by J. S. Scott
Truth was, Hope had him wrapped around her little finger, and Jason wasn’t even struggling to get free. If he hadn’t been such an asshole, he would have realized that he was completely, totally, and irrevocably in love with Hope, and probably had been since the day he’d seen her at her high school graduation, at the age of eighteen.
In their current situation, his epiphany left him completely, totally—but hopefully not irrevocably—screwed.
Tell her the damn truth.
Jason vowed he would. Soon. Very soon.
Jason and Hope didn’t emerge for their hike until three mornings later, when they finally untangled themselves from each other long enough to get out into the early morning sunrise.
Hope took a breath of the crisp, mountain air. Her heart flip-flopped as she centered Jason in the lens of her camera and captured his image with the waterfall as a background. She’d started to photograph him a lot in the last few days, wanting to make sure she would remember this surreal period in her life where she felt wanted, needed, cared for by Jason. Her camera adored him, and every photo she’d taken of him took her breath away. “Thanks,” she told him, and lowered her camera. She’d already photographed the falls, and she’d got some incredible wildlife and landscapes as they made the long hike to the place Tate had recommended. He’d sent Jason a trail map, telling him the waterfall was worth seeing, and it was. It was a spectacular sight, the water falling in several different streams from the rocky cliff above. “You’re incredibly photogenic,” she told him teasingly as she moved up to the edge of the viewing cliff to stand beside him.
He wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed his forehead against hers. “You just want blackmail pictures of me in this Broncos shirt,” he accused jokingly in a low rumble.
Hope’s heart melted like it always did when Jason was playfully affectionate, which was almost all the time for the last few days. He had to be touching her in some way constantly, and it wasn’t strictly sexual. “Maybe I do,” she answered mischievously, not wanting to tell Jason the real reason she wanted the photos: so she could look at them when he was no longer a part of her life.
Jason clasped her hand and entwined his fingers with hers. “Ready?”
She nodded. They had a long hike back, and she’d gotten all the photos she needed. “Yes.”
Keeping her hand in his, he walked in front of her, down the steep incline, his footing secure as he traveled over the rocky surface.
“You don’t look like a novice hiker,” Hope mused aloud.
“I’m not, actually,” Jason responded. “I started doing some climbing when I was in college. I still go on different climbs with a few of my college buddies.”
“You’re a climber?” Hope watched her footing as she followed closely behind him. “What sites have you done?”
Jason rattled off several places, some of them pretty advanced courses.
“And you called me crazy for chasing storms?” she chastised. The visions of Jason hanging from a cliff gave her palpitations.
Finally at the bottom of the steep, rocky incline, he reached out and grasped her by the waist and swung her to the grass beside him. “It’s fairly safe,” he protested. “I take safety precautions.”
Hope propped her hand on her hip. “I told you the same thing about chasing extreme weather.”
“That’s different,” he replied, his tone irritated.
“Why?”
“Because it’s you taking those risks. Anything could happen to you.”
“But it’s okay for you to have a dangerous hobby? Taking extreme weather photos is my job.”
“It’s your choice,” Jason answered gruffly. “It’s not like you need the money.”
“Maybe not. But I’m not incredibly wealthy anymore. I gave most of my money away,” she shot back at him. He’d be annoyed, but she didn’t care what he thought right at the moment.
His eyes registered his astonishment, and then narrowed as he stared at her incredulously. “Why? You told me you had it in money markets.”
She hadn’t meant to tell him about the money. Her decision had been personal, and was really none of his business. But they’d grown so close since they’d been here, and she wasn’t angry with him anymore. In fact, she knew she was in love with him, and it made her want to share everything with him.
I love him. I love him so much it hurts.
“What I told you is true. I have enough money to keep me comfortable for the rest of my life, even if I can’t work. But I’ve given away the majority of my inheritance to the victims of the natural disasters I’ve witnessed. It did the victims far more good than it was doing me by sitting around in a bank account.” Knowing how financially brilliant Jason was, she knew he’d be disappointed in her lack of ambition to make more money. She pulled her eyes away from his face, and headed down the trail, not wanting to see his reaction.
“Hope.” Jason caught up with her, grasped her by her upper arms, and swung her around to face him. “You’re the most incredible, sweet, generous woman I’ve ever known,” he admitted in a hoarse voice full of emotion.
She looked at him quizzically, squinting up at him against the sun. “I don’t have the same ambitions as you do. I don’t care about the money. I’m not stupid, and I’ve kept plenty to keep me safe. But money doesn’t make me happy.”
“Then give it all away. It doesn’t matter. I’ll always keep you safe,” he answered urgently. “I have more money than either of us can ever spend. Hell, we couldn’t make a dent in our net worth if we tried.”
She gaped at him, his expression earnest and sincere. “We aren’t staying married, Jason,” she reminded him. Her heart pounded so hard she could hear it thunder in her ears.
“I want to. I want us to stay married forever, Hope. I want you with me wherever I go, and I want to be with you wherever you need to travel. I don’t want to separate—not in a week, not in this lifetime.” He looked at her covetously, pensively.
“You can’t be serious?” She wanted Jason more than she wanted anything in the world, but he couldn’t really want to stay with her forever.
“I’ve never been more serious. I don’t want anyone else, Peaches. Just you. Somehow, I’ll deal with your job. I’ll go with you so that I can keep you safe. You can give away my money once yours is all donated if it makes you happy.” His low voice vibrated with intensity.
He’s serious. He really wants me if he’s willing to let me give his money away.
Jason didn’t joke about money. Investments and finance were his life. “Really?” she answered tremulously. Her eyes started to tear. “You want to stay married?”
Oh God, please don’t let him be teasing me about this.
She knew her heart would shatter into a million tiny little pieces if he wasn’t sincere.
He pulled her into his arms, wrapped them around her securely. “I need you, Hope. Please stay with me. I need your sweetness to balance out the asshole in me. I need your huge, generous heart to remind me that not everyone cares about money. I need to be wanted for something other than my bank account. I need you to fight with me when I’m giving you too much shit. And I won’t complain about your career.” He hesitated before he added, “Well, I’ll try not to complain about it too much.”
Hope’s heart swelled with every word he uttered. She threw her arms around his neck and pressed her face into his shoulder. Her tears fell steadily. “I won’t donate your money. I promise.” She sobbed; relief coursed through her trembling body. “I think you already donate plenty.”
“What’s the matter, baby?” He stroked his hand over her hair, his voice confused and concerned.
Pulling back, she looked into his glorious blue eyes and saw…him. Jason left himself wide open and vulnerable, with no attempt to hide his fear. He wanted her that much. “I was so afraid. I didn’t know how I was going to live through saying goodbye,” she told him bluntly.
“You’ll stay with me?” he asked, his voice cautiou
s.
“Yes, you crazy, beautiful man. I want to be with you more than I want anything or anyone,” Hope replied breathlessly. “I’m addicted to you.”
Jason grinned. “It worked. I got you hooked on sex.”
“I’m not addicted to sex,” she protested. “I’m addicted to you.”
Leaving a firm arm around her waist, Jason grasped her left hand and brought it to his mouth to kiss the ring on her finger. “Then marry me, Hope. For real.”
A startled laugh escaped her. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think we’re already married.”
“But you never had a choice. Choose me,” he demanded roughly, his liquid blue eyes molten with emotion.
“I wouldn’t choose anyone else,” she told him gently as she lifted her hand to stroke his whiskered jaw.
“Thank fuck!” He picked her up by the waist and spun her around. “No more talk of leaving me. Ever,” he insisted bossily.
“Never,” she replied with a happy laugh as she found her footing on the ground again, happy that he had his dominance back again. She had hated seeing Jason vulnerable. If she had her choice, she’d let him try to boss her around for a lifetime. Not that she’d let him, of course. But she preferred to see Jason bold compared to the naked fear she’d seen in his eyes a few moments ago. But God, how that openness had touched her soul. Jason Sutherland wasn’t the kind of man who let anybody see his weaknesses. However, he cared enough to show them to her.
“Come with me.” He clasped her hand in his and pulled her along behind him. They plowed through the pines until he finally stopped and turned to her. “I need to be inside you, Hope.”
She wanted him, too, and she understood what he was feeling. Her core clenched with the need to have him move inside her, giving her assurance that they weren’t parting. It was a need that went deeper than physical pleasure, a validation of their agreement to stay together. “Yes.” Her body craved to be joined to his.
“You’re mine now,” Jason said covetously and backed her up against the large trunk of a tall pine. He joined their hands, twined their fingers together and pinned them over her head as he took her mouth with breathtaking swiftness.
Hope gave way to him immediately, opened her mouth to let him plunder, and moaned against his kiss. Her body fired red-hot as she melted into his hard, muscular form, just as needy as him to feel them joined. She met his tongue, tangled it with hers, and let him claim her just as surely as she claimed him.
She came away from the embrace panting. “Now, Jason. I can’t wait this time.” He didn’t need to tease her body. Her core was already saturated, hungry and needy to be filled. “Please.”
Jason made short work of her jeans, lowering them to her knees while he opened the front of his own denims. “We don’t have the mirror, Hope. I—”
“Oh, Jason.” Her heart clenched as she saw the hesitant look on his face. “I haven’t needed that mirror since the beginning, although it was pretty hot. I know the feel of you, your scent, and your touch. I’m never going to freak out on you again.”
Whirling around, she braced her hands on the trunk of the tree. “Fuck me, Jason. Take me before I die of frustration,” she begged, completely unfamiliar with this position, but so desperate for him she didn’t care how he took her, as long as he did.
His hands palmed the cheeks of her ass and stroked over them with reverence. “Jesus, Hope. You’re so damn beautiful.” One hand moved between her thighs, and he let out a low hiss as he was greeted by nothing except wet heat. “You’re so hot, sweetheart. I can’t wait either.”
Hope dropped her head in relief as Jason impaled her, sunk so deep inside her sheath that she cried out his name. “Jason.”
“It’s me, sweetheart. It will always be me,” he reassured her possessively.
Pulling himself almost completely out of her channel, he thrust back in and grasped her hips to keep her steady. Hope squirmed, pushed back against him; she needed more. “Please, Jason. Don’t make me wait.”
Her pleading tone inflamed him. He started to move; his cock stroked in and out of her saturated pussy powerfully, forcefully. Hope met his every thrust, moved back against him and their skin audibly slapped together from the strength of his movements. “Yes. Harder,” she pleaded, needing Jason to give her everything he had.
Moving one hand from her hips, he slid it down her belly and between her thighs, opened her folds until he found her clit. “Come for me, baby. I’m not going to last long,” he grunted. His finger stroked blissfully hard over the pulsating bud.
Hope trembled, the feel of him filling her over and over again and the rough stimulation to her clit making her come undone. She splintered, fell apart as her powerful climax took control of her body, crashed over her in waves, and continued on as Jason pummeled into her and found his own release with a strangled groan. “Hope.” Her name tore from his lips and he entered her one more time, going as deeply as possible as he spilled himself into her womb. Still inside her as they shuddered against each other, he wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her neck. “My sweet Hope,” he said, claiming her aloud.
Hope wasn’t sure how long they stayed that way, joined together, basking in the bliss they’d just shared and the intimacy of their positions. Jason finally moved, pulled her up and covered her again, and fastened her jeans before he did up his own. As he pulled her against him, he buried his face in her hair and held her so tightly she could barely breathe, but Hope wasn’t about to complain. He felt way too good, and she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and stroked his upper back in soothing motions, the two of them completely lost in each other.
Jason was out of time.
He gripped the steering wheel of the SUV a little tighter, his whole body tense. After their agreement to stay together yesterday, regret had churned in his gut, guilt almost eating him alive.
I have to tell her.
He’d never once thought about trying to get away with not telling her he’d set up this whole sham of a marriage. After he started everything out wrong, he wanted to make the situation right. Problem was, he wasn’t quite sure how to do it, and he couldn’t bear the thought of Hope leaving him.
She deserves the truth.
Hope had lied, but it was nothing that personally impacted his life, or so she thought. Plus, she had come clean about everything to him. The secret he kept was personal, and she could very well end up hating his guts for doing it. Hell, he hated himself for it.
She’s staying with me. I have exactly what I want.
But really, he didn’t. Fuck! He’d spent most of his life without a single damn insecurity. Even when he’d taken over his father’s company and discovered it was nearly broke, he’d believed that he could fix the problem. Now, he couldn’t go two seconds without thinking about Hope: how she’d react to learning that he’d actually orchestrated their marriage, whether she was happy, whether she’d get hurt or if she was sad.
Love is Hell.
Jason knew he loved Hope. He’d gotten just as crazy as Grady, and God knew that his friend had practically gone insane over his wife, Emily.
Tell her now; tell her later. Both ways, he was screwed, and he did need to tell her. They weren’t going to be happy until he did.
Selfish bastard.
He didn’t want to hurt her, not after all she’d been through and how far she’d come toward trusting him. However, some of his hesitance was selfish, his personal desire to not see the hurt look on her face when she found out what he’d done. His own heart would be broken because he’d wounded her—again.
“I’ll never lie to her again,” he muttered angrily as he pulled into the private drive of the guesthouse.
He’d gone into town to pick up a few things they needed for dinner and left Hope at home because she wanted to preview and organize some of the photos she’d taken the day before. Jason had been gone longer than he’d meant to be: he stopped at the flower shop to buy Hope some flowers, and the j
ewelry store, the same store where he’d bought their wedding rings before he’d flown to Vegas. He ended up buying a diamond heart necklace, surrounded in diamonds with an emerald heart in the center that matched her eyes. It was the best way to express how much he loved her, and she could wear it all the time. Still not satisfied, he’d ducked into a specialty shop and got her a waterproof camera, hoping to hell she’d be using it for trips out on the boat.
Jason exited the SUV, gathered up everything, and walked the short distance to the house with his heart hammering and his nerves about shot. He’d tell her now, before another minute passed. It wasn’t in his nature to put off something unpleasant, something he had to do, which was why his remorse gnawed at his insides. For both their sakes, he needed to get this task over with and rely on Hope’s generous heart, her capacity to forgive.
Maybe if she understands that I love her, that I was temporarily insane…
Jason put his key in the door, having locked it before he left. Surprisingly, he found the door unlocked.
I know I locked it.
It had been a priority, and he remembered doing it, not willing to leave Hope vulnerable, even if they were in a small town.
“Hope,” he bellowed as he walked in the door. She wasn’t in the living room where she had been when he left.
Jason plopped the load he carried down on the kitchen counter, and moved quickly to find her. Finally, he returned to the kitchen. The house was empty.
Where the hell did she go?
As he looked around the kitchen, hoping to find a note, he found something else that made him freeze for a moment as he stared at it. It was the receipt for their rings, a very similar piece of paper to what he’d gotten today when he made another purchase at the same store. How had it ended up here?
