His sudden near presence made Judith freeze, afraid of spilling the coffee since her hands trembled. She turned to him. “I made coffee.”
Sean kissed her, his lips against hers, the now familiar taste of him sending her entire body adrift. It was moments later when she realized much too late that they’d entered forbidden territory. The point where neither had the strength nor, more honestly, the willingness to move away from it. The need was too great and Judith could not help but delve into the depth of the emotions taking them downstream until they drowned in each other.
The feel of his bare skin against hers was amazing. Sean was everything that was perfect in a man. He ensured she was ready and took his time, patiently holding back, asking over and over again if she was sure. Of course she wasn’t. There was nothing about what happened that was familiar. Yet the one thing she knew for sure was that belonging to him in that moment, when their bodies joined, was exactly what she imagined when thinking about being made love to. It was beautiful and all consuming, a torrent that dragged her down until she didn’t care if she drowned in him.
His caresses and kisses made Judith cling to him, returning as much passion as she could, conveying to him with her touch how deeply she felt for him. Sean Montgomery became her husband that night. Yes, in two days they’d stand before God and witnesses and proclaim vows, but there in the bedroom, filled with breathless whispers and the sounds of flesh touching flesh, was when she became not just his wife, but a woman in every sense of the word.
“I can’t imagine anything more beautiful than you right now,” Sean said, looking at her, his face close to hers on the pillow as they lay facing one another. “I am a very lucky man.”
Judith smiled. She couldn’t be ashamed. She should have felt a bit of remorse, but all she could feel in that moment was fulfillment. “Hold me, Sean. I find it hard to be even this far away from you.”
When he pulled her close, she snuggled against him. “Must you go? I want you to stay with me.”
The deep rumble in her ear from his chuckle made her giddy. He let out a long sigh. “I wish that more than anything but, as you know, I’m staying with Pat…he’s probably already wondering why I’m not there.”
“Pat? Oh, you mean Father O’Reilly. Oh, God!” Judith pushed away from Sean and sat straight up. Grabbing the blankets to cover herself, she waved her hands wildly. “For goodness sakes, what are you waiting for? Get dressed. You must hurry. He’ll know something if you don’t get there now.”
Sean put both hands behind his head and grinned at her. “Will you always be this bossy of a wife?”
“It’s not funny.” Judith shoved at him until he almost fell off the bed. Finally, he got up and her eyes widened at seeing him fully nude. “Oh.”
He dressed in a hurry as she watched, unable to look away from his body. When he looked over his shoulder at her as he adjusted his belt, Judith blushed. “Sorry. I don’t mean to stare, but you are the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.”
“Hopefully, I’m the only man you’ve ever seen nude,” he told her with a wink.
“You know what I mean. You are correct in that you are the only man I’ve ever seen bereft of clothing, but even your face. You are most handsome.”
He leaned over the bed and kissed her lightly on the lips. “I’m glad you think so.”
“Go!” Judith pushed him away when he leaned in to kiss her again. “Please don’t let Father O’Reilly think we’ve…”
“That we’ve made love?” Sean winked again and finally left.
Judith fell back onto the bed, unsure how she felt at what had happened. Now, as she faced the reality of her actions, she covered her face with both hands. “Oh Lord, please don’t think badly of me. He’s going to be my husband, after all. And well…please forgive me. I am so happy. Thank you for gifting me with such a wonderful husband and beautiful child. I will do my best by them.”
Chapter Seven
“It’s our wedding day. I’m going to be your mother,” Judith told the baby who looked up at her with sleepy eyes. “I can’t wait to give you a brother or sister. You will be a wonderful big sister, my beautiful Bethany.” She kissed the child’s brow, loving the smell of her.
Just after she put the baby in the crib for a nap, Eloise burst in with her youngest one perched on her hip. “Are you as excited as I am? I can’t stand still. Woke up at dawn and made sure nothing was amiss.” Her shining eyes scanned over Judith. “What about you? What are you doing?”
“I just put Bethany down for her morning nap. I’m about to have a cup of tea. The wedding is not for another three hours. Relax, we have plenty of time. There’s not much to be done, is there?”
Eloise frowned. “I suppose not. How can you be so calm?”
“My stomach is in knots. I can’t eat. I’m too nervous,” Judith admitted, patting her stomach. “I can’t believe the day is finally here.”
“Then tea is a good idea. I’ll nip some spearmint from outside. We’ll put it in our tea and it will help settle your stomach some.” Seeming relieved to have a task, Eloise plopped her son on the floor, shoved a toy into his chubby hands and dashed out the back door to where the garden was. Judith let out a sigh and looked out the window toward where the blacksmith shop stood. From the house, she could make out Sean talking to a man. He wore the usual long apron, his shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows. Something the man said amused him because he threw his head back and laughed. Judith smiled at the sight of her handsome, soon to be husband being in good spirits.
The sun gleamed brightly. The day was perfect for a wedding. She’d bathed and pinned up her hair, waiting for it to dry naturally before loosening it for the wedding. Her dress was pressed and hung from the back of the door. She didn’t want to take a chance Sean would come and see it. Although he’d been warned to stay away, one couldn’t be too careful.
“There we are,” Eloise said returning with a handful of sprigs of spearmint. “It’s growing so big. I brought enough for an entire pot of it. I’m suddenly craving it.”
They sat at the table minutes later with two large mugs of tea. Judith smiled. “I have to admit the tea and biscuit helped. I’m sure it’s nerves, so I’m not too worried about it.”
“It’s understandable. Today is your wedding day. Every bride is nervous.”
“Why didn’t Sean marry Bethany’s mother?” Judith wasn’t sure why she asked. Perhaps it was a question she should have posed to Sean.
Eloise shrugged. “From what he told me, they met when he went to Casper to help with some horses for the cavalry. She was one of those women, you know.”
“Oh no, I don’t know anything about her.”
“The kind that sells their favors, I think. Please don’t think ill of my brother. He was a single man, after all.” Eloise hesitated. “Anyway, next thing we know, an older woman claiming to be the woman’s mother came and dropped off Bethany to Sean. According to the woman, Bethany’s mother, Angela was her name, had died during childbirth.”
“How sad for her,” Judith said and let out a sigh. “I’m thankful they didn’t just abandon her.”
Eloise frowned. “I prayed Bethany was, indeed, Sean’s daughter. I mean, after all the woman was not the respectable kind. But Bethany looks so much like him, there is no doubt in my mind.”
“Mine either,” Judith replied. “I love her.”
Eloise pressed her lips together with a mischievous expression. “What about Sean? How do you feel about him? Anything yet?”
“I do feel deeply for him. My heart flutters when I see him. I can’t stop thinking about him and oh my goodness, I sound like a schoolgirl.” Judith covered her cheeks with her hands. “I think I love him.”
“That makes me so happy, so very happy for you both. I suspect Sean feels the same.”
Both jumped at the knock on the door and Eloise rushed to the window and peered out. “It’s Sean. Hide.” She made shooing motions with both hands. “The rascal is trying to be
sneaky.”
“You know very well it’s bad luck to see the bride before the wedding,” Eloise blocked his entrance into the house and Sean couldn’t help being annoyed. He’d hoped to come and steal a few kisses from his intended before the wedding and now his nosy sister kept him from seeing her.
“Where’s Judith?” He looked over her shoulder to the empty space. “Did she go somewhere?”
Eloise pushed her finger into his chest. “She’s hiding. Now, get going. Go get something to eat at my house.”
“What about Bethany?” Once again, he attempted to step inside. “Where’s she at?”
“Asleep. Sean Montgomery, don’t you make me kick you in the leg. Go on now.” This time she used both hands and shoved him back onto the porch. Eloise walked out with him and closed the door behind her. Her eyes twinkled with mirth. “I know you’re anxious to see her. Once the marriage ceremony is complete, you’ll have your wife all to yourself. From this day forward.”
Sean let out a breath and raked his fingers through his hair. “I suppose. Don’t know why I have such an uneasy feeling. She’s not going change her mind is she?”
“No, darling, she’s not. If anything, she’s as impatient as you are. Relax. Why don’t you go on, eat, take a bath and get dressed. We’ll see you at the chapel.”
“All right. You’re right, of course. It’s just I’d feel better if I saw her.”
“No.” Eloise placed her fisted hands on both hips. “It’s bad luck.”
“Fine.” He gave the front door one last, long look and went to see about bathing. He was much too nervous to eat anything.
* * *
The dress fit perfectly. The round neckline was a bit lower than Judith was used to, especially for going to church, but Eloise and Lorna insisted it was the style. She had to admit the pale, butter yellow fabric with tiny roses was beautiful. The full skirting felt luxurious.
The women fussed with her hair, pulling the curls back and up and then dressing the crown with a small bundle of white, dried flowers.
As she watched in the mirror, she met her soon to be sister-in-law’s gaze. “I don’t recognize myself. You are wonderful with hair.” Judith reached to touch the flowers only to have her hand slapped away.
Lorna peered out the window. “Martin is here with the buggy.”
Once again, her stomach tumbled, butterflies fluttering in her chest.
“We have half an hour. Let’s sit for a minute and relax,” Eloise proclaimed. Without waiting for a reply, she poured fresh tea into three cups. “Judith, do you have any questions about what happens between a man and a woman?”
“I don’t…I mean…I think I know.” Judith wanted to laugh, but instead she looked down at the cup clutched in her hands and pressed her lips together to keep from smiling.
The fast knocking at the door took their attention. Eloise jumped to her feet. “Stay there! I’ll see who it is.”
Albert, Eloise’s eldest boy, rushed in, his eyes darted to Judith before looking up to his mother. Face flushed, he bent over attempting to catch his breath.
“Boy, what is wrong with you? Somebody chasing after you for something?” Eloise moved past the boy and looked outside.
“No,” finally Albert spoke albeit breathlessly. Once again he looked to Judith and gulped. “Mama, I have to tell you something.” He tugged at Eloise’s hand. “Uncle Sean told me to tell you in private.”
Eloise gave Judith a quick smile and allowed her son to pull her outside.
At the soft closing of the door, Judith’s heart began to pound. Whatever could be happening? Could it be there was a delay or emergency of some sort? She clasped her hands around the cup of tea so hard, she feared it would shatter. When the hot liquid spilled over onto the back of her hand, she put the cup down and leaned back on the chair. What could they possibly be talking about for so long? If Eloise didn’t return soon, she was going to the door.
The clock chimed. It was time to head to the chapel. The buggy was outside. Perhaps she’d just get going. This was one thing she’d not be late for. A smile tugged at her lips in spite of the nervousness at remembering the night she’d been with Sean. After today, they’d start their life together and have many more just like it.
The buggy left and Judith rushed to the window just as Eloise walked back in, her face devoid of color. Judith couldn’t move. Something terrible happened and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to know what it was.
“Sean just cancelled the wedding. He can’t marry you today.”
Chapter Eight
Sean paced the front room in Father Patrick O’Reilly’s house. Angela Parks, the woman he’d been told was dead, sat in a chair with an expectant expression. The priest sat across from her, his eyes following Sean.
“A decision must be made, of course,” Patrick said to no one in particular. “I do believe it’s best to take some time and think things through.” He looked pointedly at Angela. “You can’t expect Sean to marry you this instant.”
“Of course I can. Our child should have proper parents. It’s not my fault I was so ill after having her. My mother took it upon herself to bring Bethany here.”
There were too many things whirling in his mind to think straight. Sean went to the doorway and looked out. Taking deep breaths did not relieve the tightness in his chest. How could this be? If Angela had arrived just another day later, he’d be married to Judith and there would be nothing Angela could do. Yes, actually, there was. The woman could take his daughter.
He turned and studied Angela, who’d grown thinner and gaunt since he’d last seen her. The yellowish tone to her skin was troubling. He wondered what illness she had. If the woman followed through on her threats, there was nothing he could do. One thing was for certain. He’d never allow her to take his daughter. “I love Bethany. I’ve raised her. You can’t expect me to give her up.”
“I expect you to be responsible and marry me. We have a child together.” Angela gave the priest a triumphant look. “Isn’t that right, Father?”
Patrick looked to Sean. It was obvious by the flatness in his gaze, he, too, did not like the idea of Sean marrying the woman, who’d obviously fallen on hard times and was desperate for someone to support her.
The priest nodded. “I think it’s proper for Bethany to have parents. Sean and his intended will provide your child with a good upbringing.”
“No.” Angela jumped to her feet, clenching her hands. “I will not let another woman raise my baby.” She whirled toward Sean. “Where is my child? I want to see her now.”
“Not until you calm down and we decide what is best.” Sean refused to give in to the woman’s demands. It would be a cold day in hell before he tied himself to the woman for life. Angela would not stay, not for long. Already, he saw the disdain she held when looking about Patrick’s house. She wanted a place for a time, to recover, then she’d leave and Bethany would lose her mother all over again. If she was so ill it could cost her life, then the outcome could be the same.
His daughter without a mother and he raising her alone.
Sean moved to stand closer to Angela, but the priest intercepted. “There has to be a compromise we can come to. Why don’t you live here in town? You can visit Bethany as much as you want.”
Sean never loved his friend more than at that moment. Although, for religious purposes, it would be best for him to marry Angela, Patrick still fought for an alternative. Obviously, the priest could see beyond Angela’s threats.
“And how will I support myself? I don’t have any skills. Besides, I came here to see my child, to raise her proper with a mother.”
Sean met her gaze. “A mother who loves her? You know what I think? I think you’re down on your luck and are looking for a temporary place. I think once you get better, you’ll leave and I’ll be left with a brokenhearted child.”
* * *
Judith opened her eyes and peered up at Eloise’s pale face. “What happened?”
“You faint
ed. Haven’t eaten since yesterday I assume, so of course with the shock…” Eloise didn’t finish talking and wiped a tear from her face. “I can’t believe this.”
“Why?” Judith didn’t want to finish the sentence. It was not important, really, why Sean changed his mind about marrying her. He must have come to some sort of realization. God, what was she going to do now?
“Bethany’s mother. She’s alive and at Patrick’s house right now.” Eloise shook her head. “Albert said she looks bad. Is sick or something.”
Judith shook her head. “That’s impossible. She’s dead.”
“So everyone thought. I suppose it was a lie. Must have sent Bethany away for some reason.”
“Oh my God,” Judith said, unable to wrap her mind around everything that happened. “How can it be?”
“I know.” Eloise took her hand. “Albert said Sean will be by later to speak to you. I am not sure what to do. I have to see about what to do with all the food. I sent a message to Lorna who will be letting the few people who were attending know the wedding has been put off.”
“I can’t stay here.” Judith got to her feet and swayed. “I’ll get my things.”
Just then, a little foot stuck up from the crib and Bethany cooed. Judith went to peer down at the child who looked to her and a smile formed on the baby’s lips. Recognition.
Judith crumpled to the floor unable to keep back the sobs. “I can’t…lose her.”
Anger and fear collided inside her. “Why now? Today of all days.” Her entire body shook with each sob until she could only remain on the floor. Eloise’s arms surrounded her, but the comfort was not enough to keep the pain at bay.
After a couple of knocks, the door opened and Lorna came to them. She, too, kneeled next to Judith and pulled her into her arms. “There, there. It will all be fixed. You just wait and see. Sean is beside himself with worry about you. He told me to tell you to please stay here and wait for him. He and Father O’Reilly are trying to talk sense into that woman.”
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