by Lilly Black
“I love you so much, Evan,” he whispers, his lips pressed against the top of my head, his voice so low, it’s as if I’m reading his thoughts.
“Me, too,” I breathe, nuzzling into him, and for just these few, precious seconds, I put my fear of fate aside, knowing this is the memory I will carry with me always as my life’s most significant.
All the way home, I’m walking on air. I actually said those three little words, and when I pinch myself, I don’t wake up. Now, even though we had just had hours of amazing sex, all I want to do is get Cain into our bed to make love like we did yesterday afternoon, even if Nicole is home and we have to be quiet. When we enter the apartment, assuming that the light coming from under the guest room door means that she and Caleb are in there together, Cain and I creep down the hall as quietly as possible, but as we pass the guest room door, we hear faint sobs.
Cain’s eyes flash in anger, and I have to stop him from barging in.
“What did he do to her?” He growls protectively.
“Shhh! Whatever it was, you going in there is only going to make her feel worse,” I insist, and though he protests, I give him an impatient look and push him away. “Go!”
“Hey,” I say, cracking the door. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” Nicole says, hiding her face in her hands.
“It doesn’t sound like nothing,” I say as I sit beside her on the bed.
“We just…we decided not to…”
“Oh, Nic, I’m sorry.” I put my arms around, letting her cry, and when she is ready, she tells me what happened. Caleb offered to give her all that he could, but it wasn’t enough.
“I can’t be the other woman, Ev. I want to. I want to so bad it hurts, but I just kept thinking about Saturday night. I would never be the one to go to the country club. I would be alone on holidays - Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, too. The harpy gets all that. It isn’t fair!”
“I know,” I console her, “but there is one thing she can never have…” She looks up at me, hopeful. “His love. He hasn’t loved her for a long time.” I probably shouldn’t have put that idea in her head, but after Cain told me he loves me tonight, I’m just not my usual pessimistic self.
“She doesn’t love him either,” Nicole says. “Do you know how long it’s been since he had sex? Over a year! He has tried so hard to keep his vows that he has never even…”
“I know,” I interrupt her, “and do you know what that says about you? This man has put everything he has to making his marriage work, and you are the only woman who has ever made him question that. If he would get caught cheating, Nic, he stands to lose everything, yet he was willing to take that chance for you.” Her eyes light up as my words sink in. “I still think you made the right decision. He’ll never be the man you deserve until he can walk away from his marriage.”
“I know, but it’s just going to be so hard, Ev. I wish he had never kissed me.”
“At least you can always go pick up a hot guy and do something about your frustrations. Caleb can’t do anything about his.”
“He could pick up the Hope Diamond,” she says, and we laugh. She has stopped crying, but I know it’s not over. She’s going to hurt from this for a long time, and as long as I’m with Cain, she’ll always be reminded of what could have been. And Caleb will be reminded, too. I hope he hurts more.
September 24
“Oh, my God!” I hear Nicole call out Tuesday morning. She wanted to use my shower because it has more bells and whistles than the guest room bath, and since Lucy is driving her back home in a little while, I let her go first. Still in bed, I hear her and rush in to my closet to find her standing by the fainting couch holding my riding crop. Cain brought it back from the dungeon last night because I have tasked him with finding a case for it, but it didn’t even cross my mind that he would just leave it laying around in here with Nicole staying with us!
“It’s not what you think,” I say.
“Do you know how much this thing is worth?”
“It was just a joke gift,” I lie.
“No, it wasn’t. With this many perfectly sized and set, clear stones, this thing probably cost…”
“They’re not real.” I roll my eyes.
“Yes, they are,” she insists, coming toward me holding it with the studded end up. “Look!” she breathes heavily on the stones and thrusts it is my face. I have no idea what her point is.
“Just because they make you pant doesn’t make them real, Nicole,” I say dismissively.
“They’re real because they don’t fog up.”
“They’re probably just good fakes,” I say. “I don’t even think Cain would drop, what? $10,000 on a joke?”
“Try ten times that.”
“There’s no way.”
“Call and ask Cain,” she urges me.
“No. It doesn’t matter to me,” I say.
“It should, especially if you are going to just leave it laying around.” She makes a good point. “And if you find out for me, I won’t make a big deal over the fact that this pretty much proves that the list I found in our kitchen was no joke.”
…and then she makes an even better point.
“Fine.” I grab my cell phone and dial.
“Good morning,” Cain says with a surprised, you’re up early tone.
“Hey. Are you alone?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Because I wouldn’t want anyone to overhear.”
“I’m all ears,” Cain says, expecting something much more entertaining than what he is going to get.
“Don’t get excited. I’m just wondering what possessed you to leave the riding crop laying out on the fainting couch in my closet. Nicole found it.”
“Then Nicole was nosing around because it was in its box in your lingerie drawer.”
“I see.” I shoot her a dirty look. “Well, in any case, she has agreed to keep it to herself, but she did some breathing test that made her believe the diamonds are real. I tried to tell her…”
“They are real,” Cain says, making me gasp. “I am very serious about our equality, Evan, especially after last night.” An irrepressible smile spreads across my face.
“At least please tell me it didn’t cost the $100,000 she estimated.”
“I can’t remember,” he says stubbornly.
“Should it be in a safe somewhere?” I ask, suddenly very uncomfortable with this diamond-slathered frivolity.
“I doubt anyone would steal a riding crop, but just to be sure, I recommend that you keep it with the blindfold and tethers I gave you.” Cain laughs.
“Good idea,” I say, suppressing the urge to comment on what I would like to do with the blindfold and tethers tonight. “We can talk more about it when you get home.”
“I can’t wait,” he says, then he closes the call. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” I whisper, turning away from Nicole to avoid the awww on her face, and mercifully, she doesn’t say a thing about hearing me say the L word to Cain after I hang up.
“Nicole, you can’t tell anyone anything about this or the list you found. You know that, right?”
“I swear I’ll never tell anyone,” she vows, and just to drive the point home, I explain how secretive Cain is about this part of his life and how anyone privy to it has to sign an NDA.
“Did you sign one?” she asks.
“No. He broke that rule for me, but he may want you to sign one now.”
“If I do, will you tell me everything?”
“No,” I say, though I’m dying to brag to someone about how incredible the sex is, particularly how incredible last night was.
“Well, I’ll sign one anyway if it’s important to Cain, but either way, I promise never to tell.”
“And if things change between you and Caleb, that includes him, too.”
“There is no way things are going to change between us…unless maybe he bought me one of those,” she says indicating the riding crop as I slip i
t back in my lingerie drawer, wishing I still didn’t know what it was worth.
“That’s something to consider,” I say, winking to make it seem like a joke when, in fact, I am completely serious. Nicole just laughs, but I can almost see the wheels turning inside her head. Good.
When Lucy comes to drive Nicole home, the reason Cain speaks her name as if it is magic becomes clear to me when she surprises me with my daddy’s locket. I’m so relieved I am inclined to hug her, but to avoid any potential awkwardness, I thank her profusely instead.
With Nicole gone, everything is back to normal except for the fact that I am now officially living here. I can’t believe how my life has changed. A few weeks ago, I could never have imagined that I would be saying “I love you” to any man and certainly not a man like Cain, and now I am living with him, wearing diamonds and designer clothes, and about to remodel an amazing apartment any way I want. This is surely a dream.
With the place all to myself, I follow Cain’s advice, putting the tethers, blindfold, and cuffs he gave me in a drawer in my closet with the riding crop. As I gather these symbols together, my mind is thrust back to the dungeon. I head to the shower to be ready when the interior designer comes, consumed as I relive every perfect moment from the time Cain put the blindfold on himself last night.
“Lie on your back and wait,” I had bid him at the table…
September 23, Playing Domme in Cain’s Dungeon
“Yes, Domina,” Cain says reverently as he complies with my first command. I’ll never tire of hearing those words when he’s not saying them sarcastically or indulgently, and it’s hard to walk away from him as he lies there with his black leather pants pulled up but unbuttoned at the top to show a sparse, blonde pathway.
I might want that shaved, I think to myself as I go to the armoires and the hooks on the right wall, selecting cuffs, toys, and a couple of whips. Then music. He already has the sound system set to play trip-hop, which is the perfect backdrop for what we do in here, but I want to start things off with a particular song - the song playing at Envy the night he practically fucked me on the dance floor - Angel.
As the first, soft notes penetrate the silence, I begin to slowly trace the lines of Cain’s muscles with the tip of my riding crop. I cuff his wrists and ankles, attaching the hooks to the eyelets along the edges of the table, and as I do, I kiss the tops of his feet and suck his fingers into my mouth, twisting my tongue around them, his reactions giving me the confidence I need to reveal my game to him.
“Do you like that?” I ask as I work his pants down over his hips.
“Yes, Domina.”
“Would you like me to do that to your cock?” I ask.
“Oh, yes, Domina.”
“Show me,” I say, getting my taste on my finger before I shove it in his mouth. He moans as he complies with my order, but what he does with his tongue seems more like what he would do to me than what I would do to him. It strikes me as funny - such a stubborn, male thing to do, and I jerk my finger away.
“We’re going to play a game,” I whisper. “We’re going to pretend that we’re negotiating, like we did in the beginning, only this time, it will be for something we never quite carved in stone. It’s just a game, but I still want complete honestly. Okay?”
“Yes, Domina.”
“Good, because we’re going to be negotiating what would happen if I were to bring another woman into our games.” Cain’s breath catches, and his cock twitches. “I need to know exactly what you want.”
“I want anything you want, Domina.”
“I didn’t ask what you think I want to hear,” I growl at him, swatting his leg with the riding crop. He gasps, startled by it, pleasantly reminding me that he’s never been in a submissive position before. I ask again, but it seems Cain Ballantyne, who thinks of everything down to the finest detail, cannot answer this simple question. Amused, I release his cuffs from the clips and tell him to lose the pants before I guide him to his knees and use short tethers to crisscross his hands behind his back, binding them to the opposite sides of the table. Gathering up my gorgeous, yet cumbersome dress, I climb on the table facing him.
“Now, tell me what you want to happen,” I demand. He opens his mouth to speak, but he says nothing. “What’s the matter, Playboy? Cat got your tongue?”
“Alright, but just remember, Domina, you asked for it,” Cain finally says, that smug grin spreading across his face. “First, I want to see you kiss her.”
“Like this?” I ask, my lips barely touching his.
“Like this,” he breathes the words into me, pulling at his tethers to get closer as he assaults my mouth, and feeling his cock jerk against my belly, I want this dress gone. I unsnap the eye flaps on his blindfold, turn around, and reach behind me to place the ribbon that laces up the back of the gown between his teeth, and he pulls back, undoing the bow. He kisses and bites me, starting between my shoulder blades and working downward until he has pulled the ribbon entirely free with his teeth and tongue, and God, how I love the things his tongue can do!
I turn around to face him, peeling the sides of the dress down to release my breasts as I peer into his eyes, deep blue in the low light, and I ask him what comes next, giving him no real choice now that my tits are exposed before him.
“Come closer, Domina,” Cain beckons, and with the dress surrounding me from the waist down, I carefully inch forward on my knees.
“I want to see her do this,” he says, taking one nipple into his mouth, teasing it, biting it as waves of pleasure roll outward, the way he uses his teeth pure ecstasy to me.
“And what about her?” I ask. “What if I don’t want to do the same to her?”
…because I don’t.
“I could do it,” he offers.
“But what if I don’t want to see your mouth on another woman’s tits? It hardly seems fair to her.”
“It’s your dungeon, Domina. It doesn’t have to be fair.”
“Oh, I like that,” I purr, closing the flaps so I can get down and squirm out of this dress. I release his wrists from the tethers and remove his ankle cuffs before climbing back onto the table.
“So what else do you want?” I ask, and Cain leans toward me, finding my face with his, nuzzling against me until his mouth is right by my ear, still graceful even blind.
“I want to see her pretty face buried in your pussy,” he whispers, his words tearing through me like high voltage. It’s wrong, and I’m ashamed, but suddenly all I can think about is getting him to do that to me - do what those three little words I won’t say succinctly describe. I slip the ankle cuffs on myself and clip his wrists to my ankles, and though I don’t even know if I could come again like this so soon, I’m sure as hell going to try.
“Show me,” I say tentatively, and Cain grabs my feet in his hands, forcing me onto my back. He pushes until my knees bend and my legs are spread wide, leaving only his mouth to worship at my altar, and at the first delicate stroke, I feel myself as desperate to come as I was the first time tonight. He teases, his smooth shaven chin gliding over me until he does just what he said he wanted to see, burying his beautiful face in me, steadily mounting the pressure as his exquisite tongue moves faster and faster, guiding me to a swift, miraculous end.
“Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, my God!” I scream, and he burrows into me, his tongue pressed flat against me in a slow, circular motion. I ride out the aftershocks until I can’t take the slightest touch.
“God, you’re so fucking good,” I breathe, the words spilling out on their own as I collapse on the table, and though I know I’m supposed to be in charge here, I feel utterly incapacitated.
“Fuck me,” I order him, hoping he doesn’t notice my weakness as I fumble to disconnect our cuffs, but he notices. Cain doesn’t miss a thing.
“Oh, no, no, no,” he says. “That’s not how it works…Domina.” And his taunt strikes a chord, angering me, reviving me. I grab the ankle cuffs, ripping the velcro apart to get them off, and I stand on
my knees, facing him, reaching around to bring my hand down hard on his ass. When he flinches, I sting him again before I clip his wrist cuffs together behind his back, the ankle cuffs still dangling from them. With one more smack of my right, I grab his hair in my left, pulling his head roughly backward.
“Fuck. Me.” I growl, biting his neck, my mouth savage as I slowly let his flesh slip from between my teeth.
“That’s more like it,” he says as I turn to bend over, and even without the use of his hands, Cain’s cock finds me effortlessly, thrusting in suddenly and deeply as I push myself hard against him. His rhythm and his cock are perfect, and it takes only seconds to make me come, screaming his name. My head back thrown back, my hair whips against him like the tiny tendrils of a silken cat-o-nine-tails as I feel myself throbbing around his beautiful, merciless cock, trembling from the intensity of the orgasm. Now I want nothing more than to devote my full attention to making him come.
I slide off the table, releasing his cuffs from each other and ordering him to lie on his back, and I tether his wrists so his hands can’t reach down to feel the toy I’m about to use on him. In the Toy Box, I found a prosthetic sleeve meant to simulate a vagina, and though I can’t imagine why it was in there, it’s exactly what I need to finish this game. I’m going to give him something I know he would love if I had another woman here under my command.
Settling between his spread legs with the sleeve and a bottle of flavorless lube, I start slow, enjoying the feel of his cock in my mouth, my tongue swirling over the smooth, taut flesh. After all the teasing he’s taken tonight, just quickening my pace slightly brings him to the threshold…the first time. I slow down, teasing him with my fingernails until he’s calmed enough to begin my onslaught again, bringing him back to the brink. Not ready for my debut to be over, I do it a third time and a fourth, pushing his limits, torturing him like he has never been tortured, and each time I stop, instead of disappointment, his tone says “hell, yeah!”
When I’m finally ready to take him all the way, I smooth the lube over his cock and carefully slide him inside the tight, soft sleeve. He tenses immediately, unsure of what he’s feeling, but as I move it up and down his shaft, he relaxes. With my left hand working the sleeve and my wet, right thumb teasing him beneath, I begin taking his balls into my mouth, one at a time, then both, pushing him until I’m rewarded with near-constant auditory feedback. It’s a divine sound that grows with my intensity until he’s stridently chanting my name, his hips thrust forward into the sleeve as I hold my position, letting my right thumb slip a little lower now that he’s too far gone to be ashamed, and instantly, he explodes, roaring my name as his come shoots out of small hole in the tip of the sleeve.
