by Cas Peace
The healer kept her voice soft. “I thought I heard you call me.”
The woman at her side turned from her contemplation of the grazing warhorse. “I did.”
“How was I able to hear you?” This speaking and hearing without words was new to Rienne.
Sullyan flicked a glance at her and Rienne had a sudden impression of great sadness before the Major schooled her expression.
“First, it has to do with your being an empath. And then with how you helped me when you removed the spellsilver.”
“I still don’t understand that,” said Rienne. “I don’t know how it happened. I could somehow see what Robin was trying to do, and I knew he was going about it the wrong way. I was getting so frustrated and I just wanted to shove him aside and help you. I guess that’s just what I did.”
“Poor Robin,” murmured Sullyan. “He tries so hard, but despite my teaching, he still sometimes fails to understand.”
Rienne knew how he felt. “Why did you call me?”
Sullyan shook herself and looked up with a more normal expression. “I need your medical skills, if you will. We are not safe here, and I must be able to travel. Your healing last night accomplished much and the flesh you stitched has knitted. I need you to remove the sutures.”
Rienne smiled. “Of course. Where shall we go?”
Sullyan led her into the barn. The morning light shone full through the door, illuminating the hay bales lying on the ground. Easing herself onto one, Sullyan removed her shirt. Rienne unwound the bandages she had used to support the broken ribs, seeing that the whip cuts on the Major’s back had already faded to pink lines.
Deftly, she slipped out the sutures. Sullyan’s skin was sleek, her back defined by muscle honed with weapons training. It was marked here and there with the faint, white lines of other, older scars, but also by ribs and spine made prominent by her recent starvation. She stood before pulling on her shirt, allowing Rienne to examine the damaged area beneath the right breast where the ribs had been driven in. It appeared much improved, but Sullyan winced slightly when Rienne touched it.
“Sorry,” she murmured. “You’ll have to be careful of that for the next few days. Do you want the bandages put back?”
Sullyan shook her head. “I can cope with it now the other hurts have gone.” She unbuckled the belt of her breeches, preparing to remove them so Rienne could deal with the other, more intimate, sutures. A sudden rustle startled Rienne. Looking over her shoulder, she saw the Count rising hastily from where he had slept among the bales. He was red faced, acutely embarrassed, and wouldn’t meet Sullyan’s eyes.
He hurried past them, muttering, “I’ll ... um ... just go and ... um, check on the horses.”
“Ty,” called the Major softly. Rienne frowned; it was the first time she had heard anyone use his given name. Judging by the way he jolted to a halt, the Count wasn’t used to it either. Half turning, he looked back.
Sullyan smiled. “I have not yet thanked you for what you did.”
Marik took a backward step, reminding Rienne of a nervous horse. “There’s no need. You’re very welcome.”
“I will not forget the dangers you braved, Ty. I know what you sacrificed by befriending me. I intend to repay you for that.”
His flush deepened and he turned away. “There’s no way you can. Just forget it.”
Sullyan watched him go before turning back to Rienne. “So much pain,” she sighed. Rienne heard a depth of despair in her voice that had its roots deep in her soul. She had the impression it was not just for Marik’s troubles.
The Major removed her breeches and lay down in the straw with a hay bale at her back. Rienne kneeled before her and reached for her little suture knife. On examining the area, she was amazed at how well the flesh had healed, considering the ruin Rykan’s abuse had left.
Delicately, she removed the first few stitches, but then stopped and looked up at Sullyan, catching the younger woman’s eye. Firmly she said, “I want you to tell me about the poison inside you.”
Surprise showed on Sullyan’s face and Rienne experienced brief satisfaction. Clearly the younger woman was unaccustomed to being caught so unprepared.
“I want to know why you sealed it away rather than letting me deal with it. You do know it will kill you, don’t you?”
Sullyan regarded her narrowly. “Rienne, I never had you down as the devious type.”
Hearing the sarcasm, the healer grinned. “It comes of having four older brothers. Now, are you going to tell me, or do you want to walk bow legged all day?”
Sullyan looked down at herself, half naked, exposed, and completely at Rienne’s mercy. She gave a hard smile. “You do seem to have me at a disadvantage.”
Abruptly, her whole face changed and her golden eyes held such an expression of sorrow that Rienne regretted her question.
“Ah, Rienne, I do believe this is going to be the saddest day of my life. Today I must shatter the hopes and dreams of the one person I love above everyone else.”
Sullyan closed her eyes and drew a shuddering breath. Then she motioned for Rienne to continue her work.
“Yes, of course I am aware that the poison will eventually kill me. Unfortunately, there is nothing that I, or anyone else, to my knowledge, can do about it. You must have learned during your time at the Manor that even a minor infection contracted beyond the Veils could prove lethal to Albians?”
Trying to concentrate on two things at once, Rienne said, “Yes, but we were very careful to clean all the wounds and disinfect them thoroughly. Robin was very insistent about it. There’s no residual infection.”
Sullyan’s face paled at the mention of her Captain’s name. “Perhaps I used the wrong word. Substitute ‘contamination’ for ‘infection’.”
Rienne stopped working, her expression slowly changing into horror. “Are you saying you might be ... pregnant?”
The Major shook her head. “No, Rienne. Appalling as that would be, conception is not the problem. It is simpler than that. If an Andaryan and an Albian couple together, they cannot create life between them. Only death. Our two species are not at all compatible, and the Andaryan seed acts like a poison, a corrosive infection which cannot be removed. With Rykan’s seed inside me, I cannot cross the Veils. The pain would kill me if I tried. Neither can I speak through them without pain in excess of what I could bear.” Pausing, she glanced down. “I am trapped here, Rienne. Even if the poison was not lethal, I could survive here only a few months before my body began to fail. Within a year, maybe less, I would die.”
Rienne stared, her mouth open. She could barely take it in. “And Rykan knew this?”
Sullyan nodded. “So what he did was ...” Rienne trailed off, too appalled and upset to carry on.
“Brutal enough,” said Sullyan. “But also deliberately and callously calculated to force me into a corner from which there is no escape. He did not rape me out of lust, at least, not entirely. He did it to show me how little my resistance mattered. The fact that it made me all the more determined amused him, I think. He knew he had already destroyed me. So even though he did not gain what he wanted, Rykan still has the victory.”
Rienne covered her face with her hands, her body trembling. She heard Sullyan’s soft murmur.
“You were right that evening in my rooms. You said I should not let duty interfere with my one chance of happiness. Do you remember?”
Rienne didn’t want to be reminded of that happy evening now. It was too cruel in the light of what she had learned.
“And now it is too late.”
The healer could barely complete her work; her sight was so blurred by tears. Sullyan herself said nothing more, only watched her sadly. Rienne could feel her sympathy and could scarcely bear it. Eventually, packing away her instruments while the Major dressed, Rienne summoned the courage to speak.
“How long?”
“I have no way of knowing.” Sullyan was unwinding the dressing on her wrist to inspect the half-healed skin
beneath. “The power Ty provided to seal off the poison will alleviate the symptoms for a while. But the seal is not strong, and soon the poison will eat through it and start leaching away my strength. I only pray I will be granted enough time.”
“To do what?”
Rienne already knew the answer. In the light of what she had heard, there could only be one thing driving Sullyan now. The Major’s harsh words confirmed it.
“Prevent Rykan from taking the throne. Destroy him. Preferably by my own hand.”
* * * * *
Sullyan watched in silence as Rienne left the barn. The healer walked with slumped shoulders, a clear sign of the pain she felt. Sullyan had asked her to send Robin out to the barn, and as she waited she took some deep breaths, trying to find the strength and courage she knew she would need. Her heart was pounding, and one phrase kept repeating in her mind.
Robin, I have something to tell you ....
Too soon, she heard his footsteps. He walked briskly into the barn, her combat jacket slung over his arm. There was a look of innocent enquiry on his handsome face and her heart lurched painfully. She forced herself to approach him, and he held her jacket open. Shrugging into it for warmth, she failed to suppress a shiver.
“Walk with me, Robin,” she said, suddenly desperate for sunlight on her face. He turned and paced beside her, his easy acceptance making her feel like a traitor. They moved away from the barn, but the damp earth smell and the faint warmth of the sun were too much for Sullyan. It was all too normal, when nothing in her life would ever be normal again.
She stopped and turned to Robin. When she took hold of his hands, he frowned, startled by the intimacy. She began speaking, her voice as level as she could make it, her eyes never leaving her lover’s face. Not even when her words made him try to wrench away.
“Robin, I ....” The words that had echoed in her head refused to come, and she had to clear her throat. “There’s something I need you to understand, and I want you to listen and not interrupt. I cannot come back with you to Albia. What Rykan did to me means that my life there has ended. His actions left a poison within me, and that poison will kill me if I try to cross the Veils.”
His hands jerked within hers but she gripped them all the tighter, desperate now to say what must be said.
“There is nothing you can do to help me. I must stay here and live out what time I have left. But you must return to Albia—I will not see you suffer because of me.”
“I will never leave you—”
Desolate anger surged within her. “You have to! I could not bear seeing you sicken. You must understand, Robin, it is over! Our time together is over.”
Robin’s face went grey and tears pricked Sullyan’s eyes. Grief had made her harsh, but he did not deserve such betrayal. Not from her. She could barely meet his stricken gaze, but forced herself to witness the final moment, the moment Robin was forced to face the ruin of his every hope and dream. His body slumped and she thought he might fall, but her grip on his hands kept him upright. Her heart nearly broke when she realized he would not lean totally on her. Even in his extreme pain, he was aware of her weakness.
He straightened abruptly. Without a word, he pulled his hands away, his strength too great for her to resist. She could sense the pool of tears welling within him, yet he was too numb, too stunned, to shed them.
Helpless, she could only stand and watch as Robin moved away. She didn’t call to him. She knew he needed solitude to come to terms with what he had heard. Gentle as she had been, there was no easy way to hear that the love of your life, your one true soul mate, was leaving before your lives together had even begun. She could almost taste his desolation as she walked back to the barn. Collapsing onto a bale of hay, she buried her face in her hands.
She didn’t know how long it was—only a few minutes, she thought—before she heard light footsteps approaching. Lifting her face, she met Robin’s red-rimmed eyes. She began to rise, but he made a negative gesture and stepped back. Hurt, she gazed at him. He wouldn’t meet her eyes and stared instead toward the horizon, where dark rain clouds were massing again. In silence, she waited for him to speak.
“Will you answer me a simple question? Will you give me a straight and honest answer?”
She nodded. “If I can.”
His voice was hoarse and she was taken aback by his phrasing, but the need in his question was clear.
Wind from the approaching rain clouds stirred the Captain’s short, dark hair. He paused a moment more, considering his words. Sullyan waited with her hands in her lap and her eyes on his pinched, white face.
Muscles jumped along his jawline. He took a deep breath and looked her full in the eyes. She began to tremble. This, she thought, would be the most important question he had ever asked in his entire life.
“Sullyan, do you love me?”
Her indrawn breath was almost a sob. She stood and approached him. Placing her hand on his arm, preparing to bare her soul more deeply than she had ever done before, she said, “How could you doubt me, Robin? Yes, I love you. With all my heart and soul.”
She meant for him to sense the depth of her feelings. This was no time to hold back. Touching the edges of his psyche with her powers, she heard the breath catch in his throat. As he stared deeply into her eyes, captured by what she revealed, she knew he finally understood how deeply she had always loved him. How hard it had been for her to maintain her professional position and carry out her duties while containing such powerful emotions. Now he understood why she had contained them.
Contrition flooded his heart, and she sensed his regret for all the hurt he had given her, the trouble he had caused her, the adolescent way he had sometimes behaved while trying to impress her. She forgave him, and felt his heart lift. He was, he suddenly realized, the only one who could help her now. No one else was in a position to do so.
Despite this new knowledge, Robin had one last question. He gripped her hands tightly while pent-up breath sighed out of his lungs.
“Sullyan, are you absolutely sure there’s no way out of this? No one who might know of a solution, a cure?”
She dropped her gaze, unwilling to show him her pain. Looking past him into the morning sky, she said, “I wonder if you know, really know, what my life means to me? The work I do, the Manor, the position I hold? They have been everything I have ever wanted. They feel right ... necessary. I belong there. It is what I was born for.
“I have been in many battles, as you know. Often, I have been in peril of my life. On two occasions, only the skill and care of those who loved me saved me from death. You know me, Robin. You know I am not fey. I do not seek death, in battle or otherwise. So I tell you now, and hear me well. If there was any way in all the Five Realms to avert what is to happen, I would take it gladly.”
She turned her full gaze on him. The tears welling once more in his dark blue eyes told her that he had accepted what was to come.
She feared he might take her in his arms, and she knew she could not cope with that right now. Her small store of strength was fading. She sincerely hoped Rienne had told the others, she could not bear to go through it all again. Bulldog had guessed, she was fairly sure, she had seen it in the big man’s eyes. She would need his solid, dependable strength very soon, she thought, as would Robin in the weeks to come.
“What will you do now?”
His question was a welcome distraction. Robin was trying to be practical and that was good. It was something she could deal with.
“Under normal circumstances, I would say we had no business interfering in the political struggles of another realm. But I am in a unique position to know exactly what Rykan intends, and I know that if he gains the Andaryan throne, Albia will also be in jeopardy. Rykan will not honor the Pact. So, I will go to Caer Vellet, Robin, to the Hierarch’s Citadel, and I will offer my sword and services in defense of his crown for as long as my strength lasts. I have valuable information concerning Rykan’s battle plans, and I am probably the on
ly person in a position to thwart him. Especially as he does not have the extra power he planned on.”
She smiled, but the Captain looked troubled.
“I have to try, Robin. I have nothing to lose. I also owe a debt to Marik, and if I can persuade the Hierarch to accept him, not only will I rob Rykan of some of his forces, but maybe I can restore Marik’s pride and manor as well.”
The troubled look didn’t leave Robin’s face, and Sullyan knew he still harbored doubts about Marik. She had neither the time nor the energy to deal with his mistrust. A few cold spots of rain landed on her face and she glanced up at the darkening sky. Rain-bearing clouds were running in, and the wind was strengthening.
“We have much to arrange today, Robin, and I fear I will need your power again very soon. I am still too weak to manage on my own just yet. We should go in to the others, we have much to discuss.”
Chapter Five
Sullyan re-entered the hut with Robin beside her. Every face turned her way, and she could tell from their expressions that they knew. Rienne must have told them. A cold sickness churned deep in her stomach, and she knew she couldn’t bear their horror and sympathy. She was hanging on to her sanity by a thread as it was. Any show of emotion—no matter how well intended—might just sever it.
Unable to run from her friends, although she wished with all her heart she could do so, she did the only other thing she could think of. Placing her hands firmly on her hips, feet slightly apart, she faced them squarely. In a startlingly accurate imitation of Bull’s deep bass rumble, she gave them his favorite phrase.
“For the gods’ sake, let us not have the wake before the bloody funeral!”
A strangled laugh—or maybe a sob—from Bull broke the stillness. Sullyan smiled round at them, trying to convey her gratitude without inviting pity. Then, crossing to the bed and collapsing gently onto it, she said, “I hope you have some fellan brewing, Bulldog. I could really use some just now.”
