"Well Sir, after having twin boys and a five year old at home, the wife and I don't get much time to ourselves. We have to seize the moment whenever we can. If you have to give me a ticket for making out with my wife, so be it, but if loving her is wrong then I don't want to be a right."
Oh yeah, he really said that.
The cop cocked his eyebrow and let out a laugh. "I have four girls. To be honest, I can't tell you the last time I had a whole day to spend with my wife."
"Yeah, we are on our way to get all of our shopping done in one trip. I got carried away with hunting season this year and now she tells me how much we have to do before the family gets here." His sarcasm made me want to punch him. Why did guys always find it easier to blame everything on their wives instead of saying that it was partly their fault?
"Did you hear about that fella that got the eighteen pointer on opening day?" When the man started talking to my husband about deer hunting, I knew we weren't going to get a ticket.
"Yeah, yeah, I heard about it. In fact, my dad was showing everyone a picture of it at Thanksgiving."
For the next ten minutes Ty and the police officer talked about hunting. I played with my phone until the officer said his goodbyes and walked back to his car. Ty patted my leg. "Bet you thought I was going to get a ticket."
"I'm speechless. If that were a girl cop it would have gone differently."
"Oh, come on; let's get into the spirit of Christmas, Baby. Don't let some old cop ruin our day. Before he approached us, we were having a great time." He grabbed my hand and kissed it again. "I love you so much. Especially when you give me sex more than once a day. I feel like a kid at a candy shop."
“That sounds like a rap song.”
“Seriously, Baby, I do love you.”
I leaned over and puckered my lips waiting for him to kiss me. Once he kissed me back, I pulled away and smiled. "I love you too, even enough to agree to have hot sex with you on the side of the road. Let's get goin' we have a lot of people to buy for."
“Anything for your sweet ass.”
So after a pit stop that took nearly forty minutes, we were back on the road.
Chapter 4
Ty
Having a quickie in the family vehicle was probably a bad idea, but it didn’t stop us. I wasn’t about to tell Miranda, but I was scared shitless when I saw that cop knocking on the damn window. I thought for sure I would be facing a hefty fine and a court date. Thank God I lived in a small town where hunting and family could change a whole conversation.
It took a while for Miranda to really calm down. Even though she said she was fine in the car, it wasn’t until after we grabbed a bite to eat that she finally started being herself again.
Since we’d waited until the last freaking month to go shopping, things we wanted to get people were scarce. Luckily, Miranda enjoyed online shopping and got everything she could from her cell phone while we were at the damn mall. At first I thought it was a waste of time, but after seeing the crowds of freaking idiots in the mall, the less amount of time we had to spend there the better.
We still had a bunch to get, including new decorations for the tree and a bunch of things for the kids. Miranda wanted to surprise Van with her favorite chocolates that were only sold in our mall in North Carolina. Every year we bought my father a new stein for his collection and my mother loved anything with angels on it.
Miranda sat down and started going over the list of things we still needed to get. We were determined that we weren't going to go back out to shop. While watching all the weirdo people walking by us, I noticed a lingerie store and that is where I came up with my idea for the Christmas picture.
I patted my wife on the leg, grabbing her attention. "Baby, I'll be right back."
She looked at me and then to where I was looking and started shaking her head. "Well, you could have been a little more secretive about it, now I know what I'm gettin' for Christmas."
I leaned down and kissed my sexy wife. It was better she had nothing to do with this plan of mine, on account of her telling me it was a horrible idea. "Trust me when I say, you have no idea what you're getting for Christmas."
She cocked an eyebrow and smiled. "Should I be scared?"
I kissed her on the lips again. "I won't buy anymore whips if that's what you're asking." I kept walking away from her, toward the store. Once inside, like always, I was approached by a couple women asking how they could help me. Of course, after looking around I wanted something to give Miranda for after everyone left. I picked out a bodice that laced up the front, with matching panties. It was white with black lace all over it. The panties were going to be the most fun, being that they were crotchless. I found myself imagining how hot Miranda was going to look in the outfit and felt the woman that was helping me tapping me on the shoulder. "Sir, did you need anything else?"
I walked over to the holiday section and told her what I wanted. I even filled her in on my idea of how we were going to pose. I don't know if she was appalled or wishing she could join in on the fun.
Once I checked out, I found Miranda in the same spot I had left her. She looked down at all the things on the bench and laughed. "Please tell me you didn't buy the whole family lingerie?"
I grabbed some of our other bags and helped her up. "Don't worry about it. Everything I bought is totally comfortable."
For the next two hours we went from store to store, standing in longer lines each time. My wife never faltered as she stuck to her list and managed to get it all done. The car was full on the way home and we still had enough daylight to go unload everything and take Iz with us to get our tree.
Like always, we got everything done and walked over to my parents to get Iz and the boys saw us. We both had a problem with leaving them when they were reaching their arms out crying for us, so we spent a little time with them before sneaking out with their sister. This was the first year that we had decided to go cut down a Christmas tree.
I made the mistake of letting Iz be the one to pick out our tree. I think we circled the tree farm three times in total. At first it was cute how she put her little finger up to her face and walked around the tree studying each part of it. After the tenth tree, it just wasn't as cute. Miranda and I were both so exhausted from shopping that the last thing we wanted to do was walk around the lined rows of pine and spruce trees until our indecisive daughter made up her mind.
Finally, after bribing her with ice cream and chocolate, she made her choice.
I thought it was going to be easy to cut down the damn thing, so I walked over there looking all tough, but after my first couple swings I realized how wrong I was. Apparently, it was hard for my tired ass to hit the same spot each time I swung the axe.
Miranda was beside herself with laughter, making fun of me. "I think you should let Iz have a turn, Daddy."
"Very funny. Would you like to come give it a try, smart ass?"
I never should have asked...
Miranda pulled her hair into a ponytail and cracked her knuckles. "Let me show you how a country girl does it."
I rolled my eyes and acted like it didn't faze me, but I had a feeling she was going to show me up. That was one of the reasons that I loved her so much. She was so determined to always show me up and I loved the competition.
Iz and I sat back on a patch of moss and watched Miranda busting her ass to cut down our tree. After ten minutes, she had a nice chunk taken out of the trunk. Her face was red and she was sweating, even though it was kind of cold out. "Want to switch?"
"You just want to try again since I did so much better than you." She put her hands on her hips and waited for me to agree with her. I wasn't going to make it that easy for her. "I'd rather watch you. I mean, you're getting all hot and I'm enjoying watching you scrunch up that little face like when we're alone. It's so sexy."
My wife looked at our daughter and pointed behind her. "Bella, look at that squirrel." When our daughter turned to look for the squirrel, Miranda looked toward me an
d mouthed the words 'fuck you' and then she began chopping on the tree again.
Realizing that I was never going to hear the end of it, I got up and grabbed the axe out of her hand. "Why don't you take a break, Baby? I will take care of the rest." I kissed on her neck and she finally let go of the axe completely.
When she walked away I pinched her ass cheek, making her turn around and give me another dirty look. I liked it when she got angry. Her pretty face scrunched all up like she could really hurt something. It was so cute.
Miranda took Izzy to look for the invisible squirrel while I continued busting up the tree until it fell sideways onto the hard ground. My daughter had picked a tree farthest from our truck, so dragging it was also a pain in the ass, but I knew she would always remember us doing it.
On the way home I thought it would be cool to listen to Christmas music. Iz and I sang about bells and reindeer until we were all sung out. By the time we pulled up at the farm, Miranda was rubbing her temples like her head was about to explode. I knew that she was exhausted and having to deal with the boys wasn't going to be easy. "Why don't you go inside and run a bath while Iz and I bring in the tree and go get the boys. After the kids go to bed, I will come out and get all the gifts and carry them in so we can wrap them."
She leaned over and puckered her lips, waiting for me to kiss them. As I pulled away, she smiled with her eyes still closed. "You're awesome."
I touched my finger to her nose, making her open her eyes. "You can show me how awesome I am in bed tonight." I winked.
She opened the door and climbed out. "Maybe I will."
I unbuckled my seat belt and looked back at my daughter. I still remember looking back at her when she was just a little two year old. "You ready to help me, kiddo?"
"Can I help carry the tree, Daddy?"
We walked toward the back of the SUV and I climbed up on top to untie what was securing the tree on the roof. "You sure can. Just let Daddy get it down first. Stand back." I freed the tree and let it fall to the ground. Iz stood there like the good little girl she always was for me. "Grab your gloves and put them on so you don't mess up your hands Iz." She got her gloves and we carefully carried the tree toward the house. Conner came walking up to us and offered to help me get it in the house and Iz never argued. I was trying to hold all the weight myself, but I could tell that as much as she wanted to help, she was done with her efforts for the time being.
Conner and I got the six foot tree in the house without trouble and he took off to take a shower while Iz and I headed over to my parent's house to get the boys.
By the time we got back, Miranda was walking out of the house in her pajamas. She grabbed Jax while I grabbed Jake and we got them in their high chairs and started feeding them dinner. Izzy ran back over to my parents to get some kind of decoration she wanted to put on our tree. The boys were both in playful moods and were jabbering away as we attempted to feed them. We usually played this game where we would turn our heads and snap them back around really fast, startling them into a laughing fit. Miranda turned her head around right after giving Jax a bite of applesauce. She shot her head back in his direction and he laughed and spit at the same time, covering her face with his mouth full of food.
It was hilarious to watch.
Izzy came running in the door just as Miranda stood up to get cleaned off. She was dragging something behind her. "Hey, what did you bring over here now?" Miranda leaned down to take a look.
A long ass strand of berries was in our daughter's hands. "We made berry strands for the tree. Mimi says it is a tradition."
I grabbed the strand and handed one end to my wife. She smiled and looked at me, while talking in a whisper. "Are we really going to put fresh food on the tree with the dog in here?"
Ever since we'd gotten Iz the puppy for her birthday, she'd been a terror. She was potty trained easily; in fact she was good except for the fact that she had some kind of anxiety disorder if you left her alone in a room. There was no way you could leave her in the house when you went somewhere. The first time we'd done it, we came home to a disaster. The trash was ripped out and scattered through the whole house. She'd jumped up on the sink and tore up all of our toothbrushes. She shredded three pair of Miranda's underwear out of the hamper, which she still does when she gets ahold of them. I find that weird and intriguing at the same time. I also had a dog that would do that to all of our underwear in my house.
Anyway, the dog goes crazy.
The idea of hanging something that smells remotely edible didn't seem like a good idea at all. Unfortunately, I knew it would be too hard for our daughter to understand that, although she worked her butt off, we wouldn't be able to have them in the house. So I did what every good dad would do. "They will be fine on the tree. It already smells of pine, so I'm sure the dog won't notice the berries."
"I hope you're right, Ty."
Once the boys were fed, we spent the next hour in the living room decorating the tree. Even Conner came out and helped pick Iz up so she could put the angel on the top. With the tree looking beautiful, I grabbed the kids and we put them all to bed, making sure they were tucked in and satisfied.
I grabbed my wife's hand as we walked down the hallway. "I remember you saying I was going to get some more loving tonight."
Miranda shook her head and just kept walking.
I would just put that in my collections of rain checks.
Chapter 5
Miranda
I owed my husband big for letting me get a bath and take a little break. We were both so exhausted from our day of shopping, but I managed to get everyone on the list taken care of.
While I was in the tub, I thought about everything we had actually done in one day. Then my mind went to Ty going into the lingerie shop.
Now, I was all for dressing in sexy things, but he came out with three bags and lingerie doesn't really take up much space.
He was up to something and I wasn't sure I even wanted to know what it was.
My husband could piss someone off by just being in the same room with them. He instigated people until they wanted to punch him, and he somehow got off on getting them roused up. Ty was the funniest person I knew and I appreciate his humor much more than anyone else. A while back, when we were having problems, it's how I knew something was bothering him. He stopped joking around all together.
This new sneakiness was going to drive me crazy, except this time, I was sure it was nothing that would hurt me.
After the tree fiasco, I decided that next year we needed to buy an artificial tree or get one that was precut. It didn't help that Bella had picked a tree that had a super thick trunk. Ty chopped at the tree with our dull ass axe until he looked like he was going to pass out. I don't know where he even got it from. It had a blade that looked like an inch thick butter knife and it looked to be over a hundred years old.
My arms felt like Jell-O by the time I climbed in that tub. I'd tried to show off and cut the tree down myself, except all along I knew I wasn't going to be able to actually do it. Bella sat there the whole time so excited about what we were doing that I couldn't even act frustrated about it. Just seeing that twinkle in her eye made it all worth it.
After feeding the boys I sat down on the couch, while Ty tucked in Bella. The next thing I knew, I was being carried to our bed. My husband was sweet like that. He never woke me up and made me walk, even when I was pregnant, he still carried my fat butt to bed. I was still semi awake when he climbed into bed next to me, so I nestled my body against his and fell fast asleep.
Ty and I had to get up with the boys twice overnight. I'd almost converted all the way over to formula. The boys both had teeth and they had a problem with biting me while I tried to feed them. One time last week, it drew real blood.
With Ty working on the farm, he never complained about getting up at night and helping me with the boys. In fact, some nights he would race in and calm them before I could even get out of bed. I never saw a man that loved being a fath
er the way Ty did. I think if he could have been a stay at home parent he would have been.
Since my own father had died when I was so young, some of my favorite memories were of him. I hoped that one day my children would look back and appreciate what a great father they had.
When I woke up the next morning, Ty was carrying the bags from our car into our bedroom closet. Bella was still too young to think about snooping around, but we didn't want her to know what Santa was bringing her. After getting the puppy for her birthday, she had taken things up a notch and asked for a pony. We'd taken the horses to Kentucky, but the stalls and the corral were still intact, so Ty agreed she was old enough to have a small pony.
It just so happened that one of the neighbor farmers had an older pony that had been his daughters. She had moved away after college and nobody played with it anymore. Ty and I both agreed that we wanted her to start out on a pony that was used to being played with and ridden.
When he took me over to the guy’s house to take a look at it, I fell in love right away. The horses name was Scotch, for its obvious brown colored coat. His mane and tail were a blonde shade and it accented his darker body. He was ten years old and had been around little girls since he was just a colt.
I particularly liked how when we went to take a look at him, he walked right up to us and let us pet him. I stuck my hand down at his mouth and he never snipped at me. He didn't have shoes, but his hooves were nice and clean and had recently been treated. His weight looked perfect and I couldn't see a single rib on his body. When we walked away he started neighing at us, like he wanted us to come back.
Ty didn't even have to ask my decision when we left that fellows farm. He was already dialing him as we pulled off his property to tell him he would be by the next day with the money. The guy was thrilled that Scotch was going to be living so close. He said he wouldn't be surprised if his daughter showed up one day to visit her old pet.
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