by LuAnn McLane
“Better?” Bella asked.
“Yeah, it’s gonna be all right,” Logan said, but he wasn’t really talking about the knot in his leg. “You can head on over to Sully’s now.”
She looked at him for a second, and his heart thudded in his chest. “No, I’ll wait for you.”
He grinned. “Good.”
“Not that I need you for protection or anything. I can take care of myself. You owe me dinner after all this waiting-on-you-hand-and-foot stuff.” She gave him one of her hair flips, but he wasn’t buying it. She busied herself slipping on her sandals.
“You need to get ya some cowboy boots instead of those silly-ass shoes,” he said with a shake of his head.
“Oh, would you just shut up about my shoes and put on some clothes? I’m hungry.”
“Are you seriously going to walk all the way to Sully’s in those things? They’ve got to hurt your feet.”
Bella looked down at her feet. The shoes were gorgeous but pinched her toes. She thought about it for a second. “I’ll be fine.”
Logan raised his eyebrows. “Okay, but don’t ask me to carry you home when your feet are killing you,” he warned, but his threat was empty. In fact, he hoped her cute little dogs would be barking so loud that she begged him to carry her.
And he would. Gladly.
19
All or Nothing
“Here,” Madison said, and shoved a bottle of Midol in Jessica’s hand.
“What’s this for?”
Madison raised her eyebrows. “You mean you’re not PMSing?”
“No!” Jessica answered, and leaned one hip against the counter. The diner was closed, but she couldn’t bring herself to head upstairs to her silent, lonely apartment.
“Hmm . . .” Madison tapped the side of her cheek. “I wonder what your problem could be. I wonder if it could be the same thing that’s been making Ty a total grump.”
Jessica stopped straightening up the already pristine counter. “He’s been grumpy?” she asked casually, but flicked Madison a glance.
“Mom, that’s an understatement. Jason said that Ty bit his head off yesterday, and then, of course, apologized. Ty’s not usually a grumpy sort.” Madison sighed and gave Jessica a pointed look.
“I’m sure it’s just pre–opening day nerves.”
“Just who are you trying to fool? Yourself? Because you’re not fooling me.”
Jessica remained silent since she didn’t have a reply that made any sense.
“Mom, why are you fighting this?” Madison persisted. “It’s making you miserable, and that’s just not your personality either. That’s got to tell you something. What in the world are you waiting for?”
“I’m waiting until I’m ready to take that step.”
“Waiting?” Madison sputtered. “That’s just stupid.”
“I have too much going on right now to have a serious relationship. The time has to be right, Madison.”
“You are so full of it.”
“Ma-di-son!”
“Oh no, I don’t deserve a Ma-di-son for that one. You deserve a Jess-i-ca! Quit being such a chickenshit.”
“Don’t talk to me that way.”
“Well, you’re pissing me off! Mom, seriously, this is stupid. There is no other word for it.”
“Don’t judge someone until you’ve walked in their shoes.”
“Okay, then. I will.” She bent over and slipped her sandals off. Hand me your shoes.”
“Um, that was a figure of speech.”
“No. I’m going to give you my cute sandals and I’m going to put on your sensible flats. Then I’m going to tell Jason that we can’t see each other because he’s too busy at the stadium, and I have to concentrate on the new play I’m working on and on preparing to teach fall classes. We’ll just have to wait until the time is right for us to be in a serious relationship.”
“Stop mocking me,” Jessica tried to say firmly, but her voice quavered.
“Mom, I would never do that. I’m making a point.” She inhaled a deep breath and blew it out. “Okay, look. At least get out of here,” she suggested in a gentle tone. “I’m meeting Jason over at Sully’s. Come on over with me.”
Jessica shook her head.
“What? Come on. Why the hell not?”
“I’m not in the mood.”
“Really? Or is it because you’re afraid you might see Ty? He sure hasn’t been in here, and I just bet he’s been eating over at Sully’s. I guess he’s being just as stupidly stubborn as you are.”
“No, he’s respecting my wishes and giving me some space.”
Madison placed her palms on the counter and leaned forward. “Wait. You told him to stay away from you?”
“Yes,” Jessica admitted.
“Mom, you do know that if you keep pushing him away, eventually it’s going to work.”
Jessica’s heart hammered at the thought.
“The man can only take so much rejection.”
“I’m not rejecting him!”
“Then what do you call it?”
“Being sure! This is a big step for me.”
“I agree.” Madison nodded firmly. “A big step backward. Mom, you had this whole fear thing conquered. What happened?”
“I don’t know,” she answered softly, and traced circles on the counter with her fingertip.
“It was the intensity of the feelings, wasn’t it?”
Jessica looked up in surprise.
Madison gave her a knowing nod. “Scary, I know. There is so much power behind the emotion of love.”
Jessica inhaled a deep breath. “Madison, I hate to ask this, but how did you gather up the courage to say yes to marrying Jason when more than half of all marriages fail?”
“Really, Mom?” Madison shook her head in disbelief. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Sweetie, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that question. I don’t mean to put indecision in your head.”
“You haven’t,” Madison assured her. She gave Jessica a level look. “Okay, let me ask you this. What made you sink your life savings into this diner, knowing full well the state of the economy and the fact that restaurants have such a high failure rate?”
“It was my dream.”
“Worth the risk?”
Jessica closed her eyes and nodded her agreement.
“I rest my case.”
Jessica opened her eyes and looked at her daughter. “I’ve got to go all in, don’t I?”
“Finally!” Madison raised her hands upward and shook them. “Praise the Lord! You finally get it. Wow. Is teaching going to be this difficult?”
Jessica gave her a wobbly smile. “For your sake, I hope not. But, then again, I’m a slow learner.”
“Oh, Mom!” Madison walked over and wrapped her arms around Jessica. “I love you so much. It hurts me to see you sad. Let the past go once and for all.”
“No.”
Madison pulled back and looked at her. “Come again?”
“Madison, I don’t need to let go of the past. It’s made me who I am today. I just need to stop fighting it. My past has taught me some valuable lessons.” She pressed her lips together and gathered her emotions. “I know what love is and what love isn’t.”
“And it certainly isn’t deserting your child in her time of need,” Madison said with an edge to her voice that Jessica rarely heard. “But . . .” Madison began, and then stopped.
“What aren’t you telling me?” They rarely spoke of her parents, and Jessica’s heart pounded with anticipation. When Madison hesitated, Jessica prompted, “Madison?”
Madison scooted up to a sitting position on the countertop. “One evening not long after we had moved back here, Aunt Myra and I were washing dishes, and she turned to me and suddenly shook her head. When she got teary-eyed, something she almost never does, I asked her what was wrong.” It was Madison’s turn to press her lips together.
Jessica scooted onto the counter with her and looped her a
rm around her daughter’s shoulder. “You can tell me anything. You know that, right?”
Madison sniffed and gave her a jerky nod. “Aunt Myra said that she almost called me . . . Molly. That I looked so much like her . . .” Madison trailed off and swallowed hard. “Do I look like her, Mom?”
“Yes,” Jessica answered softly. “You have my mother’s eyes, her hair. You are pretty much the spitting image.” She hesitated, “And her laugh, although I rarely heard it.”
“That has to be hard for you.”
“Sometimes. And then other times it was like it was all I had of my mother . . . the good in her anyway.”
Madison angled her head.
“What, sweetie?”
Madison looked down at the countertop for a long moment and then looked back up. “I asked Aunt Myra how she thought that her brother could have abandoned you and let her help raise me. I asked what kind of monster could do such a thing. And I wanted to know how she thought that Molly—I am sorry, but I can’t call her my grandmother—could leave raising her grandchild up to her sister-in-law?”
Jessica’s heart thudded and she pushed back to get a look at Madison. “What did Aunt Myra say?”
“She said that William Robinson was a bully, a tyrant.” Madison put a gentle hand on Jessica’s leg. “Mom, Aunt Myra said that Molly thought it was best for you to be away from him and that she was making the ultimate sacrifice by giving up her child and grandchild.”
Jessica felt a hot flash of anger.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I’ve upset you!” Madison put her hand over Jessica’s white-knuckled grip on the edge of the counter.
“No, don’t be upset. These are things you have every right to ask.”
“You don’t believe that, do you?”
Jessica looked at the sweet face of her daughter, the face that looked so much like her mother’s. “She loved to cook but wasn’t allowed,” Jessica finally said, and then shook her head. “He hated everything from her unruly hair to the name Molly, which he called common. It was as if he wanted to purge everything connected with his impoverished childhood from his life, including his only sister.”
Madison slapped the countertop so hard that saltshakers jumped. “Why didn’t she just come with you? She could have lived with us! Cooked here in the diner!” Madison’s eyes filled with tears. “Why?” she repeated brokenly.
“Fear,” Jessica whispered. “Fear can be paralyzing.”
“Keep you from doing what you really want to do,” Madison added, and gave her a level look. “Mom, don’t let that happen to you.”
“You’re right.” She inhaled deeply. “Oh, but it takes so much courage when your heart is at stake.”
“Well . . .” Madison raised her eyebrows. “Courage isn’t something you’re lacking now. Is it?”
“No.”
Madison waited in silence.
“Oh, boy, I just fell into some sort of trap, didn’t I?”
Madison widened her eyes in innocence, but Jessica wasn’t fooled for one second. “Whatever do you mean?”
“You have that something-up-your-sleeve look in those gorgeous eyes of yours. What do you have in your hand?”
“Just my cell phone.”
“Who have you been texting?”
“Jason.”
“And?”
“Bella, to see if she is going to Sully’s, and she’s going with Logan.”
“Oh . . . how is that whole arrangement holding up?”
Madison rolled her eyes. “It’s complicated.”
“Is that what is says on her Facebook profile?”
Madison chuckled. “Humor . . . must mean you are in a better mood?”
Jessica narrowed her eyes. “Okay, enough small talk. What have you just cooked up? And, no, that wasn’t diner humor.”
“Well . . .” Madison slid from the counter and landed on the ground as if ready for flight. I might have asked Ty if he was going to Sully’s to grab a late bite.”
“Is he?”
“No. Mr. Grumpy said he was tired and staying in, even though I happen to know he has the day off from coaching tomorrow.”
“There’s more, isn’t there?”
“Well, and I might have said that I would bring him some leftovers from here on my way over to Bella’s.”
“And what does this have to do with me?” Jessica asked, but then shook her head and backed away. “Oh no! I am not taking food over to Ty’s!”
“He sounded so hungry. And I’m heading straight to Sully’s. It would be out of my way, and I did promise. Could you do this little thing for me?” She put her thumb and index finger an inch apart.
“No!” Madison gave her the pout that always worked. “Oh, come on. Are you really bringing out the pout?”
“Works on Jason.”
“Bless his heart.”
“Mom, this is your chance. Be brave! Thought you were all in—or are you all talk?”
“I’m all talk.”
“Well, start walking the talk!”
Jessica closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath. “I can’t throw myself at him again with food in my hands. Especially after I asked the man for space.”
“Ty gave you your space. Now it’s time to close the gap. Do you seriously think he won’t be thrilled to see you?”
“Maybe he’s moved on.” Oh . . . That thought sent a shiver down her spine.
“He is pining for you.”
“Pining? Really?”
“Panting?”
“Madison!”
“Mom, march your tushie into the kitchen and make the man some food. You know all of his favorites by now.” She pointed toward the double doors.
“You’re pretty darned good at giving orders.”
Madison smiled. “I know. It’s a gift.” She looked down at her phone and then sent a message at superfast speed.
“Jason?”
“Nope. Ty, asking where his care package was.” She shooed her hands toward the kitchen. “Go take care of his package. You know you want to,” she said in a singsong voice. And when Jessica opened her mouth, Madison said, “I know—Ma-di-son!”
Jessica looked at the kitchen doors and felt a little surge of excitement.
“I’m leaving. I am trusting you not to wuss out.”
“I’m on it,” Jessica promised.
“Good! Okay, I’m going to bounce. Jason is headed over to Sully’s,” she said, but then closed the distance between them and gave Jessica a big hug. “I love you, Mom.” After a quick peck on the cheek, she hurried out the door.
“Oh, boy,” Jessica said under her breath, and then headed into the kitchen and flicked on the light. She blinked in the bright glare for a moment and smiled. She was admittedly nervous at Madison’s latest scheme, but her blood was pumping and the zing of excitement was so much better than the dull ache that had plagued her since she stopped seeing Ty. It had been less than two weeks, but it seemed like a lifetime. Of course, by seeing Ty, she meant in the flesh. The man was never far from her thoughts. And the dreams . . . ? Oh, dear Lord.
Jessica hummed as she put together a very nice variety of all of Ty’s favorites. She added a slice of apple pie that had been baked fresh that morning. She had set it aside for her breakfast, and now she just might be having apple pie in bed . . .
20
Food for Thought
When Ty’s stomach rumbled in angry protest, he patted his abdomen. “Hey, buddy. I know you miss Wine and Diner,” he mumbled as he started clicking through the more than seventy channels yet again. Nothing captured his interest, not even sports or the Food Network. Pausing on South Park couldn’t squeeze a laugh out of him. Then again, lately all he had been doing was going through the motions. Not good, when opening day was just a few days away. Noah had finally suggested a day off for everyone, and Ty had reluctantly agreed. He needed to get his damned head screwed on straight! These kids were depending upon him, and although he tried to stay focused, constant thoughts of Jes
sica kept interrupting his concentration.
And he did miss her food, but he just couldn’t bring himself to go in Wine and Diner, not even for takeout. Thinking about Jessica was bad enough, but seeing her would just about do him in. So many times in the past few days he had picked up his cell phone and scrolled down to her number just to hear her voice, but always aborted the call. Ty sighed. He had promised to give Jessica her space and he wasn’t about to go back on his word. He wanted her to come to him. . . .
But, damn, it was killing him.
Ty didn’t know it was possible to miss a woman this much. It was like a dull, throbbing ache that only Jessica’s touch could cure. Sleep couldn’t even bring relief, since his slumber was filled with sensual dreams about making love to her. He couldn’t eat, he couldn’t sleep, and it was taking its toll on him big-time. He was starting to snap at people for no real reason, and he hated doing that.
Noah had tried to get him to head over to Sully’s to grab a bite and play some pool, but Olivia was joining him and Jason was meeting Madison. Ty didn’t think he could stand being there without Jessica at his side, and so he had begged off. He should have gone just to keep an eye on his players, who were sure to show up there in droves. Bella had tried her best to get him over there, and although blowing off steam would have been a good thing, he just didn’t feel up to socializing. And so here he sat in sweatpants for yet another night on his couch, surfing through channels with a frown on his face.
It sucked.
Ty inhaled deeply and scratched his chest. Oh, well. At least Madison was bringing him some food, although he wasn’t quite sure he could eat Jessica’s cooking and not go crazy with the need to see her. He thought about calling Madison and telling her not to bother when the doorbell chimed. “Too late,” he mumbled, and padded on bare feet over to retrieve his sad little care package.
Ty swung open the door and stood there dumbfounded. “You’re not Madison,” he said, and then felt like a complete dork.
“Well, she did have this plan about switching identities, but, yeah, I’m not Madison.”
“So what brings you here?” he tried to ask casually, even though his heart was beating like a bass drum.
