“There’s always something that can be done differently,” Evan replied. “But that doesn’t mean the outcome would have been different.”
That’s about as clear as mud, I thought and Evan laughed.
“Sorry,” he said. “A lot of times I go into these things knowing what I mean so it’s hard to explain it to someone else. I already understand so it seems obvious to me. I forget that not everyone knows what I know.”
“What DO you know?” I asked, wanting simply to understand what he understood so that everything would be as clear to me as it was to him.
“I know that you have the freedom to choose on your own and that’s exactly what you did,” Evan said, taking another Cheeto from the bag and devouring it after inspecting it on all sides again.
“And had I chosen differently?” I asked, thinking about the look on Abigail’s face when I tried to explain the situation with Chloe to her.
“Is that what you want?” Evan asked, a third Cheeto halfway to his lips.
I sighed. As obvious as Evan thought his knowledge was, I felt as if nothing I thought I knew was true any longer.
After a long pause, I finally decided to answer the best I could. “I guess,” I said, not sure where it would get me.
“So you want to take back what happened with Chloe,” Evan began, eyeing the Cheeto bag longingly, “and perhaps continue your relationship with Abigail instead?”
I sat back in my chair, remembering the good times I had with Chloe and all of the time I had enjoyed with Ian. I didn’t want to erase it. But Evan was right, if I had the chance and knew the outcome, I WOULD do things differently.
“How would you change it all?” Evan asked, reading my thoughts before I could answer and reaching for another Cheeto while I thought.
“I would still do the promo drive,” I said. The lemonade stand, after all, was what had saved Ian’s life and he deserved to live. “And I would still be a part of their lives,” I paused again, thinking about how the outcome might have been different had I not gotten so invested so quickly. “But I’d protect my heart more,” I continued. “I wouldn’t get involved in their little family because in the back of my mind, I always knew about Greg and the possibility that he could come back.”
Evan nodded, satisfied with my answer, the Cheetos, or both. “He IS her husband,” he said as if the man had every right to come back to his wife and move her away without even a moment’s notice.
I squeezed my lips together. When he put it that way, I really should have done things differently. I should have given her space to figure out her emotions for her husband before I tried to interject myself into her family life. But I most certainly did not regret what I had done for Ian.
“What do I do now?” I asked, hoping that the answer would be easy.
“Well,” said Evan, licking his thumb and forefinger. “I guess we get to do it all again.”
“What?” I asked, having no idea where this conversation was going to lead.
“You want to make changes. You want to do things differently. So let’s do it. Let’s do it all again.”
Was this guy talking about going back in time? Did he have a time traveling car in the backyard or something?
“I’m no Michael J. Fox,” Evan said, a huge grin on his face.
That much I could see. He would have towered over Michael J. Fox and his hair was way too long to make him a teen idol.
“And we’re not going back to the future,” he continued, grabbing two Cheetos at once and throwing them into his mouth without inspection. “We’re going to the past to correct what went wrong.”
“You can do that?” I asked, incredulous as to what his ‘spiritual authority’ really covered.
“I can,” he said. “And I will. All I need from you is a precise time. Think about where it all went wrong and we’ll go from there.”
I allowed myself to dig through my memories with Chloe and Ian, all of which were painful because of my relationship with them. I thought about going back to the beginning and not bothering to fix her car, but she really needed that vehicle. Then, I thought about not inviting her to the concert in the first place, but I didn’t want to take that joy away from Ian.
I could have maybe gone back to the concert itself and put Chloe in her place the minute she kissed me on the cheek, but I didn’t even want to change that. I finally settled on the moment I wanted to change the most so that the rest of the events could fall into place in a different manner.
“The diner,” I said. “I want to go back to the diner when I tell Chloe about my idea for the promo drive.”
“That was when things really began between you,” Evan said in a matter of fact voice, as if he had been there with us.
“Yes, I think so,” I said, remembering the way she had thrown herself into my arms and how I had held her against me. Perhaps she had simply been showing gratitude and relief and if I had done something differently, I could have stopped the relationship from blossoming in the first place.
“So be it,” Evan said as he placed two more Cheetos in his mouth. He looked longingly at the bag and I wondered if there was no such thing as food where he came from. Any food, since he had eaten the apples and carrots just as well.
Evan raised his eyebrows, leaned back in his chair and laced his fingers behind his head. “Choose differently,” he said, and my kitchen began to fade around me as the diner materialized.
I recognized the scene immediately. I had just asked Cal where Chloe was and if I could speak to her and he had sent me to the back room. I had arrived in the storeroom at the back of the diner and found Chloe bent over the box of sugar packages. I had startled her and she still had a look of shock on her face.
This time, when I told her about my idea for the promo drive, I didn’t move any closer. I kept a good six feet of distance between us. I thought that perhaps that would make the difference, but when Chloe heard my idea, she covered the distance in two seconds flat and threw herself into my arms just like before. I knew this was the time that I had to make a difference or things would play out just as they did before.
“I have something else to tell you,” I said, not allowing her to let the idea fully sink in before I went on. “I’ve met a really special woman and I hope to be in a relationship soon.”
Chloe pulled away slightly so she could look me in the eye, “Okay,” she said, drawing the word out. “Why are you telling me this?”
She didn’t look disappointed at all, just a little taken aback. I knew in that instant that it HAD been me all along. Somehow, I had forced the issue. I had drawn her to me. Had I allowed her to live her life, she never would have fallen for me in the first place.
“We’ll be working closely together,” I said, releasing her from my grip. “I just wanted you to know so that there aren’t any misunderstandings.”
Chloe shook her head. “Understood. When do we get started?”
I left the diner without a deep moment happening between Chloe and me. I left feeling as if I had a friend for life, but nothing more. I left with the option of saving Ian, and still dating Abigail. I couldn’t wait for my date with her. Things were about to change and I was going to make it happen right this time.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
I flew through the next few days, making all of the arrangements I had made before for the lemonade stand. Things were much easier the second time around because I knew who would give me what and I knew what businesses were going to shoot me down. It saved a lot of time because there were several calls and contacts I simply didn’t have to make. I was able to make the schedule for the day before I had all of the volunteers lined up because I already knew who would want to do what. Everything was still fresh in my mind and I wondered if I could do every job that way from now on.
Then I remembered what I had gone through with Chloe and I decided I would rather do my work from scratch than go through another heart break. But, since I was doing things differently this time around
, at least I wouldn’t have to worry about that.
Instead of waiting to hear from Abigail like I had last time, I contacted her first and asked her if she would be available on our agreed upon day for supper at Luigi’s, an upscale Italian restaurant downtown known for both its food and atmosphere. It was a romantic restaurant and any couple that went there had a purpose. My purpose was to make sure that Abigail understood my intentions towards her. I would still have to explain what she saw at the concert between me and Chloe, but after that, I would only have to explain what I was feeling towards her.
Abigail emailed me back quickly, agreeing to the time and place. She even said she was anxious to see me and I felt my heart swell. All of the feelings I had for her came rushing back and made me wonder why I had chosen Chloe in the first place. If it had not been for her need and Ian, perhaps I would have made a different decision last time.
But none of that mattered now. Evan had somehow given me a second chance and I was not going to botch it this time.
Since I was able to get through my work on the lemonade stand faster, I was also able to make it home for a shower in order to prepare for my evening out with Abigail. We had still agreed upon an early supper at 5 p.m. but this time, I planned for the date to last much longer than the few minutes it had gone last time.
I put on a nice shirt with a collar, though I skipped the tie because I just never felt right wearing them. I wanted to be myself and let Abigail know what she was getting with me. It was time to show her who I was so she would know who I was and what I wanted from a relationship with her.
I combed my wet hair and splashed on a little cologne. This time, I was really going to put my best foot forward. I even arrived at the restaurant well in advance and waited by the front door, watching for her to pull up. The only change I would make in the date up to that point was I would have offered to pick her up instead of meeting her at the restaurant. But I planned on there being many more dates in the future so I could make that adjustment next time.
Abigail climbed out of her car in a cute navy blue sundress, her red hair sparkling around her shoulders and her smile sparkling on her face.
“Evan!” she called out to me as she waved, as if I hadn’t had my eyes on her the minute she had gotten out of the car.
I approached the parking lot to meet her in the middle. “You look fantastic,” I said, taking her cute dimples in with my eyes and lingering on the shimmer in her hair.
“Thanks,” she said. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”
We walked into the restaurant and secured a nice table in the corner where we would have a little privacy. The waiter, who had a cloth napkin draped over his arm, promised to bring us water and bread while we looked over the menu.
When Abigail began to apologize about her anger over what she had seen at the concert, just as she had last time, I interrupted. It was my turn to change the story.
“You had every right to feel that way,” I said. “It should be me apologizing to you. You probably felt as if I had been leading you on and that I was seeing other people in addition to you.”
Abigail blushed a bit. It had been exactly what she had been thinking and I was certain of it.
“Let me assure you,” I continued, feeling as if I knew just what to say and what not to say since I had certainly said the wrong thing last time, “there is no one else that interests me.”
I then told Abigail that Chloe was the woman whose car I had bumped and that I had formed a friendship with her and her son since that time.
“Her son is really sick,” I told her, something I had not mentioned last time because I felt I needed to be loyal to Chloe’s privacy. “And I offered to help raise money for him to get the surgery he needs through a station promo drive.”
“That’s amazing,” Abigail said, her eyes lighting up over the darkness in the room.
“I just really want him to have a chance at a good, long life. He deserves that much.”
“You said that was his first concert?” she asked, laying her hand on the table palm down.
I nodded. “He loved it.”
“No wonder his mother was so grateful. I completely understand why she kissed you. I feel pretty silly for doubting you.”
“Don’t,” I said, laying my hand over hers. “You had every right to imagine the worst. You don’t really know me that well. But I want to change that. I want to know everything about you and I want you to know me.”
“I’d like that too,” Abigail said, glancing down at my hand covering hers. So far, it was going well. Much better than last time. She had already stormed out by this point.
“Next time, you choose the place,” I said, in order to reassure her that this wasn’t a one shot deal. “Or we can do something different.”
“I love to bowl,” Abigail said as she let out a slight giggle. “I know it’s weird, but I find it soothing.”
“Bowling it is,” I said and with that, the waiter returned with our waters and we ordered our meals.
The date could not have gone better had I written the evening myself. After our meal, we were both so full we barely felt like we could move. In order to work off the heavy pasta, we went for a walk around the neighborhood and Abigail pointed out some interesting buildings I had never noticed before.
She told me about the pressures her editor was putting on her over the new book and I told her about my own busy work schedule along with the added hours I had to put in for the lemonade stand.
“I’d love to help with that,” she said as I wound my fingers through hers and she placed her free hand on my arm. “If you need help that day or with anything before then, just say the word.”
“I’ll do that,” I said, smiling down on her. “You might be sorry you offered.”
“I don’t think so,” she said with a smile of her own. “But you can try me.”
We got back to the restaurant parking lot all too soon and it was starting to get late. With my early show looming each weekday, I knew it was time to call it a night.
“Thank you for hearing me out,” I said as Abigail turned toward me when we reached her car.
“Thanks for explaining. I still feel bad about assuming the worst.”
“Don’t mention it,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “It’s completely understandable. Just know that it won’t happen again, even if it was nothing to begin with.”
Abigail’s smile widened and I saw her large teeth at their full height. “It better not,” she said, poking me in the side.
We ended the night with a nice, long, lingering hug. I still didn’t feel right about kissing her, but I felt like I had given her enough reassurance about where things were going that she didn’t really need that yet. I wanted to respect her enough to give her the time and space she needed to really fall for me…and me for her…before we took that next step.
As I drove away that night, I silently thanked Evan. He did the best thing he could have possibly done for me. He had given me a second chance and I was able to do things right this time around. He had let me choose and I had chosen wrong, but now, I was able to go back and finish things in a new way.
At that point, I would have bought Evan a whole palate of Cheetos if that was what he wanted as a thank you. He had given me a new lease on life and another chance at love. I was certain I would be eternally grateful for the happiness that waited for me in the near future.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
The next week flew by as I continued my preparations for the lemonade stand and dated Abigail as time allowed. My relationship with Chloe grew into a wonderful friendship and I still got to see Ian on occasion. I promised that I would be there for his surgery and my optimism that we would raise the money had only grown since I had already lived through the experience once.
I saw Abigail a few times that week and she was planning on helping at the lemonade stand. I knew we would need volunteers early on since there would be people waiting in line before the stand even op
ened.
On the day of the promo drive for Ian, I was able to introduce Abigail and Chloe.
“So you’re the one he’s been talking about,” Chloe said with a smile as Ian his behind her braid.
“All good things, I hope,” Abigail said in return, wiping her hands on her jean shorts so she could shake Chloe’s extended palm. “And this must be Ian,” she said, turning her attention to the blonde boy that I had grown to love twice in a row.
It was strange for me to see the two women together, knowing what Chloe had once been to me and what Abigail was becoming. But I was glad that they knew about each other. There were no secrets and I hoped that the two of them would become friends.
The promo drive went even better than last time, since I was able to concentrate my work on avenues I knew would bear fruit. When Chloe returned at the end of the day, she and Abigail had a few good laughs together and I was optimistic about their relationship.
Instead of going to Chloe’s apartment to tell her about the results that evening, I simply called her. I didn’t want her gratitude to spill over into any other emotions and get confusing and I wanted to spend time talking to Abigail that evening as well. I called Abigail after talking with Chloe and informed her of the news.
“When is the surgery going to be?” she asked, excitedly.
“Late next week,” I said. “But Ian’s going to be fine, don’t worry.”
“He’s a sweet boy,” she said, sighing on the other end of the phone.
“The best,” I said.
From there, our conversation turned to how we could help Chloe during Ian’s recovery and Abigail promised to bring her a few meals at home so that she wouldn’t’ have to worry about cooking much. I wasn’t sure if the changes I had made in the past would affect Greg’s return or not. Chloe was still on the national news with Ian and Greg’s brother was likely still lurking around somewhere. But what happened in her life was her business. She was just a good friend and my heart was not as emotionally involved.
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