His fingers dug into Brian’s nape as Terry held him in place, controlling the pace. He palmed Brian’s cock with the other, leaving him incapable of doing anything other than holding on for the ride. He gripped Terry’s hips. His body became a mass of nerve endings sending him into sensory overload. Out of control didn’t come close to describing what it was like to be with Terry. Brian could jack off a million times and never recreate the sensation of Terry’s fingers wrapped around his dick. Every time he ventured near the edge of orgasm, Terry slowed his pace, drawing him back. It was the sweetest torture. In an attempt at getting even, Brian towed him closer. With a roll of his hips, he allowed the friction of their wet skin to brush Terry’s dick, drawing a satisfying moan from his throat. He should’ve known it wouldn’t be that easy. Terry released his hold. With the wall holding him up, Brian watched through half-closed lids as Terry squirted a generous amount of body wash in his hand. He swiped it over Brian’s skin until it foamed, slipping down his frame. The expression Terry wore was hot as hell as he followed the motion of his hands with his eyes. It was obvious he was every bit as ready to explode as Brian, but he didn’t rush.
Brian experienced an odd mixture of impatience and steady calm. He wanted everything, and he needed it now, but he equally savored every second. Terry seemed so absorbed in his task, when he spoke it startled Brian.
“You’re like a sickness for me.” His gaze lifted from where he watched his hands to Brian’s face. The earnestness of his words shined in his eyes. “I’m addicted to being in love with you.”
It was as if Terry managed to describe every one of Brian’s emotions in a single sentence. There wasn’t a cure or rehab he could enter. Terry was a permanent affliction. Brian nodded. “For real, you’re under my skin.”
He couldn’t stand another second without tasting Terry. He closed the distance between them, taking Terry’s bottom lip between his. Sliding his tongue across it, Brian savored the texture. He repeated the motion until he coaxed Terry into chasing after him. The moment he did, Brian sealed his mouth over Terry’s, matching him stroke for stroke. He pulled away long enough to rinse away the soap and turn the water off.
“No more teasing,” he said as he reclaimed Terry’s mouth. Without giving up his prize, he reached past Terry and pushed the shower door open. He urged him backward. Terry moved but it wasn’t quick enough to Brian’s way of thinking. When he switched from Brian’s lips to his jaw, Brian heard himself beg. “Please? I’ve been missing you for too long.” At his confession, Terry ripped open the bathroom drawer and pulled out a handful of condoms. Brian didn’t stop moving. He refused to give Terry time to close it. A low laugh slipped past his lips when Brian nearly barreled him down. At the sound, Brian made a second confession. “I need to feel you inside me.”
They didn’t make it to the bed. Utilizing a flawless ankle pick, Terry hooked Brian’s foot with his, taking him down on the bedroom floor. As if a testament to the man’s controlled strength, even in his weakened state, Terry ensured Brian landed softly on the carpet. Terry followed him down. Brian flattened his palms against the floor beside him in an attempt to cling to his sanity as Terry kissed a path down his body. With his focus locked on the things Terry was doing to him, Brian swore he could feel every single one of Terry’s taste buds swiping over his skin.
Wet heat closed around the crown of his dick. His hips left the floor, fingers digging into the carpet. He barely registered the sound of Terry ripping open the condom. His body was on fire. Drawing his knees up, Brian lost himself in the sensation of Terry’s throat tightening around his cock. Terry dipped lower. He lapped at Brian’s balls before moving to circle his asshole with the tip of his tongue. Brian fought to drag air into his lungs. A noise came from deep inside him. He was helpless to stop it from leaving his lips. As if it was what Terry had been waiting for, he shifted positions. Between Brian’s thighs, Terry held his stare as he pressed his way inside. His heavy-lidded gaze had Brian reaching down and fisting his own cock. The things Terry did to his body were secondary to what he did to Brian’s mind.
“Let me have it.”
At Terry’s demand, Brian’s skin pulled tight for half a second before an orgasm crashed over him. Terry’s eyes fell closed as hot liquid filled the space between them, coating both their stomachs. Brian couldn’t tear his eyes away from the man above him as the tremors ran through him and Terry pumped inside him. A line formed between his brows and the cords in his neck stood out, signaling Terry had reached the edge.
Brian strained against him determined to leave him gasping. When Terry released a hoarse cry, Brian moved up onto his elbows. Capturing Terry’s mouth, he did his best to memorize the way the sound felt against his tongue. Hooking Brian’s knee with his forearm, Terry rolled, taking Brian with him. He found himself straddling Terry’s hips.
After one final brush of lips on lips, Brian set his forehead against Terry’s, inhaling his presence into his lungs. In a desperate attempt at expressing the emotion bursting from inside him, Brian said the first that came to mind, “You make me dream.”
He didn’t know how else to explain the way Terry made him envision endless days of living exactly as they were right now. Terry cupped his face, forcing him to hold his stare. “Sixty years.” The force in which Terry said the two words left Brian with no doubt that it had been a vow. “Everyone promises forever,” he explained. “I swear I will give you at least sixty years.”
Brian couldn’t breathe. He recognized the look of determination in Terry’s eyes. It was the same one he’d seen when he’d been bent on training him. In that moment, Brian knew if Terry never did another thing, he would give him the sixty years he’d promised simply because he’d vowed to do so.
Swallowing past the lump growing in his throat, Brian nodded. “Sixty years,” he agreed.
* * * * *
“Where’s Terry?” Kip asked around a bite of toast.
“He’s still sleeping.” As if needing to make a liar of him, Terry rounded the corner. A smile lit his face at the sight of them sitting at the kitchen island.
“Who’s still sleeping?” Terry asked, kissing Brian before he had a chance to answer. Shirtless and wearing a pair of jeans still unbuttoned at the waist, Terry made Brian want to whimper because they weren’t alone.
With her toast halfway to her mouth, Kip gave Terry a small wave the moment he came up for air. “Hi.”
“You must be Kip.”
Brian could hear the laughter in Terry’s voice. Brian comforted himself that he hadn’t been lying about her not being stashed in one of the spare bedrooms. He’d called her the moment he’d gotten out of bed, giving her the all-clear and Cameron, who’d been there visiting, had brought her straight over. Cameron hadn’t stayed long and since he was in his police uniform, Brian assumed he was on his way to work. If Kip was the least bit uncomfortable with being surrounded by strangers, she didn’t utter a word of complaint.
“I am. You must be Terry.” He winked in answer, turning his back on them to grab a drink out of the fridge. Kip caught Brian’s eye, mouthing “wow” before Terry could catch her. A ridiculous rush of heat hit his face. Dropping the toast, Kip cleared her throat. “Don’t worry. I don’t intend to take over your home. McKenna said she’d give me a job at the bookstore and I’ll start looking for an apartment right away.”
Terry leaned back against the counter. Crossing one ankle over the other, he shook the small bottle of orange juice while silently assessing her. “Is Josh the father of your baby?”
At Terry’s question, Kip’s expression went blank. Brian knew how much she hated talking about her problems. “What does that have to do with anything?” she asked in a hollow tone, avoiding his question.
“You’ll stay here.”
Brian wanted to laugh. Kip’s expression turned mutinous at Terry’s announcement and he knew she was about to see the stubborn side of the man Brian loved.
“I can’t invade your home like tha
t. It’s not right.”
Terry tilted his head to the side but his expression remained bland. “Says who?”
“Says me,” Kip shot back.
“Since it’s my home being invaded, your opinion doesn’t count.”
Kip looked at Brian obviously seeking help. He smiled. Terry drank his juice, unfazed by her ire. “You said he was conceited. You didn’t say he was bossy too.”
Terry smirked. Damn. Brian had missed that look. “I’m all things magnificent,” Terry said, setting the bottle aside before adding, “and Josh is crazy. When he comes to his senses, and he will, he’ll be looking for you. Do you really intend to stand against him without any protection?”
Brian could see her beginning to panic. When her shoulders squared, Brian almost groaned.
“I’m assuming by your statement, you intend to be around that long.” Brian sucked in a hiss. At the sound, Kip met his gaze. “I’m not taking it back. Have you asked him? I mean straight up asked him if he’s going to die? You deserve to know the truth.”
“Kip,” Brian began but Terry cut him off.
“No. It’s okay. She’s right.” He moved to stand behind Brian. Wrapping his arms around him, Terry set his chin on Brian’s shoulder. Tilting his head, Brian brought Terry’s face into focus. He was staring at Kip. Brian held his breath. “I need a stem cell transplant and a drug that hasn’t been approved by the FDA yet. Without that, yes, I will die.” Brian’s eyes fell closed and Terry’s hold tightened. “I’m on a waiting list. The drug company is only allowed to release this medicine to a set number of people each year while it’s still in the testing stages but I’ve promised Brian sixty years and I still owe him sixty-one of those so I have faith.” Brian couldn’t believe how much humor Terry had in his voice as he said the words.
“How does that work?”
Kip sounded genuinely interested. Brian still couldn’t open his eyes. Reality looked too bleak. Terry pressed his lips to his cheek several times. He could feel the smile shaping the man’s lips in each kiss. The final one landed near his ear and lingered.
“I promised,” Terry whispered against his skin and Brian’s chest squeezed. He opened his eyes, unable to hold back a smile at the words. Terry wouldn’t leave him. Obviously having received the desired effect, Terry switched his attention back to Kip. “It’s like this. I said I’d give him sixty years of my life so I have to live at least—”
Kip waved a dismissive hand, cutting off his explanation. “I meant your treatment. Tell me how that works.”
“Sure. Seeing as how I don’t have any close relatives there’s little to no chance of me ever being able to find a matching stem cell donor, so the doctors have to use my own. Basically, they’ll remove my piddling amount of stem cells and freeze them. I’ll get a massive dose of chemo and radiation to kill the cancer. Once it’s dead, they’ll give me back my stem cells along with the new drug. It will help me grow new, fat, healthy and cancer-free cells. All better,” he finished with a flourish.
“How long will it take for you to get approved for this medicine?”
She had all the tough questions and Brian was glad for it since he didn’t think he could make his throat work properly at the moment. He felt the change in Terry. Some of the happiness left his voice when he answered.
“It could be a long wait. You know how the government holds shit up.”
Brian kept his gaze locked on Kip’s face. He wanted to look at Terry but he was scared of what he would see in his expression. Kip chewed on her bottom lip. Staring off into space, she seemed to turn the problem over in her mind. When she met Brian’s stare once more, a look of determination entered her eyes before she switched her attention to Terry.
“How concerned are you over the legality of obtaining this drug?”
“I promised Brian sixty years,” Terry repeated as if it explained exactly how far he would go, and indeed, it did.
Kip nodded. Twisting in her seat, she snagged her purse from the back of the barstool. Brian watched in silence as she dug around inside coming out with her cell phone. Terry brushed his fingertips along Brian’s arm in an absent motion as he too watched Kip’s every move. Brian absorbed the sensation of Terry’s touch. Kip’s fingers moved over the phone for a minute before she seemed to find what she was looking for. She set the device on speaker and left it sitting on the island. As it rang, she glanced at Terry.
“Write down the details of what you need.” Even though neither of them understood what was going on, Terry moved away to do as she said, digging around in the junk drawer until he came up with a pad of paper and pen at the same time Kip’s call was answered.
“Hello.”
At the sound of the man’s heavy Russian accent, an affectionate smile touched Kip’s lips. “Konstantin.”
“Kipley,” the man breathed, sounding entirely too satisfied. “How have you been?” Kip tilted her chin back and blinked rapidly at the ceiling as she answered.
“Oh, you know me. I always land on my feet. I got to ride in a police car this morning.”
A loud litany of Russian rang through the line. Kip released a watery laugh as the tears she’d been holding back spilled over her lashes.
“Yes. I know it wasn’t a first for me, but I was riding up front this time and it certainly did bring back memories.”
The man continued speaking in Russian even though Kip answered in English. It was obvious she understood his every word. Terry handed her the paper. She nodded her thanks, swiping at her cheeks and continuing to listen to whatever the man was saying. When it became apparent, he didn’t intend to slow, Kip interrupted him.
“Konstantin, I need something. It’s important.” Her words were met with heavy silence. Kip chewed on her bottom lip again.
“Tell me.”
At his barked command, Kip’s eyes closed in obvious relief and she explained the situation before adding in the details Terry had written down for her. After she spelled the name of the medicine for him, he switched back to speaking Russian and Kip glanced at her watch, nodding.
“Yes. That’s good.” She paused a moment before adding, “Thank you. This means the world to me.”
“Ah. Kipley. It pleases me to bring you pleasure.” There was no mistaking the innuendo. It was as if Kip turned inside herself at the statement. A sardonic smile twisted her lips. When she spoke again, it was barely a whisper.
“But the price is so high.”
“Oh my love,” he said, sounding sad. “Nothing in this world is free. Eventually we all must pay up, eh?”
“Yes,” she agreed.
“You are not allowed to be sad. Now, I must go move the mountains and make you smile again. Goodbye for now.”
“For now,” Kip agreed as she pushed the phone away, appearing almost unwilling to look at either of them. They were both watching her intently. “The two of you should go back to bed,” she said after a minute, still not looking at them.
Terry made an impatient gesture. “Being as how I just got up, I’m not feeling especially tired. However, I am experiencing an overload of curiosity mixed a huge helping of what the hell is going on?”
Brian nodded. “Yeah. What he said.”
She toyed with the napkin at the edge of her plate. “I didn’t say a word about sleeping. The two of should go back to bed and enjoy your time together. In about twenty-four hours or so, your name will hit the top of that list and you’ll have to head back to the hospital for treatment if you don’t want to miss your turn.”
Kip managed something Brian never thought he’d live to see. Terry’s mouth fell open in surprise. She’d robbed him of speech. Brian was scared to hope and something didn’t feel right. Kip didn’t seem happy for someone who’d just arranged a miracle. Even after she’d been abandoned in a bar by the father of her baby, Brian had never seen her look as broken as she did now.
“Who was that?”
Her lips twisted. “I’m not sure you really want to know the answer to tha
t. Now, seriously, go spend some time with Terry before he has to go.”
“He will,” Terry answered for him. “After you answer his question, who was that on the phone?”
“Konstantin Danshov.”
She was right. They didn’t want to know. Konstantin Danshov had—at one time— been one of hockey’s greatest players until he was discovered running a sophisticated drug ring inside the US and was deported back to Russia to stand trial. Even with his player status, the news might have died down before someone like Brian ever remembered his name. That is, until it came to light after his deportation that he was a member of the Russian mafia. Not some flunky either, but someone who got things done. From what Brian understood, the man had been good looking and charming. Those two traits had carried him far. Once he was out of the hands of the US government, his position left him free of any punishment for his crimes. Brian didn’t know what to say. Obviously mistaking his silence for condemnation, Kip spoke up.
“How much do you remember about the night I helped you back to your room from the bar?”
“Not much,” Brian admitted. Terry snorted but Brian refused to look over at him. He could feel his knowing laughter. Kip gave him a luminous smile.
“All the way back to the room, you ran down the list of reasons why you were outraged over the knowledge Terry was slipping away from you. Right before you passed out, a sense of peace seemed to settle over you.” She made a helpless gesture. “I don’t know how else to explain the complete shift in your mood. Even though you were beyond fucked up, you looked at me seeming completely lucid and said, “I’m not sorry. Even at his worst, he’s better than everyone else and for a little while, he was mine.”
Unattainable (No Rival Book 5) Page 11
