"Good. How did you kill Valentina?" I flinched at the words. Knowing them and hearing them proved to have two different effects. My eyes sought out Valentina's murderer once more as I stared at him, trying to figure out why he could've ever killed the one true and wholly good person among us. What sort of scum did you have to be to kill someone who would've never defended herself for fear of hurting her assailant?
"It wasn't me, it hasn't been me for a while."
There he went with his attempt to make us pity him again. A few people in the crowd shifted and I saw many eyes glance away as they softened with sorrow.
But Griffin felt the same as me, "I don't care about your conscience, or your attempts to absolve yourself from what you did. I want to know how you killed her."
He said it again and the pang clenched my stomach as well as my heart this time. My hands drew themselves into fists. Morbid curiosity wanted to know how he had done it as well, if only to protect Savannah from any future attacks. But at the same time, I didn't think I could handle hearing the specifics of how Valentina died.
The man in front of me might already be dead but I couldn't be held accountable for any reaction I may have to his tale.
"It's a little more complicated than that." My feet moved without my brain, stepping closer to Griffin. Savannah seemed to have moved as well, either at the same time or before me but she was the one who wasn't taking his avoidance passively.
"Start from the beginning." She was snappish and cold. Her Queen must've been hovering nearer to the surface than usual. I, myself, was shaking with barely controlled rage. People were still watching. They were still watching me for their leads, to know what to do. I had
to control him but he was aching inside. The pain in my chest was both my own and his. I had lost a friend but he had lost a daughter.
There was no way of bringing her back, not her soul or her body. That much I could glean from the horror that filled Zeus' mind. Something like this had never happened under his watch before. I had failed him as a vessel.
"Okay, alright." Soren remained unsteady and nervous as he stood before us, "Well, Atlas came to get me while I was at work."
"Past this, to the point when Coeus took over."
"Yeah, okay, well Coeus was always there. He was this voice in the back of my head. Sort've like Jiminy Cricket, you know? He would tell me to do things and other times, tell me not to do something. I thought it was like my conscience and never thought much of it. Until he started asking me to do things I didn't think were morally correct. When I didn't do it, he stepped in and did it himself. I think that was the point when he realized he didn't need me as a middle man; he was perfectly capable of doing it all himself without my help. He came more and more frequently, until it was at the point where I couldn't send myself back into control. I had to succumb to him. I was stuck in my own head, watching my hands do things I would've never consented to do. I could hear everything they were planning and I couldn't stop it."
He still refused to admit his part in what happened to Valentina. He spoke generically, avoiding the specifics. I opened my mouth prepared to say something and demand the truth from him when Griffin spoke again.
"If you feel bad about what you did, now is your chance to set things right. Tell us everything you know about Asher."
"Asher is... old. He's been around since the 1600s or something. I think that was the first-time Atlas released the souls into the world, and during that time Zeus impregnated a lady. Asher was born in the lap of luxury. He was never denied anything, but by the time he was sixteen, he realized it wasn't because of who his "parents" were that made people's wills bend to him. He had this uncanny ability to make people do what he wanted by telling them to do it. It was the Zeus-affect. The Godliness inside of him people recognized and innately answered to. Atlas came to him when he was twenty and told him about his real father, telling him he would be able to live for a long time, but he wasn't immortal. To become immortal, he had to kill his own father, contain his father's immortality and he would be able to live forever."
Grace of Gods Boxset: Reincarnated Greek Gods YA/NA Series Page 75
