He exhaled deeply as if he’d been holding his breath. “Yes.”
The valet brought around their vehicle and handed him the keys. Chad gave him a tip, but she could see the hesitancy in the boy’s eyes as he accepted the bill. She looked up at Chad and saw that his eyes were bloodshot. He looked furious, but she realized it wasn’t anger, it was sadness. He was on the verge of tears. How could a man who’d been ready to fight not ten minutes earlier look as if he would break down and cry any second.
Chad shut the door behind her, then walked around and got in on his side. He drove the car away from the entrance, but then pulled into a parking spot at the end of the property. He turned off the car and turned to her. “I’m truly sorry,” he repeated.
“Chad,” she started, then took a breath before speaking, “I’m not good at confrontation. I used to bury my head beneath my pillow as I did the other night. Childish, I know, but I couldn’t stand to hear my parents scream at each other night after night. I’m very skittish, I guess, and I don’t even know why. There’s no basis for it. Like my fear of heights, and by the way I’m claustrophobic, too.” She noticed he tried to smile, but he obviously wasn’t sure where she was going with her blabbering. “But what you did back there frightened me —”
“Oh, Cassandra, please don’t ever be afraid of me.” He sighed. “God … I’m so sorry. I would never hurt you; you have to know that. My entire life people have been frightened of me. My parents didn’t know how to deal with me, so they locked me up. Jasmine was the only one who’d never been afraid of me and my mood swings. She helped me … I don’t lose control anymore.” He reached for her face, and she flinched, so he drew back his hand. “Do you believe Jasmine would have pushed us together if she’d believed for a moment I was dangerous? And I truly believe that was her intention; she knew you would be perfect for me and I you.”
Cassandra picked up his hand and pressed it to her cheek, embarrassed that she’d flinched. She wasn’t afraid of Chad. She couldn’t imagine him ever hurting her. “You’re forgiven, Chad, and I’m not afraid of you.” He released a breath after her comment, and she continued, “I guess ‘frightened’ was the wrong word. It just makes me uncomfortable. I want to run away from conflict.”
“I’m sorry, Cassandra.”
“There’s another thing you should know about me. I forgive and forget. If I say you’re forgiven, then you are. You don’t have to keep apologizing.”
He pulled her to him. “Thank you, Cassandra. I swear I’ll never lose my cool again. I just couldn’t stand the thought of another man putting his hands on you. Next time could you smack the idiot yourself? I promise I’ll back you up.”
She pulled back from his embrace. “Chad …”
“I’m just kidding.” He looked down sheepishly. “But not entirely,” he muttered under his breath.
She shook her head at his words.
He shrugged. “I’m a man,” he offered as a poor defense. “All men think as I do about their women, I’m sure. They’re just not able to back up their talk with actions.”
She pulled her brows together and stared at him. “And you are?”
“I told you I was a difficult teenager. Unfortunately, I’ve been in my share of fights, but as I said, that’s behind me. I swear nothing would have happened. I know how to diffuse a situation.”
She sat back in her seat and pulled her seatbelt on, indicating it was time to leave. “I noticed.”
Chad took her cue, put the vehicle in drive, and pulled out of the parking lot.
***
When they returned to the hotel, Chad opened the door for Cassandra, but otherwise kept his hands to himself.
He’d screwed up royally and had possibly ruined their honeymoon. How could he have lost it like that? It wasn’t as if the idiot had kissed her or grabbed her; he’d simply put his hand on her shoulder. But that was all it’d taken for him to literally see red. It was as if the room had suddenly gone dark as his pressure climbed through the roof. He’d never been so enraged.
He’d been in fights many times, but usually it was because he’d instigated it and wanted to take out his anger on something or someone. But it had been years since he’d lost it completely. Jasmine had taught him how to control his anger.
Michelle had never affected him again the way she did after the first time. She’d carry on with other men, always hanging on the guys at the store. When they would go out dancing, she’d dance with ‘old friends’ as she referred to them. He knew they weren’t all old acquaintances, but somehow, it never affected him the way it had tonight.
He simply wouldn’t allow another man to come near Cassandra; she was his, forever. But he would remain composed next time. She knew how he felt, so she certainly wouldn’t instigate any reaction, he hoped.
He sat down on the sofa, leaning back against the cushion, still lost in thought, hoping he hadn’t ruined their entire weekend over his blunder. She’d said she’d forgiven him, but he wasn’t sure how much she could really forgive.
Cassandra said nothing as she walked to the dresser, pulled out clothes, then disappeared into the bathroom. So that was it then. She was going to let him suffer, it seemed. He’d hoped that she’d have come over to him, wrapped her arms around him, and assured him she loved him, but instead, she’d left the room. What did he expect? He’d brought this entirely on himself.
Only a few minutes passed when he heard the door open again. Good. At least she wasn’t going to bury her head under a pillow and make him go looking for her.
Cassandra stepped around the sofa, wearing nothing but a white, lacy babydoll. It was low-cut in the front and covered her lower half. It was sheer and as sexy as anything he’d ever seen, even more than the lingerie she’d worn under her wedding dress.
She stepped in front of him, lowering her body onto his lap, and then wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him lightly. “I want to see you smile, Chad,” she said in between kisses. “I want to see the man I whitewater kayaked with, the guy who took me hiking, then jumped off a cliff with me in his arms, the gentleman who loves to teach me everything about his state, and even how to dance, whether I want to learn or not. I feel as though I make you too intense, as if you’re in pain.”
He looked up at her and smiled. It wasn’t what she’d requested … it felt forced. Although he was very happy at the moment, she was correct. She made him feel very intense.
He knew from the beginning she’d eventually drive him insane. “No one has ever affected me the way you do, Cassandra. You make me want to laugh, you make me want to cry, and right now … well, I don’t even want to describe that emotion. I’m happy … believe me. I’ve never been happier. But these feelings are all so new, and I’m not as overconfident as you think.”
She released a soft sigh. “I’ll never leave you, Chad. I’m very good with commitments. When I decide on something, I see it to the end. I never get apathetic or anxious. It would drive my friend Karen crazy. I’m completely content to eat the same thing practically every day and can even read a book ten times if it makes me happy. And you, Chad, make me very happy, so please relax. I’ll never leave you.”
He pulled her alongside him as he stretched out the length of the sofa. “Thank you, Cassandra … for giving me another chance. I promise I won’t let you down. I’m going to love you forever, and yet, I’ll try not to be too intense. You make me very happy. I’m sorry if it doesn’t seem that way, but believe me, I’ve never been so utterly happy in my entire life.” He slid his hand over her hip, loving the way the silky fabric felt beneath his hand. She was so incredibly feminine and soft. “And this,” he lifted the gown from her leg, “this makes me very happy too. Man, but you are sexy.”
She nuzzled her head under his chin and kissed him on the neck. Liquid heat rushed through his body from a simple kiss. Michelle had never done that. She always went right for the kill. She would only kiss him on the lips and was always too forceful. Cassandra continued kissing hi
m, nibbling her way up to his ear. “I love you, Chad, and I would like it very much if you made love to me now.”
That was all he needed to hear. He pulled her up into his arms. The sofa was entirely too small for him to make love to her as he wanted.
He spent the next hour doing everything he could to make her feel as good as she made him feel. He pushed her until she begged him for release.
The honeymoon certainly wasn’t over. He was so thankful … all he could do was concentrate on her pleasure. Until, finally, she forced him to finish. He couldn’t control his reactions when she decided it was time. The way she moved beneath him and held onto him tightly, he didn’t want it to ever end. However, his body had other ideas, and he was only so strong.
After it was over, he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her head to his chest as he caressed her long, beautiful hair. He sighed in contentment, and she looked up at him with adoration. She loved him. She loved him for exactly the person he was, despite his ignorant side. He would never lose control again and cause her to be frightened.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Sunday and Monday passed quickly, and before Chad knew it, it was Tuesday, and they were on a plane returning to their home.
As much fun as the last four days had been, Chad was glad to be returning home, ecstatic Cassandra and he would be starting their life together as husband and wife.
He knew they wouldn’t be making love two and three times a day as they had on their impromptu honeymoon; they did have to work. But now he would anticipate coming home, knowing she would be beside him every night … forever.
The house had been so quiet for too long. Even when Jasmine and his father had been there, he rarely spent time with them. He’d always been in his dungeon, as Jasmine had referred to it.
He glanced at his beautiful wife. “Cassandra,” he started, then stopped. She was just staring out the window as the desert floor disappeared below them.
She released a sigh, then turned to him. “Hmm?”
“What are you thinking about?” he asked, suddenly curious at what had her mind wandering off. It was more important than the question he’d wanted to ask.
“I was just thinking. We should have gone to the Grand Canyon. I always wanted to see it; it always looked so incredible. But after seeing the mountains up in the balloon and horseback riding, I imagine pictures can’t possibly compare to seeing one of the great wonders of the world with your own eyes.”
He cocked his head. “You should have said something. We could’ve gone. I thought about it, but figured I’d already petrified you enough with the hot air balloon and horseback riding.” He chuckled lightly, remembering her face when the horse started down the precipice when they were horseback riding through Red Rock Canyon. He hadn’t considered she’d be afraid of heights on a horse; though, he should have when she had trouble just jumping out of his truck. He pressed his hand to her cheek. “We have loads of time. After our six months are up, we can vacation anywhere. I hear Sedona, Arizona is spectacular.
She smiled effortlessly, then leaned back against the headrest. She looked tired. “That sounds nice.”
“So I was wondering,” Chad continued with the question he’d originally meant to ask. “Where would you like to stay when we get home, the loft or the dungeon?”
“Wherever you are,” she replied softly.
Chad chuckled, pleased with her response. “Well, I was certainly hoping you would want to sleep with me, but which room do you prefer?”
“Oh. I like the loft … but I don’t like the sun in the morning. We need to get automatic blinds, and then I think the loft would be nice. Besides, it has a larger bathroom and closet.”
“You’re right; that settles it. I’ll order the blinds tomorrow, along with the running boards for the F-150 I keep promising.”
“I’m in no hurry for the running boards; I rather enjoy our current arrangement.” Her smile grew wider as she veiled her eyes with her lashes. “I only acted as if it bothered me. Secretly, I reveled in the feeling of your hands around my waist. My heart beat so frantically whenever you touched me, I was certain you could hear it thumping.”
“As flattering as that is,” he said, breathing in deeply, amazed that such a simple comment could have his insides burning. They had a long trip, and it would be very late when they finally returned home this evening. He wondered if she’d consider joining the mile-high club but then shook the thoughts out of his head. “You may need to take the truck on occasion, so I will have to honor my word and have them installed.”
She shrugged in agreement, then rested her head on his shoulder. “Are you nervous at all, Chad? About returning home and telling everyone you married me after only five days?”
“Nervous? Never. I couldn’t care less what anyone thinks.” He’d stopped worrying about what others thought years ago. Kept him out of a lot of fights. “Are you?”
“Not really, I suppose. I don’t know anyone enough to care. Karen may think I’m crazy, but she’d always said when I met the man of my dreams, he would sweep me off my feet, and I would end up marrying him. I guess she was right.”
Chad squeezed her hand lightly. A twinge of jealousy surged through him. He hoped she wouldn’t want to move back to Florida just because of her best friend. “I don’t know that I will really care for Karen; she sounds rather wild from everything you’ve mentioned.”
“Well, she’s married now, so I’m sure she’s settled down. Besides, no matter how hard she tried to corrupt me, her actions never rubbed off. My father didn’t care much for her either,” she admitted. “But she’s my only friend. I hope we’ll see each other in the future. Maybe you and her husband will get along, and we can visit Florida sometime?”
“Maybe,” he agreed, but hesitantly. He’d never really cared for Florida when Michelle would drag him to visit her parents. “Florida’s hot though …”
“Spring is incredible, especially March,” she said, defending her state.
“We can go whenever you want, Cassie. I’m positive I’ll have a wonderful time with you.” Of course, he would. She wasn’t Michelle, and she certainly wouldn’t dress in a bathing suit like the one Michelle had worn. He’d already seen Cassandra’s; it was very modest. He chastised himself. Why couldn’t he stop behaving so old-fashioned like — and jealous?
The weeks passed swiftly once they returned home, and before Chad knew it, it was Independence weekend, the busiest weekend of the year. The ROCK would be cranking busy.
Cassandra had ventured with him every day on the rafts, learning how to navigate their passengers through the waters of all the rivers they guided. She was certainly able to guide her own team, but he enjoyed having her with him. Even when he chose to take his kayak, he stayed near her raft, and they would take turns navigating the vacationers down the rapids.
Thankfully, Michelle had not been too much of a pest. Still, she’d been rude. She’d showed up one afternoon after they’d finished rafting and waited until Cassandra went to change to approach him.
He’d explained to Michelle that they’d married in Vegas, thinking that would be the end of the conversation.
She scoffed, saying, “You’ll be back, Chad … you always come back. She’ll leave you, and then you’ll be on your hands and knees, begging me to take you back.”
He’d laughed hysterically. “No, Michelle … I won’t, not that Cassie will ever leave me. But even if she did, I’d never take you back. Not now that I know what a real woman is and how true love feels.” Michelle had stormed off after his assertion, and he’d never been happier to see her go. He didn’t tell Cassandra about their interlude, as he was sure it’d only cause her heartache.
As always, they drove to the store together. When they arrived, however, Cassandra made a beeline for the upstairs office.
Chad waited patiently, assuming she’d forgotten something. Ten minutes passed, and she didn’t come down. They had a big day today … they needed to get going.
As soon as he walked in the office, Cassandra clicked off the computer, then turned to the files. “Are you coming, Cassie? We’re going to be busy from start to finish today.”
Without looking up, she shook her head, then reached for a tissue. “I’m not going on the raft today. I want to go through our insurance paperwork. I’ve been meaning to do it for a while. I’m not sure how long ago our parents followed up with an attorney to make sure we are covered for all legalities.”
But I need you today, Cassandra,” he complained. “This is one of the busiest weekends of the year. We can’t be short a rafting guide.”
She looked up at him and shook her head again. “I can’t, Chad, really. Not today.”
Why all of a sudden today? Why wouldn’t she have done this earlier in the week? Why would she wait until Friday? Her eyes were puffy, and she kept sniffling. Had she been crying? “Are you okay? Are you crying?”
She rolled the chair to the opposite side of the office. “I’m fine. It’s just allergies.”
Chad lowered his eyes in confusion. It didn’t make sense. “Cassandra, this can’t be that important. It certainly can wait until next week.”
“I’m an attorney, Chad, and it is that important. I can’t go with you today. You’ll survive without me. You managed before I started helping out.” She smiled, but her words were firm.
He huffed, not understanding. He didn’t want to manage without her. But in the month and a half they’d been together, he’d realized it was futile to argue with Cassandra. When she made up her mind, she meant it. He turned and walked out, irritated. It just didn’t make sense.
At the end of the day, Chad stored his gear, changed into dry clothes, and then went into the store to find Cassandra. Brandy was at the front.
His eyes darted around the store. “Hey, Bran. Is Cassie upstairs?” Usually she was downstairs, waiting for him to finish his last run so they could go home.
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