He gaped open-mouthed, as if at a loss for words. Then suddenly as if a realisation had hit, a sweet smile spread across his gorgeous face. He stepped toward her and his expression changed again. His eyes became darker as he reached up to stroke her cheek.
“We don’t have a problem, Flick,” he spoke quietly and huskily. Heat rushed through her body. “I’ve wanted you since the first time we kissed…no, even before that. I just got the sense that you may be…ah…a virgin and didn’t want to take advantage of you. Things had to be on your terms.” He tucked her hair behind her ear and continued to stroke her face.
“Well…I’m sick of being a bloody virgin. I want to experience things. I want to experience sex…with you…now.” Her hands grabbed his checked shirt. She was desperate to convey her feelings but worried it was all coming out wrong.
“There is a slight problem, then.” His eyes stayed locked on hers but her heart sank.
She bit her lip. “Oh? Do I want to hear this?” She gulped.
“I don’t want just sex, Flick. I want us to be a permanent thing and so I want to make love to you. However cheesy that sounds, it’s the truth.” His voice was soft. He took her face in his hands and lightly brushed her lips with his. She realised she was holding her breath and was feeling a little lightheaded. The air rushed from her lungs as she absorbed his words.
“That would suggest…that you, kind of…love me... Is that what you mean, or am I getting this all completely wrong?” She gulped as she placed her hands over his.
He took a deep breath and paused. “I think I’ve loved you since that morning you were trying to do origami with all your paperwork.” He chuckled. She blushed at the memory. She had felt so stupid on that day and was a little overwhelmed to hear that he had fallen for her then.
“Oh…wow.” She was trembling now. He kissed her again, their tongues danced as they tasted each other. She ran her hands through his hair and he pressed his body against hers. She inhaled sharply when she felt his arousal press against her stomach.
Stepping away slightly, he eased her denim jacket from her shoulders and slipped her pretty lace top over her head, followed by the camisole underneath. Her chest rose and fell rapidly as she gazed up into his eyes. He crouched and slid the skirt down her thighs. Then he stood and held her at arm’s length looking at her, all of her, standing there before him in her white lace underwear.
“Wow…just as beautiful as I imagined,” he breathed as his eyes scanned her body.
Stepping into him, she nervously pulled his shirt down his arms and discarded it with the other clothes. His T-shirt came off next, exposing his sculpted pectorals and defined abs, the kind she had only ever seen on posters. His low hanging jeans revealed a little trail of curls leading down under his waistband. Suddenly, she froze. Jim stroked her cheek and unfastened his belt. He slipped his jeans and boxers down his legs never moving his soft gaze from her. She gasped and shivered as he stood before her naked and in a state of arousal.
“Hey, you’re cold.” He pulled her into an embrace. She wondered if he could feel her heart pounding against him. “Shall we get into bed? Warm you up?”
She nodded silently, feeling in complete awe of his form. They climbed into the limited space, and he lay beside her propped up on his elbow. He trailed his finger down her cheek and placed his palm over her heart. “Hey, are you okay? If you’re having second thoughts—”
“N-no…no second thoughts.” She lifted her hand and pulled him toward her. The kiss was gentle to begin with. She felt his heart rate increase as he moved his hand from her heart to her breast to gently caress her through the lace. She breathed in sharply at the overwhelming sensation and he stopped. “Don’t stop, Jim…I’m fine…honestly,” she breathed.
Flick was certainly feeling warmer as her own arousal took over. She felt heat pooling between her thighs. Jim’s fingers continued to toy with her nipple through her lace bra and it hardened under his caress as a rush of pleasure traversed her body. A moan escaped her and he smiled. Reaching around her back, he released her bra clasp,
“Is this okay?” Jim whispered.
She nodded. “Yes…please don’t stop.” He removed the bra and let it fall to the floor over his shoulder. After admiring and caressing her for a few seconds more he leaned toward her body and took her pink bud into his mouth. Flick gasped as her eyes rolled back and she grabbed at his hair, desire coursing through every fibre of her being. She released another husky moan and his mouth played there a little longer. His hand, however, slid down…down…down, tracing the outline of her waist and her hip…to the front of her panties. He gently stroked her over the fabric and she opened her thighs for him. His breath caught in his throat and he moved to kiss her stomach. Slowly, he slid his hand inside her panties. As he continued with the feather light kisses, his fingers found her dampness. He let out what sounded like a low appreciative growl as he explored her there, his thumb circling her sensitive place.
She writhed beneath him, her breathing became irregular, and she felt an amazing tension building inside her as his fingers moved. “Oh, Jim! Oh, Jim, don’t stop.” She clung to him as if he were her lifeline. Her eyes were clenched shut, her head thrown back, and her inhibitions set free. Suddenly, she cried out as searing pleasure ripped through her body like an electric current. She felt as though she were soaring above the earth and having an out of body experience simultaneously. It was better than any orgasm she had given herself (and there hadn’t been that many). He moved so that their eyes were locked again.
“Are you okay?” he asked again, concern playing on his face as he watched her come back down to earth.
“Please stop worrying. I’m better than okay.” She kissed him gently. “And Jim? Please do that to me again.”
With a wide, handsome smile and needing no other encouragement, he leaned to grab his jeans, fumbled around until he found his wallet and removed a little foil packet.
He sat up to look down at her as she lay beside him. “I wasn’t planning this, you have to know. But I bought a pack just in case. I wasn’t going to pressure you…please believe that—”
She placed her hands over his lips. “Jim…you don’t need to say anymore…just put it on…please?” He did as she asked, and his eyes remained on her as she slipped the white lace panties down her legs. He swallowed hard.
Flick watched as his Adam’s apple moved in his throat. She glanced down to look at him in all his masculine glory. She had nothing to compare him to, but in her humble and inexperienced opinion he looked big and pretty damn fine. But now she was scared—scared she would make a fool of herself or that it would hurt. But she was in no doubt that she wanted this, wanted him. He manoeuvred so that he was kneeling between her thighs and bent to kiss her stomach, stroking his fingers down her body until he was touching her again. Her back arched involuntarily and she closed her eyes, moaning and sighing with pleasure.
“Are you sure about this, Flick, sweetheart? There’s no pressure, I don’t want to rush you—” His voice was soft, almost a whisper.
“Jim, please, I’m fine. Just take it steady okay? I’m a little scared.” She gave a nervous laugh.
~~~~~
Looking down at her as she lay beneath him, he felt he had never witnessed a more beautiful sight. Her smooth skin lay before him, only for him. An overwhelming array of emotions flooded his body: love, lust, pride, admiration. She was perfect. She was his. He gently lay on top of her first, and they kissed and caressed each other. Eventually, when he had plucked up the necessary courage, he guided himself inside her, relishing the feeling, as he worshipped her breast with his mouth.
“Ahhh!” she yelped and he froze.
He panicked. “Oh my God, are you okay?!”
She smiled reassuringly and nodded, grasping at his buttocks to urge him on.
“Oh, Flick, you…you feel amazing.” He peppered her beautiful face with kisses as he moved inside her. Finding her tender spot with his fingers again h
e massaged until she groaned in ecstasy once more. Hearing her sent him over the edge. His movements became faster and more urgent. “Oh, Flick…Flick, I love you!” he shouted out as he came, grasping onto her and hugging her to him.
When he had reconnected with planet Earth again, he looked down to find tears cascading down her face, and she was shuddering beneath him, the drops if saltwater trailing down and soaking her hair. He was horrified and immediately felt tears sting the back of his own eyes. He needed to comfort her. She had given herself to him, and now she was sobbing? Oh God, what have I done?
“Hey, hey, shhh. Flick, it’s okay. Did I hurt you? I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry.” He sat and pulled her up into his lap. He stroked her hair and hugged her close, wiping away her tears and biting back his own. This was not supposed to happen.
Suddenly, she laughed through her sobs. “No…no…don’t be sorry, Jim. That was amazing. I was expecting it to be really painful and terrifying but it was wonderful. It was lovely. You were lovely.” She placed a hand on each cheek and held his gaze. She kissed him fervently to communicate her feelings. Relief washed over him. “I think I’m just a little…overwhelmed that’s all.” She sniffed and laughed again. “I’m so glad you were my first.” At her words, he felt that sting behind his eyes again. Apparently, it had been a pretty emotional experience for both of them.
“I do love you, Flick. I meant that.” His voice quivered as he tried to rein himself in. He ran his thumb along her bottom lip and kissed it.
She sighed. “Jim…I love you too.”
~~~~~
May 2002 – Seven Years Before the Break-up
“I can’t believe we’ve done it! We’ve finally finished! It’s all done. Goodbye education, hello big wide world!” Polly’s melodramatic spinning and swooshing of her arms in her robes made everyone laugh. The gang of friends were standing around taking photos whilst their parents chatted and compared notes. Jim’s parents hadn’t been able to make it due to his dad’s rapidly failing health. He was disappointed but totally understood.
It had been an exhausting and emotional day. Flick had sent her parents off for some R and R at their hotel and she informed him that she was going back to her dorm to pack up the last of her belongings. They had secured a little house to rent in Kentish Town and would be moving in straight after graduation, much to her mother’s disappointment. Jim had secured some work as a proof reader and Felicity was starting work at a gallery in London.
“Come up in about twenty minutes, honey bun, and you can help me load the car up before we set out for dinner with my Mum and Dad.” Flick winked at Jim and squeezed his bottom. He agreed to see her up there. She wandered off through the University grounds reminiscing about the wonderful times they had all shared here. It had been a difficult few years but fun all the same.
Her room was all but cleared, her painted canvases wrapped and piled up carefully with the rest of her belongings. Jim had insisted her art would be adorning the walls of their new place.
She had already helped him pack his room the day before. It had taken longer than either of them had expected because they had ended up looking through some old photos of his family holidays in the stunning Scottish Highlands. She was amazed by the beauty of the remote places he had visited with his parents and brother. They were the types of places she could sit and admire and paint for hours. Actually sitting and painting a view whilst it remained before her instead of painting from memory would be a novelty. She hoped one day he would take her there and then maybe those paintings could adorn their walls, too.
She had used the excuse about loading the car to get out of the way and have some time with Jim before dinner. She had a little surprise planned for him. Piling all the boxes on the floor by the door to create a temporary wall, she stripped herself of her gowns, clothes, and cap. Butterflies set about tripping the light fantastic in her tummy as she readied herself for Jim’s imminent arrival.
~~~~~
Jim stood chatting to his friends, but idly wondering what Flick was doing. She’s scheming. I wonder what she’s up to. Curiosity eventually got the better of him, and he made his excuses to leave. He walked across campus to Flick’s room. On arrival, he knocked on the door. “Hey sweetheart, it’s me. Can I come in?”
“You certainly can,” she purred from inside.
Jim nibbled on his lip, as he walked in, wondering what was about to happen. He was greeted by the wall of boxes. Flick was hidden behind them. Closing the door he peeped around the barrier and inhaled sharply at what he saw. She lay reclined on her bed, not a stitch of clothing on her delectable curves apart from her mortarboard and Oxford scarf tied loosely around her neck and draped between her breasts, the tassels just covering her special place. Jim couldn’t help but grin as he slowly prowled over to her, dropping to his knees before her and diving straight in to kiss her underneath the tassels. She gasped as pleasure surged through her body. After gifting her with a delicious orgasm he discarded his clothes and climbed onto the bed, little foil packet in his hands at the ready. She snatched it from him and threw it across the room.
“Hey!” He pouted at the prospect of not having his way with her.
She grinned. “No need for those anymore.” Her eyebrows wiggled suggestively. “I’ve been on the pill for a while now and we’re safe to go commando.”
A low moan erupted from him and he rolled his eyes back before climbing between her thighs, removing her mortarboard and sinking himself inside her. “Seriously, I think I’ve died and gone to heaven.” He gasped as he moved.
Jim made love to her, slowly and languorously, enjoying the new sensations they were experiencing together, devouring each other with their mouths and exploring each other’s bodies with their hands. It was an intense and powerful experience. When they had both had their fill and were completely sated, gazing lovingly at each other as their breathing calmed, Jim decided it was time to put his own surprise into action.
He leapt from the bed. “Sit up and close your eyes,” he commanded. She giggled at his bossiness.
“Why?” She was clearly in a playful, stubborn mood.
“Just do it!” he demanded as he fumbled around in his jacket pocket.
Reluctantly, she perched herself on the end of the bed. The scarf was still in place around her neck.
“Keep them closed!” he demanded again. She was sniggering uncontrollably. “You cannae open your eyes ‘til you’ve calmed down,” he chastised, but he too was trying not to laugh. Pursing her lips, she finally managed to quell the giggles and sat eyes closed, back straight. “Okay, you can open them now.”
She opened one eye and then both eyes wide. “What the—” she gasped.
Jim kneeled in front of her, naked, holding out a diamond ring in his shaking hand. “Now, I know this is a bit unorthodox…and I’m a tad naked…but I wanted to remember this moment for the rest of my life.” He gulped and swallowed hard, but the huge grin on her face encouraged him to continue. “I only intend on doing this once and…so it had to be special.”
He cleared his throat before continuing. “Felicity, I’ve loved you since the moment I first set eyes on you. And I’m sorry for doing this whilst you’re naked too…although let me just say that you are the most stunningly gorgeous woman on the face of the Earth right now…I’ve never loved you more… S-sorry, I digress…ahem…I was going to do it later…at…at dinner but seeing you like this…beautiful…wearing my favourite outfit yet…I had to do it now…Flick…Felicity…will you marry me?” His words came out in such a rush he could have passed out when he had finished.
She gaped at him as he kneeled feeling quite vulnerable in every sense before her. He hoped she could see the sincerity in his eyes and not be too distracted by how ridiculous he must look. His heart pounded harder the longer she stared at him. He gulped and pleaded at her with his eyes, suddenly thinking he had made a mistake. He dropped his gaze momentarily along with his hand. When he lifted his head again, she had c
overed her mouth with her hand and tears had escaped from her glistening eyes.
Oh no, this wasn’t meant to happen. “Flick?”
She shook her head. “Oh Jim, I’m so, sorry. I ruined that whole thing. I was just a bit…stunned. And I thought you were joking.”
He inhaled sharply. “No…I’ve never meant anything more…but I think maybe I shouldn’t have—”
“Ask me again.” She wiped at her eyes.
“Sorry?” He was confused.
Her eyes softened. “Ask that important question again, please, Jim.”
“Erm…okay…” He took a deep breath, and this time feeling a little calmer, he spoke more steadily. “Felicity, I’ve loved you since the day I met you. You make me so happy. I want to share my life with you. I want to be with you forever. Please will you make me the happiest man alive? Felicity, will you marry me?”
“Oh yes, Jim! Yes!” She threw her arms around him and they tumbled back on the bed to start all over again.
Chapter 5
September 2003 – East Boldre, Hampshire – Six Years Before the Break-up
“Oh, my darling, you look…you look…radiant!” Edgar stood dewy eyed as his only daughter descended the wide, sweeping staircase at her family home. Seeing her dad wrought with emotion only served to make tears well in her eyes too.
She had taken all of ten minutes to choose her wedding dress. It was long and fitted to accentuate her curves. The bottom kicked out and there was a long train to the back. The lace-up bodice was strapless to show off her beautiful décolleté, and the front sparkled with tiny diamantes. She had chosen white roses tied dimply with white ribbon. Her hair was smooth and sleek, in a low bun off to one side and dotted with crystals. To complete the look, she wore a silver tiara with real diamonds that her father had insisted upon for his adorable princess.
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