Star of His Heart

by Brenda Jackson

  “I want this,” she said, reaching out and groping that part of him. She heard his low growl and glanced up. His eyes could not hide the desire she saw in them.

  “Sweetheart, I’m going to make sure you get everything you want.” And then he swept her off her feet and into his arms and carried her over to the bed.

  There was something about Rachel’s scent that got to him every time. It was an intimate fragrance that seemed to beckon him on a primitive level that even now had every muscle in his body rippling in a way he found tormenting.

  He undressed her and then undressed himself. He had seen the way she blushed when he tossed several condom packets on the nightstand and took a step away from the bed to put one on. She watched him sheath himself and the thought that she was doing so sent a rush of blood to his loins.

  Silence dominated the room and for a heartfelt moment he wished some type of music was playing to set the mood. Too late now. But next time…

  And there would be a next time. He was going to make sure of it. Like he told her, this was their place. When he’d made the arrangements on Monday, it had been with her and only her in mind. He hadn’t wanted any other woman in that bed with him.

  He flinched at the thought, like he always did when his mind would begin thinking of more than sex between them. During those times, he would do whatever was needed to get his thoughts back in check. The only reason he and Rachel were drawn to each other was their intense sexual chemistry. And they were well aware that the attraction could never go beyond what they were sharing now. Neither of them had plans of ever falling in love.

  He moved back toward the bed and she shifted on her haunches and met him, reaching out and taking hold of his throbbing erection. She tilted her head back and stared into his eyes for a long moment. Something was passing between them, and he felt it in the hands holding him as well as in the eyes locked with his.

  “Tomorrow will we be able to pretend tonight didn’t happen?”

  Her question broke the silence. “Yes, it’s going to be hard but we’ll manage it.”

  She leaned up and licked the side of his face. “You think so?”

  “Hell, I hope so, but I’ll be the first to admit, every time I see you on the set, I want to tear your clothes off.”

  He heard her snort at that. “You would have a hard time convincing me of that with that love scene you did today.”

  He lifted a brow. Love scenes were staged and she was well aware of that. Surely she didn’t think any part of them meant anything to him. He was simply following the script. Did he hear a bit of jealousy in her voice?

  “Then I need to do whatever it takes to erase that scene from your mind,” he said, and for emphasis he reached out and pulled her closer toward him.

  He felt the shiver that passed through her and, in response, a slew of emotions flowed through him, nearly taking his breath away. A need for her filled him to capacity, and for a moment he could imagine her with him even when he was in his eighties.

  At the thought, he went momentarily still. Where had that come from? He knew there was no way he could consider anything with her beyond this affair.

  He reminded himself of that again as he captured her mouth with his and lowered her body to the bed.

  There was something about being pressed into the mattress by the man you wanted. A man who was holding her gaze as he entered her slowly, as if he was savoring the journey.

  The last time they’d made love he had taken her hard and fast, and now the slowness was driving her mad. She could only ask, “Why?”

  He knew what she was asking and said throatily, “There’s no rush. We have plenty of time and I want to take things slow, draw it out and make you scream. A lot of times.”

  She could feel the hardness of him grow inside of her and knew he intended to make some point. Being the skilled lover he was, he’d succeed in making all his wishes come true.

  Chapter 12

  “Quiet on the set!

  “Take one!

  “Action!”

  Rachel fought back the rush of jealousy as she watched yet another love scene being shot between Dr. Tyrell Perry and Dr. Sonja Duncan. Did Ethan have to appear to be enjoying it so much?

  Usually she stayed in the trailer working with the actors, but today she decided to venture out and would be the first to admit a part of her had wanted to see Ethan. More than once he had accused her of hiding out in the trailer, so today she had decided to be seen.

  Although, she thought as a smile touched her lips, hiding out in the trailer hadn’t stopped him from seeking her out on occasion and making the find worth his while. He had introduced her to quickies. She didn’t want to think about the risk they took of someone discovering their secret. So far no one had, and she was thankful for that.

  It had been a week since that night when they’d started their secret rendezvous. Most of the time they would meet up at their hideaway haven but on occasion he would come to her place. So far he was still outsmarting the paparazzi.

  She smiled, thinking about how Ethan had bought her a disguise—a honey-blond wig and green contacts. And because she was a makeup artist, it hadn’t been difficult to add her own camouflage to make herself unrecognizable when they’d made a decision to branch out beyond the bedroom to grab something to eat. They had even risked going to a movie together.

  On more than one occasion she had found herself thinking just how a normal relationship with him would be, one where they wouldn’t have to sneak around to be together. But she knew such a thing wasn’t possible.

  “Cut!”

  The production crew rushed around trying to get the props changed for another taping, and it was then that Ethan glanced over at her. When he winked and smiled, she couldn’t help smiling back. Last night they had spent the night together at their place, and he had surprised her by having an easel with art supplies waiting for her when she had arrived. After having made love, he reclined on the bed while she painted him, something he had surprised her by agreeing to do. It would be her own personal painting of him in all his naked splendor to be shared with no one.

  She had returned to the trailer when her cell phone went off. Caller ID indicated it was Charlene. “Yes, Cha?”

  “I know you don’t read the tabloids so I feel I should give you the scoop.”

  She raised a brow. “About what?”

  “Ethan. He’s driving the paparazzi crazy by eluding them every chance he gets. They’ve begun wondering what’s going on with him and who the woman he’s intent on hiding is.”

  Rachel felt a knot in her stomach. “Do they have any idea? Did they mention a name?”

  “No, but they have vowed to find out, so you might want to cool things with him for a while.”

  Rachel began nibbling on her bottom lip. Yes, that would be best, but it would be hard to do.

  “The media can be relentless when they want to find out something,” Charlene added.

  Rachel knew that to be true. “Thanks for keeping me in the loop. I appreciate it.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  Rachel drew in a deep breath. She had few options and knew there was only one thing that she could do. Regardless of whether she liked it or whether she was ready for it to happen, their affair had run its course. “I’m going to talk to him.”

  “And if the two of you meet up somewhere to have this talk, you might want to be looking over your shoulder. Disguise or no disguise, the two of you will have the media hounds on your heels for sure.”

  Ethan glanced in his rearview mirror. He was being followed. A deep frown set into his features. He’d been trying to elude the guy now for a full hour without any success.

  He was to meet Rachel at their place and he couldn’t do so as long as this reporter was still on his tail. Even switching cars and donning his disguise hadn’t helped. This guy was on to him and seemed intent on letting him know it.

  When his cell phone rang, he almost snatched it off his be
lt and his frown deepened when he saw the caller was Curtis. He had been trying to avoid his agent for a week or so now. “Yes, Curtis?”

  “Damn, Ethan, are you trying to mess up a good thing?”

  Ethan glanced into his rearview mirror, getting more agitated by the minute. He needed to get rid of this reporter so he could hook up with Rachel at their scheduled time. “What are you talking about?”

  “The tabloids. You’ve become elusive over the past few weeks, annoying the hell out of several tabloid reporters who even claim you’ve purposely given them the slip.”

  Ethan rolled his eyes. “And?”

  “And they are wondering why and just who you’re trying to hide. Someone has connected you to a nameless married woman and has vowed to uncover her identity.”

  Ethan’s hand tightened on the steering wheel. That was not what he wanted to hear. He of all people knew how tabloid reporters could make a pest of themselves more so than usual when they thought they were on to a story.

  “I’d like to see them try to uncover anything,” he said, almost in a growl, knowing he would do whatever it took to protect Rachel’s identity.

  “So you’re admitting to being involved with a married woman?”

  “I’m not admitting to anything, but if I were, it would be my damn business,” he responded.

  “Not here in Hollywood, Ethan, and not while we’re trying to build your career. You were doing a great job wining and dining the ladies, causing others to take notice and earning the title of this town’s newest heartthrob. All of that is what we need to continue to build your image the way we want. I know how important that is to you.”

  Ethan pulled in a deep breath. Yes, it had been important to him at one time, but now…

  “And in that same vein, I have a suggestion for a date for you on Saturday night.”

  Curtis’s words pulled Ethan’s concentration back into the conversation. “Excuse me?”

  “I said that I have a suggestion for a date for you on Saturday.”

  Ethan frowned. “What are you talking about, Curtis?”

  “I’m talking about Faith Pride. I got a call from her agent who suggested it might be a good idea if the two of you attended the event together.”

  “I know nothing about an event next Saturday night.”

  “Sure you do,” Curtis insisted. “I sent you the invitation with a mailing confirmation so I know you got it.”

  He might have gotten it but, like the rest of his mail, he hadn’t opened it. His time and the majority of his attention had been given to his sexy pixie, with no regrets. He looked back in his rearview mirror. The man was still there. Damn.

  “I’m not going anywhere Saturday night, Curtis.”

  “What? You can’t be serious, Ethan. You have to go. You’re hot news and expected to be there. If I didn’t know better I’d think you didn’t give a damn about your career anymore. I assume you still want one, right?”

  “Of course I do!”

  “Good, but it sounds like you have a distraction and that isn’t good. Get rid of her.”

  “Come again?”

  “I said get rid of her, Ethan. I don’t know who she is and frankly I don’t care. She’s interfering with your life in a negative way. Your actions in keeping her a secret mean she isn’t someone you want to be seen with.” Curtis paused a moment then said, “Oh, hell, please tell me the person is a she and not a he.”

  Ethan fought the urge to tell his agent just where he could go. Instead he said, “Bye, Curtis.”

  “Hey, you didn’t answer me.”

  “And I don’t intend to. If you don’t know the answer to that then it’s time I start looking for another agent.”

  “Wait, Ethan, I think we—”

  Angrily Ethan clicked off the phone. He then glanced back in his rearview mirror and saw the bastard was still on his tail. Deciding he’d had enough, he figured it was time to seriously lose this guy. Increasing his speed, he darted in and out of traffic before making a quick exit off the interstate, only to make a quick right and then a quick left into the parking lot of a car wash.

  He smiled, thinking it was his lucky day since there weren’t many cars around and immediately drove around the side of the bay. A glance in his rearview mirror showed his stalker speeding by. Backing up, Ethan quickly pulled out and headed back toward the interstate, satisfied for the time being that he’d lost his tail.

  Rachel continued to pace the bedroom floor. Ethan had called to say he was on his way but would be late due to “unforeseen circumstances.” He hadn’t elaborated.

  She paused by the bed and drew in a deep breath, remembering her conversation with Charlene. Rachel’s common sense was basically telling her that continuing to take risks at this point would be acting irresponsibly. She was an intelligent woman and Ethan was an intelligent man. They had enjoyed each other’s companionship but both fully understood that they could not have a future together of any kind. And that was where their similarities ended. Their connection over the past three weeks had only been physical. He didn’t love her and she didn’t love him.

  Then why was the thought of not being with him, not sharing stolen moments any longer, causing her heart to ache?

  She began moving again, pacing the floor. He would know something was bothering her the moment he saw her. For one thing, she still had her clothes on, and usually if she was the first to arrive, she would be naked in the bed waiting on him.

  She turned when she heard the sound of footsteps and felt the fluttering in her chest when the door slowly opened. She couldn’t deny the excitement and joy she felt when her gaze met his blue-gray eyes. It was the same moment of elation she felt whenever she saw him.

  He closed the door and leaned against it, holding her gaze for a moment, and then he began slowly unbuttoning his shirt. She knew she should stop him, tell him what she’d heard and that they needed to talk about it.

  But she couldn’t now.

  Her hands automatically went to her skirt and undid the zipper, then slowly shimmied out of it before pulling her blouse over her head. She then kicked off her sandals and by the time they met next to the bed they were both completely naked.

  As they tumbled together on the bed, one thought ran through her mind. So much for talking.

  Chapter 13

  An hour or so later, a very satiated Ethan was stretched out in the bed with Rachel in his arms and their legs still entwined. Mentally he was ordering his heart rate to slow down, but it wasn’t listening. And his brain cells, which had gotten scrambled after a couple of back-to-back orgasms, were still a jumbled mess. But he didn’t mind. In fact, he couldn’t imagine it any other way. He was precisely where he wanted to be and was with the one person he wanted to share his time.

  He raised her hand to his lips to kiss it and in response she snuggled even closer to him. Her body felt warm all over, and he liked the feel of spooning her backside, cradling her hips.

  “So tell me,” he leaned down and whispered close to her ear. “Why were you still wearing clothes when I got here?”

  He noticed the exact moment her body stiffened and he tightened his arms around her. Only a man who had been a lover to this woman could detect at that moment she was bothered by something. He shifted his weight, turned her in his arms to face him and his eyes met hers.

  “What’s wrong, Rachel?”

  For a moment he wasn’t sure she would answer him, and then in a soft voice she said, “My friend Charlene called today.”

  He was sure there was more. “And?”

  “You were in the tabloids. It seems reporters are trying to figure out who’s your flavor of the month.”

  “They wouldn’t have to try and figure it out since I’d be glad to tell them, if you would let me.”

  She stared at him through long lashes, surprise showing in her eyes, and he understood why. This was the first time he’d ever suggested they take their affair public. The only reason he’d never done so was becaus
e he knew her feelings on the matter.

  “Ethan,” she breathed out in a regretful tone. “I can’t.”

  In other words, you won’t, he thought and fought back the frustration he felt. He thought about the party and knew he didn’t want to take any other woman but her. He pulled in a deep breath, wondering at what point he had decided he wanted more than a fling with her. When had sneaking around with Rachel become something he did only because that was the way she wanted it?

  “Okay, you can’t,” he said, trying to keep the sting from his voice. “What does a tabloid reporter have to do with you having your clothes on when I got here?”

  She turned her head to look at the painting of him that she had done and hung on the wall. It was a good thing they were the only ones with keys to this room in the building. He would hate for anyone to ever walk in and see that painting of him. She called it art; he thought of it as borderline X-rated. The only thing keeping him from being completely nude was the very thin piece of cloth that covered a certain part of his body at the juncture of his legs.

  “Rachel, you’re thinking too much again.”

  She returned her gaze to his. “Tabloid reporters are trying to figure out who you’re spending your time with. You and I know if they keep snooping then it’s only a matter of time before they find out, and I can’t let that happen, Ethan. I can’t risk being placed in the spotlight ever again. And then there’s my career I have to think about. I’ve worked too hard building myself as a professional in the industry to risk losing everything.”

  He pulled in a deep breath. Those damn reporters had definitely done a job on her when she was a kid for her to have this intense fear. He could just imagine the hell she went through. He pulled her tighter to him, trying to imagine life without her. He would still see her on the set but he had begun thinking of these interludes with her as their time. He looked forward to them. In a way, he needed them. They had stopped being just sexual escapades a while ago. There were those times like these where he would hold her in his arms and savor what they shared, both the physical and the emotional.