On the pew in front of Eva was a very shapely woman wearing a skintight dress that showed every curve. Eva caught herself fixated on the woman and quickly took her eyes away. Eva wasn’t gay—she loved men, in fact—but she’d done so many films with women, that either sex could cause her to feel lustful.
Eva swallowed hard and shook her head. Why were these thoughts invading her mind during a worship service? Wasn’t this supposed to be God’s house? So why was the devil tormenting her here with his demonic presence?
That was what her grandmother had always called Eva’s precocious sexuality—demonic. A trick of the enemy and a curse. Eva always agreed with her, because it did have roots in evil. It was just that the evil had a name—Uncle Parnell.
He’d started touching Eva before she even knew the names of her body parts. He upgraded to full-fledged intercourse by the time she was fourteen. His abuse didn’t stop until she ran away from home at the age of sixteen. A few months later she did her first adult film. If nothing else, she had experience in mentally taking herself to another place during sex. It made her a rising star in the industry.
Eva closed her eyes and listened to the music coming from the choir stand. They were singing a song about saints coming to worship. Yvonne was leading the song, and her voice sounded so pure and angelic that it brought tears to Eva’s eyes. But it wasn’t just the good music that touched Eva’s spirit. The words echoed through her mind and landed in her conscience. Eva felt like she was the very opposite of a saint. It made her remember her grandmother’s pastor, Reverend Wells, who always used to differentiate between the “saints and the ain’ts.” Reverend Wells would say, “The ain’ts ain’t trying to live right, ain’t asking God for forgiveness, and they ain’t going to heaven.”
Yes, Eva would put herself in the “ain’ts” category. If there was a heaven, she probably wouldn’t get anywhere close to it. So much wrong had been done to her, and she’d done so much wrong, that heaven would probably repel her at the gate. Even still, the music was soothing and encouraging. The lyrics promised that if the saints worshipped, the King of Glory would come in.
Well, she remembered praying that her uncle would never touch her again. She’d asked God to strike him down. She didn’t know if that was worship, but no one ever showed up. No one stopped him.
Tears streamed down Eva’s face. Everyone around her seemed to be caught up in some form of worship. Hands were extended; shouts of praise were going forth. Something in the music seemed to fortify their faith. Eva searched her heart for faith but couldn’t find any.
After the music came the sermon. The message was about trusting God. The preacher said something about not worrying about your situation, but trusting God to see you through.
Eva thought about her situation. She was down to her last five dollars, and she had tried to do the right thing. She had applied for jobs, but since she didn’t even have a high school diploma, she thought she’d get only a few calls back. She hadn’t gotten any. Well, she’d gotten one, and it was from the strip club, not any of the jobs that didn’t require her to be naked.
Eva sighed heavily and wiped the tears away. She finally knew why she was in church. She was there looking for a miracle. She wanted to have a job that she wasn’t ashamed of, but her physical needs were getting the best of her. Food, clothing, and shelter were essential, and five dollars wasn’t covering any of that.
The preacher said to have faith. Was faith required for a miracle? Eva wasn’t sure if she had any—at least not in anyone other than herself.
CHAPTER 6
YVONNE
I am the last choir member in the choir stand after service. I always take it upon myself to straighten the chairs and pick up any stray trash. We have a cleaning service to take care of the church during the week, but I don’t mind helping out.
Lord, let me stop lying to myself. I stay afterward so that I can chat with Kingston as he collects his music and locks away the extra musical instruments. He sure looks fine today. I’m not quite sure I should be enjoying his good looks so much right up here in the sanctuary, but I most certainly am. The Lord truly knew what He was doing when He constructed this man.
“Yvonne, you sang beautifully today.”
Kingston’s voice snaps me out of my daydream, and I have to look away from his penetrating eyes. “Thank you, Brother Kingston. I just wanted to let God use me.”
“Well, He did, and I think you pretty much retired that song from any other soloist. If we sing ‘When the Saints Go to Worship’ with any other singer, it’s going to sound crazy.”
Now I do look up at him and smile. “You are a mess, Kingston.”
“I am a mess. And I’m hungry. Why don’t you let me take you to brunch at Phil the Fire?”
“Oh, I can’t. I’ve got . . .”
“What? You’ve got what?” Kingston asks. “Another date? If you’ve got another brother wrapped around your little finger, then let me know now.”
I almost say something cliché, like “I’m married to Jesus,” but Kingston’s playful facial expression melts away all my objections. Why shouldn’t I, anyway? He’s single, and so am I. Plus, it’s just brunch, not a marriage proposal.
“Well, I guess it’ll . . . Wait a minute, Kingston. I’ll be right back.”
I dash out of the choir stand and up the center aisle of the church to catch up with Eva right before she leaves the sanctuary. I wondered if she’d come out to service. Sometimes when people want a free meal, they come to New Faith and then we never see them again until the next time they’re hungry. It’s a shame, because most of them need Jesus more than some canned goods and powdered milk. Eva is waiting around after service, so maybe she has another need.
“Eva!”
She spins around with a look of shock on her face. “Oh, hi, Yvonne.”
I give her a hug and feel her entire body stiffen. She doesn’t hug me back but stares at me when I release her. “Did you enjoy service?”
“I did. I’m glad I came,” she replies.
“Do you think you’ll come back?”
She winces. “I don’t know. I’ve got to go back to work.”
“You got your job back?” I hug Eva again. “That’s wonderful news, right?”
Eva looks at the floor. “It is. Um . . . thank you for helping me and praying with me. I appreciate it.”
“You’re so welcome! Do you need anything? Are you waiting for someone?”
“N-no, I’m not waiting for anyone. I was just . . . Well . . . it’s silly, but I was waiting for a sign from God. I asked Him something during service, and I was waiting for an answer or something.”
“Hmm . . . you didn’t get your sign?”
“Nope. Nothing.”
“Well, sometimes when God is quiet, He wants us to use what He’s already given us and then trust Him.”
She nods. “I’m not sure I’ve figured this out.”
“None of us can ever hope to figure God out, so don’t feel too bad about that.”
I quickly take a piece of paper and pen out of my purse and scribble my telephone number down. “Here. Take this. Call me if you need anything. Anytime. I hope you come back and visit us.”
Eva stares at the piece of paper like she doesn’t know if she wants to take it or not, so I fold it and tuck it into her open purse. Then I hug her once more. This time she hugs me back, holds on for dear life.
When she releases me, there are tears in her eyes. She is a pitiful sight, and I can’t just let her leave like this. My mama didn’t raise me to let the wounded suffer, and God wouldn’t be too pleased, either, I don’t think.
“Thank you.” Eva says again before turning to walk away.
“Have you eaten yet today? My friend Brother Kingston is taking me to brunch. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you came along.”
The side of Eva’s mouth twitches, the closest thing she gives me to a smile. “I’m sure he will mind.”
“Well, I don’t care wh
at he thinks. If he doesn’t want both of us, then he can just eat his brunch alone. You and I can find something to eat without him.”
Eva cocks her head to one side. “Why are you being so nice to me? We just met.”
“Because you seem like you could use a friend. You should be glad you didn’t show up here years ago. I wasn’t nearly as friendly then. God’s been working on me.”
“I wish I had come here years ago,” Eva says.
“Better late than never.”
“I guess.”
“So are you going to brunch with us?”
She shakes her head. “Not this time, Yvonne, but I promise you I will soon, especially if your friend is paying.”
This time when she turns to walk away, I can’t think of anything else to stop her. I notice how well she’s dressed, in another nice suit and expensive-looking shoes. She looks like a corporate professional. It makes me wonder how she fell on tough times. But then again, our food bank has serviced everyone from drug addicts to ex-VPs. Down and out doesn’t discriminate.
Kingston walks up behind me and touches my back. “You ready to go?”
“I guess so.”
“Don’t sound so excited, Yvonne.”
I chuckle and run a hand through my thick shoulder-length bob. “I’m sorry, Kingston. I was just thinking about something.”
“Do you want to do this some other time, then?”
“No, I’m fine. Let’s go. Are you driving, or are we going separately?”
Kingston’s eyes light up, and a smile spreads across his face. “Well, we can ride together, but I’m not sure what people would say. Maybe we should drive separately.”
“You’ve been trying to take me out for the past two years, Kingston. Everybody knows!”
He winks. “But not everyone knows you’ve said yes! Meet me there in thirty minutes.”
I watch Kingston skip and hop out of the sanctuary. It tickles me that he’s so happy to go on a date with me. My ex-husband, Luke, never acted this way. Luke always thought he was the prize and that I should be grateful to have him.
Pam walks up to me with her arms outstretched and TJ in tow. I give her a hug and the miniature Troy. We all know how bad Troy got on Pam’s nerves when she was pregnant with that baby, so it’s no wonder he’s the spitting image of his daddy.
“Hi, Auntie Vonne. Can I come over your house for some banana pudding?”
I laugh out loud. “What makes you think I have some banana pudding at my house?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know. But if you don’t, can you make some, like you did on Easter?”
“Are boys born with the ability to sweet-talk us?” I ask Pam.
She chuckles. “Well, this one sure was. TJ, go over there with Gretchen and Cicely. I’ll be there soon.”
When the boy is out of earshot, I ask, “You spoken to Troy yet?”
“No. I haven’t said two words to him since he embarrassed me in front of his friend.”
“How long do you plan on keeping up the silent treatment?”
“Until he apologizes, Yvonne.”
“Did you finish your proposal at least?”
Pam nods and smiles. “Yes, I did. I’m going to turn it in tomorrow.”
“Well, that’s good.”
“Let me go, girl. I want to feed these kids and get some writing done on my new novel before Troy comes home from golfing with Logan.”
“Since when did Troy golf?”
Pam purses her lips together and rolls her eyes. “Exactly. He doesn’t. He’s probably making a fool of himself as we speak.”
“But this Logan guy is rich? He can help Troy, right?”
“He is rich, and he’s a really nice guy, Yvonne. Maybe he’ll rub off on Troy.”
“Maybe so. Call me later, okay?”
Pam gives me a hug. “I will. Maybe we can get together tomorrow for pedicures or something.”
“Okay.”
Pam collects her children, and they exit the sanctuary, leaving me in a nearly empty church. I don’t know why I’m stalling. I’m sure Kingston is almost to the restaurant by now.
I was going to ask Pam what she thought, but I already knew what she’d say. She and Taylor have made their thoughts pretty clear on me getting back into the dating pool. They’re all for it.
I start walking toward the door, still contemplating standing Kingston up and taking myself on home. It might be the best thing for both of us. I’d have no idea what to do if he thought we were an item after one meal.
What if he tries to kiss me?
I don’t think he’d do that this soon, but what if he did? I wouldn’t know how to fight him off. I’ve never had to do anything like that. Luke was the first and only man I’d ever been alone with, and he didn’t do anything to steal my virtue while we dated.
Then a vision of Luke and his new woman comes to mind. Him whispering to her and her giggling flirtatiously. The thought of it makes me sick to my stomach.
I take in a deep breath and exhale slowly. My stomach growls, and it seals the deal for me. Whether it’s a date or not, a woman’s got to eat. And food always seems to taste better when a man is paying for it.
When I get to the restaurant, Kingston rushes to my car to open my car door before I have the chance to do it myself. His hazel eyes smile at me as I swing my legs out of the car. He closes the door and then holds his arm out for me to hold on to.
“It is a beautiful day, isn’t it?” I ask when I can’t take another second of Kingston gazing at my face.
“Yes, it is. A beautiful spring day to spend with a beautiful lady.”
I laugh out loud and give Kingston a playful slap on the arm. “I don’t know how many more compliments I can take from you.”
“Well, I can’t help you there. I finally talked you into going out with me, so I’m going to shower you with compliments.”
As we walk into the restaurant, I scan the parking lot for familiar cars. I don’t know why we picked this spot for brunch. Their food is really good, but everybody, and I do mean everybody, from our church comes here on Sunday afternoons.
“I can’t wait to eat some of that French toast. They have the best maple syrup I’ve ever had,” I say as Kingston opens the restaurant door.
“It is sweet, but not as sweet as you,” Kingston says.
“You are pouring it on thick now!”
“I can’t help it, Vonne! I’ve been storing this up for a while. You should’ve said yes a long time ago.”
I take in a sharp breath when Kingston calls me Vonne. That was the nickname Luke had for me. I heard him call me that for twenty years before we divorced. I can hear his voice in my head. Vonne, get me something to eat. Vonne, you need to fix your hair, around here looking like a slave on a plantation.
“Is something wrong?” Kingston asks when I freeze up and pull my arm away.
“Could I ask you not to call me Vonne?”
Kingston nods slowly. “Did I take you someplace with that?”
“You did, and it wasn’t to a good place. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to expose you to my baggage so soon.”
“You wanted to ease it on me?” Kingston’s smile tells me that he understands my issues.
“I wish I didn’t have it at all! But yes, I wanted to ease it on you.”
“It’s all right, Yvonne. I can take it. Let’s go eat.”
I’m feeling really good about this date now. It was a good idea to finally say yes to Kingston. He is a good man. A good, patient man!
We choose a table, and of course, he pulls the chair out for me.
“I don’t even need a menu,” Kingston says. “I know exactly what I want. The brunch buffet.”
“I always get the buffet, too,” I say.
The waitress comes to the table with a huge smile on her face. Her name is Rosa, and I see her all the time when I’m here with Pam and Taylor. We’re regulars.
“Hey, Ms. Yvonne! I see you aren’t here with your girls today, h
uh?”
“No, I’m here with a friend. Kingston meet Ms. Rosa, and Ms. Rosa meet Kingston. He’s the choir director at our church.”
“Oh, for real! You kicking it with the choir director, Ms. Yvonne?”
Kingston and I burst into laughter. “I hope she’ll kick it with me!” Kingston says. “Can we kick it at our age?”
“You can kick it at any age!” Rosa says. “Y’all want the buffet, or do you need menus?”
“We will have the buffet. Thank you,” Kingston says.
“Okay, well, I’ll bring some juice and coffee. Holla if you need anything,” Rosa says.
“Let’s eat!” Kingston says as Rosa walks away.
Oh no! No. No. No! The last people I wanted to see on my first date with Kingston are here at the restaurant. Rhoda and Rochelle. And they haven’t had a good piece of gossip to chew on in a minute, so they’re chomping at the bit!
“Well, what do we have here?” Rhoda says as she and Rochelle approach the table.
“What do we have here?” Rochelle echoes.
I roll my eyes and shake my head. “You have two people about to get some brunch. Excuse us. The buffet is calling.”
Rhoda says, “Wait a minute, Sister Yvonne. You don’t have to be all like that. We just came over here to say hello. We saw our sister and brother in Christ, and we wanted to extend the right hand of fellowship.”
The right hand of fellowship? I don’t believe this. They are worse than the paparazzi. My and Kingston’s date is going to be in the church bulletin next week. Or worse, we’ll be on the prayer list.
“We had a long service today, and we’re really hungry, sisters,” Kingston says. “Maybe we can chat after we eat.”
Rhoda looks Kingston up and down and then turns to Rochelle. “Is he trying to dismiss us?”
“I think he’s hungry,” Rochelle replies.
“Oh, for goodness’ sakes! Can we please go to the buffet?” I say as I take Kingston by the hand and step around those two nosy heffas.
Don't Tell A Soul Page 5
