I pulled her close and held her, feeling her tears against my shirt as she gave in to the heavy emotions. It wasn’t that I was heartless, but I knew she needed me to be strong in that moment.
“I know it’s hard to believe, Jessica, but I promise you that if anyone can come back from all of this and find a way to enjoy life, it’s you. You and Kat are the strongest people I’ve ever met, and I mean that, so please don’t give up hope.” She withdrew from me and wiped her eyes, drying her nose on a rag from her pocket. “Today sucked, I can’t deny that, but there’s always tomorrow.”
“Thank you,” she finally said after pulling herself together. “Eric?” She frowned and stopped me as I started to walk outside. “What if tomorrow sucks, too?” I knew where she was coming from, because for the longest time I had been exactly where she was. Remembering what changed it all, I put my hands on her arms and stared into her eyes.
“As long as you’re with me, I don’t think there’s a way that could possibly happen.” I don’t know where the hell that came from, but with that I walked out to the SUV and prepared to leave this town in the dust.
Chapter 17
We decided to take Hannah, the woman we had rescued in Arizona, back to San Antonio with us. The plan had been to return to Murray with a report on the town as a prospective outpost, but that route brought us close enough to Texas to deviate. A promise was a promise after all, and, if I’m honest with myself, it would be nice to see Kat and the kid again after everything that had happened.
Jessica drove while Hannah slept in the back seat, finally dozing off after sleepless days full of fear and suffering. I knew she would have nightmares for years to come, but hopefully she would find a reason to smile again someday, something I wished for all of us.
“Are you excited?” Jessica raised an eyebrow, knowing the truth, but I wasn’t about to play along.
“To get Hannah somewhere safe? Absolutely.” This brought on a frown, but she let it go. We devolved into our small talk again, discussing possible locations for outposts, what we would tell Murray when we made our report, basically just passing the time with verbal paperwork to avoid any real topics. Still, underneath it all there was something else, something nice and comforting.
Eventually, Hannah woke up and listened to us, her eyes still full of sorrow and anger. When she finally worked up the strength to join our conversation, she had a lot of questions, starting with who we were and what we were doing all the way out in the middle of Small Town, Arizona.
I took the lead on that answer, giving the greatest hits of the first journal, beginning at the compound and leading all the way up to our decision to leave San Antonio. Telling the story, it sounded so surreal and bordered on too ridiculous to be true at times, but I found myself deep in thought by the end.
“I hope you find what you’re looking for out here,” she quietly said, “both of you. What you’re doing…you’re helping people.” Hanna’s eyes welled, bringing her arm up to hide her sadness. When she calmed down, she lowered her arm and stared at her bandaged hand. She was missing fingers, but the ring on her third finger remained, a small victory in the face of defeat. “I’m glad you killed them, but I hate that I’m glad.”
“I’m sorry, Hannah.” I wanted to say I wished we had gotten there sooner, but that would only make me feel better, not her. “There’s nothing wrong with feeling grief, and everyone deals with it differently. Hating the things that did that is okay, as long as you don’t let the hatred consume you.”
“I don’t know what else to feel. It’s all I have left after losing Mike.” Her eyes reddened, but she was out of tears, so she began to dry heave. Jessica pulled to the side and I took over at the wheel, letting her go in the back with Hannah to comfort her. Having been on the road for several hours by that point, it was only another five hours before we entered the city of San Antonio.
Pulling up to the outpost, Jessica and I were greeted with the same treatment as the last time until they saw who we were. After being waved inside, I pulled the SUV around and we got out to be checked for infection. Jessica stepped back outside with Hannah, who was clearly not handling things well.
“It’ll be okay,” she said softly, taking Hannah’s hand. “I’ll be with you the whole time.” Medical personnel held the flaps open for them to enter the quarantine tent, a sanitizing chamber that led into a small room for the doctor to perform the examination. Hannah had a hesitation to her gait, but Jessica stayed close and helped to guide her inside. As soon as they entered, the technicians dropped the flaps and disappeared inside.
Minutes later, Jessica and Hannah stepped out, a slight look of relief on Hannah’s face. I guess with everything the ferals had done, she might have thought she was infected, something I should have figured out given the days following the farmhouse with Kat those many months ago. I smiled at Jessica, not waiting to go inside. Maybe I was a little excited to see Katherine after eight months.
I was already stripping down when I entered the exam room, a small enclosure with a steel table in the center and several medical instruments scattered over a tray nearby. The doctor welcomed me inside, noting my haste.
“I guess I don’t have to ask you to disrobe?” The older man sat in a chair and set a clipboard in his lap.
“Sorry,” I laughed, “I’ve done this before.”
“No problem.” He clicked his pen and did a double-take as I removed my shirt, his eyes seeing numerous scars before focusing on the one left by the gunshot. “Have you had any contact with the infection or infected persons?” I laughed again.
“That would be an understatement, but this” I pointed to the scar, “was from a normal guy with a twitchy trigger-finger. We had a slight disagreement.”
“I would say so.” He checked something on his clipboard. “As far as the encounters, have you ever had an open wound near infected blood?” I knew exactly where this was going.
“I’ll save both of us a lot of time and cut the crap. I’ve been out there hunting down pockets of zombies and ferals for the last eight months. Before that, I was on my own or with a few people and, yeah, I had a lot of close calls. I’ve been shot, cut, and I’ve had the shit beaten out of me more times than I’d care to admit, but I’m not infected.” He nodded, checking several boxes on the clipboard.
“I see. Still, you understand we have to do a blood test to be safe.” I finished undressing, did a turn, and waited for him to tell me I could put my clothes back on.
“Let’s do it,” I grinned, plopping my arm on the table and letting him take a sample. He let out a few drops on a microscope slide and looked it over.
“Well, it looks like you’re good to go.” He leaned up, removing his gloves. “If I may, sir, it sounds like you’re a lucky man. You might want to think about sticking around here, even just to relax your mind. Psychological damage is very real.”
“I’ll get right on that, Doc.” I walked back through the sanitizing rinse, buttoning my shirt as I stepped into the sunlight.
“All clear?” Jessica was waiting to the side with Hannah. Mills looked a little worried, but I nodded and grinned.
“Thanks for the concern.” She rolled her eyes and started walking, showing Hannah around the city. I stopped off at the command center, set inside the Alamo, to submit my report on Arizona. Colonel Harper was there with Lieutenant Murphy and we exchanged greetings.
“How the hell are you, son?” Harper asked, his drawl as thick as the cigar in his mouth.
“Oh, you know, keeping busy.”
“So we’ve heard,” Murphy interjected, nodding past me. “Word of your antics at the Mississippi HQ spread fast, a real morale boost.”
“I was just glad to get there when we did. Any later and we might have been too late.” I had always hated complements or accolades, especially for something that anyone would have done.
“Well, just know that we’re all pulling for you out there.” I nodded my thanks and waited for Harper to ask about A
rizona.
“The town we stopped in was overtaken by ferals, survivors that had resorted to other means. We did rescue one, a woman, but she’s in bad shape mentally.” I lowered my voice so only they heard me. “The ferals tortured, dismembered, and likely cannibalized her husband while she watched.” Harper took a long puff on his cigar, nodding slowly.
“We’ll make sure she’s taken care of. You have my word.”
“Thanks, Colonel. I actually have an idea there.” I paused, going back to the report. “We removed the threat, though, and as long as you can establish a stable supply route along with protection, the area would be good for an outpost. It seemed like they had gone feral recently, so I’m sure there are still survivors in the surrounding area.”
We spent the next few minutes mapping out potential routes and planning for the future, but eventually I left the HQ and joined back up with Jessica. As we walked, we noticed the construction that Harper had been up to, adding sections of the city as they continued to clear it out. On top of the park, hotels, and library that we knew about, a section of restaurants had been opened up.
Stopping in front of the hotel, Jessica looked over at me and smiled. She was clearly excited, too, so we walked into the lobby together, keeping Hannah close. After asking the soldier guarding the entrance, we knocked on the door to room 217. Footsteps grew closer on the other side before the door opened to reveal Matthew holding the door. I tried my best not to frown, but realization followed shortly after confusion and I stared at him, going full “Papa Bear.”
“Eric?”
Chapter 18
“Kid. Where’s Kat?”
“She’s, uh, in the kitchen, making lunch.”
“Alright.” Jessica cleared her throat and stepped forward, pushing past me.
“Since he’s not going to do it, hi, Matt. It’s good to see you.” She hugged him and gestured to her side. “This is Hannah.”
“Nice to meet you.” He smiled, but I continued to scowl at him. “Come inside, please.” The kid stepped aside and let us in, but I stayed at the door, letting the women go ahead.
“You’re living together now?”
“Eric, I promise I have the best intentions. Kat is amazing and I swear-”
“You’ve seen me use this, so I’m sure I don’t need to threaten you,” I tapped the Sig on my hip. He shut up quickly, nodding. “But I don’t need a gun to end your life, just so we’re clear.” He got my subtext and swallowed the lump in his throat, before a scream came from the kitchen. I drew the Sig and ran past Matthew, who followed after me.
Coming around the corner, I saw Jessica and Kat in a blissful embrace, both smiling and laughing. Hannah stood off to the side until they finished introductions, at which point Kat hugged her, too. I knew I made a good call bringing Hannah here, because the best person I knew would help her find her way back. Realizing I had my handgun drawn, I quickly holstered it.
“Eric?” Kat asked, seeing me over Jessica’s shoulder. She ran into my arms, hugging me tight. “It’s so good to see you!” I hugged her back, smiling. Try as I might to deny it, I think my eyes teared up a little. “Come on,” she stepped back and pulled out a chair at their kitchen table, “you guys have to have lunch with us.” Hannah stepped back, wrapping her arms around herself.
“I’ll just go, I think,” she spoke quietly.
“No, please, sit.” Kat walked over and lightly put a hand on her arm, guiding her to the table. Hannah reluctantly sat and Kat went back to the oven. Now past the nervousness of seeing my adopted daughter, the smell of ham wafted through the room and I noticed mashed potatoes on the stove.
“She’s really something, isn’t she,” Matthew muttered next to me, more of a statement than a question. “Eric,” He turned to look at me, “can I talk to you in private?” I walked with him into the living room, out of earshot of the kitchen.
“I hope this is important, because you’re taking me away from home cooking right now.”
“You could say that,” He laughed nervously and pulled a small box from his pocket. Opening it up, a thin ring gleamed inside. I stared at the jewelry for a while before looking up with a hopeful expression.
“I would, but I’m just not ready for that kind of commitment.” He didn’t laugh, sighing.
“Eric, be serious, what do you think?”
“Of the ring?”
“Of me asking Katherine to marry me. I’ve had this thing since we raided a shopping mall in Austin, but I was waiting for the right moment. With everything that happened…we’re finally in a good place, and with you and Jessica here…You’re like her parents.”
“Are you asking for my permission, Kid?” His head wobbled with stress, but he shrugged and met my gaze, trying his best to stand still.
“Yes, sir. I know she’s basically your daughter, and you terrify the absolute shit out of me, but I love her and I would very much like to ask her to marry me.”
“Oh, I know you love her. Anyone dumb enough to take on a courthouse full of trained soldiers, especially in the shape you were in, has to love whoever is on the other side of those doors.”
“Is that a yes?” he asked, his tone strained.
“You’ve shown that you’re a good guy, Kid, and you seem to make her happy, so yeah, you can ask.” He grinned from ear to ear, but I grabbed him by the shoulder and stopped him. “Just don’t forget that fear, because my promise stands if you hurt her.”
“Yes, sir.” He hugged me awkwardly and went to the kitchen, a bounce in his step. I rolled my eyes before joining them at the table, sitting down to eat lunch and catch up. We heard about them going places and genuinely enjoying life, sharing about our adventures in the wasteland since leaving San Antonio. Kat seemed concerned for our safety with the increase in feral activity, but I assured her that we were alright.
“I’d like to say something, if that’s okay?” Matthew held up his glass, looking to me. Thinking of Hannah, I shook my head subtly. He was confused, but adapted quickly. “I just wanted to say how nice it is to see everyone at this table, and how welcome it is to have a new face as well.” He smiled at Hannah, and she returned a half-smile, trying. It was a start, which was everything after what she had been through.
We all toasted and drank, returning to casual conversations. A while later, I excused myself from the table and met Matthew in the other room, explaining the situation. He understood, nodding, before Hannah stepped into the room.
“Thank you,” she said quietly. “I know you did that out of concern for me, Eric, but I’m not stupid, and neither are they.” She nodded over her shoulder before turning to Matt. “You were going to propose, weren’t you?” Hurt washed over her features, but she stayed strong. He didn’t say anything, but his silence spoke volumes. “I thought so. Look, what happened to me…” She trailed off, taking a moment to pull herself together. “My tragedy shouldn’t take away from anyone’s happiness. Please, go in there and propose to that girl.” I looked to her, then to him, to find him doing the same.
“Are you sure?” He was hesitant, aware of her fragile emotional state. She smiled warmly, a real smile this time, as she reflected.
“I remember the day Michael asked me to marry him, it was the happiest day of my life. I wouldn’t take that from anyone, and Mike wouldn’t, either.” Matthew nodded, walking back into the kitchen.
“Thank you,” I offered, but she shook her head.
“They deserve to be happy, because I know they’ve been through a lot together.” She stared into the kitchen, but I knew she wasn’t actually here mentally.
“It hurts like hell,” I spoke softly, knowingly. “You never really get over losing someone like that, but it gets easier to breathe after a while.” She could tell I was speaking from personal experience, tearing up. “Someday, you’ll realize they would want you to be happy, but until then try to focus on the good memories. Hold onto those with everything you have, because that’s what will get you through the worst nights.”
She wiped her eyes and hugged me, letting herself have a moment of weakness. When she was finished, she withdrew from me and looked up.
“I’ll try to remember that.” I walked with her back into the kitchen, just in time to see Matthew propose another toast.
“With everyone here, I have something to say again.” Kat looked impatiently up from her conversation with Jessica.
“Matt, sweetie, you don’t have to propose a toast every time you have something to say.” He licked his lips, embarrassment and anxiety tight on his face.
“Then I guess I’ll skip the toast and just propose.” He knelt in front of her, pulling the ring from his pocket. The antique silver glittered in the sunlight from the window, and Kat’s breath caught in her throat as she teared up. “You are an incredible woman, Kat. Your strength and compassion and…just everything, constantly blows me away, and I can’t think of anyone I’d rather spend my life with. Katherine Elizabeth, would you do me the honor of being my wife?” Shock doesn’t begin to describe the look on her face as she looked to me, speechless and worried that I was about to murder him. I shrugged, cocking my head as if to say, throw the kid a bone.
“Yes!” She exclaimed through tears. “Oh my God, yes!” She pulled him close and kissed him, pulling back just long enough to let him slide the ring on her finger. After Kat drifted back down from cloud nine, she turned to Mills. “Jessica, I want you as my maid of honor.” Mills jerked back.
“I think I’m more of a matron at my age, Kat.”
“Maid, matron, just please stand up there with me?” Her frown was adorable, persuading Jessica to say yes without another thought. It was a beautiful moment, one that Hannah shared in to see the ring and talk wedding plans, but Kat stood and walked over to me after a while.
A Broken World (Book 3): Fractured Memories Page 6