He climbed into his truck, his heart hammering in his chest, and white-knuckled the steering wheel, trying to get a damn hold of himself. Thank fuck the other guys weren’t here to see him acting like this. Spooked over some woman of all things.
Like he needed this shit on top of everything else. His CO had pulled him aside after his SEAL team’s drills that afternoon, asking for his assistance on some computer fuck-up on base. Apparently the secure systems had been repeatedly targeted by systematic attacks, source unknown. The IT staff always handled that sort of thing, but some fancy pants security specialist had been sent down from the Pentagon to brief the higher-ups and assess the vulnerabilities of their systems. Christopher had extensive background in computer forensics, so his CO asked him to sit in on the meetings tomorrow.
He grumbled as he turned the key in the ignition. He didn’t have time to deal with other people’s messes. Their SEAL team was finally all back together after the youngest man in their unit recovered from a serious injury sustained on their last mission. One month at Walter Reed up in Bethesda, and Evan “Flip” Jenkins was back down in Little Creek with the rest of them. Right where he belonged.
Those guys were like his brothers. Christopher and his SEAL team trained hard and fought harder. They worked in perfect synchronicity as one unit, both on and off the battlefield. Hours of PT and drills left them able to know one another’s movements, read each other’s thoughts. That tight bond was critical in battle and when running ops. He knew the other five guys inside and out and would give up his life for any of them.
Now that they were finally all back together, he didn’t need the added distraction of worrying about network security on base—something the Navy’s large IT and network security staff should be equipped to handle. And he sure as hell didn’t need to be sitting here distracted over some damn mystery woman. The raven-haired beauty in the SUV had already driven off, and he was still sitting in his truck pining over the past like some chick. Hell.
Of the six men on his SEAL team, two were now officially taken. Evan and Patrick “Ice” Foster each had a gorgeous woman of their own. If Christopher hadn’t seen those two tough, alpha males fall for their women with his own eyes, he wouldn’t have believed it. For dudes destined to be single, they sure the hell seemed happier than shit now. Guess the saying was true, he thought with a smirk: the bigger they are, the harder they fall.
The rest of the men on his SEAL team were as single as him. And preferred it that way. Staying out of a relationship helped him stay out of trouble—both on missions with his teammates and here at home. The fact that the memories of his haunted past were damn near tearing his heart out right now just proved how much a man like him was meant to be alone. The woman that filled all his dreams wasn’t here. The woman whose violet eyes he saw whenever he had meaningless sex with some anonymous woman wasn’t strolling around the parking lot on base.
That girl was back on the beaches of Coronado, long gone. She wasn’t even a girl anymore because that shit was a damn lifetime ago. Hell, she probably had a husband and three kids by now. A family. That’s what she wanted, right? Not some fuck-up who’d busted his ass in the Navy, somehow gotten into the SEALs, and deployed around the world half the damn time. Not a guy without a family, who barely had an idea what the word even meant.
Not the man who’d questioned her when she’d needed him most. Who’d taken the one person in his life he’d actually cared for and thrown her away. He’d been too much of a damned coward to even chase after her. To track her down and drag her back to Coronado where she belonged—with him. In his arms and in his bed. For forever and all that shit.
Hell, if that mix-up had gone down today, when he was older and wiser and had seen the world, he’d have moved heaven and earth to find her. To make things right between them. But back then he was young, stubborn. Foolish. And who was he kidding? Even if she was the best fucking part of his life, she was better off without him.
His father had walked out on him—it was damn near better that way since the only way he communicated was with his fists. His single mother did what she could to raise him right—not that she’d been around much either, working two jobs just to make ends meet. Joining the Navy right out of high school was the greatest thing he’d ever done. The Navy was the only thing that had brought him something solid, regimented, and real in his life. Something to fight for and believe in. As a SEAL, he protected the defenseless, came to the aid of those who couldn’t help themselves. Accomplished missions when there was no one else to do the job. When failure was not an option. Maybe no one had been around to defend him from his old man when he was a kid, but he sure the hell would stand up for what was right and protect others now. His SEAL brothers were more like blood brothers—truer than any real family he’d ever known.
At thirty-three, Christopher had been in the military for fifteen years. Nearly half of his life had been devoted to service. He’d seen shit that other people would never even dream about. Fought with criminals, drug lords, and terrorists. Gone on missions he could never even talk about because they were so highly classified. Now he was spooked over some babe he’d spotted in the parking lot? Unbelievable.
This woman just happened to be his ex’s sexier-than-sin lookalike. That shit didn’t mean anything. No way in hell was he still pining over some lost love. This woman was just something to taunt him, reminding him of what he could never have. What he’d never deserved to begin with.
No way would Lexi Mattingly somehow end up here, clear on the other side of the country, waltzing around Little Creek like she owned the place. No way would he be lucky enough to have a chance with that woman more than once in his lifetime.
***
Lexi cruised along Atlantic Avenue in Virginia Beach, windows down, sea air blowing through her SUV. She tapped her fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of the music on her stereo. Cruising down the road was a pretty apt description of her drive to the hotel, and it sure beat sitting in traffic on the Beltway in DC. She inhaled the salty scent of the breeze and smiled. Fifteen minutes after leaving base, and she could already feel her head clearing and her body relaxing. Amazing what a little distance could do.
She pulled to a stop at the entrance of her oceanfront hotel, lining up behind the other cars full of people checking in. She felt bad for having to bail on her best friend tonight, but it wasn’t like she’d exactly had a choice in the matter. Or like she could just pop back up to DC for the game. Kenley would probably meet a guy at Nat’s Park, have a new boyfriend by the weekend, and be married and popping out cute babies by next year. The exact opposite of the way Lexi’s own life would turn out, given the trajectory she’d been on so far.
A serious boyfriend who didn’t want to settle down, followed by a string of meaningless relationships and orgasm-less sex? Check, check, and check. Wasn’t her personal life fan-freaking-tastic at the moment?
She inched forward, admiring the gorgeous, sand-colored high-rise that loomed in front of her. Palm trees dotted the landscaping in front of the building while the Atlantic served as the spectacular backdrop. Every room had an oceanfront balcony, complete with a white railing. She may not have the house, yard, and white picket fence, but an oceanfront suite would do. She’d have to pay more than the government per diem allotted for her trip, but the view of the sparkling Atlantic was worth a few more dollars. As an in-demand security specialist who’d risen through the ranks at the Pentagon and who’d still been able to obtain several lucrative contract jobs from time-to-time, she had the cash to splurge.
Funny, she never pictured herself at twenty-nine as raking in the big bucks, advising the government and large corporations on network security. She’d hack into their systems, show them where their vulnerabilities lie, and collect a fat paycheck for her efforts. Lexi had always figured she’d end up as a wife and mom by the time she turned thirty, staying home for a few years while the kids were young before returning to the fast-paced workforce and lifestyle
she was used to. She’d have a husband, a house, and a yard—not a sterile condo in the city that she had little time to decorate and even less time to spend in. She’d join the PTA and bake cupcakes for the school bake sales. Play with her kids. Be the picture of domestic bliss. And in her dreams, her children always had brown eyes like Christopher—not that she’d ever risk having kids with that bastard now.
It still smarted a little that all these years later she couldn’t entirely get that man out of her mind. That no other man had even come close to meeting the impossible standards he’d set. With his ruggedly masculine features, intense personality, and larger-than-life career as a Navy SEAL, he’d come into her world and swept her away. Literally and figuratively. He’d been protective and caring. Supportive. A dominant alpha male who’d decided Lexi would be his—and she was. His efforts in the bedroom had left her breathless. He was the first man she’d ever been with and the absolute only man ever to make her come for him—to have her literally screaming his name in pleasure.
She blushed just thinking about her nights with him. Even though she still hated him with all of her heart, a tiny part of her yearned for his touch. His kiss. His ability to pleasure and drive her wild. The string of sexual encounters she’d had since then had been pointless. Pitiful even. Most guys didn’t seem to notice if she was faking it when they took her to bed, but with Christopher? She’d been like putty in his hands. He cared for her but was possessive and dominating in the bedroom—driving her higher and higher as he sought her pleasure. He’d been her first—and he’d ruined her for other men.
She’d practically been a kid when she met him—just a foolish college girl with no idea what guys like him were like. He’d already been a SEAL when they met, the type of man used to attracting women wherever he went. She’d practically swooned when he’d noticed her. The sparks had been immediate, unstoppable. They’d clicked instantly, inexplicably. He was a tough, assertive SEAL; she was just an inexperienced college student.
But when they were together?
Fireworks. Explosions. Earth-shattering moments.
It was like the world stopped for everything but them.
The destructive crash landing of their relationship cut deep. Christopher turning his back on her when she’d been scared and helpless was not something she’d ever forgive or forget.
Good riddance.
She climbed out of the SUV, one of the valets rushing over to offer his assistance. She directed him to the suitcase in her trunk and grabbed her briefcase from the front seat. Her laptop and tablet were safely tucked inside, her briefings and notes from earlier stored on the hard drive. All of the classified information remained on the DoD computers, but the information she carried with her was still sensitive. Important. She’d lock her electronics in the safe in her room before she went out later tonight.
The valet directed her to a bellhop waiting to assist her. She followed him to the front doors of the massive hotel, noticing a man in dark sunglasses and a designer suit smoking a cigar at the far edge of the hotel’s driveway. He seemed out of place amongst the casual tourists, but then again, she was in a business suit as well.
He watched her from afar, seeming to silently appraise her. His slicked back hair didn’t have a strand out of place, and she could practically smell his strong cologne from thirty feet away. He was likely just some creep checking her out—what else was new? She was around men all day long in her field, and some respected women more than others. She wasn’t going to stand around worrying about some slimy dude in a slick suit. She felt his eyes burning into her as she strode inside. It took everything in her not to turn around and flip him off. Just to let him know that she knew exactly what he was thinking.
Five minutes later, she was following the bellhop into the elevator, keycard in hand. In ten minutes, she planned to have her toes in the sand, drink in hand. There was no sense in letting regrets from the past ruin her evening. Maybe a few of the memories were nostalgic, but most of them were more bitter than sweet. She’d get the job done, and get on with her life. Just like she always had. All she had to do was make it through the week around all those damn SEALs.
Chapter 3
Christopher parked his truck in a garage near the beach an hour later and sauntered down the sidewalk to Anchors, a popular Virginia Beach bar that his SEAL team frequented. The bustling hangout was always filled with single military guys and local women alike, making it the perfect place to carouse. He and his buddies usually grabbed drinks there every week, chasing after the pretty ladies and more often than not taking one home for the night. Their team of six single men was now down to four, but hell. He could spend a few hours unwinding with them after the day he’d had.
He’d changed after work into well-worn jeans and a tee shirt, but that didn’t lessen the stares of the women as he stepped inside. They loved a man in a uniform, but with his short, military-style cropped hair and build of a SEAL, he didn’t exactly blend in even while wearing civilian clothes. His muscular frame filled out anything he wore. Normally he loved the attention, but tonight he just needed a drink to clear his damn head.
Christopher and his buddies had met their fair share of women at Anchors over the years, but lately, he’d only spend a night or two with a woman before moving on to the next. No sense in leading anyone on when he knew he wasn’t going to be around for the long haul. He’d be upfront with his intentions, saving both him and the woman he took home a helluva lot of grief. He was ashamed to admit it, but many of those women didn’t care one way or another. They wanted the allure of spending the night in the bed of a SEAL, and who was he to turn down an attractive lady’s offer? He sure wasn’t looking for a relationship. His one bitter breakup years ago had left him enough heartache for a lifetime. Not that he’d fucking admit that to anyone. Ever.
He was running late in meeting the guys, his mind a jumbled mess ever since leaving base earlier. The woman from the parking lot haunted him. What the hell was that about anyway? He’d gone damn near ten years without seeing or hearing from Lexi. He thought about her, sure. What red-blooded male wouldn’t? Her jet black hair, violet eyes, and smoking hot body were the stuff wet dreams were made of. And she’d been his. Not some fantasy woman. A real flesh-and-blood woman who’d let him make her his own, take her to bed every night, and teach her just how pleasurable sex could be.
Christ. She was a fucking virgin when he’d met her. No wonder no other woman ever seemed as sweet, innocent, and genuine. He’d been her first—her first serious boyfriend, first lover, first everything. Not to mention the first asshole that had broken her heart.
But he’d moved on. Learned to live with his regret. The past was in the past. Now some babe he’d spotted for only an instant had his heart skittering to a stop and his mind replaying movie reels of what had happened a lifetime ago. What he needed was a couple of beers and some harmless flirting to keep the memories from churning through his mind. To keep the ghosts from his past at bay. That shit would haunt anyone.
In the far corner of Anchors, he finally spotted some of the guys on his team: Brent “Cobra” Rollins was nursing a beer, his eyes flicking with interest around the crowded bar. Mike “Patch” Hunter was chatting with two young co-eds, and Evan was sitting with his girlfriend, Alison, his arm slung casually over the strawberry blonde’s shoulder. Alison was a sweet little thing, a nurse at the local hospital. Although Christopher sure as shit wasn’t the settling down type, he could see why Evan would be interested in her. That guy had a stable family background and wanted a wife and kids. He was the youngest guy on the team, and although he’d seen a lot in his years as a SEAL, he wasn’t jaded about life the way the rest of them were.
After a serious injury in the field just over a month ago, Evan looked happier and healthier than ever. With the pretty nurse on his arm, it made complete and total sense. Those two had a bit of a slow start, with Evan constantly chasing after her. Or was it Alison chasing him, secretly wanting to be caught? Chr
istopher smirked. The explosion that had blown up the vehicle Evan was driving while on their last mission had been brutal, but if Evan’s injuries were what had been needed to finally bring him and Alison together, Christopher supposed that it had worked out for the best. Those two seemed meant for one another.
But as for Christopher needing a wife or a family? Not a fucking chance.
The door opened behind him, and he realized he’d been standing there lost in thought. First the parking lot, now this? He was going to have to turn in his man card after tonight.
Hell.
Matthew “Gator” Murphy walked into Anchors, slapping him on the back. “What’s up, Blade?” he asked, calling Christopher by his nickname.
“Just got here, bro.”
“And we got here just in time,” Matthew crooned.
Christopher barely got a word out before Matthew drawled hello to a group of women, sauntering off and leaving him standing there alone. The dude sure knew how to lay on the southern charm. One of the women glanced Christopher’s way and pouted, but he wasn’t in the mood to flirt with some chick he’d likely never see again. Especially one acting like a sullen teenager.
Hell. When did he turn into such an old man?
Christopher scowled and headed over to where the other guys were. The only man missing from their team was Patrick. He had a young son and had just started a relationship with Rebecca a few months ago, so he was usually absent from their guys’ nights at Anchors. Patrick and Rebecca each had a kid, so that didn’t really allow them to spend their nights hanging out in bars. Not that Patrick needed to nowadays anyway since he had a woman of his own. That guy was completely smitten with her. The guys liked to rib him about it, since Patrick’s nickname was Ice. Rebecca had broken through that ice-cold persona, and after an incident earlier in the summer where a stalker had been after her, the two of them were inseparable.
A SEAL's Surrender (Alpha SEALs Book 3) Page 2
