by B. L. Dawn
Times of Change is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2021 by B.L. Dawn
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any manner without the copyright owner’s written permission except for the use of quotations in a book review. For more information, address: [email protected]
Formatting: Enchanted Ink Publishing
ISBN 978 – 1 – 954009-02-8 (eBook)
Published by Obscure Lunar Publishing LLC
www.bldawn.com
Thank you Sam J. and Pam B.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 1
Tatum Roloff had lost everything the day her parents were killed. When she was young, she never contemplated whether she would lose it all or whether she would just stay on the same boring path she had always been accustom to. It only takes a split second for worlds to shift, lives to end, roles to change, memories to erase, sleepless nights to occur, and secrets to be withheld.
Tatum considered the human world to be a savior and a curse for her and what was left of her family. Seven years ago, wolf shifters attacked her pack at Blackwater, killing everyone in the village. It wasn’t normal for such an attack to occur. Usually, there was an alpha who wanted a pack and would fight the alpha in charge for the right to lead. She never could figure out why another pack slaughtered her whole village.
Now, Tatum found herself in the role of caregiver to her two younger brothers and her great grandfather. Well, her oldest brother James was in college, but she still felt like she held some responsibility for him until he found his way in the world.
With no wolf pack of their own, they learned to survive after escaping Blackwater, which was her old pack’s territory, located in the warm climates of Texas. They had fled to a small city in West Virginia called Parkersburg. Grandpa had been too old to take care of them, and her brothers too young. Therefore, Tatum did what she had to do. She took care of what family she had left, vowing to be the female her parents tried to raise her to be even though this new life meant bending the roles of a shifter female. If there could have been another way, she would have taken it.
Tatum had to decide between two of the most essential rules she had been raised with. Her family’s rule, that she would do whatever it took to care for the family, and the shifter rule, that only allowed males to run the household. If she allowed her family to starve, she was turning her back on everything her parents had taught her. So, Tatum bucked the traditional shifter patriarchy until her brothers could get on their feet.
Tatum let that thought go as she had many times before with a shrug. She flipped through her wilderness magazine. If she had to be honest with herself, she didn’t actually mind finding her way in the human world. After all, she was good at her job, had two good friends, and felt important.
The downfall to all this is that human males didn’t find her attractive. They looked at her, sometimes they even stared at her, but no one ever approached her.
Shit, she probably didn’t look like the shifter females either. Even if she found her way back to the shifter males, they may not want to mate with her. They might even be repulsed once they find out that she brought home the bacon.
All things considered, the years had been good—if you consider good to be food on the table, Tatum sleeping on a small couch in a small apartment, and nights full of nightmares that, honestly, she should have been desensitized to by now. The flashbacks of her father’s bloody form reaching out for her as he stretched across the hardwood floor of their kitchen played over and over in her mind. After all these years, there was always a jolt of pain in her chest, anger in her mind, and sadness in her heart.
Yes, life was a hair better than bad. Money, cleaning, planning, organizing were the things she found comfort in, which were all things she could control. Everything outside those skills was good some days and shit the others.
But regardless of them living without a pack, shifting separate from one another at night, and always being careful of their identities, Tatum tried to look on the bright side of things. She failed miserably most of the time, but she kept a decent front. What else could she do? Life, as humans would say, is what you make it.
Tatum flushed the toilet to conclude her time alone in the small bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror, disliking what looked back at her—one blue eye, one brown, the height of a shifter male, arm muscles that were chiseled like she worked out seven days a week, and stomach muscles that looked like she prided herself on her dominance. Her face wasn’t ugly, but the eyes made her look freaky.
The few feminine things about Tatum that she enjoyed were her long caramel brown hair, her large breast, and her bubble ass. She was too masculine for her liking, and she supposed human males thought so too.
If Destiny would allow her to recreate herself, she would pick out a petite body, a round face, and smooth, slender arms. She supposed that she liked her wolf form better, but then again, there was never a time when she got to see herself in wolf form. It wasn’t like there were mirrors out in the small patch of woods behind their house.
As Tatum bent over, she tried to be careful not to bump into the wall with her ass. Tatum grabbed the Windex under the sink and cleaned the mirror that hung on the dark-wood panels. It was a lousy little bathroom, but at least she bought a bright purple shower curtain with a floral design on it to take her focus off the dark walls.
Tatum walked to the kitchen and sat at her small kitchen table with a calendar and a pen in her hand, trying to gain control of her thoughts. She tapped the pen on the edge of the table. The kitchen and living room were an open concept. There was a small, square table with four chairs and a couch that separated the two areas. It wasn’t much, but it had just what they needed to survive. In the small space, there was a fridge with a small L-shaped countertop divided by a stove. A microwave took up what little space they had on the countertop, and a laundry closet was on the opposite wall.
In the living room, a couch faced an old television that lined the outer wall. There was a rocking chair in the corner and a table beside the couch with a landline phone sitting on it. The apartment came furnished this way, and she was glad that she didn’t have to spend her money on such things. Saving money was something she prided herself on. Unlike most humans that she knew, she didn’t care if the furniture was old, as long as it appeared clean and was functional.
Loud spurts of snoring interrupted her thoughts. Her great grandfather was sleeping on her bed…couch…whatever it was, snoring like a freight train. Tatum looked in his direction.
How much longer did he have in this world? At two-hundred and two years old, he wasn’t doing well. In her opinion, Grandpa would do bett
er in a pack. What would she do when he passed away? She wanted to conduct the passing ritual that the Blackwater Pack performed to honor the dead, but a pack was necessary to complete it, along with a pyre and a private territory to burn the body. At least that’s what James had told her happened when shifters passed away.
She couldn’t remember much about life before the attack at Blackwater. Trauma, being the bitch that it was, stole those memories from her.
Tatum looked back at the calendar, writing out the schedule for the following week. She jotted down her work hours, the times for Eli’s therapy sessions, and his martial arts classes, and James’s graduation on Friday.
The door closed, and Tatum looked up as Eli threw up his hand, giving her a quick wave. Tatum smiled at him, making her way over to the stove to heat up some food.
Turning around, she asked, “Hey, Eli. How does it feel to be out for the summer?”
Eli’s hands signed, I’m thankful it’s over. I hate that place. He eyed her getting ready to make food. I don’t want to eat right now.
Tatum nodded and turned the stove off. Today was his last day of the eleventh grade, and thank Destiny for that. The bi-weekly calls from the principal were getting old. Eli, who had not spoken a word since the attack, constantly got in trouble, and she didn’t enjoy listening to the principal scold her about her younger brother’s behavior. The principal would have already kicked him out, but Eli had a case of childhood trauma, and for some reason, that meant he “got away with murder,” as the humans would say.
He went to therapy, but it didn’t help. Her and Eli had to come up with lies to tell the therapist, so the sessions lost all effectiveness. The kid was smart and made good grades, but Tatum wished his attitude had been better. Her best friend, Alma, had suggested martial arts classes to help focus his energy and control his emotions. It wasn’t helping.
Maybe his wolf was growing restless. After all, he was eighteen, and he was getting closer to his mature mating age. His hormones were most likely all over the place. Destiny knew hers were going crazy. Why did Destiny make shifters so much more animalistic when it came to mating? She didn’t know. It was like sex was always at the forefront of her mind.
Eli walked over and made himself a glass of water.
Tatum leaned against the counter, crossing her arms over her chest. “You know what I think the problem is?”
Eli set his glass down and signed, I can’t wait to find out.
“I think your animal magnetism is driving the other females crazy, and that’s why those males don’t like you.”
Eli’s eyes grew large as a smile spread across his face. You’re crazy.
“I love seeing your smile.” Tatum chuckled as she made her way across the kitchen and opened the laundry closet. She switched laundry before doing another load. Eli stepped toward her, indicating that he wanted to say something. She looked over to him with her eyebrows raised, waiting to see what he had to say.
Eli sighed with a scowl on his face. You know you don’t have to do everything around here. I can help if you’d just let me.
Tatum pushed the start button. She looked at Eli, waving a hand through the air, dismissively. “This is not your job, it’s my job. I need to help make things run smoothly for the males of the household. Your job will come before you know it. As soon as you find a mate and take over your role as the male of the household, the circle will be complete.”
Grabbing a towel, she folded it and sat it on top of the washer.
Eli tapped her shoulder to get her attention. Did they also teach you to get an education and a job and provide for three males on top of everything else?
“I’m only doing that because of our circumstances. We have to survive until—”
Until Grandpa is dead, and your brothers can make it without you? Then what? What will be your job when that happens? Are James or I going to be allowed to take care of you one day? Eli signed.
Tatum shook her head, hating the thought of her brothers being burdened with her while trying to start their own families. “No, you would take care of your mate and young.” Tatum snatched another towel in aggravation, folding it and slamming it down on the washer.
She supposed Eli had a point. When Tatum’s family moved on with their lives and away from her, she would have no reason to work other than to take care of herself. Her friends, Alma and Eddie, would most likely find families of their own, too. The thought of her being alone scared the hell out of her. Two hundred years was a long time to feel lonely. A knot formed in her throat.
Eli tapped her again.
“WHAT?” Tatum snapped as her eyes met his.
You need to look at me so I can talk to you.
“Then make it quick. I’m busy, and you need to get ready to leave.”
Eli rolled his eyes. This is not your job. You are more than a female who does chores or a superstore manager. You keep pushing down who you truly are. And one day, you’re going to lose yourself or go crazy.
Tatum crossed her arms as tears stung her eyes. “I’m fine. I’m happy here. We’re all safe.”
Eli shook his head. You’re not happy, Sister.
Tatum rolled her eyes, grabbing another towel. She hated it when Eli started this bullshit with her. Didn’t he understand that she needed to keep the pack culture going? If she didn’t teach her brothers the roles of a male shifter, how would they learn them? Yes, she took on the female and male roles according to the shifter culture, but she didn’t want to be viewed as a male who provided for the household. She was already bothered by her toned body. What male would want her if she took his role in life or could overpower him in some way? She couldn’t think of anyone who would want to do that.
Love is what she craved, but not the fake, bullshit, type of stuff. She wanted it to be real—a male who would adore her and cherish her. Nothing would make her happier than finding a male who would hold her in his arms, listen to her deepest thoughts, understand everything about her, and find her attractive. It would have to be her true mate.
The truth of the matter was, she would probably never find her true mate. Maybe she should just settle for sex and be done with it. If the human males would give her a chance, she could test out the waters.
Tatum cleared her throat, trying to change the subject. “Hey, Eli. I know you have a martial arts class tonight, and you probably want tomorrow to yourself, but I want you to go shopping with Alma and me.” She looked over her shoulder, placing the newly folded towel with the others.
You have lost your mind. Why would I want to go shopping with females?
“Well, I want to get you something nice to wear for James’s graduation. And we need a big alpha male like yourself to keep us safe. I might even need help to pick something out for Grandpa.”
Eli paused. His light violet-blue eyes shined as he cocked an eyebrow. Eli ran his fingers through his light blondish hair and sighed. He signed, I guess you win. I’ll go with you females and keep you safe, even though you scare the hell out of most males.
“Oh, geez, thanks.”
Anytime. Eli grinned while walking to the back of the house. Grandpa sat up, stretching his arms as his old bones popped. “Hey Grandpa, how are you feeling?”
“Pretty good, Tate.” Grandpa stood. His back bowed as he shuffled to the kitchen table.
Grandpa wasn’t one to talk much. It was like he was keeping secrets. The past was never up for conversation or it was always swept under the rug. Tatum relentlessly tried to ask him about her past. He knew she couldn’t remember anything before the attack on Blackwater, but he stayed quiet. She loved the old shifter, but she wanted to shake the information out of him.
“Grandpa, I need you to pack a bag for Friday. We’ll be staying for one night.”
“Sounds fine. I’ll be glad to see James.”
Eli walked back through the house dressed in his gi, tying his black belt around his waist. I’m ready to go.
Tatum grabbed her keys and headed behind their apartment to the parking lot. The minute they turned the corner, a group of females were hanging around a black Corvette. They glanced up, staring at Eli. Tatum was sure at any minute drool was going to dribble from their lips. She looked over at her brother. Eli wasn’t a little pup anymore. He was a muscular young male with broad shoulders, a square jaw, and a nice golden tan.
A human male with uneven hazel eyes, combed back hair, and pale skin stuck his head out of the car window. “Hey, Roloff! Aren’t you going to say anything to the ladies?” The male smirked. “Ha! Must not be interested in ladies, huh?”
The male was laughing at Eli’s expense. It made her blood boil, but Tatum grabbed Eli’s arm and shoved him toward the car, not wanting a fight to break out.
“Don’t give into him, Eli. He’s jealous because those females are checking you out. Don’t give him power over you. He shouldn’t be able to control your moods.”
Tatum opened the door and pushed him in her SUV. She ran around, started the car, and took off out of the parking lot. Eli was signing all over the place. His face was red and frustrated.
“Hey, slow down. I can’t read that fast while I’m driving.”
Eli’s eyes narrowed. I could take him out. I know it wouldn’t be a fair fight, but I could take him out.
“I know you could. That guy is a big dumbass. Don’t let him get to you. If you lost control while fighting, you could shift. And no one wants that.”
You think I don’t know that. You think I don’t know that shifting is a huge no-go. I’m sick of this. We don’t get to shift during the day, and we still have to be careful at night. And that’s if we even get to go. We never run together. I want a pack where I can be myself. I want to be free. I can’t take this anymore. My wolf is eating me alive.
Tatum regarded him with worry and sadness in her heart. “You’ve never told me that before.”
