“It’s my fault,” he said, pleased more than he should be that she’d noticed. “No reflection on the lovely ladies who live here. I work all the time.”
“It’s just wrong that you’re alone.”
He didn’t want her to think he was socially pathetic. That was his only excuse for saying what he did next. “I wasn’t always alone.”
“Oh?” She took the plug from the bottom of the sink and let the soapy water run out.
“I lived with a woman while finishing my residency. We met at a party. One of the other residents talked me into going because I needed to have some fun.”
“Did you?” Dawn asked.
“Probably.” Jon shrugged. “We really hit it off and pretty soon we moved in together. I was planning to propose after passing my boards. I had a job offer from the hospital and life seemed to have fallen into place according to my plan.”
“What happened?” She lifted one shoulder. “Obviously something did because you’re still a bachelor.”
“Everything changed. I lost a patient.” The pain of the memory was familiar, a scar that would never disappear. “It was one of those things. She was getting better and I was sure she’d be going home within a day or two. Then there was a turn for the worse and she died.”
“I’m sorry.” There was an expression in Dawn’s eyes that said she understood and had experienced the same thing. “I’ve seen it, too. Science and medicine can’t explain why a patient suddenly goes downhill. They do studies about the will to survive but how do you bottle that and give it to someone?”
“It’s not like I didn’t know what I was getting into when I became a doctor. You lose patients. It goes with the territory. You always do your best and put the rest in God’s hands. But this one got to me. She was eight. Funny. Quirky. Precocious. Still, it shouldn’t have hit me so hard, but...” He met her gaze. “It did. I took the job at Thunder Canyon Resort to figure out my next career move.”
“That’s understandable. Anyone who works with life and death should be all in. Soul-searching is healthy—for you but also for the patients you see. If your heart isn’t in it and you hold back...it’s not fair to the people who put their lives in your hands.”
“The woman in my life didn’t see it that way.” He thought of that woman, the one he’d planned to get down on one knee for. Black hair, green eyes, beautiful Beth. An accountant. Numbers were her thing, not people. “When I told her about the job, she told me that moving to the backwoods of Montana wasn’t what she’d signed up for.”
“Witch,” Dawn muttered.
“She accused me of being a cowboy.”
One corner of her mouth curved up. “When we first met, that day at the clinic, I thought you were a cowboy.”
Incredibly, that made him smile, but it faded just as abruptly. “In Rust Creek Falls it’s not unusual to see a cowboy. She didn’t mean it as a compliment, more an indictment of my character. That I shoot first and ask questions later because I didn’t discuss my decision with her first.”
“Well, she has a point.”
“I agree. And I admitted as much to her. After a little groveling, I suggested we talk about things.”
“Obviously that didn’t work.”
“I’ll never know. She refused to discuss anything and walked out.”
Dawn stared at him for several moments, letting his words sink in. “You were going to propose to her?”
“I’d already bought the ring.”
“Oh, boy. There’s no easy way to say this. She did you a big favor, Jon.” There was absolute conviction in her voice, but white-hot anger underlined every word she said.
“It didn’t feel that way.”
“She wasn’t in love with you.”
“How do you figure?” Jon was drawn to the compassion and kindness in her blue eyes.
“If you’re in love with someone you don’t leave at the first bump in the road. Clearly getting out was her go-to move and she didn’t have deep feelings for you, the kind that last forever. If not then, sooner or later she would have walked out when you hit a rough patch.”
“She was the first one I let in.” He met her gaze and from the expression in her eyes he could tell she was feeling sorry for him. Couldn’t have that. “Oh, I dated from time to time, but there was no one special. I never lived with anyone else. When she was gone, it was more solitary than I expected. That’s kind of where I was when I found Rerun. He was alone, too.”
“Oh, Jon—” Her expression brimmed with sympathy and support when she put her hand on his arm.
Her fingers were still wet from washing dishes but he could feel the heat in them and the touch set off a fire inside him. He saw it on her face, too, the moment when sympathy turned to something else. Awareness.
Jon would never be sure who moved first, but suddenly she was pressed against him and he lowered his mouth to hers.
Chapter Eight
Dawn froze when Jon folded her into his arms, then almost immediately heat surrounded her. There was a very good chance she would go up in flames and that was just fine with her. The moment her fingers had touched the skin of his forearm she knew he’d felt the spark, too.
His lips were soft, searching and warm. She savored the feel of them against her own and couldn’t suppress a sigh. He lifted a hand, then gently brushed his knuckles over her cheek before cupping it in his wide palm. Her insides danced with joy at the sweet, intimate contact. Her hormones bubbled up, letting her know they might be rusty, but were still in good working order even though she hadn’t been kissed in a long time.
And what a kiss. Jon might be a workaholic, but he sure knew how to take over a kiss and hit the high notes. He curved his hand around her neck and slid his fingers into her hair. Dawn rested her palms on his chest and felt the rapid beat of his heart. Her own was hammering just as hard.
His kisses were easy and slow, not pushy or insistent, just the right amount of pressure. Tenderly he brushed the curtain of her hair aside before his mouth moved to the expanse of her neck. And that was more than okay with her. Dawn tilted her head, giving him all the access he could want. He took it without hesitation and nibbled his way to the pulse point. The soft attention to that tender spot made her shiver and she arched against him.
She heard the sound of their mingled breathing, rapid and harsh, just before the distinctive ring of her cell phone. It was coming from her purse which was on the kitchen counter across from them, right where she’d left it earlier that night.
Jon lifted his head and looked at her, his eyes dark and smoky. “That’s your phone.”
“Yeah. My mom’s ring.” She sounded breathless, probably because she was.
“You should probably get that.” His voice was ragged.
“It’s okay. I can call her back. She understands. I’ll let it go to voice mail.” It was times like this when voice mail came in especially handy.
“She might need something,” he said, annoyingly sensible.
She also noted that a conscience coupled with a finely tuned sense of responsibility was a very inconvenient thing. Dawn nodded, then cleared her throat and moved away to the counter across from him. It was a narrow space but she could no longer feel the heat of his body and felt cold. She grabbed her black leather purse and the phone stashed in one of the outside pockets where she could easily find it.
She looked at the caller ID and saw her mother’s name, then answered. “Hi, Mom.”
“Oh—Dawn—?”
“You sound surprised. Did you butt dial?” And interrupt the best kiss she’d had in—maybe ever.
“No, sweetie. I was going to leave a message. Didn’t expect you to pick up, what with the staff party going on.”
She and Jon were staff and it was a party—for two. One that made her feel all wa
rm and gooey inside and she wanted to get back to the action. “I just happened to hear my phone. Is everything okay?”
“Fine. I just wondered if you could swing by Crawford’s store before you come home and pick up a couple of things for breakfast in the morning.”
She sneaked a look at Jon but his back was to her. She couldn’t swear to it, but she thought there was tension in his broad shoulders. “It might not be open.”
“If it is would you get some English muffins and a couple of potatoes? And some eggs?”
“Okay.” This couldn’t have waited until morning? she thought.
“I just thought it would be easier to go now, since you’re already out,” Glory said.
It was a little scary that her mother could read her mind. And she shouldn’t be so irritated. It wasn’t as if the woman didn’t frequently call Dawn to stop and get something before she came home. Mostly Dawn was happy to help. Right at this particular moment? Not so much. “Sure, Mom. I can do that.”
“You sound funny. Is everything okay, Dawn?”
Duh, she thought. Who wouldn’t sound funny when a man you didn’t even think you liked not so long ago kissed the living daylights out of you?
She took a deep breath. “Fine, Mom.”
“Did Jon make it to the party?”
“Yes. Everyone did.”
“Good. I liked him. He seems to be a very nice young man.”
He was more than that. Hot was the word that came to mind. “I have to go, Mom.”
“Right. Sorry to bother you, sweetie.”
“No problem. If Crawford’s is still open I’ll pick up the stuff.”
“Thanks. See you later. Have fun.”
That was Dawn’s plan. To pick up where they’d left off. She put her phone back into the pocket of her purse, then turned to see Jon studying her. “That was my mom,” she said lamely.
“So you said. And what with you calling her Mom...” One corner of his mouth curved up. His look had changed from the heated, slightly frustrated one he’d had when her phone rang. Now he simply looked guarded.
So she put up her guard, too, and stayed right where she was. “You look as if you’ve got something on your mind.”
“Yeah.” He dragged his fingers through his hair.
“Just a wild guess...” Keep it light, she warned herself. Don’t let him see that what happened had mattered to her. “You’re having second thoughts about that kiss.”
“Very perceptive, Nurse Laramie.” His intense expression didn’t match the teasing words.
“Don’t worry. I won’t read anything into it.”
His smile was rueful. “Just so you know, I didn’t stay to help because I planned that.”
So, it was spontaneous. That was both better and worse.
“It never crossed my mind.” She sincerely meant that. She’d let go of her notion about him being the devious new doctor after the night they’d gone to the Ace in the Hole.
“This is ironic, really, when you think about it.”
“What’s that?” She leaned back against the counter, leaving the narrow center of the kitchen between them.
“We...got close at an employee bonding party.” He folded his arms across his broad chest. “I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the sort of bonding Emmet had in mind when he decided to have us all over.”
“Probably not,” she agreed.
Dawn hoped that comment had come out of her mouth as cool and collected as it had sounded in her head. Because she felt the exact opposite of cool and collected. Her state of mind could best be described as mortified. With a capital M.
She’d been ready and willing to let Jon Clifton—Dr. Jon Clifton—have his way with her. In their boss’s house, no less. On top of that, she’d been prepared to love every minute of it. Neither of them had planned for that to happen and getting carried away was understandable. She’d have gone anywhere with him if that call hadn’t interrupted them. It was a cooling off period, literally. Time to take a breather and let rational thought come back. But she’d been ready, even eager, to ignore rational thought and pick up right where they’d left off.
All of that was bad enough, but not completely humiliating. What bothered her most was that a single touch of his lips to hers could so easily make her forget how much she never again wanted to be the doctor/nurse affair cliché. She never again wanted to feel so disgraced and ashamed. And now she needed to do some serious damage control.
She met his gaze directly, letting him see she was on the same page. “Look, Jon, no one understands better than me why this is a very bad idea. Anything personal between us, or anyone else at the clinic for that matter, could potentially undermine the team Emmet is building. I have enormous respect for him and would never jeopardize the work he’s doing here in Rust Creek Falls.”
“I couldn’t have said it better.”
“Good. And the two of us have buried the hatchet. We’re clicking at the clinic and it wouldn’t be smart to start anything. We work too closely together. Everyone notices our interaction. There’s a tone to set.”
“Agreed.”
She forced a smile. “So, still friends?”
“If that’s what you want.” There was an edge to his voice, a rough sound that didn’t quite mesh with what he said. Did he want to be more than friends?
Dawn couldn’t go there. “I do.”
That was a half-truth. She didn’t want to go back to the tension between them and probably couldn’t even if she tried. He was a good guy. And he’d given her a taste, a glimpse, of what it might feel like to be more than friends. For a lot of reasons it was best not to go there. But she couldn’t help being the tiniest bit disappointed that he didn’t push back just a little.
“Then friends it is.”
She put a cheerfulness she didn’t feel into her words. “What a relief.”
And that was a flat-out lie. She wasn’t at all relieved. He’d said all the right words, but she was almost sure he hadn’t stopped looking at her with a dark intensity that said he was lying, too.
But they’d decided to pretend it never happened. Good luck with that.
* * *
A while after leaving Emmet’s, Dawn walked into her house and quietly tiptoed into the kitchen. Right away she noticed there were new lights installed underneath the cupboards and they were on, illuminating the shadowy corners. Hank had been here. The thought didn’t sit well, but there was nothing to be done. And the brightness was very cool.
She set the grocery bags on the counter, trying to keep them from rustling. The TV was on in the family room and Glory was curled up on the couch, probably sleeping. At least Dawn hoped so. Jon’s kiss had thrown her off balance and she hadn’t steadied herself yet. She wasn’t ready to pretend to her mom that she hadn’t experienced something epic.
“Hi, sweetie.” Glory sat up and stretched, then rolled off the couch before padding into the kitchen. “You don’t have to be quiet.”
“I didn’t want to disturb you. How come you’re not in bed?”
“It’s only nine o’clock. I know my life is boring, but bedtime now would just be pathetic, even for me.”
“You just work so hard. Sometimes six days a week. It’s a grind and...” Dawn shrugged.
“That busy schedule is exactly why I’m still up. Tomorrow is my carved-in-stone day off and it’s Saturday night. I decided to get wild and stay up till ten. Maybe later.”
“Yeah.” Dawn tsked. “It’s so out of control here the sheriff will be stopping by any minute to warn you to keep the noise down because the neighbors are complaining.”
“It could happen.” Glory grinned. “But probably not tonight.”
“That’s what I thought.” She reached into one grocery bag and pulled out the carton of eggs and pac
kage of English muffins. “I guess since you sent me to the store for this stuff we’re having the traditional big Sunday family breakfast tomorrow.”
“Yes. Marina is bringing baby Sydney over and the Laramie women are going to hang out.” She looked at the bags. “But this is more than I asked you to get.”
“I thought we could make omelets. The mushrooms, spinach and tomatoes looked really good.” Dawn pulled out plastic bags of vegetables. There was no need to explain that she’d walked up and down the aisles at Crawford’s trying to shake off the memory of Jon’s kiss.
“That sounds like a plan and they do look wonderful,” Glory said, eyeing everything.
Together they washed the fresh produce, then dried and stored it in Ziploc bags that went into the refrigerator. After folding the brown bags Dawn stored them to the side under the kitchen sink.
“Okay, Mom, I’ll see you in the morning. Good night.” She started out of the kitchen and nearly made it, too.
“Wait, sweetie. You didn’t tell me how the party was.”
“Good. Fun.” She forced a positive note into her voice that was the complete opposite of her real feelings.
“Details would be nice,” her mom urged.
“Like I told you, the whole staff was there,” she said, crossing her fingers behind her back. They’d all been there, but not when her mom had called. “Including the new doctor and nurse I told you about.”
“Right. How did they get along with everyone?”
“Lorajean is going to fit in great. Steve Shepard...” She shrugged. “Don’t know yet.”
Glory leaned back against the counter and folded her arms over her chest. “Why?”
“He doesn’t say much.” Unlike Jon, who practically gave her his life story that first day at the clinic.
Her Maverick M.D. Page 10
