“You’re a traitor, dude,” Cas added.
Trev looked crestfallen. “I was never one of you. I was always undercover.”
Cas readjusted Dad on his shoulder. “You conned us.”
“I thought I was doing my job. I thought…” He blinked, regret pinching the corners of his eyes. “I hacked into the files here, and I think you were right. I started out like the rest of you, but somewhere along the line they made me think I was on their side. I thought I was working to save someone I loved. That’s what they told me. Being undercover was never supposed to last this long. I was as much a prisoner in that lab as you were.”
“Whose side are you on now?” I asked.
“No one’s. But I can help you get out of here.”
Nick released Trev and gave him a shove. “I’m not following you anywhere.”
“You’ll be stopped the second you enter the lobby.” He took a step, then paused. “Through this door”—he motioned behind him—“is a hallway that will lead to a parking garage. There’s a car there you can take.”
The boys looked doubtful.
I tugged at the hem of my shirt, the urge to move overwhelming. I wanted to get out of there. I wanted to look every inch of Sam over to make sure he was all right. And the longer I stood there listening to them argue, the longer it’d take me to get to Sam.
“We don’t have anything to lose at this point,” I said. “And for what it’s worth, I believe him.”
Nick snorted, but he hefted Sam over his shoulder again. “Fine, we’ll go. But if you screw us over again, I swear to God…”
Trev raised his eyebrows. “Let me guess: You’ll kill me?”
“Consider that a promise,” I answered and meant it. Trev shot me a look threaded with dejection, and I did the best I could to ignore it. “Show us the way.”
The car Trev led us to was a nondescript, smoky-gray sedan with tinted windows. The keys hung in the ignition, waiting.
With Trev’s help, we put Dad in the backseat and placed Sam next to him. Nick got behind the wheel and I went around to the other side, Cas on my heels.
“Wait.” Trev dug in his pants pocket and pulled out a black flash drive. “I don’t know if you want the information or not, but everyone’s files are on that drive. From start to finish. It might shed some light on the blank spots in your memories. I figure you deserve that much.”
“Thanks,” I said and took the offering.
Cas slapped Trev on the back, the hard sound of the contact echoing through the parking garage. “You’re still a dick.”
I went to duck inside, but Trev stopped me. All my senses went on alert. It said volumes about how quickly my relationship with him had shifted. I hated it. I hated what he’d done.
“Yeah?”
A bruise colored the skin around his left eye. He looked so tired and forlorn. “All those years… I wanted you to know…”
“Come on!” Nick growled.
Trev moved in closer, his head down as if the words he was about to say were too raw and true to face. “You really were the bright spot of that lab. I wanted you to know that. Whatever I said or did, it was real, even if my identity wasn’t.”
“You were my best friend.” I let all the tension flood out of my shoulders. “I can’t ever look at you the same. Ever.”
“I know.”
I wrapped him in a hug, catching him off guard. He stumbled backward before leaning into me and squeezing. “Take care of yourself,” I said.
“You, too. They won’t stop coming after you, you know.”
Now that Connor was dead, I wasn’t sure who “they” were, if Trev meant Riley, or someone higher up. At the moment, I didn’t really care. I tipped my head in a silent good-bye before sliding in the back beside Sam and taking his limp hand in mine.
“I’ll open the exit door,” Trev called, “and you’ll be on your own.”
“Sounds swell to me,” Nick muttered, turning the engine over.
Trev punched in a code at the exit. The garage door rattled as it rose, gliding up its metal brackets. I held my breath, because while I wanted to believe in Trev, I half expected Riley to be waiting on the other side.
Daylight spilled in through the opening, gleaming off the polished hood of our borrowed sedan. Nick pulled the car up the slight concrete incline and merged into traffic.
Dad woke up with a wince ten miles later. He had one gunshot wound to the back. His skin was the color of egg whites and his eyes were ringed in black.
“Take me to a hospital,” he grumbled, and we didn’t argue. Nick found one in minutes.
“Do you want us to stay?” I asked as Cas went in search of a wheelchair.
Dad shook his head. “Get as far from here as you can.”
“But—”
“Anna.” He regarded me in a way that was more fatherly than ever before. “Go. Please.”
Cas appeared with the wheelchair. With the boys’ help, I got Dad out of the car and into the chair, though it took a lot of effort on everyone’s part. We were all damaged in some way.
“What’s the story?” Cas said. “Homeless man?”
Nick shoved up the sleeves of his shirt. “We found him that way?”
“I’ll do it,” I said, taking control of the chair. “You guys will be here when I get back?”
Cas grinned, showing his dimples. “We’re not going anywhere.”
The automatic doors opened with a whoosh, and it reminded me instantly of the entrance door to the lab in our old farmhouse. I wondered what would happen to it now. Where would Dad live? And what of my belongings? I couldn’t think of anything I’d miss. My sketches, maybe. That was about it.
“Excuse me,” I called out. “This man has been injured.” I figured injured was better than shot. I didn’t want them questioning me, too.
A woman behind the desk pushed a button on the elaborate call center and said, “The nurses are on their way.”
I came around to the front of the chair and took Dad’s hand in mine. “You’ll be okay?”
He inclined his head. “I’ll be fine. You go on now.”
“Will I ever see you again?”
“Do you really want to? After everything I did…”
“I want to. You’re all I know. You’ll always be my dad.”
He shook his head, avoiding looking at me, and I wondered if he felt like crying, too. “I never thought I’d hear you say that. Not after you found out the truth.”
A nurse rushed up, claiming the chair. “What happened?”
“He’s hurt. I… ah…”
“She found me lying in the street like this,” Dad said. “If it weren’t for this young lady, I might be dead.”
“Let’s get him to the ER.” Another nurse punched the door’s auto-open button. The wide door swung in, revealing the bustling ER beyond.
Dad winked as the nurses rolled him away.
Outside, I slid into the waiting car, next to Sam. His eyes were open a slit.
“You’re awake. Thank God. I don’t suppose I can talk you into seeing a doctor, too?”
“Cas can fix me,” he croaked.
Cas snorted. “I don’t know, dude. That could be dangerous. You might end up with fewer organs than when you started.”
As Nick pulled away from the curb, Sam threaded his fingers with mine. I smiled a real smile that touched every corner of my soul. Because the boys were back by my side. Because we’d made it. We were free.
35
THE BRITTLE GRASS CRUNCHED BENEATH me as I sat in front of the headstones in the middle of Port Cadia Cemetery. Leaves had collected at the bases of the massive stones and in the lone pot of dead flowers.
I read the names on the headstones over and over again.
CHARLES O’BRIEN
BELOVED HUSBAND AND FATHER
MELANIE O’BRIEN
BELOVED WIFE AND MOTHER
“Hi,” I said to the stillness, feeling weird, but somehow closer to them, my real pare
nts. “It’s Anna. It took me a long time to come back home. But I’m here.” I ran a hand down the raw edge of my father’s headstone, then patted my mother’s. “I wish I could remember you.”
I waited for something to come to me, for some old memory to dislodge itself from the deep hole the Branch had created. But nothing came. I didn’t even know what color my mother’s hair was. Or if my father had my hazel eyes.
Maybe I was expecting too much. Just seeing their final resting place was enough for now. I was here, and they were real, and that was at least a start. I had all the time in the world now to find out whom they had been, or if I had any other remaining family, maybe an aunt or uncle who could help to fill in the blanks.
Sam eased down beside me, still healing from the wounds he’d suffered two weeks earlier. His hair was longer and darker now, nearly matching the black of his thick canvas coat. It was early November and snow fell in soft flakes around us, not yet managing to stick to the ground.
“I found them,” I said.
Sam waved his hand in the air, signaling to the others that the graves had been found. Cas and Nick headed for the car parked outside the wrought-iron fence, leaving us alone.
“Do you think Dani has a gravesite?” I asked.
Sam looked outward, past the cemetery. “I don’t know. We can look into it.”
I nodded, feeling a pang of sadness for her. From what little information we’d found on the flash drive, we knew that she’d died right before Sam was moved to the farmhouse lab. We didn’t know how it happened. Another question left unanswered.
It was still odd to think of her as my sister, because I couldn’t remember a single thing about her. Instead, I thought of her as a long-lost relative I never knew, but who clearly meant a lot to Sam once. She must have been great in some immeasurable way.
“Now what?” I said, picking the leaves from the flowerpot, mentally promising myself I’d come back in the spring with something new. “Where do we go from here?”
We’d been staying in a motel in the Upper Peninsula the last few weeks while Sam healed, but we’d checked out yesterday. Stopping in Port Cadia on the way south had been Sam’s idea. “To give you closure,” he’d said, and now that I was here, I was thankful for it, but being in this town made me uneasy.
“We’ll find a place to settle for a while,” Sam said. “Something more permanent so we can sort through the rest of the information on the flash drive. We need to know if there are others out there like us, and if so, what the Branch plans to do with them.”
We’d started digging into the files immediately after we escaped the Branch. Already we’d gathered information on the Altered drug, as it was referred to in the files, and how it affected all of us. But there were hundreds of files. It’d take us a while to organize everything.
“And you’re sure that I’m not putting you in danger?”
Sam tilted his head to the side and gave me a look that said I was being absolutely ridiculous.
“Well”—I shrugged—“I wanted to ask rather than assume. With everything we learned, Nick wasn’t so far off. I am a liability, and maybe it’d be safer—”
“Stop.” He climbed to his feet.
I said a silent good-bye to my parents as Sam offered me his hand and hoisted me up. But even when I stood firmly on the ground, he didn’t let go.
“You’re not a liability. I read through the treatment file a dozen times. The control elements aren’t permanent.”
“But we don’t know how long they’ll last. Don’t you worry that the Branch might get to me and use me against you?”
He started walking and took me with him, our hands still entwined. “Even more reason for us to stick together. You’re the only person I trust. That’s not something you waste.”
I smiled. “You trust me more than Cas?”
“Cas would choose a case of beer over me.”
My laughter echoed through the cemetery. “That’s not true!” I brushed the hair from my face. “The others have your back.”
“Yet you were the one who saved my life.”
A warm feeling, like sunshine on bare skin, filled me. He was right, of course. I couldn’t argue that. I’d always cared for him, loved him even, but risking your life for someone changes things. It wasn’t just love. It was a million other things all woven together. Emotions I couldn’t even name.
When I said I would die for him, I meant it. And now I knew he’d risk his life for me, too.
A breeze kicked up, scattering leaves across our path. The snow was no longer soft but steely as it hit our faces. I moved closer to Sam. My hand grazed the hem of his jacket.
When we reached the end of a row of headstones, he slowed. We bumped shoulders. I felt him watching me. “What color would you use?”
A grin spread across my face as I glanced at him.
My gaze swept the sky. “Titanium white. A white so pure you can—”
He stopped midstride and nudged me toward him. With a brush of his finger, he tilted my chin up. Only the span of a few inches hovered between us. Snow melted on my face. The wind didn’t seem so cold anymore.
“Almost taste it?”
The gap closed between us and he pressed his lips against mine.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
My life has changed in so many crazy, amazing ways, and none of it would have been possible without the help of so many crazy-amazing people.
First, to my husband, JV, for never doubting me and for picking up the pieces when I failed again and again. Thanks for listening to my incessant rambling about abs, plot points, and perfect titles.
To my agent, Joanna Volpe, who is lightning-fast, who is always supportive, and who knows just what to say and when to say it. Without her, none of this would have been possible. I also suspect I would no longer be sane without her guidance and all-around kick-assery.
To my editor, Julie Scheina, who saw something in this book from the beginning and helped me make it tons better. Thank you for your wisdom, your kind words, and your unflinching support of hot guys.
Thank you to everyone else at Nancy Coffey Literary. Nancy, Sara, Kathleen, and Pouya. Thank you to the entire Little, Brown team, for being awesome in so many immeasurable ways, and for helping make this book shine.
To my beta readers: Holly Westlund, Robin Prehn, and Deena Lipomi. Especially to Deena, for her invaluable feedback and encouraging e-mails, and for being the best cheerleader EVER.
To my BFF, Stephanie Ruble, who has been with me from the beginning. We’ve traveled this road together. The adventure has only just begun.
Much love to Patricia Riley and Danielle Ellison, for knowing how and when to make me chuckle. Thanks for the revision cookies, the #hotboyswin tweets, and your unwavering friendship.
Thank you to my friends and family, for the love, encouragement, and support.
And a very special nod goes out to the WSB crew: Tracy, Diane, Jer, Vicki, Karen, Josh, and Adam. You were the best coworkers a girl could have asked for.
Lastly, to the entire writing community, thank you for being awesome. Writing a book is sometimes a lonely endeavor, and no way would I have survived this journey alone.
CONTENTS
Welcome
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter
28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Acknowledgments
Copyright
Copyright
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
Copyright © 2013 by Jennifer Rush
All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher constitute unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at [email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.
Little, Brown and Company
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First e-book edition: January 2013
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