by Ava Zavora
To: Adam -
My dear Adam
What an amazing day this has been. Tonight I went to an astronomy lecture on top of a mountain. I saw stars being born - they're called nebulae. The night sky was brilliant from the mountaintop - never seen it like that before. I wish you had been with me. I think you would have been at home there - in the dark, at the edge of a forest, on top of the world.
I felt lit up. I half-expected to glow in the dark. I still can't believe what we talked about this weekend. What we explored together. How you made me feel. I'm stunned. No one has ever made me feel the way you do.
Was it just a twisted, beautiful dream I had? Is it all true?
I'll write to you when I wake.
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 4:21 AM
To: Eden E
Good morning, darling
I wish I had been with you. It sounds like you enjoyed it. I hope you realize that although I wanted us to continue our fantasy, I never want to keep you from doing anything on your list, or being out in the world. Your independence is important to me.
If it was a dream, then I dreamt it with you. It is all true. I want to surrender complete control to you.
I want you more than I’ve ever wanted any woman.
I will do what I promised. I’ll build us a very special room. We’ll have our bed against a wall where you can shackle me. And you will have the only key to the locks. My body is yours to do with as you please.
When you described that scenario last night, squeezing my balls harder and harder until I remained still for you, I was amazed. It actually sounded nice. A month ago it would have annoyed me, the idea of a woman doing that to me.
I can't wait to hear you, I miss you.
X
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 8:59 AM
To: Adam -
Good morning, darling!
It didn't scare you? Have you ever experimented with such a scenario?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:01 AM
To: Eden E
Nooo. Never.
All those things you described and said you wanted to do with/to me are completely new to me. It didn't scare me. I think it turned you on?
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:03 AM
To: Adam -
Yes. I've never had such a talk with a man. It's always been ... the desire to do things to me.
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:10 AM
To: Eden E
I did research on that contraption we talked about while I was waiting for you to wake up. Apparently there are two kinds. One that makes an attempt at an erection painful (the inside is ribbed). The other just prevents it without pain.
I can imagine you trapping me physically a lot and doing many curious things to my balls, my “cannoli,” etc.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:13 AM
To: Adam -
You wouldn't mind wearing such a thing? When would you wear it? When you weren't with me? How does the one that's painless work exactly?
What curious things? Painful things?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:15 AM
To: Eden E
I think it's just basically a metal ring with some kind of sponge on the inside. I thought it'd be permanent and you'd take it off when I was allowed to have an erection?
With you, it would be daunting, yet strangely it seems to make sense.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:15 AM
To: Adam -
How often do you usually get an erection?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:15 AM
To: Eden E
A lot in bed. Sometimes during the day. Often when we're talking.
I think you will experiment with me a lot. I don't know what curious things. Your other idea of restraining me while you experimented with my cannoli. Hot peppers, feathers. You sounded so excited about it.
I imagine you seeing what kind of pain I can handle without being upset with you, and then that would be the level, so to speak.
And remember, I have a high tolerance for pain, much more than other people. So don’t feel shy or hesitant.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:20 AM
To: Adam -
So if you start getting one, that ring with the sponge would prohibit it getting larger and your thingy would just deflate? Wouldn't it strain against the spongy wall?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:23 AM
To: Eden E
My “thingy” – Eden, I adore you.
Yes, that's what it would do. Apparently not; apparently it just prevents it establishing itself. Do you still like the idea?
And you didn't answer about the balls/pain thing?
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:26 AM
To: Adam -
I think we'll begin with your ideas. If it occurs to you and you feel comfortable sharing them with me then it means you're comfortable trying it out. Then perhaps I can expand upon your ideas.
I would like to touch you freely and see how much pleasure and pain you can tolerate.
I'd like to see it on you, yes. And it is so tempting to have your manhood under lock with me having the only key.
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:27 AM
To: Eden E
Ironic that you came up with the notion of attacking my balls, and now I have to think of other ways to do it. Haha.
But yes, I'll think about it.
Yes, that's a great idea.
Tell me why it’s so tempting.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:29 AM
To: Adam -
No, you came up with it! I distinctly remember you saying something about me squeezing them. And then I came up with that scenario immediately afterwards.
Because then I know it's mine. Completely.
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:30 AM
To: Eden E
Yes, yes, you're right.
I can really see us doing that. I think once it is on, it will be on permanently. I can imagine you tying me up every time you remove it.
I've never been kicked or kneed in the balls.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:32 AM
To: Adam -
How would it feel, I wonder, underneath your suit as you're going along doing normal tasks in the outside world?
You want me to kick you? Don't ask me to do that! I don’t want to hurt you!
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 9:33 AM
To: Eden E
So we are going to
do this, but in person?
I can imagine you tying me up often, taking it off, playing with me, then putting it back on just as you bring me to the very edge.
Yes I wondered that too ... I wonder if I'd get used to it or always be aware of it?
I want to keep showing you and proving myself to you, always, Eden.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:03 AM
To: Adam -
Tell me what you would do, if you found me in bed wearing those stockings like in the picture, reclining against some pillows, wearing my slip, perhaps reading a book. Tell me.
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:05 AM
To: Eden E
I'd get on my knees in front of you and beg to touch you. I want to devour you. Badly.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:10 AM
To: Adam -
You wouldn't mind doing that? It wouldn't be distasteful to you?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:11 AM
To: Eden E
No. Pleasuring you will make me very happy.
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From: Eden E
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:31 AM
To: Adam -
You can't think of anything you'd like to try that we haven't mentioned yet? Anything you think I may not like?
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From: Adam -
Date: Mon, Aug 20, at 11:33 AM
To: Eden E
Of course there is plenty we can try, it's just at the moment I am so focused on pleasing you.
I can’t wait to continue our exploration tonight. I’m so grateful that you showed your secret side with me, Eden. That you trust me so much.
I want to fulfill every single one of your desires.
Chapter 13
BOOK BOHEMIAN BLOG
POST TITLE: The Awakening by Marianna Devuille
DATE OF POST: August 21
Ambitious. Raw. Painfully beautiful. Stunning. I had very few preconceived notions before my first foray into erotic fiction other than expecting lots of sex scenes. There are multitudes of electrifying sex scenes. But The Awakening was a revelation. A masterpiece of literary writing that happens to be erotic as well. Devuille’s exploration of one woman’s sexual journey, from languishing in an unfulfilled marriage to a passionate but ultimately doomed love affair was riveting, to say the least. I did not, could not, put this book down.
Every woman will see herself in the main character – who is a wife, a friend, a daughter, a mother. They will see themselves in her place and feel as if they were experiencing what she experiences in the book. Some of it is disturbing and uncomfortable. Some of it is exquisite. Some of it is titillating. By the end of her journey, I felt emotionally spent. The Awakening is well worth reading, even if you think you don’t like erotic fiction.
COMMENTS:
Cassie {The Library Eclectic}: What have I started? I guess Beautifully Ravaged was a gateway book. So glad to see you venturing out of your literary comfort zone, Eden. Brava! I’ve heard so many good things about this novel and it looks like they’re all true.
Micha {Page Turner}: You really should warn me before I wander over here. The shock is too much for my delicate constitution. *falls in a dead faint* part deux.
Erin {Bibliology}: Sorry, Micha, I need the smelling salts for myself. *falls in a dead faint*
Alice {The Bluestocking}: At first glance I thought you were reviewing Kate Chopin. At second glance, may I borrow your copy?
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From: Adam -
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 11:15 AM
To: Eden E
I can imagine you tying me up and taking me several times right to the edge, then dressing up really sexily and going out and leaving me still restrained. I'd be frustrated and hard for hours but unable to satisfy myself. Would that excite you, Eden?
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From: Eden E
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 11:18 AM
To: Adam -
I might worry about you too much while I'm away. I'd leave your phone next to you just in case something unexpected happened, like a rat suddenly appeared and was climbing the bed toward your cannoli, mouth open.
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From: Adam -
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 11:21 AM
To: Eden E
Haha, see, even in the midst of planning for my sexual torture, you can't help but care for my safety. That's why I trust you.
I can't wait to build our special room. It will be your kingdom, and I will be your slave in it.
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From: Eden E
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 11:23 AM
To: Adam -
We're building these imaginary rooms together. An imaginary house, an imaginary life. I'd like that - that I can have it all with you. Bedroom time and special room time and it would be a natural, effortless dance between both spaces.
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From: Adam -
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 11:24 AM
To: Eden E
I don't think we're building imaginary anythings. We're planning for our reality, our life.
Well put, I see it that way, a natural, effortless dance. I can see you being merciless in our special room, then hugging and kissing me and being your warm, nurturing self as soon as we walk out.
I wish I was at work with you, underneath your desk. I'd part your thighs and gently tickle you over your panties.
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From: Adam -
Date: Wed, Aug 22, at 11:25 AM
To: Eden E
I feel like I'm becoming obsessed with you.
Eden sighed, her whole body flushed with desire. With every day of long talks and e-mails, she felt herself becoming more and more immersed in the world she and Adam were creating. Neither in Sicily nor in California, it existed somewhere remote, untouched by the outside. It was so exciting and unlike anything she had ever experienced with any man that it felt unreal, yet at the same time, the most real relationship she had ever had. Adam was a mesmerizing voice of seduction, a strong torrent of words that overwhelmed all reason. He filled her every waking thought, he invaded her dreams.
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From: Eden E
Date: Wed, Aug 22 at 2:11 PM
To: Adam -
Sometimes I feel like I want you too much.
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From: Adam -
Date: Wed, Aug 22, at 2:12 PM
To: Eden E
Are you withdrawing from us?
