“That’s okay! What did you think?”
“You were great, Katherine. I thought you sounded amazing! And Project: Balance and the competition came off sounding so incredible.”
“Oh good! I’m so glad you thought so!” Katherine says, clapping her hands together.
“You want to scream?” I ask.
“I guess it depends what kind of scream. What’s up?”
“Since the competition went live last night, the registration packet has been downloaded over a hundred times!”
“That’s amazing!” Katherine says.
“I know! I really think we’re onto something here.”
“I think you’re right,” she says in a sing-song voice.
“Katherine,” Aimee, her assistant calls from across the loft.
“Yes?”
“Brooke’s on the phone for you. She wants to tell you, and I quote, how fabuloso you were on Today.”
“Tell her I’ll be with her in a second,” Katherine says, laughing. “So, dinner tonight at seven. Are we still on?”
“Hell, yeah. It’s about time we had a proper celebration dinner for this organization. And now we have some things to celebrate: a terrific coming-out party on Today and over a hundred downloads!”
“Okay, we’ll plan on leaving here at 6:50 to walk to Carlo’s. I’m so excited to finally try that place.”
Six months ago when Katherine offered me this job, I spent that night going over the pros and cons with Nick. I realized that this was an amazing opportunity and I decided it would be crazy to pass it up. Part of me wanted to wait to see if I got a job offer from Ash, but I was certain I wanted to work with Katherine, and if Ash did make me an offer it wouldn’t have reflected well on me to then turn it down. Plus, I didn’t want to burn any bridges at Green Goddess in case Project: Balance didn’t work out. That next morning, Friday, when I got to the office, I immediately told Ash that I was withdrawing my name from consideration. I still don’t know if he was planning to make me an offer. According to Sera, she doesn’t either.
I met Katherine for lunch that day, assertively negotiated a generous salary for myself, with full benefits, and officially accepted her offer. I had one more week at Green Goddess, then I took a week off to, well, do all the things I never get to do (organize my apartment, sleep in, binge watch Orange Is the New Black), and started working with Katherine after that.
It’s been better than I could have expected. The work we’re doing is stimulating and important, Katherine and I work incredibly well together, I feel so proud of what we’re trying to accomplish, and I’m excited about all that’s in store for us. Katherine has stuck to her word about working slowly and steadily, and her life has been so much better, too.
Soon after Katherine and I started Project: Balance, she asked me to meet her for breakfast before work one morning. Once we had ordered, she told me, quite matter-of-factly, that Theo had admitted to cheating on her. That he had cried for hours to her the night before and begged her to forgive him, that it had been a one-time thing, that he regretted it entirely, and that he was devastated that he might have put his marriage in jeopardy. And because, as he said, he wanted to put everything out there, he told her that I had witnessed it. Katherine completely understood why I hadn’t said anything to her; in fact, she thanked me for letting Theo tell her when he was ready. She said that he had made an appointment for them to go to therapy later that afternoon. And she said that she was unsure whether she should leave him or not (Once a cheater, always a cheater), but that she was willing to go to therapy and see if they could save their marriage. And they did. It was rocky at times, and, at one point, Katherine was going to leave him, but somehow they made it through. Katherine says that even though she can’t forget what Theo did, in many ways their marriage is even better because of it. I still have a hard time forgiving Theo for what he did, but I’ve decided that if Katherine is willing to move forward, I should, too.
At 6:50, Katherine, Aimee, and I head out of the loft, which is located equidistant from my and Katherine’s apartments, to walk to Carlo’s. We have been looking forward to this night all week. We’ve accomplished so much in the past six months and the announcement on Today was a culmination of those efforts. We are ready to celebrate.
We walk into the restaurant and Katherine gives her name to the hostess, who leads us through the main area toward the backroom.
“You booked the backroom?” I ask Katherine.
“I wanted us to have some privacy.”
“Big room for just the three of us.”
“I invited some others to help us celebrate,” Katherine says as we enter the room.
The room is filled with people, and I’m completely stunned because it’s my entire family: my mom; Matty, Shannon, and the boys; Tommy, Kelly, and Ella; Sam, Allie, and their new baby Finn; Theo; Ava. And Nick.
“Hey, you!” I say giving him a kiss, so happy to see him. “I’m so confused, what are you all doing here?”
Nick doesn’t say a word. He looks at me for a second and then before I even know what’s happening, he’s down on his knee.
I see Nick take a deep breath.
“Lucy,” he says.
I start to laugh and cry at the same time. JJ and Parker get up from where they’d been sitting and come over to where Nick and I are. They stand right next to me to see what’s going on. Everyone laughs.
“Lucy,” Nick continues, smiling. “I’m gonna try this again.”
More laughter in the room. My mother starts to cry, and Matt goes over to where she is and puts his arm around her. I stare down at Nick, at his beautiful face; I’m smiling so wide and the tears are flowing. A sun shower.
“Why are you crying, Aunt Lucy?” Parker asks in a concerned voice.
“Because I’m so happy,” I say.
“And why is Uncle Nick on the floor?”
We all laugh again. “Because I have a very important question to ask Aunt Lucy, buddy,” Nick says to Parker.
“Okay. What are you waiting for?” Parker asks, and Nick takes that as his cue to go on. I guess this is what happens when you get engaged in front of your entire family. Nick grabs my hands in his.
“Lucy, the past eight years have been the happiest in my life because I’ve spent them by the side of the most beautiful, intelligent, funny, and intriguing woman I’ve ever met. You are everything to me. And everything we’ve been through together has shown me that you are the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Lucy Olivia Cooper, will you marry me?”
“Say yes, Aunt Lucy,” JJ says jumping up and down.
“YES!” I say, laughing and crying and now kissing Nick as he stands up and grabs me in his arms.
Everyone in the room cheers and applauds. I see my mom crying into Matt’s shoulder. As everyone quiets down, Nick pulls a small velvet box out of his pocket and opens it. I gasp. The ring is so beautiful. As he extracts it from its silver velvet nest, I consider saying something, but I wait and let him place the stunning diamond on my waiting and very happy finger.
“Congratulations, you two!” Matty yells out.
A chorus of “Congratulations!” follows.
At that moment, waiters come into the room and start handing out glasses of champagne. John Legend’s “All of Me” starts playing. It’s perfect.
Shannon is standing closest to us, so she comes over and gives me a big kiss and hug, “Congratulations, Lucy,” she whispers in my ear. “This is going to be better than you could have ever imagined. You’ve made the right decision. Nick is a wonderful man, and I’m so happy for you.”
I hug her tightly, and then she pulls away and holds up my left hand so she can see my ring. All the women circle around me, giving me kisses, wishing me congratulations, and looking at my ring. Ava gives me a high five.
My brothers are all around Nick, slapping his back, giving him hugs, making various and sundry remarks that he better not ever break their little sister’s heart.
> Then the circles switch and the ladies go over to Nick, while the men surround me.
“Congratulations, little Lucy,” Tommy says. “We love Nick and we’re all very happy for you.”
“Thanks, Tommy,” I say.
“Lucy!” Sam says. “Nice work, little sister. Congratulations!”
“Thanks, Sam,” I say.
“Way to go, slugger. You deserve all the happiness in the world.”
“Thanks, Theo.”
Then it’s Matt’s turn. He pulls me to a corner of the room.
“Lucy,” he says and he can’t control his tears. “I love you so much, and I’m so happy for you.”
“Thanks, Matty,” I say, and he’s got me crying even harder than I was before.
“You really are making the right decision, you know.”
“I know,” I say softly.
We hear a big cheer in the dining room so we turn around and see that the waiters have brought out large platters of food. There’s a long rectangular table set for sixteen with place cards. Nick and I sit next to each other at the head on one end of the table with Matt to Nick’s left and Ava to my right. My mom is at the other head, Theo to her left and Katherine to her right.
As everyone gets settled, I turn to Nick. He takes my left hand in his right and looks into my eyes.
“That was fun,” Nick says. “Way more fun than the last time I proposed to a girl.”
“Oh, yeah?” I ask. “What happened then?”
“She didn’t say yes.”
“Bitch!”
“Well, no not exactly. She had some pretty valid reasons. Well, in her eyes they were pretty valid, but she’s come around.”
I look up at Nick and we kiss.
“Nick, there’s something I want to say to you, too. I almost said it when you were about to put the ring on my finger, but I decided I wanted to say it to you privately.”
“By the way,” he says. “Sorry to interrupt. But are you bummed I did it in front of everyone? I wasn’t sure if I should.”
“I loved it! It actually makes the whole thing fun and festive, like a little engagement party. You did good,” I say. “And this time, my hair is combed.”
“Did you like my little lie this afternoon when I said I’d see you after your dinner? I totally threw you off, huh?” he says, proud of his sneakiness.
“You did. I was not expecting this at all.”
“Sorry I interrupted you. What did you want to say?”
I hold both of Nick’s hands and look into his eyes. “These past six months have felt like a lifetime for me in terms of things that have happened and realizations I’ve made about how I want to live my life. Things that will affect me, affect us, for years to come. I’m so ready for all that we’re about to embark on together. I couldn’t be happier or more excited or more certain of anything I’ve ever done in my entire life.”
“Then I’m so glad we waited a bit to get engaged.”
“Yeah. I wasn’t sure that was such a good idea when you had suggested that we put off getting engaged until we were both more settled in our careers. But you were right.”
“Yeah. Things were so hectic and I felt like both of our lives were going through such a transition.”
“And now that we’ve both gotten through those transitions, incredibly successfully I should add, I’m so happy to know that we are in this together.”
“For the long run, Lucy Cooper.”
“For the long run, Nicholas Heston.”
Dinner is wonderful. The food is delicious. Carlo himself comes out of the kitchen to congratulate Nick and me. And there are lots of small toasts throughout dinner, including this one from Katherine: “I want to make a toast to congratulate Nick and Lucy. I couldn’t be happier for them and I’m so honored to be a part of this special occasion. Thank you all for entrusting Lucy in my care these past years. We went though a bit of a rough patch, but we’ve come out on the other end better than either of us could have ever imagined. Together we are building something magnificent, and I want you all to know how spectacular Lucy is at her job. She comes into our office every morning with an enthusiastic smile on her face and has the most incredible work ethic I have ever seen in my career. Nick and Lucy, I wish you both true love and pure happiness. Congratulations!”
And this one from Ava: “I also want to take this opportunity to congratulate Nick and Lucy. And I am so happy that you two are finally engaged. Not that I minded dealing with the drama it took to get the two of you here, but I’m happy you both finally realized that you are exceptionally perfect for one another. Lucy and I love quotes, and I wanted to find a perfect quote to share with you all tonight. That proved to be an impossible task. There are so many wonderful quotes on love, on destiny, on being true to who you are. How to choose just one? Nothing seemed perfect enough. Finally, though, I found this quote. It’s not exactly a summation of all the emotions that surround an engagement and new beginnings, but it is the perfect summation of Lucy. It’s by Mandy Hale: Just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, weird, beautiful, magical person that you are. Congratulations, Nick and Lucy. I love you both.”
And finally, this one from me: “I don’t have the words to express how happy I am right now. Tonight was a complete surprise, but it was the best surprise I’ve ever gotten in my life. There is so much I could say about how I’ve gotten to this place in my life, this amazing place. But that would go on forever, and you’re all probably tired of hearing me talk about how great it is that I’ve found balance and how I’ve learned so much over the last six months, and blah, blah, blah. So I’ll spare you the reflection and just say that I am so excited to embark on this next stage of my life. Building this organization with Katherine. And building this life, this new family, with Nick. Because right now my future is bright, and I’m looking forward to enjoying this next adventure in my life. With authenticity. With love. With balance.”
Acknowledgments
As a working mother, I am extremely interested in and curious about how women I admire manage the tragically glorified “doing it all” craze. So in January 2014, I started a series of interviews on my website called The Balance Project. Each week I post candid interviews that feature inspiring and accomplished women talking about balance. I’ve interviewed authors and entrepreneurs, bloggers and nonprofit executives, fashion designers and creative geniuses: brilliant women, all of them. I’ve even featured the male perspective.
Through The Balance Project interviews I learned that there is not a woman out there who is “doing it all” when “all” is defined by consistently giving full attention to her career, her family, and most importantly, herself. That is truly unrealistic and unsustainable. Everyone makes sacrifices somewhere. That realization made me feel a lot better. It took some of the pressure off as I struggled to find my own balance.
My takeaway has been that when we define “it all” realistically, then yes, we most certainly can have it. Setting manageable expectations ensures success. Shonda Rhimes said it perfectly, “Anyone who tells you they are doing it all perfectly is a liar.”
When I was thinking about what I wanted my second novel to be about, I decided I wanted to focus on an issue that was important to me. My award-winning, debut novel On Grace focused on being authentic when presented with a new life chapter, feelings I had faced when I turned forty. I wanted my second novel to have personal meaning as well. So The Balance Project became the inspiration for The Balance Project: A Novel.
There are so many people who have been supportive of my work and who have helped me with The Balance Project. . . .
Thank you Crystal Patriarche and the whole team at BookSparksPR and SparkPress. Crystal, you believed in me and I am so grateful for that. I am impressed by what you have accomplished as a pioneer in the changing world of publishing, and I’m so happy to be along for the ride. Thank you for helping me achieve my dream of being a published author. And thank you, Sara Chambers, for the ex
pert work promoting this book; I’ve really enjoyed working with you.
Beth Kendrick, you may have given me stomachaches, but you also ensured that I created a better book. Thank you for being such a thoughtful, insightful, constructive, and encouraging editor.
David Orman, Dad, sorry I made you work during your visit! Thank you for your comments and edits which were wonderful and very much appreciated.
Thank you Wayne Parrish for your excellent and thorough copyediting skills and for your heart-warming enthusiasm for the project and its theme (sorry about Nick!).
Thank you Julie Metz for, once again, coming up with a perfect and stunning cover. I fell in love when I saw it.
Thank you Jennifer Unter for your guidance and honesty over the years.
Thank you to all of the interviewees of The Balance Project: Jessica Mindich, Veronica Beard, Emily Liebert, Lyss Stern, Lauren Slayton, Elizabeth Moyer, Annabel Monaghan, Holly Gordon, Jill Salzman, Jennifer Levinson, Jenny Hutt, Angela Santomero, Carola Donato, Tiffany Washington, Emily Giffin, Alana Sanko, Cara Lemieux, Liz Fenton, Lisa Steinke, Nikki Mark, Colleen Oakes, Jill Bryan, Cindy Callaghan, Stephanie Hirsch, Whitney Dineen, Jo-Laine Duke-Collins, Whitney English, Jennifer Gooch Hummer, Melissa Amster, Nigel Marsh, DayNa Decker, Amy Selling, Heather Sonnenberg, Allison Winn Scotch, Bibi Kasrai, Karen Sutton, Samantha Ettus, and Pam Yudko (as of press time). This endeavor is so close to my heart, and your participation and enthusiasm mean the world. I look forward to continuing the interview series and hope that some of my readers will participate as well.
Thank you to the wonderfully benevolent book bloggers who are so supportive of my work and the authors who are incredible advisors and sounding boards for me as I navigate life as a novelist. I am blown away by the kindness of the women’s fiction community and am grateful that they have welcomed me in. Special thanks to bloggers Jenny O’Regan, Melissa Amster, Erin Baker, Rhiannon Johnson, and Tara Caudle, and authors Kristin Harmel, Jennifer Gooch Hummer, Emily Liebert, Annabel Monaghan, Colleen Oakes, and Eileen Palma.
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