by Natalie Ann
She let out a shaky laugh. “I’m not trying to give mixed signals.”
“Yet you’re doing a great job at that. Want to tell me what is going on?”
“I don’t know.”
“Sure, you do. Just tell me. I’d like to think you know me well enough that I wouldn’t push or pressure you.”
She ran a hand through her hair. “See, that’s the problem. I don’t really know you that well.”
What did she mean by that? “I think we’ve been very well acquainted.” More than he’d been with other women.
“Physically, sure. But not mentally. Not emotionally.”
He waited a moment, processed what she said, and then asked, “Do you want to get better acquainted on an emotional or mental level?”
“Do you?” she asked.
“I asked you first.”
“We aren’t going to get anywhere playing these games,” she said, standing up and walking to the fridge, then grabbing a bottle of water.
That she felt comfortable enough to help herself made him want to point out she knew him better than she wanted to admit. But he stayed silent and let her take the next step.
“I don’t recall saying I was playing a game,” he said when the silence started to get to him. It was probably only five seconds of quiet, but that was enough for him to start talking.
“I know. Yes,” she said.
“Yes to what?” At this point he wanted everything spelled out clearly.
“Yes,” she said. “I want to get to know you more. Before we…” She was waving her hands back and forth. “Oh, forget that motion. Before we get naked again. I want to try this the traditional way. If you want to?”
“I do. I can get on board with that.”
“Really?” she asked, looking more surprised than he expected.
“Sure.”
“We live states away from each other,” she pointed out.
“There are planes, trains, and automobiles. Plus, we both know how to use a computer and our phones.”
“I don’t know when I could get time away to see you. Or go see you.”
“It sounds to me like you’re making arguments where there doesn’t have to be any. I can fly here pretty much anytime I want or need. I’ve been here more times than I can count since Nick moved. Just like he flies back to Richmond for a few days each month. It’s easier than you think.”
“True. Okay, then what’s the next step?”
“This is sad. What I’m about to say is very, very sad. But you and I are almost too much alike.”
“How’s that?” she asked.
“I need a plan, too. But I’m thinking for once we don’t try to plan this. We just let it go where it takes us. Maybe it’ll be more fun that way.”
“Maybe. Or drive us both insane.”
“That too,” he said, walking forward and stopping in front of her. He placed his hands on her cheeks and dropped his lips to hers. “See? Easy.”
***
But it wasn’t easy, Amber thought.
She’d taken a step she wasn’t sure she was going to take until the words were out of her mouth.
Actually, until she forced herself to break that kiss. Because she was seriously ready to unbutton his shirt and pants to the way they were when she walked in.
She wouldn’t have stopped there, though. She would have kept going until there was nothing left covering him.
Only this time, she told herself to not be reckless for once. That she’d been reckless way too many times in her life.
The last time had dire consequences. Ones that she’d struggled to live with even to this day.
She fully expected Zach to balk at her idea, but he hadn’t. Maybe because all she could think about was her mother lecturing her about buying milk from a store when you can get it free from the cow. Or something along those lines.
The lectures all blended together in her mind. Too many to count, too many disappointments in people’s eyes, and too much worry in her own.
For once, she wanted to say she was thinking something through. That she was trying to be responsible in her personal life, not just her career.
The truth of the matter was, that was the only thing she really took seriously. She put everything she had into her education and her job. She focused on it so much that she needed the break, and ended up doing stupid things during those breaks.
Now it was time to stop those thoughts and feelings of guilt, or at least try and see if she could make someone proud. If she could stop being looked at as the wild one of the family. Or even the town.
As the girl that never wanted to conform and always rebelled.
To stop being such a letdown in her parents’ eyes.
Maybe she could make herself proud for once, too.
Her steps were lighter on her way to the car, but her body ached. It ached in a way that only Zach had been able to heal and because of that, if she didn’t try to put some effort into this, she feared she’d always be alone.
Water and Bubbles
Zach watched Amber walk out the door, wondering what the hell just happened.
He wasn’t often taken by surprise, but tonight he was.
No, he wasn’t surprised she’d showed up at his door. He’d actually expected that. But he was surprised she seemed so unsure of herself.
There wasn’t much of the woman he’d met weeks ago here tonight. The woman who laughed and smiled like life was an adventure and she was there for the ride, damn the consequences.
A woman who snuck out in morning without a word.
He still didn’t believe her reasoning for that, either.
Did he think what they had was intense? Of course. Did it scare him a little? Sure. Not that he’d admit that to anyone right now.
Most of all, that intensity just made him want to continue on with her. See what they had, see if it was real, and see where it went.
He was at least glad she seemed to be thinking somewhat the same thing. Maybe. If he could figure her out.
He heard his phone buzz on the coffee table and thought—hoped—it was her.
When he picked it up, he saw it was his grandmother asking him to call. Since she didn’t often text, he figured he’d better find out what was going on.
“Hi, Grandma,” he said when she answered on the first ring. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes,” she said, her voice low. That was the first sign she wasn’t telling the truth.
“Are you alone?” He heard a door shut, a bit of silence, and then another door.
“Now I am. I just slipped out to the shed. I didn’t expect you to call me so quick.”
He laughed, just picturing his grandmother with stealth-like moves sneaking through the backyard, her head turning left and right looking for his grandfather.
“What did Grandpa do this time?”
“It’s not him. It’s your mother.”
Just what he needed to put another damper on his night. “What this time?”
“She showed up a day earlier than I thought.”
“Why is that odd? It’s only a day.”
“Because she normally can’t get time off of work…and yet she did.”
The sad part was he wasn’t sure where his mother worked, nor did he know one way or another if she had trouble getting time off.
“Maybe she took the day off to spend more time with you.”
“No, she did it hoping you’d be here.”
“Well I’m not.” That was why he left on Sunday to avoid this happening. “Did she ask where I was?”
“She did. Was real disappointed you weren’t here. And that you aren’t communicating with her.”
He snorted. “I never do. Why is this different?”
“I’m not sure. I’m just giving you a heads-up.”
“How long is she staying?” he asked.
“I thought she was leaving this weekend. Or I’d hoped.”
“Meaning?” he asked, starting to get nervous.
“I heard the kids talking about not wanting to move, so I don’t know what is going on right now.”
“Grandma, don’t let her move in with you,” he said, his voice firm.
“I need to hear her out and find out what is going on in her life.”
He wanted to say more, but didn’t. He knew his grandparents always had his back, but his mother was their daughter. He couldn’t be that cold. Or as cold as he wanted.
“Let me know what’s going on when you find something out.”
“I will. Zach,” she said, and then paused when he didn’t answer. “You’ve always been a forgiving person, but you never give an ounce with your mother.”
“No,” he said. “I don’t. I’ve got my reasons.”
“Are you going to share them? Or is it just that she chose your stepfather over you?”
“He’s not my stepfather. And no, it’s not that. Not now. When I was kid, it hurt. It sucked to know I wasn’t wanted and all but abandoned, but I’m an adult now.”
“You have always been wanted, Zach, and you were never abandoned.”
“Wanted by you and Grandpa, but not my mother. It’s not the time to talk about this either,” he said, knowing he didn’t want to get into it right now. Maybe never. He always avoided these conversations.
“You’re right. I’ll let you go. I’ll keep in touch and let you know if I find anything else out. And, Zach, you were meant to be ours. Whether you want to believe it or not, you will always be our child. You will always come first.”
“Thanks, Grandma, but I don’t want you to have to choose. I’m a big boy. I can handle it.”
“You can, but you shouldn’t have to.”
Zach hung up the phone, wondering what his mother was up to now, and thankful he was states away.
The one thing he learned was you could run, but you could never hide. The past always came back to haunt you.
A few hours later, he sat back and picked up his phone. The phone he’d been ignoring for the last hour. He responded back to whatever messages he felt couldn’t wait and then decided to compose another one.
What are you doing right now? He typed to Amber.
A full minute went by that seemed more like an hour. It has something to do with water and bubbles.
Okay, this just got interesting. Are body parts getting wet?
That is usually what happens with water and bubbles.
Are you touching…things?
With my hands.
Lots of images were flooding his brain. What a way to take his mind off of things he’d rather not deal with. Are you working hard to get…clean?
That’s normally the point, isn’t it?
His jeans were starting to get a touch tight, so he leaned back on the couch and adjusted himself as best he could. Do you spend a lot of time in water and bubbles?
Not as often as I should, unfortunately.
His type of girl. He had a fond appreciation for a bubble bath. I could always help you with that.
Mmm that would be awesome. Help is always accepted and appreciated.
Give me your address and I could be right over.
I wish I knew before, but I’m almost done. Hang on a minute. Almost there.
He was throbbing now, almost in pain. Maybe he shouldn’t have started this conversation.
Yet on the other hand, it was fun and exciting and a little bit dirty.
He waited for what seemed like five hours, and knew it was no more than a minute. He didn’t have to look at the time on his screen to know, either.
There. All done. I just needed to dry my hands before I picked the phone back up.
You’re evil.
I am that. She typed back, then added. You love it.
I do. Very much so. He was pretty sure he was going burst at this point.
Next time I’ll gladly let you help.
She wasn’t doing much to help his situation. I might need to get some bubble action going myself right now. You can help me if you want.
I’m good for now. The little smiley face she added was just torture.
I don’t remember you ending at one…
I tend to rush through it when I’m on my own. It’s not the same…you know.
Agreed.
This texting thing is working out just fine. I guess you were right.
Just fine for her, but not so much for him at the moment. Glad to know.
Thanks for getting me through. Now that my dishes are clean I can go relax.
Seriously! Dishes?
Yes. Did you think it was something else?
Yep, evil. All the way through. Nope, I think I’ll go do my own dishes right now too. Talk to you tomorrow.
He tossed his phone on the table and stood up, then made his way into the bathroom and turned on the shower. Dishes—that better be a new word for it.
Play It Safe
Amber checked the cottage first thing Wednesday morning before Madison flew out for home. Jill would be staying for a few more days and having the holidays here.
“Call me if you notice anything or have any questions,” Amber told Madison.
“I will. Thank you so much for everything. And if I can talk my hubby into more, you will be the first to know.”
Amber reached in and gave her a quick hug. “If you decide you want your follow up in three months with us, let us know. Otherwise, Max will talk with a local plastic surgeon if you have any concerns.”
“Thanks again. It’s been such a great experience.”
After she spoke with Jill one last time, she walked over to see Zach. Why? Because she’d had too much fun playing with him the night before.
She wondered what he’d say if he knew she really was in the tub last night when she was texting him. Nah, best if he didn’t know right yet.
She knocked on the door and then blew into her cupped hands. The air was brisk this morning.
When he didn’t answer, she knocked again and wondered if she’d be treated to him coming to the door half-naked again. That was why she was in the bubble bath to begin with last night.
No answer, and she thought maybe he was at Celeste’s getting breakfast. It just occurred to her that there wasn’t a single light on in the cabin.
Hoping to get breakfast for the office out of the deal—along with a sneak peek at Zach—she walked to the main house where the kitchen could be seen brightly through the windows.
“Morning,” she said to Celeste when she opened the back door. No sign of Zach.
“Good morning,” Celeste said, turning away from the oven.
“Are those cinnamon buns?” Amber asked, knowing the answer and walking forward to inhale the scent more.
“They are. Cole put in a special request for when he got out of work this morning. He’s already been here and snatched six of them.”
“Six,” Amber said. These things were huge.
“Someone is craving them,” Celeste replied, giggling.
“Rene could probably put three away on her own right now.”
“I think that’s why Cole took as many as he did. He normally eats two.”
“I can’t believe how tiny Rene still is. It doesn’t seem fair she can eat like that and all that is growing is her belly. Is she sure there is just one in there?”
“The doctors have watched carefully since twins run in the family. They insist it’s only one. Just one big baby boy.”
“Considering Cole’s size, it makes sense.”
“Are you looking for some breakfast this morning for the office? Or looking for someone in particular.”
There wasn’t much use lying at this point. Celeste would know anyway. She always seemed to know what was going on around her and what was in people’s heads.
“Both,” Amber said, smiling brightly as Celeste started to box up the buns. “Give one less since Rene got hers at home.”
“I don’t think that will work any more than you do. If my soon-to-be nephew wants another one, I wa
nt him to have it.”
Amber nodded. Celeste was going to be the best auntie there ever was, she could tell already.
“Have you seen Zach this morning? He didn’t answer when I knocked.”
Celeste grinned at her. “He’s probably sleeping. He got to bed late last night.” She stopped and walked to the coffee machine. “You’ve got time, would you like a cup?”
“Sure.” Amber sat down at the island while Celeste grabbed a mug and poured. “How do you know he worked late?”
“He ended up at the house with Nick and Caleb around eight last night and didn’t leave until close to midnight. I woke up around three and Caleb was still in his office. I went to check on him and he was mumbling about Zach driving him insane, and then tossed his phone on the desk.”
“I’m glad he didn’t come to the door then. I would have felt bad waking him.”
“So what is going on with you two?” Celeste asked.
“I’m not quite sure at the moment.”
Celeste nodded. “What do you want to be going on, then?”
“Would you be shocked to know I’m not any clearer there either?”
“It’s not like you to be indecisive.”
“It’s not,” Amber agreed. “Which is why I think I’m struggling so much with it.”
“There is more to Zach than meets the eye. Just keep that in mind at all times.”
“What does that mean?” Zach had seemed pretty straightforward to her for the short time she’s known him.
“It means Zach is like you.”
“I’ve heard that a few times already,” Amber said, pausing to sip her coffee. She really wished she knew how it was possible everything Celeste touched tasted twenty times better than anything else.
“Then you know there is more to you than meets the eye, too.”
Not many people ever said that to her face, but it was true. Then again, Celeste had known Amber most of her life. Though Celeste didn’t have all the details of things, she knew enough.
“That’s my little secret,” Amber said, trying to play it cool like she always did.
“Not as much of a secret as you think. I’ll give you one piece of advice, if you’d like.”
“Sure. I could use any advice anyone wants to give me right now.”
