by Dervan Brown
“He died just as I extended twelve years. I arrived at the hospital shortly before he died. He looked into my eyes and placed his palm on my cheek and said.”
‘Happy birthday Karla. I love you. All I have is yours”
The sad reminiscence caressed her face and the dead memories had resurfaced and rendered her restless and susceptible. He felt a throb in his heart that was commanding him to embrace her. To tell her that comfort is once again here after so many years of grief and pain, and that he wasn’t here to take his place but he would wrap his wings around her and care for her like a father, a brother, a cousin and a lover if she wanted him to.
However, impulse wasn’t enough to make him lean over and hold her hand. He was more so afraid he would embrace her for the wrong reasons that would result in a rush of blood to his dick, stimulated from just the scent of her perfume.
“I remember when I was younger. Whenever evening came, I would wait by the road to see him coming in the distance from work. As he turned the corner, he would always shout,
“Karla, where are you!!”
“In sudden fright, from the excitement of hearing his voice, I would drop my dolls and run to greet him with open arms. Shouting, ‘Daddy Daddy Daddy!!!’ He would lift me above his head so I could touch the sky and wave at the wind as he spun me around and melted me down to the embrace of his warm hugs and kisses to my forehead. That alone was worth much more than the lollipop candies he would exchange with me for smiles he called butterflies.”
She tried to hold back the tears but couldn’t. She tried to stop talking but that wouldn’t help.
“Sometimes I beat at his chest and scream hate at him for not being here for me, especially when I need him the most.” She subtly uttered as the tears flow.
“I have suffered so much already.” She sobbed, “How am I supposed to love? How am I supposed to know happiness for Christ sake! How am I to make it in this life, if the one that was supposed be here to hold my hand and teach me how to, is right here lying in this grave? He never talks to me whenever I ask for answers! The rush of warm air and subtle chills is just not enough sometimes. They are just mere reassurances that he is there and not here.
The clouds turned grey. Suddenly it began to rain. The oversaturation of pain and fossils of grief was again too overwhelming to bottle. As the rain came down heavier, she anticipated a shoulder from his temple, but upon realizing that the doors wouldn’t open for her to find comfort inside, she walked slowly back to the store, shivering under the wet and cold garments.
John remained seated on the grave. The isolation got stiff and suddenly he felt like he was in a cemetery. A wind of indifference filled the atmosphere and gripped his lungs inducing a pain sticking palpitation in his chest. Maybe it was a warning not to get close to his cousin by any means. But how could he possibly heed such a warning, when he was already trapped and enchanted by her beauty?
She was indeed splendid. You could see the city of Paris in her eyes. If you touched her lips it would drag your thoughts to the cherry blossoms found in the Washington garden. She wore her hair short and relaxed. For most men that would be an imperfection, but in his eyes it resonated her majestic beauty and orchestrated a symphony of her phenomenal exquisiteness. The rest of her body was a seductive hypnosis.
Chapter 3
The sun peaked and enchanted the land with its midday rays. The morning had promised showers but that was a mere deception to John. He had woke up at eight and attempted to walk to Mahogany Hall. The sun had given its reassurance and so he made haste to reach the promise land while the day remained dry.
His mother had inquired about the reasons of wanting to visit there. As she found it peculiar that he wanted to make a second visit, in less than forty eight hours, to a place she was almost certain only degenerates and the likes of them lived. It wasn’t a usual thing to do, but he had lied to his mother that he was going to see his cousin, Andrew Steelburg in order to obtain music for his personal computer. The truth had acidified his stomach which left a wrong uncomfortable sensation throughout his body. Nevertheless he continued to tread his journey. Somehow he knew he was headed in the right direction.
As he walked at a modest pace downhill, he would break the veins of the ferns and pick the leaves one by one. As he gazed out, his thoughts chattered away.
“You like her, don’t you?” He asked.
“Yeah, she is cute.” He tersely added.
“She is so much more than cute and you know it.” He asserted.
He took a sip of the ginger tea and met his eyes steadily.
“You are right.” He replied and turned his gaze at the black two thousand and four C class Mercedes Benz that approached the sidewalk of the coffee shop for a drop-off.
The driver of the car was Andrew Steelburg, Karla Steelburg’s brother. The color of his unbutton tuxedo matched that of the C Class. It appeared he was on duty.
He maneuvered out of the driver seat, and then made a slow three sixty degrees turn to ascertain that it was safe. He quickly made his way to the back door adjacent to the sidewalk and held it for whosoever deserved such prestigious gesture.
To their audacious surprise, it was Karla that was in the back seat of the C Class. She held on to the chauffeur’s hand and braced to a stand. Her sophistication had earned her a congenial distinction in society. She fashioned a red ballroom dress that had thin straps padding her shoulders which traveled the distance from just about where her inter vertebral disk was located to the circumference of where her breasts began. The red carnation threaded from polyester emphasized her slender curves, and screamed the words, “sexily exotic!!” as it gently caressed her toes and poised a tease as the wind slowly frilled the frontal split that tapered to the peak above her knees.
She stepped on to the sidewalk about eight inches from the table from which they sat.
Karla Steelburg wasn’t aware that they were devouring every bit of her sweet serenity, or did she? The remaining ginger tea in the flowered enamel pot had instantly gotten cold. It was the only physical proof that a spontaneous reaction had not occurred. There was a distinct thermodynamic shift in the equilibrium of the isolated environment which had been induced by her presence. It’s as if nature, heat, light and everything else in the universe gravitated to her beauty in asserted hope of attaining stability and a simple state of tranquility. Yes! It is her that makes the world goes around. She raised her head to the heavens and gave an exotic smile, as she slightly sniffed the petals of the rose which complimented her sophisticated attire, then made her way down the catwalk to the neighboring laundry cleaners.
“…She is indeed exquisite.” He uttered under a compelling tone which was enough to melt the ice.
Their focus shifted to the man that stood outside of the cleaners, her bodyguard or maybe a protective guardian that got paid to hover her three sixty five days per year.
Andrew Steelburg gave notice to the no smoking sign on the window of the store, and in blatant disregard he pulled out a cancer stick from the pack he had, fumed the chimney and polluted the air. He had a prominent bone structure that carried less flesh than needed and he had a dark-brown complexion that was slightly brighter than his eyes. He constantly carried a fierce and serious look on his face that could be replaced for a ‘Beware of the Pit-bulls’ sign. He was never one to smile, but whenever he did it was in the face of adversity. As the stories would have it, prison for him wasn’t a devastating social reform experience. Rather, it was one that allowed him to embrace his turbulence.
She came out of the store with a dress that only synchronizes with midnight. One would quickly presume that the dress was for a funeral, but that would run contrary to her enthused smile and flirtatious dispositions. She handed the dress to the chauffeur, and made her way back to the sidewalk, and waited for him to open the door. As she maneuvered into the car, the rose fell from her glove and the petals scattered as it collided with the ground. You could almost hear the screams as the B
enz intensified the sorrows and abandoned her to whiter in tears.
John Steelburg arrived at the house and made his way to the store where he found Karla and Andrew indulging in a rather petty conversation. John caught her stare but had to quickly turn his attention to the male in an attempt to shade the chemistry that was brewing into a scandal.
“So what brought you here, Cuz? It’s strange how I see you here twice within forty-eight hours” Andrew alluded to the peculiarity of him showing up at the store without invitation.
“I was pretty much bored at the house. So I decided to take a walk down here to see if you wanted to chill over music and of course something cooked.”
“Well that sounds like a plan.” Andrew added,” I will be the disk jockey, while you tend the duties of a master chef.”
“Sounds good to me.” John confirmed.
“I will assist you in the kitchen if you don’t mind.” Karla added.
“No problem with me. Just lead the way.”
They prepared the luncheon in the little box of what was supposed to be an ample spaced kitchen. Or maybe it was a figment of their imagination that the walls had closed in, which afforded them little space to maneuver without their skin touching, thereby sending impulsive sensation to the feeble organs in their chests and emotive sexually objective yin-yangs between their legs.
“I know you like me.” John uttered as he chopped the carrots. He braced for a favorable response.
“We are cousins, remember?” She asked without looking in his direction.
“It doesn’t feel that way to me.” John alerted.
“Yes! But the fact still remains.” She stretched by him to pick up the table cloth.
That was the closest he had gotten to her, and he had to summon the gods from Mars to bestow onto him manly composure. If it was only up to the goddesses from Venus he would drop his sword and fling his armor aside in plight to surrender to her mighty weapon of beauty enchanted by the sweet devilish seductive aroma that lingered around every inch of her temple.
“Look into my eyes and tell me you do not know of this pain that I am feeling!” He commanded.
Her fingers came to a sudden pause, but her eyes remained steady on the knife and the diced onions. She didn’t look and she gave no answer. The silence perpetuated and intensified the atmosphere.
John gently touched the neck of her temple and a sudden pant of breath gasped through her lips. He slowly slid the back of his pointer finger down to her shoulder. Being cognizant of the tremors that were erupting inside of her, he audaciously continued down her arm to the carpal of her index finger, and then laid his hand on top of her hand. At that instance the walls had confined the two to just the spaces between them. No longer could the intensity hold. The cup runneth over and she subdued as he turned her face to greet his warm kiss, delivered by his God given strawberry flavored lips.
A decade had already passed and it didn’t seem eternity was time enough to part their lips. The simple physics of when steel meets magnet was a tenth of a billionth of the isolated phenomenon that was being orchestrated within those four walls. There was not a single or collective external force in the universe that could have overcome the inertia of what they just created. The affection steamed from within their hearts and one could only quench it from the deepening roots.
They finally braced apart, still in arms. They searched each other’s eyes as they fought to come to terms with what in heaven just took place. They eased out of arms and held hands as realization crept in.
“Hello.” John uttered with a pleasant smile.
“Your lips are so soft.” She touched his bottom lip.
He reached for air and managed, “Yours are to die for.”
She blushed at his charm which followed a deep sigh carrying a slight bitter disapproval. As much as she wanted to relive eternity, she couldn’t, at least not in this time or dimension.
“You have to go!” Karla demanded.
“But, but…why? I don’t understand.”
“Listen to me, you have to go, but call me.” She scribbled her number on a piece of paper and hurried him out, “Call me, but you have to leave now!”
He hurriedly went to the exit door of the living room, and as he turned the knob of the door he felt it pushed open. To his surprise, it was Andrew making his way in. His heart drummed. He swallowed whatever saliva he had in his throat and tried to maintain his composure as adrenaline made a bid to alert the rest of his body for flight more so than fight. However to his fortune, Andrew had not a clue of what had occurred.
“Where are you going John? I know you’re not done preparing the meal as yet.”
“I know, I got a phone call and I have to leave right now.” John lied, “Sorry Cuz, we will do this some other time, duty calls.”
He hurried down the stairs and left without looking back. Well who would want to turn around into their newly greatest fear?
Chapter 4
The rocks on the patio at the peak of the valley made a comfortable bedding to absorb the incandescence of the sunset. However, John Steelburg was rather fixated in the reminiscence of yesterday, so he paid little notice to the scattering of white light in the heavens which created a mystic ambiance in the colloids of the sky.
He was at first hesitant to dial her number.
“Is there any crime against calling ones cousin?” He wondered and summoned the courage to call her.
The phone rang three times. He hung up before it got to the fourth ring. Half of an hour had past and it had gotten too overwhelming to not call again. This time it was a breath of fresh air to hear her soft tone voice say,
“Hello.”
“Hello?” John signaled.
“I am here.”
“So…what’s up?” He asked.
“Nothing much…just here thinking…what’s up with you Cuz?”
“Nothing really… The sun didn’t set today.”
“Yes it did.” She affirmed, “You just didn’t see it.”
“Yeah, technically you're right. I guess I was too deep in thoughts to even notice.”
“What have you been thinking about?” She inquired.
“I was caught up in the twist of what happened today, the condescension and all the drama that encompasses.
“I know it’s so wrong and we are way over our heads here, but…” She sighed, “What I wouldn’t do to kiss you once more.”
“I didn’t say this is wrong. It’s just that in the world we live in, it’s not openly acceptable.” He continued in a lighter tone, “They would stone you to death and castrate my little john.”
She blurted out a little laugh that soothed the air.
“I certainly wouldn’t want them to castrate your john, John.” She teased.
“Hmmm. I see you have a newly found friend and family. How did you like his touch and squeeze against your body?”
“I liked the bigger John better. The bigger John was a gentleman who kissed well. It’s hard to find a real gentleman that kisses like a prince these days.”
“Trust me, I know John better than you do and he is the chivalrous knight that stands hard and ready for his queens commandments.”
“Are you saying that John already has a queen that he is eternally faithful to?”
“No, the John that held and embraced you today with the due passion of a man that crawls on bending knees to the oasis in the forsaken desert to feel a drip of water touch his tongue to quench the thirst of a thousand horses does not behold a queen in his kingdom at this moment in time.”
“Aww wow! I am utterly lost for words. You are so charming! It’s shivery. My palms, sweaty…
“So are you seeing anyone?” John asked.
After a brief silence she replied.
“…Yes, I am actually involved with this guy by the name of Joseph Gibson. I call him Joe.”
The water erased his footprints in the sand. He shivered as it touched his toes. The sea carried with it a cold wave of disappo
intment and heartless repudiation. He took a few steps back from the shore. After all the water suddenly didn’t seem as welcoming, and even though there was usually hope beyond the horizon, it was no ordinary love song of when a man searched the seven oceans to finally find compatibility in the depths of despair and hopelessness. This was a total head on collision of the earth, moon and stars at the speed of light, at a factor of a billionth of a point one probability that a particle would emerge and give credence to support the theory that such a love is real. That such a love could stand the test of time, redefine morals and instill hope and confidence into those who were shunned for knowing unconditional love.
With closed eyes and adrenaline flight he spurred ahead and dived in like there was no return to the cold and lonely shores.
“So why?” He asked in disbelief, “I don’t understand….”
“I am sorry, John. I was going to tell you at first, I mean we were just cousins. Then you kissed me and said hello, which changed everything. I didn’t want to push you away. I am sorry.”
“Wow!! Where are we going with this? I mean, it’s obvious there is no force, no power, not even a single element in the universe that desires for us to be together. So tell me what are we doing here Karla?”
“I don’t know!” Came out intensely, “But what I do know is, I have never felt this way about anyone before. Not my ex, not the guy I’m with right now, neither my so called first love, nor anyone else in my family before. This experience is totally new for me. I hate to say it, but it feels so damn good!” She asserted with a breath of relief.
“Don’t get me wrong cousin, I do…I do have passionate feelings for you. Hold on, let me rephrase that. I am attracted to you, not scarcely, not modestly but a whole fucking lot!” Jennifer Williams’s youngest child swore unequivocally.
She twirled her hair and rolled her eyes. All this time she just could not cease to blush.
“You made me smile.” That’s all she said.
“Karla. This is all so intense and I don’t mean to rain on your parade, but I still do not see a way how this is going to work for us babe. I mean, apart from the fact that we are cousins, you have a boyfriend. I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but I am not the type to get caught up in another man’s affair.”
