* * *
As spring marched forward, things around their apartment seemed smoother. Brad didn’t know why—maybe Ethan was trying harder or he and Val had learned to get along better. He had no idea, but it was a welcome relief.
Jo called again, apologizing to Brad for what happened the last time, and told him she was dying to see him. He tried to be as gentle as possible but told her he thought her boyfriend would flat-out kill him if he caught him with Jo again. It was a risk he wasn’t willing to take.
One thing Jo had taught him, though, was to not go so long without a woman in his life. So, now that he was of legal drinking age (and none of his fellow band members were yet), he made it a point to go out one night a week and have a beer. By himself. And half the time he got lucky. There were no strings, nothing permanent, but he discovered that there were a lot of girls out there feeling just as lonely as he was, and even a quick connection was better than languishing. He had to get his head on straight, and one way was to stop denying his sexual urges. Sure, he could have had groupies constantly. They weren’t a huge band, but they already had their fair share of girls who loved the idea of rock stars. Still, he didn’t want to go there. Ethan, Nick, and Zane had no issues with it, but Brad hesitated. He felt like it was shitting where he ate.
Jet called Brad one day and told him he’d read a review of a recent Fully Automatic concert. Brad looked it up on the internet but found that the review was only available in the hard copy. He asked if anyone wanted to go with him to check it out, and Val and Zane took him up on the offer. So they got in the van and drove to a nearby Chipotle. The restaurant wasn’t open yet, so they sat in the van for a while talking, waiting for the doors to open.
The paper was free. They all got drinks and then huddled around a table, each of them with a copy, leafing through the paper. Val examined each page, afraid she’d miss it, but Zane was zipping through and said, “Found it. Page forty-four.” Brad and Val flipped through their papers until they found that page.
Brad noticed the picture first. It was a typical newspaper photo, black and white and pixely. But it was cool—it was the first time his band was mentioned in the press. He stared at it for a while, taking it in. He’d seen a couple of fan-recorded videos on YouTube, but they hadn’t prepared him for this.
He slowly took it in, paragraph by paragraph. At first, he couldn’t tell if the reviewer liked the band, because he was using words that could be either positive or negative, depending on the context. Descriptions like gritty and unpolished could be good or bad. But before he could find that context, Val said, “Oh, God…I can’t read anymore.” Well, that made him think the review wasn’t good.
Zane started reading out loud, so Brad searched the text to try to find where he was reading from. “At first, Quinn seemed to be holding back. By mid-show, however, her vocals were strong. Her style alternates between singing and screaming, and she can hold her own doing either. By the third song, Quinn had the audience eating out of her hand, whipping them into a headbanging frenzy.”
He continued and Brad gave up trying to find where he was in the paper. He talked about how talented Nick was—his performance was grueling, almost painful to watch, but he was precise, and he said a tiny blip about Zane too. He talked about Ethan, stating the guy was talented as hell but didn’t seem to be present. Well, that was no surprise to the band members. He mentioned some of their songs too, and Brad started to think maybe this guy was becoming a fan. He felt relief.
Zane kept reading. “However, the best part of the show was guitarist Brad Payne. Payne showed precision beyond his years, whether he was involved in brutal shredding or impressing the audience with masterful melodies. His energy seemed to be one of the driving forces of the band too.” Zane kept reading and, while Brad was grateful that the guy had liked him, he was also a little embarrassed that the rest of the band hadn’t been on the receiving end of more praise. And he didn’t quite believe it, either. He knew they had a long way to go to be perfect.
Zane looked at him, nodding and smiling. Brad shook his head.
Val said, “Brad, you should be proud. Everything he said about you is true.”
He looked down. “Not everyone in the band is going to be as enthusiastic as you, Val.” Ethan would likely be pissed. He’d hardly gotten a mention, and it hadn’t exactly been a compliment.
“Yeah, well, he needs to get the fuck over it. It didn’t say anything bad about him, and you deserve every word the article said.” Val smiled and rested her hand on his. “I’m proud of you and glad to be your friend.” He smiled. What could he say that wouldn’t sound asinine? She turned her attention to Zane and he was relieved. “And you too, Zane.”
“Yeah, but the article didn’t gush about me like it did Mr. Guitar Man. I know. I get it. Guy who plays bass is the low man on the metal totem pole.” He started laughing. “At least it doesn’t affect how much pussy I get.”
Val said, “Yeah. God forbid.”
Brad cleared his throat. More than anything else, he didn’t want the praise getting to anyone’s head, especially his own. Until they were signed, a review didn’t mean shit. It might bring a bigger audience, though, so he wasn’t going to sneeze at it. “Let’s get the fuck out of here and let the guys know. This is just one of many things that will help us get recognized. No time to rest on our laurels, ladies.”
And he meant it. Until success was in their hands, there was no time to rest.
Chapter Thirty-nine
A COUPLE OF days after the review, Jet called Brad again with a proposition. “Hey, dude, we’ve set up a couple of shows out of state, and we were thinking about going balls out—invite a couple of other bands, make a huge show. You know, we could contact lots of venues close together but get exposure to people who’ve never seen us before.”
“When are you thinking?”
“We already have a couple shows booked for late spring, so we’re gonna see what we can come up with. But before we start booking shows, we want two solid bands with us. I’m pretty sure Spanky’s Kids is on board. You play with them before?”
“No, but I’ve heard they kick ass.”
“That they do. And they have a huge following—probably more people than you and me combined. What’s your schedule look like?”
They discussed particulars, and Brad was stoked. He loved Denver crowds, but expanding their audience could only help them.
When he told the band, they too thought it was a great idea. Of course, the questions started. He tried to remind them of the times—not even a year earlier—when they would do weekend shows on the road. This would be the same, only it would be longer. The best part was that Brad wouldn’t have to book any of the shows.
He wound up pitching in, though, and all three of the bands on board did a little asking around. Brad wound up securing one venue on his own. When all was said and done, they had nine new venues spread out over fourteen days. As soon as Jet had told him about it, Brad asked his boss if he could have the time off. The guy had been really accommodating, and all Brad could figure was it was because he’d never missed a day of work. He’d asked for time off, but he’d never called in. Not once. Yeah, he hadn’t even been there a year, but turnover for the place was pretty high and, of the employees who stayed a month or two, attendance wasn’t always the best either. When Brad thought about it, he was surprised too. In just eight months, he was the senior employee, aside from his boss.
When the dates were solidified, Brad also told Val to ask for the time off. Her place of employment wasn’t quite so understanding, though, and told her that her job might not be waiting for her upon her return. Val decided that, even though she found it distressing, she was going to do the tour anyway. Her future wasn’t in sandwiches. It was in music. She could get another sandwich-making job when she got back if she had to. Brad even offered to bring her back during the part of the tour where they had a couple of days off in the middle. Fortunately, she saw the foolishness of it a
nd told him she’d get another job if her boss decided not to take her back.
In preparation, they worked on a couple of new songs and switched up their set list. They were going to debut the new songs on the road. They’d make them perfect and then share them with their old fans back home.
And, just in time for their road trip, Ethan and Val began bickering again. Oh, they were quiet and contained about it at first, but it was there just the same. If they got vocal or out of hand, Brad was going to have to say something. Nick and Zane never complained about it, but he could see on their faces that they hated it as much as he did. It was stressful. When he’d been making their accommodation arrangements, he told them they’d be sharing a room and the three guys the other—a small shift in what they used to do, but that would give the three other guys a break. Still two rooms among them, but it would feel a little roomier.
All three bands met at Village Inn a few days before the tour started to iron out the last few final details, and Ethan made a huge display. He was obviously on something, and he was all over Val. She let him, but his friend was acting possessive and alpha for no good reason. It was ridiculous and embarrassing. All Brad could figure was it was because Ethan was trying to send a signal to all the guys on tour that Val was his. Brad could halfway understand it. Val was beautiful and hot, and she was the only woman in their baker’s dozen. Ethan felt the need to let the other men know she was his and they’d better not lay a finger on her.
Still…he could have been more subtle about it. Instead, when they continued talking out in the parking lot, Ethan pushed Val up against the van and let her have it full on. Jesus. It was awkward and uncomfortable. If he started feeling her up or some shit, Brad was going to have to step in. Ethan stopped just short of it. And instead of saying anything, Brad took a deep breath and continued talking to the other people in their group, trying to ignore Ethan’s territorial display.
Once they got on the road, though, he grew excited. New audiences, more fans, new sights. Brad planned to do all the driving for his band. They would only be driving during the day and, other than the first day, it didn’t seem like they’d be on the road more than six hours at a time, so he knew he could do it. When it came to the van, he was a bit of a control freak. Hell, he was a control freak about everything, because he felt like he could ultimately only trust himself. It had paid off thus far. He didn’t think it bothered any of his bandmates for the most part—sure, some of them bitched once in a while (like when he organized duties at their apartment), but they got over it. He decided if he got super tired, he’d ask Val if she wanted to drive, but she was the only one he’d trust to do it.
It was just two days into the tour, and Brad sensed a weird shift in the dynamics of the group. He wasn’t sure exactly what was going on, but he knew something huge was happening between Ethan and Val. Neither of them said a word, but by day three, they weren’t talking to or looking at each other—and yet Val looked like she was having a hard time not smiling.
Maybe that meant that she’d finally told Ethan goodbye for good. But the last time she’d done it, she’d been miserable until they’d gotten back together. Something serious and heavy was going on, but he didn’t want to get in the middle of it, so he wasn’t going to ask. As long as the band was functioning okay, he’d keep his nose out of everyone else’s business. And, if he knew Ethan and Val as well as he thought he did, he’d find out soon enough.
Turned out he was right. Ethan was angrier than usual but didn’t say a word. He knew it was because, when it came to Val, the guy didn’t trust Brad. Maybe he’d had every reason not to a year earlier, but in the present, he had nothing to worry about. Brad had made a promise, and he wasn’t about to break it.
He started putting two and two together, though. First, Ethan started sleeping in the room with the other three guys, confirming the split. But then Brad noticed that Val and Jet were hanging together—a lot. And when Jet draped his arm over Val’s shoulder after one of the shows and whispered in her ear, Brad thought he’d figured it out.
It was a little disheartening. Brad was glad Val had managed to escape the toxic hold Ethan had over her, but she’d jumped right into another relationship. He knew Jet might just be rebound guy, but it bothered him. Still…he and Jet had always gotten along. Jet was a good guy. A bit of a party animal, but he respected the hell out of the guy, and if Val kept smiling like she was, he guessed he’d find a way to live with it.
Val confirmed his suspicions not long after he’d figured it out. One night, they were loading up their equipment after another great but exhausting show, and she pulled him aside when they’d finished. Whatever it was, it was making her nervous, so he tried to look calm. “We’re spending money on an extra room, but I’m not using it. Well…I’m using it to put on makeup and get dressed, but that’s it.”
He didn’t want to jump to conclusions, even though he was pretty sure he knew what she was saying. “Why? What’s wrong with it?”
She blinked and said, “Nothing. I’ve just…been spending the night in someone else’s room. And I figured we were wasting money. You can either just not get it, or one of you guys can share it with me.”
Even though he’d known, the admission felt like a wrecking ball to the chest. He forced air into his lungs and hoped his expression was as neutral as he was aiming for. He tried to sound casual and upbeat. The truth was the rooms were already reserved, so he figured they were stuck with them. “That makes it mine now, and I’m kinda glad. It was hard enough sharing a room with two other guys, and now we’re back to four in a room…well, mostly.” Since she’d broached the subject, he had to know for certain. “So…you and Jet…pretty serious?”
She blinked again and then shrugged. “For now, I guess.”
He nodded. “Come here.” He put his arms around her. He needed to hide his face from her. They were close friends, but he loved her. He fucking loved her, and it was hitting him fast and hard. He needed a few seconds to pull his shit together. “You know I’m always here for you, right?”
“Yeah. Same here.” He had to let her go or she’d figure out things weren’t right with him. So he did and then she asked, “It’s okay if I leave my stuff in your room, right? And if I dress and all that stuff, but the bed’s yours?”
So…she was sleeping with Jet but leaving her shit in another room? That didn’t make sense. So he wouldn’t be able to just ignore it. He’d be reminded of it constantly. But what the hell else could he say? So he said the only thing he could. “Yeah, we’ll make it work.”
All their conversation had done, though, was open a wound he thought had healed. No, it had just scabbed over, and Val had ripped it back open. It was raw and painful again, and Brad felt like breathing was an effort. He had to do something to get her off his mind. He wasn’t going to survive if he couldn’t find a way to let her go for good.
* * *
A few nights later, several band members were partying together again, and a few fans had joined them. A gorgeous brunette was flirting with him, telling him how much she loved the band, the show, and especially Brad himself. She kept touching him and leaning in to whisper in his ear, and he decided maybe she could get his mind off Valerie.
He barely saw Val anymore. He saw her during shows and while they drove from one venue to the next, but her free time she was spending with Jet. He couldn’t blame her, he supposed. She was infatuated with the guy. He made her feel loved and wanted, and he suspected that he gave Val everything in him, unlike Ethan. Even when Ethan was faithful with Val, he kept a part of himself closed off. Brad understood why, but that didn’t make it easy for Val to accept.
Yeah…the girl named Brittany touching his arm. She would be a one-night thing, but it would be a good first step. Awesome sex managed to alter the course of his thoughts enough that he knew it would at least make the whole I love Val revelation a little less fresh. So when she asked, “How many girls ask you for a private concert?” he took that as his ope
ning.
“I think you’re the first.”
She bit her bottom lip and then smiled. “Well…?”
He shrugged. “Come on.” He crushed the empty beer can and tossed it in the trash on his way out. He was glad no one commented on the fact that he was leaving with a girl, but he wasn’t going to act all cute about it. He put his arm around her shoulders. She wanted to feel special for the night with him; he would give that to her.
He led her out to the van and unlocked the trailer, pulling out his guitar case. She could only see what the parking lot lights illuminated inside, but she could tell it was full. “Holy crap. You guys have a lot of stuff.”
“I guess people don’t realize what all goes into making music. It’s more than just a guitar.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
They walked up to his room, the one that was only his…and the place where Val stored her luggage. He’d felt a little guilty at first for having an entire room to himself, but he justified it in his mind. He was, for all intents and purposes, not just their guitar player; he was also their manager. He deserved to be spoiled a little once in a while. And, as he led this beautiful girl into that room that was only his, he was glad he’d decided to be selfish. Nick—hell, even Zane and Ethan—might not care if they found a girl who didn’t mind fucking in front of other people, but Brad wanted a little more privacy…and he wanted to be with a girl who didn’t feel the need to be an exhibitionist.
When they got to his room, Brad invited her to sit on one of the beds. On the other, he laid his guitar case down, opened the snaps, and pulled out his newest baby. He’d bought it for himself for his birthday—a beautiful work of art, tight and cherry-colored, and she had the loveliest tones. He’d fallen in the love with her the first time he played her, and she made playing onstage a treat.
Bullet Series Box Set Books 1-8 Page 120
