‘Fel-Fel! Either you need to levitate SLOWER or you need to give me a lift. I feel like my feet are going to fall off.’
‘Oh dear,’ said Felicity Bat mockingly. ‘If your feet fell off, where would you put your shoes?’
‘Probably on my ears,’ Aggie Hoof said. ‘Like they do in Shoeland.’
Felicity Bat clenched her fists, ready to argue that there WAS NO SHOELAND. But something distracted her. A fairy shot out of one of the caravans hanging on a nearby tree.
‘YOU!’ Felicity Bat shouted, pointing at the fairy.
‘Oh, um … I …’ Crispy sighed. She slowly sidestepped in the air, trying to sneak back into her caravan.
Her caravan was the most bashed up of them all – many of them were perfect, with shiny doors and little plant pots outside. Crispy’s looked like it had been stood on. The windows were broken and the door was hanging off its hinges.
‘I need you to do one more thing for me,’ Felicity Bat said.
Crispy sighed. ‘No. I already found Tiga. And I’m not your personal fairy.’
Felicity Bat flicked her finger and Crispy crashed to the ground.
She winced and rubbed her elbow. ‘Mean,’ she grumbled.
Felicity Bat nodded at Crispy’s caravan.
‘No!’ Crispy cried, shooting into the air. ‘Please, Felicity.’
But it was too late. The caravan twisted and turned and before Crispy could say ‘FROGLUMPS!’ the caravan was sparkling new. It had a glittery door and some beautiful frilly curtains, and it was so shiny and bright that all the fairies who were peeking out of their caravans had to put on sunglasses.
‘What have you done?!’ Crispy cried. ‘You MONSTER!’
‘Shall I add some pretty flowers too?’ Felicity Bat asked.
Crispy shook her head frantically. ‘No, no, please stop. I’ll do anything. ANYTHING!’
Felicity Bat snaked towards her and said quietly, ‘You will go to the Mmmf and look through all the files. Every. Single. One. You are looking for any document that mentions witches named Tiga. Any Tigas who might be about nine years old now.’
‘Like Tiga Whicabim?’ Crispy asked.
‘Forget the surname,’ Felicity Bat said with a smile. ‘Just look for witches called Tiga.’
26
Following Miss Flint
Back at the Docks, Tiga and Fluffanora noticed that every witch was – somewhat reluctantly – dressed like an idiot.
‘It’s the fashion in the faraway Shoeland, wherever that is, and we have to wear it because Aggie Hoof said so,’ a witch grumbled as she adjusted the socks on her ears.
Fluffanora laughed and strapped her hat to her waist, took off a shoe and dangled it on her ear, and pulled her skirt up around her neck.
‘What?’ she said, smiling at Tiga. ‘We’d better wear the Shoeland fashions, it’s the law.’
Tiga flicked her finger and her tights shot off her legs and landed on her head. ‘Happy?’ she asked Fluffanora through gritted teeth.
Fluffanora roared with laughter.
‘As much as I would very much like to play a vital part in this plan of yours, I’m afraid I will have to leave you for a bit as I need to film Cooking for Tiny People. I just cannot let my fans down. There would UPROAR!’ Fran prattled on.
Tiga nodded. ‘We understand, Fran.’
‘I shall be back as soon as I can!’ she cried, shooting off down the road.
‘NO RUSH!’ Fluffanora shouted after her.
Their plan was to follow Miss Flint’s every move and look out for anything unusual, anything that might give them a clue to Peggy’s whereabouts. It was Thursday lunchtime, and just like the old witch had said, Miss Flint was in Nibblers, eating an Old Bat wrap. Her cat – the scrawniest, evilest thing Tiga had ever clamped her eyes on – was standing stiffly by her leg …
Four hours later, Tiga yawned as they sat curled up outside the shop, peering in the window at Miss Flint stuffing eyeballs back on the dolls, or chopping their hair, or sticking on toes. The dim light in the window glowed half-heartedly, as the shadows of dolls danced about inside, along with a gigantic shadow of Miss Flint and her crooked old nose.
‘She’s just carrying on as normal,’ Tiga whispered to Fluffanora, who looked really disappointed.
‘Maybe she has nothing to do with it,’ said Fluffanora. ‘Maybe Peggy just wanted to buy a doll from her, Tiga.’
That evening, Miss Flint closed up her shop and took the sixteen steps back to her house, accompanied by Fuzzscrumple.
Tiga and Fluffanora waited around the corner and picked at some sandwiches they’d bought from Nibblers.
‘I actually don’t mind this,’ Fluffanora said. ‘What’s this green stuff?’
‘Mould,’ said Tiga.
‘BLEUGH!’ said Fluffanora, spitting it out.
Tiga peeked around the corner and down the main street in the Docks. Peggy had done such a good job of making it better. The shoe houses looked brilliant.
‘WE ARE HERE TO TAKE YOUR SHOE HOUSES!’ a very familiar voice yelled.
‘It’s not … is it?’ Fluffanora asked.
Tiga watched as Aggie Hoof and a levitating Felicity Bat glided down the Docks, flicking their fingers and making the shoe houses disappear.
‘But that’s my home!’ a witch cried, as her shoe house vanished and all her things – sofas, bookshelves, curtains – landed with a thud on top of her.
‘I hope my cat didn’t disappear too!’ another cried.
‘It did,’ said Felicity Bat with a smirk.
‘Quick,’ Tiga whispered. ‘We need to move.’
Felicity Bat was levitating dangerously close to the corner where Tiga and Fluffanora were hiding. She paused and sniffed the air.
‘Quick,’ Tiga hissed, grabbing Fluffanora’s arm.
They dived into the closest door to them, and fell straight into something awful.
Tiga bobbed up and down in the gloopy liquid.
‘This is where all the mouldy jam goes to be made into cat food,’ Tiga said flatly. She placed a hand over Fluffanora’s face so Felicity Bat couldn’t hear the scream.
27
Suspicious …
A couple more hours passed and still nothing. Felicity Bat and Aggie Hoof, after destroying all the great shoe houses Peggy had made, had retreated to Linden House. Tiga was almost asleep by the time Miss Flint’s front door creaked open, and just like the witch at the coves had said she would, Miss Flint marched out of the Docks and straight towards Ritzy City, disguised in a big hat and a pair of glasses.
Tiga and Fluffanora scuttled along behind her, at enough of a distance not to arouse suspicion. At one point Miss Flint looked around and stared at them. They were still fairly covered in mouldy jam, only now it had hardened a bit, so they looked like witches coated in some sort of horrendous crust. Fluffanora put on her Shoeland accent and said to Tiga, ‘I am very excited to visit Ritzy City for the first time. Oh yes. Also, did you know it is bad luck to look backwards? Terrible things can happen to you and your shop.’
Miss Flint’s eyes widened and she quickly turned around. She was clearly as superstitious as the cove witch had said …
When they got to Ritzy City, Miss Flint went straight to Cakes, Pies and That’s About It, Really and got a tart. Tiga and Fluffanora waited outside, they decided it was better than going in, in case they bumped into anyone they knew. Cakes, Pies and That’s About It, Really had become one of Tiga’s favourite places to hang out in Ritzy City.
Miss Flint polished off her tart.
‘She’s coming,’ Fluffanora hissed. Tiga straightened up and pretended to be chatting with Fluffanora as the old bat stomped past.
But she didn’t stomp back to the Docks, like the witch in the coves had said she would. They followed her in amazement as she went somewhere else entirely …
‘Linden House?!’ Tiga cried.
28
The Bag
Miss Flint was greeted at the door of Lin
den House by Aggie Hoof, who gave her a massive sack of something. Felicity Bat peeked out of the door and looked around nervously like a witch doing something naughty.
‘Be here at the same time tomorrow, same thing, Miss Flint,’ she said. Miss Flint nodded and off she went.
‘Same time tomorrow,’ Tiga repeated. ‘Same thing …’
Just as Tiga and Fluffanora were about to follow Miss Flint back to the Docks, Tiga spotted something crazy.
‘Is that …?’ she said, pointing at a huge pile of papers flying wonkily down the street.
The pile of papers came to a halt next to Felicity Bat and landed with a thud at her feet. That’s when Tiga saw what had been carrying them – a ridiculously dusty Crispy.
‘Where has she been?!’ Fran cried, appearing with a pop beside them.
‘Shhh,’ Tiga said, stepping back into the shadows as Crispy, Felicity Bat and Aggie Hoof looked suspiciously across the road.
‘She’s covered in dust! And not the glittery, wonderful kind!’ Fran prattled on.
‘Perfect,’ they heard Felicity Bat say as she flicked through the papers.
‘Can I go now?’ Crispy asked, shaking the dust out of her hair.
Felicity Bat nodded. ‘Yes. Excellent work, my little fairy.’
Crispy growled and shot off down the road.
29
Fluffanora’s Shoe
Tiga and Fluffanora followed Miss Flint all the way back to her house, but she slammed her door before they could get close enough to the bag to even guess what was in it.
They slept in Fluffanora’s shoe that night, just on the outskirts of the Docks. It was the fanciest shoe Tiga had ever slept in. It had ten floors and lots of winding corridors. Tiga got lost about five times. It even had a little room in it that was a smaller version of Clutterbucks.
As they had a Clutterbucks, they curled up on their floating chairs and tried to make a plan.
‘What do you think those dusty old papers were?’ Tiga asked.
Fluffanora shrugged. ‘Probably more ideas for evil rule changes. Who cares? We need to stay focused on our mission: find out what was in that bag Felicity handed Miss Flint.’
‘Yes, I suppose that’s all we can do …’ Tiga said. She was distracted. Peggy had been missing for a really long time now. What if she wasn’t OK? What if, like Eddy Eggby, she vanished for ever? What if the Queen had eaten her?
‘In a few hours, when she’s definitely asleep, we’ll sneak into Miss Flint’s house and find out what’s in the bag,’ Fluffanora said, raising her glass.
Tiga clinked her glass against it and looked at the empty seat hovering at their table.
She missed Peggy a lot.
Fran zoomed into the room and plonked herself down on the empty chair. ‘Well, thank you very much for waiting for me! I’ve been zooming around corridor after corridor looking for you. Oooh Clutterbucks! I’ll have one of their new Peggy Pigwiggle punch drinks, please!’
Tiga glared at her.
‘What?’ Fran said. ‘I’m sure wherever Peggy is, she’s delighted I’m drinking it.’
30
Felicity Bat Figures it Out
‘I’ve found her!’ Felicity Bat said with a cackle. ‘I was right, her surname isn’t Whicabim at all. Not even close.’
‘You’re brilliant, Fel-Fel,’ said Aggie Hoof.
Felicity Bat bowed. ‘I now know exactly where Tiga comes from. And I know who her mum is.’
‘Oooh, is it the old cart witch lady?’ Aggie Hoof guessed.
‘No,’ said Felicity Bat.
‘Is it Miss Flint?’
‘No,’ said Felicity Bat.
‘Is it … you, Fel-Fel?’
Felicity Bat sighed. ‘I am NINE.’
Aggie Hoof thought for a moment. ‘It’s not me, is it?’
31
Inside Miss Flint’s House
‘It’s not here!’ Fluffanora hissed.
Tiga held a shaky finger up to her lips and with her other hand pointed frantically at a snoring and snorting Miss Flint.
They had managed to get into her house – through Fuzzscrumple’s far-too-large cat door. Fran was downstairs in the kitchen distracting the grumpy old cat. He was jumping around pathetically on his frail, bony legs, trying to swat at her.
‘Ha! You missed!’ Fran said gleefully, as Fuzzscrumple nearly took out one of her eyes with his claw.
Miss Flint’s house was as ramshackle as her shop. And it was also filled with dolls. They lined the edges of her bedroom, hung off the top of her wardrobe and slumped next to the table by her bed. Tiga stared at them. Their matted hair was caked in dust, their little dresses were peppered with holes, and their faces had a look that said, ‘This is gross, isn’t it?’ Miss Flint’s beloved dress was hanging on the wardrobe door.
Tiga and Fluffanora crept around the room, slowly lifting up dusty dolls and peering in half-open battered drawers.
Miss Flint rolled over and grunted.
They hit the floor!
And that’s when Tiga saw it, sticking out from under the bed. She pointed madly at the bag. Fluffanora grinned.
Tiga tried to reach it, but Miss Flint snorted again, and this time rolled over, her wrinkly old arm flopping forward, blocking the bag.
Tiga tried to edge closer but Fluffanora pulled at her skirt. She shook her head and pointed at Tiga’s finger.
Tiga looked blankly at Fluffanora.
‘Use magic, you idiot,’ she whispered.
Tiga stared at her finger and then at the bag. Fluffanora was right, she did have magic, it’s just she wasn’t sure it was good enough. What if she accidentally did some ridiculous spell and woke Miss Flint up?
Fluffanora prodded her.
Miss Flint snored.
Tiga thought for a moment. What spell to use … ‘Ah-ha,’ she whispered. ‘I know which one to do …’
It was an old spell Mrs Brew had taught her when she was trying to reach a book on the very top shelf of Mrs Brew’s library in their house on the Cauldron Islands. ‘You can do many things to get it,’ she’d told Tiga. ‘You can bewitch that ladder over there to grow bigger, or you can do a simple spell to move the book towards you.’
Tiga pointed her finger and mumbled the words Mrs Brew had taught her.
Cats and frogs and rats with beards
Brooms and capes and, um, things called feards
Make this thing work.
Tiga stared at the bag.
Fluffanora had her head in her hands. The bag wasn’t moving, but something else was. Miss Flint’s arm began to wobble. Just a little at first, but before long it was wobbling like a petrified jelly. Bigger it grew, and fatter, until it was more than double the size of Miss Flint’s body. A gigantic finger, almost as tall as Tiga, flopped in front of Fluffanora.
‘Uh oh,’ Tiga whispered. ‘I think that was the spell for making the ladder bigger. What I meant to say was, Come to me my pretty.’
The bag shot out from under the bed and straight into Tiga’s hand.
Fluffanora, still covering her face with one hand, flicked her finger and Miss Flint’s arm started to shrink back down to its normal size.
Tiga peered eagerly inside the bag.
Fluffanora mouthed, ‘What’s inside?’
Tiga reach a hand in. Then another. Then she stuck her whole head in because something was very wrong.
‘It’s completely empty!’ she hissed.
Fluffanora grabbed the bag and peered inside. It was indeed completely empty.
Miss Flint snorted and rolled over again.
Tiga peered under the bed. About fifty identical bags were under there. She hastily crawled under and started rifling through them all. They were all completely empty!
‘They’re empty. What now?’ Tiga whispered to Fluffanora from under the bed. She wiped her palms on her skirt – they were all sweaty and scared.
Fluffanora got up and tiptoed towards the door. ‘Let’s go, there’s nothing here that ca
n help us.’
But Tiga spotted something. ‘Fluffanora,’ she whispered, ‘the dress.’
Fluffanora stared at it and mouthed, ‘What about it?’
Tiga got to her feet, scuttled over to the wardrobe and gently slipped the dress off its hanger.
Fluffanora stared from Tiga to Miss Flint and back again. ‘Huh?’ she whispered.
Tiga didn’t have time to explain. ‘It’s her beloved lucky dress.’
She shot out of the bedroom and down the stairs, found a piece of paper and scribbled,
If you ever want to see your beloved dress again, come to Pearl Peak at 7 p.m. tomorrow. Meet me by the rollercoaster and don’t be late.
32
The Dress Plan
It was a brilliant plan, if Tiga did say so herself. And she did, about seventy-six times the next day.
Miss Flint would find her dress missing in the morning and, if the witch at the coves was right, she would panic – it was her special dress and she was terrified of losing it. She would then find the note and set off to Pearl Peak to get the dress back at 7 p.m. That would buy Tiga and Fluffanora plenty of time to sneak into her house once more through Fuzzscrumple’s cat door and get her shoes, hat and big glasses. Tiga would put the disguise on, along with the dress, and go to Linden House and pick up the bag herself.
‘FUZZSCRUMPLE, YOU COMPLETE PAIN!’ Fluffanora roared as she wrestled with the cat on the kitchen floor.
Tiga slipped her feet into Miss Flint’s heels and wobbled about a bit. She stomped up and down the room getting her balance. She added the hat and the glasses and she was ready to go!
Tiga marched into the kitchen and Fuzzscrumple immediately detached herself from Fluffanora’s face, scuttled up to Tiga and lovingly rubbed against her leg.
‘Well, we fooled the old cat,’ Tiga said with a smile.
Fluffanora grinned.
‘Evening Miss Flint,’ Aggie Hoof said to Tiga.
Witch Switch Page 7
