Chapter 25
Londynn
Once we step inside I search for the light switch but suddenly the recess lights that frame the small dining room and living room come on. I turn around and see that Jagger found the switch. “Do you want something to drink?”
“Sure," he answers.
I walk into the kitchen and look in the fridge all Farrah has stocked it with so far is wine, beer and water. I take a water out for me and a beer for Jagger. When I turn around Jagger is standing in the doorway of the small kitchen. I have to fight the urge to go to him again I extend my hand to him and he takes the beer. “Thanks.”
“Yeah.”
We stand in the kitchen in the tension filled, uncomfortable silent place. Finally, Jagger clears his throat. “Listen Londynn, I’m sorry. I know I’ve said that a lot these last few days, but I really mean it. I didn’t mean to hurt you and I didn’t even now Creed was there when I was talking to your brother.”
I know he didn’t mean to hurt me or Creed, but I have a feeling Duke did know and caused the whole thing. “I know that Jagger. Besides I think Duke was behind this scene tonight. I’m sure he knew that Creed was there and considering how close he and Ryce have always been I’m sure he already knew about Alivia. I think he meant to cause a fight between us thinking I’d run back home. So, actually I owe you an apology for my brother.”
Jagger shakes his head. “You don’t owe me anything and I know your brother is probably a lot of things and that you know him better than I do but I don’t think he’s as bad as you think.”
“Trust me Jagger, Duke is my father made over and that’s not a good thing. He loves that world we were raised in. He’d do anything to stay in it even if it meant breaking us up," I tell him, but I can see his disbelief in eyes.
He nods he head while rubbing his chin. “Okay.”
I study his amber eyes and I know that I could never stay mad at him. “I also owe you a thank you.”
“A thank you? For what?” Jagger asks.
“For inadvertently telling Creed. You did something that I wasn’t ready to deal with and didn’t have the courage to do. If he hadn’t overheard, you talking to Duke who knows when I would have told him. And the longer I took the harder it would have been on him.”
“Well, then I guess you’re welcome," he tells me and before I know it I’ve sat my bottle of water on the counter and closed the distance between us. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss his lips. I hear him sit his beer down and both his hand warp around my waist, pulling me closer to him. One of his hands slowly moves up my back until it’s buried in my hair, he deepens our kiss.
At some point his hands move to the back of my thighs, picking me up he sits me on top of the counter. I wrap my legs around his waist while his tongue teases my neck. I can’t help but let my mind wonder to where else I want him. A hand slip under my shirt and runs up until he’s cupping my breast. His tongue travels lower and I hear myself moan. He mumbles my name and the warmth of his breath tickles my neck causing me to let out a small giggle. He pulls back and rests his forehead against mine and looks into my eyes but the way he’s looking it’s like he can see down into my soul.
“You know the best thing about this condo?” I ask him while smiling at him. He raises his eyebrows and I slide off the counter. Taking his hand, I lead him to my bedroom. I pull him inside the room then walk around and shut the door. I lean back against the door and slip off my jacket. “Farrah’s bedroom is all the way across from mine and upstairs, it’s like we have privacy.”
He chuckles as he approaches me, the look in his eyes sets a fire through my body. “You are so much trouble.” He takes the hem of my tank and pulls over my head then he pushes me back against the door. His kisses are heated and urgent. I grip his shirt and tip toe to pull it over his head. He grabs me, spins me around and walks me back until we fall on my bed. His tongue teases around he cup of my bra while leaving me breathless.
I reach down and start undoing his pants while his hands reach around to unhook my bra. As soon as my bra is gone he pulls my nipple into his mouth and my head falls back in ecstasy. His free hand moves down to button of my jeans and before I know it his fingers are circling me. I let out a cry of pleasure. I can feel his smile against my chest. “It’s a good thing about this privacy.”
He stands up and removes the rest of his clothes then his hands wrap around my ankles and pulls me towards him. When I’m at the edge of the bed he helps me stand then removes the rest of my clothes. His amber eyes study me, like he’s memorizing every inch of me and for some reason that turns me on. I take a step towards him, wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him like our lives depend on it.
Turning us around I push him on the bed and I hear him chuckle again. “You want control tonight?” But I don’t answer before I pull him into my mouth. I hear the sharp intake of his breath. I continue to work him with my mouth until he’s begging me to stop but even then, it takes him pulling my head up for me to actually stop.
He sits up with me straddling his lap. His eyes lock on mine and I feel him roll his hips until he’s inside of me. My head falls back again, his hands go to my hips while I set the pace. Both of us panting for more, I can feel myself building and even he seems to be getting closer. Before I know realize it’s over and were both still in the same position trying to catch our breaths. He pulls my mouth to his and kiss me until I forget about the rest of the world.
****
I don’t know what time it is when I wake up, but I know it’s in the middle of the night. My sheet is wrapped around me tightly and I’m using Jagger’s chest as my pillow. His hand is stroking my hair and I wonder how long he’s been awake. I roll over onto my stomach, so I can see his face. “What’s wrong?”
His hand reaches out and strokes my cheek. “When I came tonight I wasn’t sure what would happen, and I definitely didn’t see this happening.”
“Honestly neither did I but I’m glad it did," I admit to him. I take his hand in between mine and trace the lines of his palm.
“I came here to tell you something tonight.” I look back into his eyes and I feel my anxiety sky rocket. “I admitted that I thought you were embarrassed by me and I think on some level I really thought that, but I think it’s more than that. I think I’m trying to ruin this because what I feel for you…scares the hell out of me Londynn.” He takes his free hand and rubs it over his face a few times. “What I felt Harlyn was real, I don’t doubt that but lately I wonder if Sadie wasn’t right. She said that even if Harlyn had lived that we might not be together because people grow and change. I was so convinced that after I lost her that I’d never feel like this again. That I’d never love again and then you walked into my life and I don’t know it’s like every emotion is so much stronger now.”
I kiss the palm of his hand the close my hands around his. “I get what you’re saying but you have to know that everything happens for a reason even if we don’t understand it. I can’t begin to imagine the pain you felt from losing her, but it has shaped the man you are today.” I reach out and run my hand over his chest and through his small patch of chest hair to his heart. “And this man is a man that I could love.”
He lets out a breath I hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “Good because I love you Londynn.”
I stare into his amber eyes then I lean forward and press a kiss to his lips. To a lot of people this would seem too soon but to me it feels like I finally found my home. I finally found my freedom it just happens to be in the shape of Jagger James. When I pull away from our kiss I rest my forehead on his and look into his eyes. “I love you too.”
****
Jagger
It’d been a week since Londynn and I had told each other that we were in love and honestly it had been one of the best weeks of my life. With the exception of those few moments when the silence set in and I felt guilty. I still didn’t know if I had a right to feel like this. Did I have a right to move on? In those moment
s I would always feel like I was doing something wrong to Harlyn’s memory and the memory of the couple we had been. Luckily, I had managed to keep busy between the shop, finding my own place, going to Vegas and picking up the rest of my stuff and spending my night tangled up in Londynn’s bed I’d had very few of those silent moments.
Most of those moments would happen after Londynn had drifted off to sleep. I’d watch her sleeping on my chest, her hair sprayed out across my arm and pillow, the scent of flowers filling my every breath. She seemed so at peace when she slept but it was in those moments that I worried I was doing wrong by Harlyn. I’d try to go to sleep to silence my mind completely, but sleep wouldn’t find me. It wouldn’t be until Londynn woke up and saw me still awake then insist on some hot tea that I’d finally find total silence.
Today was moving day for me. I had found a small loft in the same area as Connor’s. Londynn had wanted to help me move but she had to work at the clothing boutique. I was surprised by how much she loved her job and how dedicated she was to it. To be honest, I figured after her first day she’d quit saying it wasn’t for her since she’d never worked before, but it seemed she liked the idea of making her own money. So, while she was at work I was moving with the help of my brothers.
My goal was to be all moved in by tonight because I planned on Londynn and I having our first official date here. A homemade dinner and movie but at the rate we were getting everything moved in it might not turn out that way. “Man, you own a lot of crap," Bowie said making his way through the door with the box springs. Ace was on the other end, but he had been uncharacteristically quiet today. I need to touch base with him and make sure everything was okay.
A few hours later and we had finally managed to get everything moved in and arranged. I started up my grill and laid some fish out for it, while I was making a salad that Creed had told me Londynn loved I saw Ace coming from the restroom. My other brothers had left already which I was thankful for since I needed to check on Ace. “Hey man, you doing okay?” He just shrugs in response. “Come on, come talk to me.”
“It’s Kynlee.”
“What about her?” I ask him.
“She told me she loved me the other night," he tells me, but I know there’s more to the story than that.
“And?”
“And I started an argument with her which caused her to storm out and we haven’t spoken since.” He tells me looking as guilty as ever.
“How long ago?”
“Three days," he replies.
“Three days! Three days and you haven’t talked to your girlfriend after she told you she loved you?” I exclaim.
Ace runs a hand over the back of his hair. “She isn’t my girlfriend!”
“The hell she’s not! Kynlee is your girlfriend rather you admit or not but if you ask me you’re lucky that a girl like that even puts up with a guy like you.” I tell him pointing the knife I’m using to cut up vegetables at him.
Ace glares at me. “Well I didn’t ask you and what the hell do you guy like me?”
I sigh, lay the knife down and level Ace with my own glare. “I mean you’re a good guy and she obviously sees that but you’re an ass Ace. You don’t put her first in your decision, you don’t consider her feelings and you flirt with every girl you see. I’m surprised she’s stayed around this long.”
“So basically, I’m you pre-Londynn.”
I think about the guy I was between Harlyn and Londynn and he’s right. I was totally the guy I just described with one exception I didn’t have a girlfriend. “You’re right I was that guy, but I didn’t have a girlfriend to be concerned about…you do. We were raised better than this Ace. Come on mom and dad would hate the way you’re acting and the way you treat her.”
“Don’t! Don’t you dare bring them into this, especially mom!” Ace bellows at me.
I stand there for a minute studying my younger brother and I notice the pain he usually hides so well. He’s terrified right now, and I think I know why. “Ace, what happened to our parents was horrible. Dad having to lose mom was probably the hardest thing he ever did but you know what? I’m pretty sure they would have done it all the same if they’d had the chance. And just because you run the risk of getting hurt or losing someone doesn’t mean you can’t fall in love. Besides who’s to say that Kynlee isn’t your long term?”
“Are you kidding me? Were the James brothers, it’s in our DNA for relationship to suck or end or hurt like hell. Look at Dad and mom, Bowie and Hollis, you and Harlyn! Even Axell and Sadie aren’t so good anymore. We are doomed to lose when it comes to love. You’ll lose Londynn in some way too, mark my words Jagger. Guys like us don’t get to keep love. We just get it long enough to give us a slow death.” With that Ace grabbed his keys and marched out of my loft without a glance back at me.
His words hung in the air, making it seem like it was hard to breathe. I didn’t want to believe him, but in a way, he seemed right. What if it was just a matter of time before I lost Londynn? How would I survive that again? My phone goes off and I look at the screen and see it’s from Londynn “See you in a few.”
I lay my phone down and quickly head upstairs to shower. While in the shower I decide the Ace is wrong and that Londynn and I will prove him wrong. Then I start to worry about his comment concerning Axell and Sadie. I had noticed that things seemed different between them, but I didn’t think it was that bad. I mean they had been together for so long now it just didn’t seem right if they weren’t together. As I’m getting dressed I hear the doorbell. I quickly button up my shirt while taking the stairs two at a time.
Chapter 26
Londynn
I had found the cutest dress while working at the boutique the day before my actual date with Jagger. I tried to resist the urge to buy it but at the end of the shift I had purchased it. Now, I stood in front of my full-length mirror and admired the cobalt blue and cranberry pinstripe dress. I slipped on a pair of my nude heels and a cranberry cardigan. After work I had rushed home just to curl my hair and touch up my makeup. I don’t know why but I felt nervous, I mean we had technically been together for a little over a month now.
I had to shake my head at how silly I was acting. On my way out of my bedroom door I grabbed my perfume for a quick spray then head to my car. When I pull in front of Jagger’s place my butterflies turn to bats. I stand staring at his door, taking deep breaths to calm crazy nerves and finally I press the doorbell. A minute later Jagger appears look as gorgeous as ever. His hair is perfect messy, his beard neatly trimmed, his gray jeans hung off his hips just right and his white button up shirt hugged all of his muscles. He had a few of the buttons undone which showed just enough of his tan skin that I felt a blush creep up into my cheeks.
“Wow!” Is his only response as his eyes travel up and down my body.
My blush only deepens, and I release a small, nervous giggle. “I could say the same thing.”
Shaking his head he says “Not possible. There’s no way I look as good as you do.” He reaches out and pulls me into his arms and tilts my head back with his thumb and kisses me quickly on the lips. He reaches behind me and shuts the door.
I notice the place looks and smells amazing. All of his furniture is brown leather with gray accents. The lighting is dim but romantic and whatever he’s cooking as filled the area and made my stomach growl. “The place looks so great Jagger. I wish I could have helped you move in today.”
He brushes a lose strand of hair from my face “I know but you had to work. Speaking of how was work today?”
“It went great! I really like it there," I explain as he leads me to the small fenced in patio where he’s grilling some salmon. “Are you grilling salmon?”
“Yes, I am," he says, and I see that smirk I love come across his face.
I study him while he turns them over. “That’s my favorite.”
“I know.” I must have given him a shocked look because his look of seriousness fell, and he laughed. “I remember from our firs
t date.”
“Oh!” I say laughing. “That makes sense.”
“However, in my defense this is my first time making any of this so if it sucks please lie to me. I don’t think my ego could take any less.”
I throw my head back in laughter. “I’m sure your ego will be just fine.” After we eat were lying on the couch, well more like cuddling when I ask him. “What are your favorites?”
“What do you mean?” He asks, and I hear the confusion in his voice.
“Your favorites. You know, favorite color, favorite food, favorite drink, favorite movie, I already know your favorite song but stuff like that.” I sit up so I can see him.
He bites his bottom lip for a minute then clears his throat. “My favorite color is blue, my favorite food is fajitas, favorite drink is cherry Pepsi, favorite movie is Rebel without a Cause, does that answer all of them?”
I shake my head “Not even close but it’s a start.”
He sits up and runs his thumb over my jaw line “You know I have a lot of new favorites.”
“Do you?” I ask trying to sound like I’m teasing instead of a breathless mess. Just the simple touch of him thumb has my stomach doing flips and my heart about to beat out of my chest.
He leans closer to me and his voice drops into a husky whisper “Yes, like I love the smell of flowers, daisies in particular. Coconut has become my favorite flavor. I really like little red fancy cars. Seeing the blush creep across your cheeks. Those long legs that go on for days. I even love Kings of Leon," I start laughing because I can’t actually picture Jagger listening to them. He’s so 80’s hair bands but I love that he loves them. He kisses each of cheeks then my nose and finally my lips. When he pulls away he tells me “But my new favorite thing in the world is the sound of your laughter.” His hands fly to my sides and him tickling me mercilessly. My laughter is filling the small apartment. I fall back on the couch with the idea that I might could escape but instead he follows. I’m no pinned with no hope of escaping. Tears form in my eyes, my sides are achy and I can’t breathe from laughing so hard. Suddenly Jagger stop and looks me dead in the eyes “That is my favorite.”
Pedal to the Metal (James Brothers Series Book 1) Page 20
