“I know, you poor darling.” She paced the room. “This is difficult to say.”
“Then it’s best simply to say it,” he said in a harder voice than he had expected.
Her brow rose. “I shall attribute your irritable mood to the events of this evening. I know I felt rather ill-tempered last night. It’s not pleasant to be abducted and dropped, you know.”
“My apologies,” he muttered.
“Accepted,” she said in a lofty manner and continued. “Before we were married ...” She frowned. “Perhaps you should sit down for this part, darling. It might be a bit shocking.”
His jaw clenched. “I prefer to stand.”
“I am concerned about your aching head.”
“It feels much better.”
“Really?” Her eyes widened in astonishment. “I know when I was abducted and dropped—”
“Would you stop saying that?” he snapped.
“What?” Her eyes widened in an innocent manner. “That I was abducted and dropped?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
Because it was at my direction! “It was a dreadful incident and I do not wish to be reminded of it.”
“You poor dear. Very well then.” She shrugged. “Stand if you feel up to it.”
“I’m fine.”
“As I was saying.” She drew a deep breath and yet she appeared remarkably collected. “Before we were married, I worked as an agent for a government department that, oh, operates for the most part in a clandestine manner.”
“Oh?” Was this the moment to tell her he already knew? Or should he just keep his mouth closed?
“I had thought it was all in the past.” She shook her head. “But last night I realized that it will never be in the past. Indeed, I fear now my true identity has been revealed. It had been hidden up until now, thanks to the efforts of a truly remarkable man. Quite dashing and adventurous and I must say ...” She sighed again. “The intoxicating way he takes pen to paper is only eclipsed by his charm in person.”
He glared. “And?”
“I know that after last night, you are full of, well, confidence in your courage, and indeed, I am most proud of you,” she added quickly. “But you have to admit, that in spite of one adventurous moment, aside from your past adventures with women ...” She shook her head in an annoyingly kind manner. “You’re really not an adventurous sort.”
He stared.
“And I have come to realize that you might well never be safe as long as I am in your life.”
“I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” he said through clenched teeth.
She continued as if he hadn’t said a word. “So, in order to keep you alive and well ...” She shook her head sadly. “I’m afraid I have no choice but to leave you. Forever.”
“What?” Surely she wasn’t serious?
“Oh, darling, don’t look at me that way.” She cast him a pleading look. “This is as difficult for me as it is for you.” She paused. “Although I suppose I will be able to turn to Sir for comfort and—”
“This has gone far enough,” he said in a hard tone.
“And I much prefer it go no farther.” She sniffed back a sob. “Why, when you were abducted practically in front of me—”
“When I was—” At once, he realized the truth. Adrian wasn’t abducted. Sir was.
She crossed her arms over her chest. “When. You. Were. What?”
Damnation! For the first time in his life, words failed him. “Uh ...”
Her eyes narrowed. “When. You. Were. What?”
He winced. “How long have you known?”
“Only since this morning.” She studied him coolly.
“How did you find out?”
“I found my letters in your desk.”
“You went into my desk?” Indignation sounded in his voice.
She raised a brow. “I thought you had nothing to hide.”
“I don’t now,” he said under his breath. He studied her cautiously. “Are you very furious?”
“This morning I was furious. Very furious. As the day wore on, I became less angry and more determined that you needed to be taught a lesson.”
“At the very least,” he said staunchly. She didn’t seem nearly as angry as he thought she’d be. Perhaps this wouldn’t be as bad as he had anticipated. “The Langham then?”
A reluctant smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “It was going quite well, too. And then, of course, you were kidnapped.” She paused. “I do feel bad about that as it was ultimately my fault. Oh, not in the way my abduction was orchestrated by you—”
He cringed.
“But it was my mad cousin who had already killed two men, holding a knife to your throat.”
“Not at all your fault.”
“I know that. Still ...” A shadow passed across her eyes and she shuddered. At what she had seen or what she had done or what might have been, it scarcely mattered.
“My mother would have been most upset.”
She cast him a grateful smile. “As would I.”
He stepped toward her. “Evie.”
She held out her hand to stop him and stepped back. “Very nearly losing you put your deceit—all of it—into an interesting perspective. While coming to your rescue, I had time to think.” She pulled a deep breath. “I understand, given the nature of the department, the need for secrecy. But I don’t understand why that applied to me.”
“Once I had met you as myself ...” He chose his words with care. “I wanted you to, well, want me. The man who had an extensive family and a new title and all the rather ordinary responsibilities that went along with it. Not the man who ferreted out information and apprehended villains and lived a life of secrets and danger.” He stepped closer. She studied him warily but didn’t move. “I was already in love with you by then.”
“I used to think we met by chance. It wasn’t chance, was it?”
“No.” He shook his head. “Your manner had changed and there was concern as to your loyalty. And rightly or wrongly, I saw it as my opportunity.”
“I see,” she said slowly. “I am assuming you then discovered I had simply grown weary of working for the department?”
He nodded.
“When you married me—”
“I did so because I could not imagine my life without you.”
“Aside from matters pertaining to Sir and the department. . .” She met his gaze directly. “Have you ever lied to me?”
“I lie to you all the time.”
Shock widened her eyes.
He moved closer. “The last time you wore that bilious green gown with the cream-colored lace and asked me if I liked it, I lied.”
“I see.” She nodded. “Go on.”
“When we went to Lady Lovett’s garden party last summer, I said I was looking forward to it.” He shook his head in a mournful manner. “I lied.”
She bit back a smile.
“When I said you could spend vast amounts of money in a frivolous manner and I would not say a word ...” He cringed. “It wasn’t a lie at the time. Now, however ...”
She arched a brow. “About nothing of importance then?”
“Well, vast amounts of money ...”
She choked back a laugh.
He met her gaze firmly. “I lied to you when I let you think I could live without you. That was a lie of omission.”
He was within a step of her now.
“I deceived you when I led you to believe that I didn’t take what I did, when I didn’t trust you, as a serious sin. Or perhaps that was another lie of omission. I’m not sure and it’s of no importance now. But I do regret my behavior and I am deeply sorry. I wouldn’t hurt you for anything in the world.”
“Why did you send me those notes? Why did you pretend to be Sir at the masquerade?”
“Because I am a fool,” he said firmly. “Because I find it hard to believe someone like you would choose someone like me over someone like Sir.”<
br />
She studied him for a long moment. “Do you know what is saving you, saving us really, aside from the fact that I came entirely too close to losing you tonight?”
“My devastating charm and complete and utter honesty?” he said hopefully.
“Not entirely.” She considered him for a moment. “For one thing, I have been little better than you in regards to our respective pasts.”
“There is that,” he murmured. Her eyes narrowed and he remembered his resolve to keep his mouth closed.
“For another ...” She drew a deep breath. “I know you, Adrian Hadley-Attwater. I may not have known all your secrets, but I know the kind of man you are.” There was a slight tremble in her voice. At the same moment he realized his cause was won, he vowed never to hear that tremble because of him again. “And I know that I want to end my days with my hand in yours.”
“Then you forgive me?” He pulled her into his arms.
“For all of it?” She gazed up at him. “Not quite yet.” She smiled in a wicked manner. “But I will allow you to continue to make it up to me. For the rest of your life, I think.”
“I should like nothing better.”
“No more lies,” she said firmly. “From either of us.”
“Agreed.” He grimaced. “However, you should know I am considering returning to the department. On a strictly occasional basis,” he added quickly. “Probably as nothing more than an advisor.”
“Occasionally, you say?”
“No more than that.”
“That does sound like fun.” She cast him a brilliant smile. “Working together again, you and I.”
“You and I?” Caution sounded in his voice.
“I have no intention of permitting you to do so without me.” She smiled in a smug manner. “You need me, Sir.”
“I believe I always have.” He stared down at her. “And I know I always will.” He pulled her closer against him. “I couldn’t live a single day without you, Evie. For the rest of my life I want your hand in mine.”
“Oh my.” She gazed into his eyes suspiciously. “Which one of you is speaking now?”
He raised a brow in a suggestive manner. “Which one would you like?”
She laughed. “It scarcely matters. Both of you are mine.”
“Forever.” He lowered his lips to hers, and it struck him once again that life was indeed made up of endings and beginnings. And he realized as well that for the rest of his days he would face each ending, every beginning, and all in between with the hand of the woman he loved held firmly in his. “But admit it, my love.” He brushed his lips across hers. “You like the idea of an adventurous husband.”
“Only if it’s you, darling. Only if it’s you.”
ZEBRA BOOKS are published by
Kensington Publishing Corp.
119 West 40th Street
New York, NY 10018
Copyright © 2012 by Cheryl Griffin
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.
If you purchased this book without a cover you should be aware that this book is stolen property. It was reported as “unsold and destroyed” to the Publisher and neither the Author nor the Publisher has received any payment for this “stripped book.”
Zebra and the Z logo Reg. U.S. Pat. & TM Off.
ISBN: 978-1-4201-2790-4
My Wicked Little Lies Page 30
