by Kiki Swinson
After Kevin left to do his time, I fell in love with Matt. He was much older so my attraction for him grew much faster. He was a petty thief like Kevin. Matt was a drug dealer making major moves in the streets and everyone knew him. He was the man. And being with a man made me feel good about myself. It made me feel like I was the woman. His main chick. But look at me now. If I would’ve gotten with Kevin’s brother, I probably wouldn’t have been in any of this mess. Yeah, we would’ve been living off a security guard’s salary, but I’d probably have a lot of peace. You can’t put a price on that. But hey, I didn’t go that route, so now I had to clean up my mess before things got any worse.
I just hoped that guy didn’t get on the phone and call Kevin and tell him he saw me. Or call someone else who knew I was on the run. I just prayed to God that he didn’t. Hopefully, he’d buy my story that I wasn’t who he thought I was. If not, then I’d be shit out of luck!
The window in the hotel room had a front and side view of the parking lot. As long as everyone who came to the hotel drove into the parking lot from this angle, I’d be able to see them. If they came from the opposite direction, then I could get blindsided. So again, this all boiled down to the security guard and if he’d open his mouth. Besides praying, I knew I needed to keep my fingers crossed. Having an escape plan to get out of this hotel if someone came looking for me would be in my best interest too. Time would tell, though.
7
CHECKING OUT THE SCENERY
The very next morning my body felt a lot better from the ibuprofen I had taken the night before, so it wasn’t hard for me to get up, shower, and dress. I knew I had to go out on the streets and do some surveillance work that day, so I picked up the hotel phone and called a cab. Besides killing Matt and anyone who got in my way, finding my baby was all I could think about.
The cab arrived at the hotel less than fifteen minutes later. The driver was an older black man with long dreadlocks. He looked like he was in his fifties. There was no doubt in my mind that he was a Rasta. He didn’t have a West Indian accent but he dressed the part with the dreadlock hair covering the green, black, and red jacket. The long-ass hair growing from his beard looked disgusting as hell. I couldn’t deal with a man with all that hair on his head and all over his face. That’s not attractive to me. He even had a mild body odor. I let down the back window a bit just so the air could circulate. He greeted me as soon as I sat down in the backseat and asked me where I was headed. “How much would you charge me to run me around to a couple of places?” I asked him boldly.
“Are we staying in the area?”
“Yeah.”
“Where exactly do you want to go?”
“I need to ride through a couple spots in Norfolk. Huntersville is the first place I wanna go and then I’m gonna need to check out a few places in Park Place.”
“Where in Huntersville you trying to go?”
“Lexington Avenue and B Avenue.”
“You ain’t going out there to buy drugs, are you?”
“Of course not. Do I look like I’m on drugs?” I replied sarcastically.
“You can never tell these days,” he commented, and then he said, “So, where are we headed to after that?”
“I just want you to ride down West Thirty-Seventh Street and then I’m done. So tell me how much is that gonna cost me.”
The cabdriver thought for a moment. I could see the dollar signs circling around in his head. “I’ll tell you what, give me a hundred dollars,” he finally said.
“Come on now, a hundred dollars is a lot. You’re gonna have to come at me a little better than that,” I barked. I knew he was trying to get one over on me.
“Okay, give me seventy-five dollars and you’ve got yourself a driver.”
I thought about his offer for a second and then I said, “Okay.”
The driver held his hand out for me to pay him. I looked at him like he’d lost his damn mind. “I’m not paying you up front,” I huffed. “I’ll give you half now and half when we get back to the hotel.”
“Deal!” he said. So I pulled forty from my purse and handed to him. Immediately after he put the money in his pocket he turned on his meter and pulled out of the hotel parking lot.
“Wait, I thought I was paying you a flat fee?” I asked.
“You are. But I’m still required to monitor my mileage and fares. So, you’re good,” he explained.
“All right,” I replied, and then I laid my head back on the headrest.
“What’s your name?” he asked as he pulled his car onto Military Highway.
“Chantel,” I told him.
“Hi, Chantel, my name is Sam. You from around here?” he questioned me again. I knew this was about to be a long and drawn out Q & A session so I mentally prepared myself to go with the floor.
“No, I’m not from around here. I’m just here visiting.” My web of lies continued.
“You must be here visiting your man,” he indirectly asked.
I gave him a half smile. “Something like that,” I said, and then I looked out the back window at the passing traffic.
“Does he know you’re here?”
“Yeah, he knows.”
“So, why isn’t he with you now?”
“It’s kind of complicated,” I answered while I kept my attention on the cars we passed by.
“I hope you ain’t mixed up in no love triangle. You’re too pretty to be playing second base.”
I let out a long sigh. “I know, I know,” I replied, playing the role of a side chick.
“So, where you from?”
“New York.”
“I knew I heard a Northern accent in there somewhere.”
I smiled.
“So, how long have you been in this love triangle?”
“A little over a year now.”
“Does the other woman know about you?”
“I’m sure she does. What woman doesn’t know when her man is cheating? I mean, it’s not like y’all are the best liars. All you have to do is change your routine a few times and there’s your evidence,” I schooled him.
“That’s not all the way true. See, the men you’re talking about don’t know how to be a player. Now if you were my old lady, I’d treat you so good that you wouldn’t be thinking about if I’m messing around on you. The young guys these days don’t know how to handle their business. And that’s why they get caught with their pants down.”
I chuckled. “So, you’re a pimp, huh?” I joked.
“Nah, I ain’t no pimp. But I do know how to handle my women.”
“Are you married?”
“Yep. Been married twenty years.”
“So what’s your secret?” I inquired, thinking about how Derek and I could’ve lasted twenty years if he was still alive. But Matt took him away from me and he would pay for it.
“Let’s just say that she knows her place and I know mine.”
“That doesn’t sound hard to do.”
“It’s not. But a lot of people aren’t able to do it.”
“You’re right,” I commented, and peered back out of the side window. I couldn’t get my mind off what could’ve been if Derek was still alive. Anger and rage began to mount up inside of me like never before. The hurt I was feeling began to spread through my entire body. It would bring me sweet satisfaction to kill Matt with my bare hands. I wanted him to suffer the same way he made my husband suffer, maybe even worse. Tears started welling up in my eyes. I tried to hold it back but I couldn’t. And before I knew it, the floodgates opened and tears streamed down my face. I wiped them away with the backs of my hands, but that didn’t help. The tears kept coming. “Are you okay?” the cabdriver asked me as he looked at me through this rearview mirror. I used my hands to wipe away the constant flow of tears falling from my eyes and then I lied, saying, “Yes, I’m fine.”
The cabdriver pressed the issue. “Are you sure? Because you’re crying up a storm back there.”
“I’m just going through so
mething right now. I’ll be all right,” I told him while I continued to wipe the tears away from my eyes and face.
“If you wanna talk about it, I can lend you my ears.”
“No, I’m good.”
The cabdriver took his eyes off the rearview mirror and put them on the road before him. He made a couple left turns and made a right turn and we were finally at our destination. “We’re on Lexington Avenue. Is there anywhere you would like for me to park?” he asked me.
“No, just ride by the gray house on the right,” I instructed.
I slid down in the backseat so I wouldn’t be noticed around the scene. All I needed was for Matt or one of his street snitches to see me pulling up, because I’d be screwed. I felt the cabdriver slow the car down in front of a two-story house covered in dark gray vinyl siding where Matt hung out to gamble. No one knew about this spot but a handful of people. Not even the cops knew about it. This spot was run by his cousin Otis. Otis was an old-school cat who was in his late forties. He was always known to be a street hustler, whether it was selling weed, selling shots of liquor, or running a gambling spot. He never sold anything that would give him a lot of time in prison. He also ruled with an iron fist. No one ever tried to rob him nor had anyone ever called the cops on him. He was well respected in this area, to say the least.
The cabdriver did as I told him and drove by Matt’s cousin’s gambling spot without looking suspicious. There were only a couple of cars parked outside. Otis’s Cadillac Escalade was parked in the driveway and I also saw a dark blue F-150, along with a silver Chevy Tahoe. I had no idea who those other trucks belonged to, but I knew they weren’t anything that Matt would be in because none of the windows were tinted. Matt never rode around in a car without tint on the windows. He liked to move around undetected. And he’d never compromised that rule.
“Do you wanna head to A Avenue now?” the cabdriver asked me.
“Yeah, let’s go,” I told him as I sat back up in the backseat.
My mind started racing while en route to A Avenue. Where in the hell was this asshole at? Did he come back to Virginia? And if so, where could he be?
“I’m about to turn onto A Avenue,” the driver announced. So I slid back down into the seat, lifting my head up just enough so I could see all the movement on this block.
“Slow down as we pass that brick duplex on the left,” I said.
“Are you sure? I mean, there’s a lot of people standing outside of it.”
“I know. But they can’t see me. I just need to see who they are, that’s all.”
“As you wish,” he replied as he pressed down on this brakes and looked forward.
The blood through my veins started pumping and the hair on my arms started standing up when I looked into all the faces of the people who stood around on the porch of the duplex. There were a total of four guys and a woman. Right off the bat, I knew that three of those guys were street dealers and the other guy and lady were junkies. I watched how the female junkie handed one of the dope boys her money and he gave her something white in exchange for it. Immediately after she got what she wanted, the male and female junkie walked off. By this time, the cabdriver had gotten within a few feet of the three guys so I was able to get a bird’s-eye view of their faces. But after I looked at them, I realized that I didn’t know any of them. They must’ve been new to this spot as I had never seen their faces before. I let out a loud sigh of frustration as I turned and faced the back of the cabdriver’s head.
But then I saw movement through my peripheral vision, so I yanked my head back into that direction, and that’s when I saw a familiar face. The nerves in my stomach started rumbling. I swear, I couldn’t believe my fucking eyes when I realized that this was the same guy who Matt had sent to pick the money up from me at Grand Central Station. He had just walked out of the door of the duplex and got the attention of all three guys standing out front. I watched him talk to them as I stared out the back window, and I figured that if he was in fact back in Virginia, then so was Matt. At this very moment, I wanted to jump out of the fucking cab and bust a couple shots at his ass. I wanted to kill him on the spot but I knew I was outnumbered. I also knew that would be a dumb move on my part. I needed to find out where Matt was. So I needed to be smart about everything I did.
I stared at the guy until I was no longer able to see him. The cabdriver drove for about a half a block up Church Street before I told him to stop the car. “Pull over for a minute,” I instructed him.
He did as I said and pulled into the parking lot of a warehouse that looked abandoned. I got out of the car and took a short walk away from the cab. I started crying instantly and began to swing my fists in the air like I was in a brawl. I thought the cabdriver would intervene and try to stop me but he didn’t. I wasn’t sure how long it took me to go through my meltdown, but when it was over I got back into the cab and asked him to take me back to the hotel.
“Are you sure? I thought you wanted to go to Park Place?”
“No, I’ve seen all I needed to see. Take me back to my hotel,” I snapped. He knew my mood had changed. He knew I saw something that got me upset. I wasn’t the nice lady anymore. I was more irritated now than anything.
“As you wish,” he said, and turned his cab around and headed back in the direction of the hotel.
Before I got out of the cab the old driver handed me his business card and told me to call him anytime I needed to get around. I assured him I would as I shoved his card into my purse. When I turned to walk about he said, “I don’t know what you saw today that made you so mad. But whatever it was, don’t let it consume you. If you do then you’re allowing that thing or person to have power over you. And that’s not good.”
“It’s far deeper than you could ever imagine, sir,” I assured him, and then I walked away from the cab.
8
TIME TO REGROUP
I thought I’d be able to go back to the hotel and get a clear head so I could figure out my next move, but I couldn’t. My mind wouldn’t let me focus. For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out my next step because all I wanted to do was see that guy’s face bloody. Fuck all the politics! I wanted that motherfucker dead right then! He was one of Matt’s flunkies! He took my money from me and in exchange I didn’t get shit. So he would get dealt with. He would feel my fucking pain.
I can’t tell you how many times I paced the floor in my hotel room, but I can say that when my cell phone rang it stopped me in my tracks. I rushed over to my purse and grabbed it from inside. I looked down at the caller ID and saw that it was the college kid I’d met on the bus. “Hello,” I spoke after I pressed the send button.
“You up?”
“Of course I’m up.”
“Have you seen your family yet?”
“No, not yet.”
“Have you even left the hotel yet?”
“What’s up with you asking all these damn questions?” I spat. I was not in the mood for his shit. Not right now.
“Because me and my roommate don’t have class today and we wanna take you to get something to eat and hang out.”
“I’m not in the mood to eat anything right now,” I told him.
“What’s wrong?”
“I just got a lot on my mind.”
“Well, I’ll tell you what, if you come and hang out with us, my roommate and I will help you take your mind off your problems.”
“Nah, I don’t think so,” I replied in a nonchalant manner.
“Ahh, come on now. It’ll be fun.”
I thought for a moment before I answered him. What were the odds of him and his friend helping me to relieve some of this stress I had? I was dealing with some serious shit. My husband was dead and my baby boy was missing. Now how in the hell were they going to help ease that kind of pain? “Look, let me take a rain check,” I finally told him.
“No, Chantel, we are not taking no for an answer so get your butt up,” he replied, pressing the issue.
“Okay, I’ll
tell you what. I’ll hang out with you guys for a couple of hours and that’s it,” I said, thinking about how I could use them to spy on that spot in Huntersville. I figured if that guy was there, then Matt couldn’t be far.
“Cool, be ready in an hour and we’ll be right over,” he told me.
“All right,” I said, and disconnected the call. I thought for a moment about the level of persistence Quincy had when he was persuading me to hang out him and his friend Trevor. He was giving me the impression that he was developing a crush on me. I hoped he wasn’t crushing on me because I didn’t have the time to deal with being hit on. But I wouldn’t mind using his interest to get him to help me with my search.
* * *
Quincy called my cell phone after he and Trevor had pulled up in front of the hotel. I told them I’d be down in a few minutes. I grabbed my gun from underneath the pillow on the bed, stuffed it inside my purse, and walked out of the room.
The sun had just set, but the moment the double doors slid open and I walked through them, I could see both guys’ faces light up like I was the fucking Queen of England. Quincy got out of the passenger seat and held the door open for me. “No, I’ll prefer to sit in the back,” I told him.
“A’ight,” he said, and turned around and opened up the back door. After I got inside he closed the door behind me and hopped back in the front passenger seat.
Trevor greeted me with a smile and said, “Hello.”
