by Joan Jonker
They hadn’t heard the front door open and jumped when they heard Mr John say, ‘I ordered extra cakes so you could take some home with you.’
Aggie rounded on him. ‘Are you tryin’ to give me a bleedin’ heart attack? If yer want to get rid of me, there’s easier ways than frightenin’ the ruddy life out of me.’
‘I’m glad to see you’re in a happy mood, Agnes. Not that I’ve ever seen you unhappy, but tonight you’re like a bright star shining in a dark overcast sky.’
‘God strewth! The man’s lost his marbles!’ But the affection in Aggie’s eyes belied her tongue. ‘Have you been hittin’ the bottle?’
‘Not yet, Agnes, but later on I shall probably have a dram or six.’ He winked at Ada. ‘And how is Mrs Perkins tonight?’
‘Gettin’ more worried by the minute,’ she admitted. ‘We’d better take these upstairs then I can get washed an’ changed.’
‘There’s plenty of time yet, don’t get flustered. I’ll make a few trips upstairs with these, while you go and do what you have to do.’
Ada didn’t need telling twice. She knew that the dress would give her confidence and couldn’t wait to put it on. She made a dash for the hall, picked up the case and headed for the staff toilet. If anything went wrong tonight it wouldn’t be for want of trying. She didn’t have much but she intended making the most of what she did have.
It was fifteen minutes later when Ada put in an appearance. She looked so different from the woman who’d gone through the toilet door, that Aggie and Mr John stared at her in amazement. Her rich dark hair had been piled on top of her head, leaving her face exposed and revealing her striking features: black, perfectly arched eyebrows above her wide deep brown eyes, a slightly turned-up nose and a firm square chin. And for the first time for as long as she could remember, she was wearing lipstick. It was the cheapest they sold in Woolworth’s, but it was worth the money because it accentuated her full lips. And the dress which fitted her to perfection completed the picture of a very attractive woman.
She stood uncertain, wondering why neither of them said anything. Perhaps she didn’t suit the dress after all, or perhaps her hair looked a mess. Oh dear God, she’d made a laughing stock of herself.
‘I don’t believe it.’ Aggie came towards her, arms outstretched and a tear threatening. ‘Yer look bloody lovely!’
Ada closed her eyes as the older woman held her tight. She felt so relieved she had to bite on the inside of her mouth to stop herself from blabbering. How well she’d look if Mr John’s friends arrived and found her in tears.
Aggie let her go and turned around. ‘Well, what d’yer think of her?’
Mr John was slowly shaking his head from side to side. ‘As you said, Agnes, she looks bloody lovely.’
The old woman put one arm across Ada’s shoulders and pointed the other at Mr John. ‘Yer’d better stop this swearing lark ’cos it’s becomin’ a habit with yer. I’m goin’ to have to watch meself or yer’ll have me at it as well.’ She gave Ada a squeeze. ‘Anyway, yer shouldn’t swear in front of a lady. And by God, this mate of mine looks every inch a lady.’
‘She does indeed, Agnes, she does indeed.’ John could think of many words to describe how Ada looked – words like beautiful or magnificent, but he knew if he uttered them she’d scuttle away like a frightened rabbit. ‘My friends will be very impressed.’
‘Just don’t let them get their hands on her, that’s all,’ Aggie warned. ‘And no swearwords or dirty jokes in front of ’er, d’yer hear? I’ve heard plenty of tales about what blokes get up to when they’re out on the town without their wives. Yer can’t bleedin’ trust them.’
‘Agnes.’ John held out his hands. ‘I can assure you my friends are the epitome of respectability and integrity.’
Aggie’s jaw dropped. ‘The only word I understood in that little lot was me own bleedin’ name! Honest to God, Mr John, sometimes yer sound just like a ruddy dictionary on legs.’
The exchange between her boss and her mate had the effect of calming Ada’s nerves. How could you be nervous and laughing your head off at the same time? ‘If you two intend gettin’ the boxing gloves on, would yer leave it until tomorrow, please, when we’ve got more time? I’ll even be referee, if yer like, but right now there’s far too much to do.’
‘Not for me there isn’t!’ Agnes took her arm from Ada’s shoulder. ‘I’ve done me whack an’ I’m goin’ home, ’cos that’s where I live. Mr John will tell yer what’s what, girl, an’ yer’ll manage fine. The way you look, the men won’t know, or care, whether they’re eatin’ brawn or smoked bleedin’ salmon.’ She put a finger under Ada’s chin and raised her face so their eyes were on a level. ‘You look lovely, girl, just like a film star. I know Mr John won’t let no harm come to yer, but just in case one of his mates misbehaves, then put yer coat on an’ scarper. Yer don’t need to take nothin’ from no one. Okay?’
‘I’ll be all right, Aggie. I’m quite capable of lookin’ after meself. I’m sure everythin’ will run smoothly.’
‘Right, I’ll be on me way then.’ Aggie planted a kiss on her cheek. ‘See yer temorrer, girl.’ As she passed Mr John on her way out, she whispered, ‘You take care of her, d’yer hear?’
‘You have my promise, Agnes.’ John touched her arm. ‘You’re fond of her, aren’t you?’
‘More than fond, Mr John. She’s the daughter I never had.’
Ada felt shy after Aggie had left and she was climbing the stairs with Mr John. ‘If yer’ll tell me what to start with, an’ how to fold the serviettes, I’ll be grateful. And if you want me to offer them a whisky when they arrive, yer’ll have to show me how much to pour into the glass. Once yer’ve showed me, I’ll be fine.’
‘I’ll get the whisky, it’s in the office.’
Ada was rearranging the trays of sandwiches when John came up behind her and touched her shoulder. She spun around to find him standing with his head tilted and a half-smile on his face. ‘I just want to thank you once again for helping me out, I do so much appreciate it. And also to tell you how very lovely you look.’
Ada closed her eyes. It had been so long since a man had paid her a compliment or looked at her with admiration in his eyes, she filled up with emotion. She struggled for composure, telling herself she was just feeling sorry for herself. But the tears wouldn’t be stopped and they trickled through closed lids to run down her cheeks.
John looked on in dismay as the tears flowed. He felt so helpless, didn’t know what to do or say. In the end he took her by the shoulders and asked, ‘Have I said something to upset you?’
‘No! It’s just me bein’ childish.’ Ada brushed the tears away. ‘This has been buildin’ up for a long time. I’ve had nothin’ but heartache and money worries for so long, and when yer down in the gutter yer lose pride in yerself, yer feel worthless. I’d even forgotten what it was like to be a woman. But tonight, in me new second-hand dress which I’m big-headed enough to know looks good on me, and with me hair done decent, I feel like a woman again. I can even remember what it was like to be loved and wanted.’ The tears continued to roll and she used the backs of her hands to wipe them away. ‘I’m sorry, Mr John, yer must think I’m a very stupid woman.’
‘Oh, Ada, my dear.’ John pulled her towards him and rocking her like a child, he told her, ‘You’re far from worthless, or stupid. You’re a very attractive and desirable woman.’
Ada’s head was resting on his chest and she could smell the scent of expensive soap and the whiff of cigars. She felt so contented and at peace with herself, so safe and secure in a man’s arms, it was as though all her troubles had melted away. Then came the intrusion of the front-door bell and she sprang back. ‘Oh my God!’ Her hand flew to her mouth. ‘I’m sorry, Mr John, I don’t know what came over me.’
‘My fault, Ada, not yours.’ John cursed his friends at that moment. ‘Now just keep calm and I’ll go down and let them in. Take their coats as they arrive and put them on the coatstand in my office.’
He started to walk away, stopped, turned and kissed her cheek, then hurriedly left the room.
John’s friends turned out to be so pleasant and friendly that Ada was soon at ease with them. As she was to tell Polly later, they all spoke frightfully far back, but they treated her as an equal. Serving the refreshments was a doddle as each of the four men jumped up to help whenever she approached the table with trays or cups. And the many admiring glances cast her way filled her with a confidence she never thought she’d be capable of. She heard Mr John getting his leg pulled a few times about being a dark horse, and where had he been hiding her all this time. But her boss had a ready answer to them. She was on his staff, and was a respectable married woman with two children.
‘It’s time you were on your way, Mrs Perkins.’ John took his fob-watch out of his waistcoat pocket and frowned. ‘It’s nearly half-past nine. Your family will be getting worried.’
‘Yes, I’ll be on my way if yer sure there’s nothing else you need.’
‘No, we’ll be getting down to some serious card-playing now and some heavy drinking.’ He rose from his chair. ‘I’ll see you out.’
‘Oh, yer’ve no need to, Mr John. I can let meself out.’
‘Mrs Perkins, you are the most obstinate woman I know. Now get your coat and I’ll see you to the front door.’
His three friends left their seats to shake Ada’s hand. ‘Thank you for looking after us, Mrs Perkins,’ said Jack Grimshaw, ‘and for adding a touch of glamour. Hopefully we’ll see you again.’
‘Hear, hear,’ chorused one of his colleagues, while the other said, ‘It’s been a delight to make your acquaintance.’
Ada smiled her thanks and left the room followed by John. They didn’t speak as they descended the two flights of stairs but when they reached the front door Ada said, ‘There was no need for yer to come down, Mr John. I could have banged the door behind me.’
‘I know, Ada, you’re a very capable woman. You were excellent tonight, did me proud, and I’m deeply grateful to you.’
When he made no move to open the front door, Ada reached for the handle. But she didn’t turn it. Instead she spun around and faced him. If she didn’t clear the air now she’d never be able to look him in the eyes again. ‘Mr John, about what happened tonight, I don’t know what came over me. I don’t want yer to think I’m in the habit of crying on the shoulders of strange men, or that I’m a cheap, flighty woman, ’cos I’m not.’
‘Ada!’ John placed a hand on her arm. ‘You did nothing wrong, it was me who should be apologising. But I’m not going to apologise for doing something that I enjoyed and seemed right at the time.’
‘It won’t happen again, Mr John, I promise yer.’
He took her hand and held it between his. ‘If Agnes was here she’d say, “That’s not a promise, it’s a bleedin’ threat!”.’
Despite her nerves and shyness, Ada smiled. ‘Oh, Mr John, can yer imagine what Agnes would have said if she’d seen us? We’d have both got our backsides slapped.’
‘I doubt it.’ There was a smile on John’s face but his words were deadly serious. ‘She’d probably have said there was no harm in two lonely people taking comfort from each other.’
Their eyes locked and what Ada saw in his caused her heart to miss a beat. ‘I’d better go, yer friends will wonder what’s goin’ on.’
‘Have you got the cakes for the children?’
Ada nodded. ‘Yes, thank you, Mr John, they’ll be over the moon with them. Now I’ll bid yer good night.’
‘Good night, Ada, and take care.’ He waited until she was opening the wrought-iron gate before saying, ‘Whenever you need a shoulder to cry on, Ada, mine is always here. Remember that.’
Polly’s eyes were heavy with sleep when Ada got home, but the sight of her mother, looking as she’d never seen her looking before, soon chased away the yawns. ‘Oh Mam, yer don’t half look pretty. I bet Mr John got a shock, seein’ yer all dolled up.’
‘I don’t know about him gettin’ a shock, but he said I looked nice. An’ yer should have heard Aggie, she said I looked bleedin’ lovely. How anyone can look lovely an’ be bleeding at the same time, only God and Aggie knows.’
‘And you do look lovely, Mam!’ Polly rested her elbows on the table. ‘Tell me all about it. What were Mr John’s friends like an’ what did they have to eat?’
‘Smoked salmon, would yer believe?’ And so Ada began her tale, only leaving out the part she was ashamed of. How she was going to face Mr John tomorrow she couldn’t imagine. He must have got the impression she was a right trollop. In fact, for all she knew he could be having a damn good laugh with his friends about her right this minute. But even as the thought crossed her mind, Ada knew she was doing the man a grave injustice. He’d only ever shown her respect and kindness, even to taking the blame for that moment of madness.
‘And have yer brought some cakes home, Mam?’
Ada’s eyes looked blank for a second. Her mind had been split in two, one part telling Polly all about the evening, the other concerned with her indiscretion. ‘Er, yes, they’re in the case. I put them in one of the boxes they came in, but they’ve been upside down in the case so they’re probably broken up by now.’
But apart from one or two small iced decorations being broken off, the cakes were almost perfect. Polly gazed at them in awe. They were the smallest cakes she’d ever seen – one mouthful and they’d be gone. But they were so dainty, all different shapes and iced in pretty pastel-coloured icing, she thought it would be a shame to eat them. ‘There’s eight there, Mam. Who are they for?’
‘Mr John gave me them for you an’ Joey, but I think we should share them between us, don’t you?’
‘Oh, yeah! You had to work for them, Mam, so yer should have the most.’ Polly was eyeing the pale lilac one which had a lump on the top and a small green leaf. But by rights her mam should have first pick. ‘You choose what you want.’
‘I thought if we had two each, I could give the other two to Dolly an’ Les. They’ve been very good to me, Polly, an’ it would be a small way of showin’ my appreciation.’
Polly clamped her lips tight, a thoughtful expression on her face. ‘I’ll just have one an’ give the other to Steve. He always shares with me.’
‘We can’t leave Clare out, that would look terrible.’ Ada began to laugh. ‘I suggest you an’ me have one now an’ put the box away. Joey can have two in the mornin’ an’ I’ll pass the other four over to me mate.’
‘Which one d’yer want, Mam? You have first pick.’
Ada saw her daughter’s eyes on the lilac cake. ‘I’ll have the yellow one.’
Polly let her breath out and reached over to the box. She held the small cake in the palm of her hand before taking a bite. Her face assumed a look of pure bliss. ‘Oh Mam, there’s marzipan on the top, an’ cream. Mmmm …’ She stopped chewing so she could savour the taste for as long as possible. ‘Mam, what did Aggie say yer looked like?’
‘Don’t yer ever repeat that, me girl, or I’ll box yer ears.’
‘I won’t, Mam, but what was it?’
‘Bleedin’ lovely.’
‘That’s just what this cake tastes like, only better.’
Lost in the luxury of her yellow iced fancy, Ada couldn’t disagree. Later, as she lay in bed, the tiredness she’d felt disappeared. She was going over the events that led to her ending up in Mr John’s arms. She could remember standing crying like a baby, then the next minute her head was resting on his chest. She hadn’t moved towards him, she’d been rooted to the spot. So it was Mr John who had brought about the embrace, not her.
Ada plumped her pillow and turned on her side. She’d be able to look him in the eye tomorrow because she’d done nothing wrong. Then a voice in her head said she could have stopped it, so why hadn’t she? Because it all happened so quickly, I didn’t have a chance, she answered angrily. Then the voice asked what would have happened if the front-door bell hadn’t sounded? The answer to this did
n’t come so quickly. She re-lived the moment of contentment she’d felt wrapped in his arms, the manly smell of him, and his concern and gentleness. All the things that had been missing from her life for so long. And no harm had been done, no one had been hurt. She was still a young, red-blooded woman; was it so wrong to enjoy the company and admiration of a man? She loved Tommy with all her heart, always would. But she couldn’t deny her needs.
‘In the name of God!’ Dolly Mitchell stared down at the cakes in the box. ‘One of them would fit in my feller’s eye! If that’s what the toffs eat then I’m glad I’m as common as muck. Give me a ha’penny cream bun to one of them any day.’ But for all her words, Dolly’s mouth was watering. ‘Still, seein’ as yer were good enough to think of us, I’ll have one.’
Ada laughed at the expression on her neighbour’s face when her teeth sank through the icing into the soft marzipan, then downwards through the cream and soft sponge. Three mouthfuls and the cake had been demolished. Licking her fingers, Dolly said, ‘I take me words back about the cream bun, girl. I always thought I was born to better things an’ now I’m sure. That cake was bloody lovely. Next time Mr Roscoe’s entertainin’ toffs, ask him if yer can bring an assistant. Tell him I won’t need paying as long as he supplies me with a load of cakes.’ She eyed the remaining fancies with a scheming glint in her eye. ‘My feller doesn’t know about them, so if I eat the one yer brought for him, he won’t know the difference. What the eye don’t see, the heart don’t grieve over.’
‘Don’t you dare!’ Ada cried, closing the lid of the box. ‘If I thought yer were mean enough to do that, I’d take them back home with me and bring them in tonight.’
‘Huh! Some mate you are, Ada Perkins.’ But Dolly cast aside her craving and after giving Ada a pretend look of outrage, picked up the box of tempting pastries and carried it through to the kitchen. ‘If yer don’t trust me, yer can check with Les when yer see him, just to make sure I haven’t diddled him.’
‘And I’ll check with Steve and Clare, too,’ Ada told her. ‘I’m not doin’ without meself just to feed your face.’
