by Susan Shay
As her heart rate slowed, she became aware of Keegan on the floor with her, holding her, rocking her, murmuring to her. Relaxing her hands, she crept them around his neck and held tight.
When he realized she was back, he relaxed his embrace enough to look into her face. “Are you okay?”
She nodded, unable to stop the final sob.
“Good.” Using one hand, he wiped the tears from her face. “Is—is that what Miriam went through?”
Satisfied to stay in his arms, she rested her head on his chest so she wouldn’t have to see his face while she answered. “I believe so. At least, I’m fairly certain those were hers. Do you recognize any of them?”
“No. Most of it looked like what she would wear, except those red things.” He sighed. “Do you know if they’re hers?”
Wishing she didn’t have to, she nodded. “I was with her when she bought them, not long after Steve served her with divorce papers. She’d planned to turn over a new leaf. Wanted someone in her life to just once think of her as sexy.”
“Instead, whoever did this called her ‘Whore of Babylon.’ ”
Just to whisper the word took all her strength. “Yes.”
He dipped his chin and looked deep into her soul. “Is she still alive?”
Pausing, she waited for the answer. “Honestly, Keegan, I don’t know. She was when she last touched her laundry, but beyond that...” Utter helplessness filling her, she shook her head.
“Can you tell how long ago this happened?”
Again she shook her head. “The only way I can gauge time is by the strength of the emotion, so it could have been an hour ago or it could have been this morning. It would have to have been an extreme emotion to have lasted at that intensity for much longer—but then again, I’m not really sure.”
His voice dropped so low, it was barely more than a rumble in his chest. “Any indication who it was who frightened her?”
“No.” Frustration built until she couldn’t contain it any longer. “Keegan, I’m afraid I’m working blind here. Maybe if I’d used my gift over the years, I could tell you more. But I’m afraid it’s atrophied like a muscle that’s not been used. You’re stuck with a psychic who needs Braille signposts and a seeing-eye dog.”
Blowing out a breath, he closed his eyes for a moment, then looked at her. “So what do we do now?”
Her heart ached for him, and while she wished she could take some of his anguish, soon she would be dealing with all the pain she could handle. “All I can tell you is there’s something, some connection, here in the apartment building.”
He got to his feet and helped her up. “Want to start with Miss Marcie or Miss Ruthy?”
To have a private emotion—one that wasn’t the residue from someone else—was such a welcome relief, she gave him a sheepish grin. “Miss Ruthy, please. I’m not quite ready to face Marcie yet.”
He nodded, understanding completely. “I wonder if they’re home.”
She thought of the cranky old woman who’d forced cake on customers all day. “I imagine Miss Marcie ordered everyone out of the store as soon as we left. After all, it was getting close to five o’clock, and with things like they were, she’d shut it down.”
Picking up the bag, he started to gather Miriam’s things.
Cassie stopped him. “We’d better leave those. The police might want to see the evidence like it is.”
Looking territorial, he pulled Miriam’s clothing nearer. “What if someone comes in? They’ll move them, won’t they?”
As gently as possible, she pulled him away. “I don’t think we have to worry about too many of our residents doing laundry tonight. It’s Christmas Eve.”
As they left the laundry room, carefully locked, he caught her hand, sparking light and warmth. Back inside the main part of the apartment house, there was a knock on the building’s front door. Startled, she glanced at him. “Who could that be, tonight of all nights?”
Brow puckered, he shook his head. “Let’s find out.”
Restlessness crept into her bones. What was wrong with her? If Steve was back from Austin with her mother, she wouldn’t be feeling like this. Maybe chagrined or exasperated, but not restless. Wary. Guarded.
Unable to stand back and let something happen to Keegan without standing beside him, she butted her shoulder to his while he swung the door open. Then her heart dropped out of her chest.
Howard.
The frown lines and gray hair made her stepfather look years older than his actual age. She couldn’t imagine a young woman wanting him, but then there was no accounting for taste. Or the lengths some women would go to for money.
Howard glanced at Keegan, then his gaze drifted to her. Picking up his bag, he stepped inside. His words were, as usual, blunt and straight to the point. “Is your mother here?”
Gripping Keegan’s hand, she stepped away from Howard. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m chasing your mother. I can’t figure what got into her, running off like this the night before Christmas and the week before Alexandra’s wedding. Have you seen her?”
She could feel the frustration building in Keegan. “Mom’s gone out to eat. She’ll be back in a while. If you want, you can wait for her in my apartment.”
Releasing Keegan, she started toward the stairs, but Howard’s words stopped her. “Hell, I can’t climb those stairs. I just had my hip replaced, and I shouldn’t even be here.”
The anxiety building in her was almost more than she could bear. How could she take care of her stepfather when every minute her friend was missing was a minute she could be suffering? “Keegan, is it all right if Howard waits for Janneth in Miriam’s apartment?”
His face clouded, Keegan nodded sharply. “Yeah, fine. While you get him settled, I’m going to go upstairs and check the hens’ apartments.”
Cassie nodded, opened Miriam’s door and waved Howard inside. Then she hurried to catch up with Keegan. “I don’t know what it is, Keegan, but I-I feel as if every minute counts. While you check with Marcie and Ruthy, I’ll check Vern’s and Mack’s. And Keegan, even if you don’t see anything, open yourself up to any feelings you get. At least try, okay?”
“Yeah.” Sliding his fingers across her cheek, he gave her a swift kiss, then jogged up the stairs.
Reluctantly, she made her way back to Miriam’s apartment. Howard leaned against the back of a chair as if the trip had exhausted him. “Do you need anything?”
“No. Just help me get to a chair, please.” As he rested his weight on her, she scrambled to erect a wall to close off his feelings, but she wasn’t fast enough. Luckily the only emotions she received were the ones he’d experienced just after he’d married her mother, when she’d had her fall. Pity, embarrassment, and superiority—his three favorites. But now the pity was for himself and the state of his health. His embarrassment because it looked as if Janneth had left him, and his superiority was because he was a doctor. Smarter than the others around him, even though he hadn’t been able to take much care of his practice lately, doing most of his work through his assistant.
Janneth would be relieved when she found out that he only used his assistant as a working associate, not a lover. But there wasn’t time to explain things to him now.
She couldn’t allow her focus to leave Miriam. The bubble of anxiety had grown to the size of a balloon, ready to smother her. Something was wrong, and that something was close by. Quietly, she left Miriam’s apartment and, heart in her throat, hurried to Vern’s door.
Might as well take care of the hardest first.
Chapter Eighteen
Cassie tapped lightly on the door. When Vern opened it, she wondered if he’d been sleeping, then realized he wasn’t wearing his ever-present glasses. He blinked at her for a moment. “Well, happy holiday, Cassie girl. What brings you out on Christmas Eve?”
Her anxiety swelled, leaving no time for subtleties. She drew a ragged breath. “Miriam is missing, Vernon. Have you seen her?”
“Missing? What do you mean?” Concerned, he opened the door wider in invitation.
She stepped into the old man’s apartment filled with pictures of him and his wife and a progression of dogs they’d owned over the years. Cassie had been in the room before, but she’d never noticed how bare it was. How it ached with loneliness. “I mean she hasn’t been seen since she left the store yesterday. Have you talked to her or seen her at all?”
Vern shoved his hands into his pants pockets, tucked his chin, then shook his head. “Nope, I can’t say that I have. Have you checked with that new fellow of hers? Maybe she’s with him.”
“There is no new fellow. She’s been seeing Steve, her ex-husband, and he’s beside himself.” Heart aching, she fought the tears rising in her throat. “They were supposed to announce their engagement tonight and get remarried tomorrow, but we can’t find her. No one can.”
Vern made a low noise in his throat. “Now, don’t be so dramatic, little lady. She’s around somewhere. Maybe she just has the jitters. Why don’t you sit down and let me pour you a cup of coffee to settle you? Decaf.”
“I don’t have time, Vern.” She glanced around the apartment. “Is it all right if I look around in here? Just so I can satisfy the police that we’ve searched everywhere?”
The old man narrowed his eyes. “You think she could be hiding in here?” His bark of laughter caught Cassie in the stomach, stealing her breath and forcing her back a step.
She had to do something, had to see if Miriam had been there, even without Vern’s blessing. Closing her eyes a moment, she opened herself completely. After finding her center, she slowly inhaled. Miriam...
Far away in the corner of her mind, darkness yawned from a deep, empty chasm.
Mesmerized, she gave full attention to the rift. A black hole, heavy with gravity, engulfing, then destroying, all that came near. And in that black hole—
“Cassie?”
The voice was distant. Faint.
“Cassie, what’s wrong?” Vern’s insistence broke her concentration.
She couldn’t do it from there. The abyss was too far, the distractions too numerous. Disappointment weighing her, she pulled back, then opened her eyes.
Exhaustion consumed her, making her feel older than time. Wishing she could rest, she lifted one hand to her head. When had she become so weak? Would she be able to complete the journey that lay ahead?
“Are you all right? Should I call 911?”
She once more looked at his drawn eyebrows, stern yet anxious face, and had a glimpse of the sheriff he’d once been. Strong and caring, he’d lived his career until his wife’s health had forced his retirement. Why had he never spoken of how leaving the job had been like an amputation for him?
Had he told her? Or had the walls she’d erected in order to survive kept her from understanding? Wearily, she forced a smile. “I’m fine, Vern. Just so worried about Miriam.”
“Want me to help you search?” Standing there in his stocking feet without his glasses, he believed he was ready for anything.
She couldn’t just tell him she couldn’t use him. It would break his heart, then leave him in turmoil for the rest of the night. “You could help me with something while I search for her.”
“Just name it.” Padding to the couch, he sat down and started pulling on his shoes.
After wracking her mind for the best way to approach the idea, she moved to sit with him on the sofa. “My stepfather is in Miriam’s apartment. He’s had hip surgery recently and has a hard time getting around. Would you keep him company, in case he needs something or is uncomfortable? It would take a load off my mind.”
Vern nodded immediately. “Whatever I can do, Cassie girl. If that’s what you need, I’ll take care of it.”
“Thank you.” The nagging inside her increased. She had to go. Had to find Miriam before it was too late.
After telling Vern goodbye, she left his apartment, shut the door behind her, and stepped into the encroaching night. Somewhere, something called to her, luring her.
Her body felt as if were out of balance—as if her right side weighed more than the left. She walked away from the apartment house, past the community room, and onto the yellowing grass. The outbuilding, where the lawn equipment was stored, squatted in the darkness like a poison mushroom, not far from the parking area. Centering herself, she braced her feet apart, took a breath, and gazed that direction. Yes, the pull was still clear, but somehow it had spread. Stalking her. Surrounding her.
After a moment, she heard Vern’s door open, then watched as he walked into the main building. When she was sure she was once more alone, she crossed the yard to the shed.
Because there was no electricity, the building was dark. She opened the door, then waited for her eyes to adjust. A wishful memory of her industrial strength rubber gloves flickered through her mind. No. She didn’t truly want the gloves. They were a wall, a way to keep others’ emotions out. She must put the self-protection away and embrace every emotion in order to find Miriam.
Somehow she must find a way to accept the dark hole—internalize the abyss— until she became part of it. And it became part of her. Only then would she be able to move through the darkness to find her friend.
Finally able to see a bit, she moved past the mower to a large space. Forcing her shields completely away, she opened herself. Hands shoulder high, palms out, she searched. Miriam? She turned one quarter of the way around and tried again. Yes, she could feel Miriam’s essence, but there was something...
Remembering the need for oxygen, she pulled air into her lungs and turned again. Miriam?
The beat of Miriam’s heart pulsed inside Cassie, but not the action of her mind. Deep shadows crept through her in thick, uneven waves, making it hard to concentrate. Where was Miriam? She had been there, she could feel her, but—
“Cassie?”
Pulse jumping, she whirled to find Mack standing in the doorway. Uneasiness crept down her spine. How had he approached her without her knowledge? Why hadn’t she felt his presence?
Face in full shadow, the old man leaned against the door frame as if he wasn’t strong enough to stand without support. “When I saw someone moving out here, I thought I’d do what Marcie told us and check it out. What are you doing?”
“Miriam’s gone.” Shocked that words had come from her mouth without her volition, Cassie clenched her jaw for a moment. “Someone—something has happened to her.”
Holding his left arm close to his chest, Mack stumbled backward into the dim light, his face filled with agony. He took a rough breath, then sagged to the ground.
Fear blazed through Cassie. “What is it, Mack? What’s wrong?”
“I, m-my heart pills. On the table next to my chair. G-get them for me. Please.” His words were little more than a whisper.
Knowing that time was working against her, she ran to his apartment. The table by his chair was empty. Frantic, she glanced at the chair, then around the floor. Nothing.
Her pounding heart sent blood pumping into her brain until pinpoints of light sparked in the gathering darkness.
Darkness?
Suddenly lightheaded, she prayed she wouldn’t lose her balance. Although she tried, she couldn’t force enough air into her lungs to relieve the burning. Now the room was thick with darkness, like odorless smoke passing between her and the light. She was mired. Unable to escape.
Cassie blinked hard when the door opened. Mack stood well back, but when she looked at him, he smiled. “Welcome.”
The world shifted into slow motion as he walked into the room. What was he doing there? She’d thought he was having a heart attack, but now he looked healthier than she’d ever seen him.
He moved painlessly about the room, stroking the birdhouses that stood on every surface in every size, shape, and color imaginable. Why had he kept them, rather than giving them as gifts or mounting them for birds to nest in?
“This is my latest creation.” He turned to the workbe
nch that stood where a dining table had once been. “What do you think?”
Fear caused her breath to swell in her lungs until they felt as if they would burst as she fought to see past the darkness. There, illuminated as if on display, was a miniature of the apartment house. Identical to the main part of the building, it was perfect down to the shingles and brickwork. As if drawn by a force she couldn’t resist, she edged closer. High on the back of the birdhouse, inside the window that would be hers, the curtain color was perfect. He’d missed no detail.
Even the window sills were tiny pieces of wood, cut, fitted, and painted to exactly match the house. The only thing that didn’t match exactly was the frame around the circular window near the front door. Instead of white, the frame was gold metal.
It looked just like the ring Miriam had worn around her neck on a silk cord since Steve had filed for the divorce. Miriam’s wedding ring.
Cassie’s heart skipped a beat, then hammered triple time. She moved to the next house. There a small, filigreed chain edged the roof. Knowing danger might lie in doing so, she forced herself to touch the tiny links as she searched for an emotion.
Terror. Faint, almost unfathomable because of the months it had been there, yet it had survived.
An icy hand gripped her as she moved to the next one. A row of tiny hoops glinted from the base. Forcing herself to breathe, she ran the tip of her index finger over them, hoping to learn something. Anything. This time the fright was more pointed, although weak, and her muscles tightened with it.
She shifted to the next. After circling it and seeing nothing, she looked again. There, worked into the siding of what looked like a miniature tavern, was a pair of horse head earrings.
“Do you like that one?” Mack’s voice came from a distance, echoing with strength, as if it belonged to a younger, more virulent man. “It’s one of my favorites.”
Concentrating in order to do so, she nodded. “Yes, I do like it.” As if in admiration, she touched one of the earrings. This time the emotion was alive with anger and hatred, but an underlying horror caused a chill to ripple across her breasts and down the backs of her arms.
