by Susan Shay
An hour later, he’d driven down every street in town.
Now what?
Go home, loser. You can wait by the fire for Stone Hill’s finest to find them.
The hell he would. He couldn’t sit anywhere without moving. Could hardly stand the thought of sitting in the car while it moved. What he needed was to get out and run off some of his pent up anxiety.
So you’ll feel better. But what about the women in your life?
Gnawing on the inside of his cheek, he kept driving. Kept watching. Where could they be? It was as if they’d disappeared off the face of the earth.
For two hours he drove every street in Stone Hill. When he found himself at the edge of town where Meander Road entered the city limits. Frustrated, he slammed the heel of his hand into the steering wheel. Why couldn’t he do something to save the women he loved?
****
After talking to the police, Steve disconnected the phone and faced Cassie’s parents. Her step-father looked worried, but her mother just looked...satisfied. Did she ever show her true emotions, or was this the blessing of Botox?
Funny, when he and Miriam were married and he’d lived in this apartment, he’d felt like a guest, but now he felt he was as close as he could be to Miriam. Let Keegan go on a wild goose chase. Steve Cartwright was staying where he would be the first to hear when the police found them. Where he could man the phones and keep abreast of the search. And, if he was very lucky, he’d be the first to see Miriam—healthy, happy, and very, very alive. Please God.
“The police and Keegan and Vern are all out searching for Miriam and Cassie. And when daylight gets here, they’ll bring out more people and dogs to help with the search.” When Howard looked even more upset, Steve continued. “I’ll stay here in case someone tries to contact us. They want members from both families available.”
“You do have a cell phone, don’t you?” Janneth asked, her tone dry.
“Yes.” Steve frowned at the woman. “Why?”
She lowered her chin, and probably would have lifted one brow if she’d been able. “Because you should be out looking, too. The more people who are out there, the faster they’ll find my baby so we can all go home for Christmas...and Alexandra’s wedding.”
When Howard made a noise, she flew to his side and perched on the arm of his chair. “But you know it’s true, darling. A girl only gets married once in her life, and she wants all the pomp as well as her family, especially her mummy, by her side.”
“For God’s sake, Janneth. Don’t you get it? Cassaundra, your eldest daughter, has been kidnapped by a serial killer.” Howard lowered the chair’s footrest, then gripped her hands. “I don’t want to hear anything else about that wedding. If you need something to do, why don’t you make coffee and sandwiches for anyone who might get hungry? This is going to be a long night.”
“And if Steve would go out there and search like—”
“Mind your own damned business, Janneth. Steve is here so he can assist the police if they need anything.” He put his hand to his hip, then checked his watch. “Get me some water and my pain pills from the shaving kit in my bag. I hurt.”
While Janneth scurried away, Howard turned to Steve. “Sorry. She doesn’t mean to be a pain in the ass, but she just can’t help it. Deep down, she has a good heart. I think.”
“Yeah. At least it’s likely she has one.” Steve walked to the window and looked out. The streets were practically empty, not unusual for Christmas Eve. Families were together, opening presents, eating sumptuous meals, and reminiscing about happy memories.
For millions of people in the world, simply being together was the best part of Christmas—but in his life, it had never been that way. For him, there had always been a tickle he couldn’t ease. A door he couldn’t close. While others recalled childhood holidays, his mind focused on the new woman in his life. How to get away to make a secret phone call. The excitement of slipping out for an afternoon rendezvous. The immature life he’d never outgrown.
Until this year.
Finally, he’d learned what was important in life. What was real and what was just damned stupid. And he’d had enough of just damned stupid. Now he wanted real. An old-fashioned Christmas with Miriam. On their wedding night, he’d even planned to give her the baby she’d always wanted. Now that was the way to really celebrate the beginning of the rest of his life.
Instead, if the police didn’t find her in time, he could be mourning all the days lost to him and Miriam.
But damn, why did the bastard have to take Cassie, too? According to Miriam, she was the only one who could know something—who could have sent them in the right direction. She had been their only real hope. “Janneth, did Cassie ever mention anything to you about being a psychic?”
The turn Janneth made should have screwed her into the floor. “What did you say, young man?”
Her attempt at intimidation was laughable. “I said, did you know that Cassie was psychic?”
With the remains of Howard’s water in one hand and his bottle of pills in the other, she did her best to flounce toward him. “Well, I nev—”
“Tell him,” Howard shouted over her words.
Her turn back toward her husband sloshed the water right out of the glass and onto the floor. “But, Howard—”
“I said tell him, dammit.” Pain etching his features, Howard closed his eyes, then pushed back in the chair. “What can it hurt at this point?”
Janneth’s mouth went slack, then her whole body sagged as she dropped to the nearby couch. She shook her head and took a long breath, the drama queen once more. “It started so suddenly, right after Howard and I were married. I really thought she was just trying to get to me. To take my attention away from him.”
I, me, my. Didn’t the woman ever talk about anything but herself? “What started, Janneth?”
“It scared me, really. She would be going along just fine, then suddenly out of the blue, she’d be in hysterics, screaming about seeing blood and dying, as if she’d been in the emergency room with Howard. And she began having these awful dreams at night. It was just...creepy.” Closing her eyes so tightly they crinkled, she gave a delicate shudder.
Howard took over the story. “From the sudden onset, I thought she might have brain damage from a fall she took. When it didn’t stop, we sent her for testing.”
Sent. Funny how it didn’t sound as if they’d been there with her.
“She went to the very best hospital in Kansas City,” Janneth added, her voice once more little-girl high. “But do you think she appreciated it? No.”
Steve focused on Howard. “Did you ever experience an episode?”
The older man glanced furtively at Janneth, then with a little nod, shrugged. “Yes, once. It was just a few weeks after we were married. I was putting away a few things in my study. She reached up and touched my antique dagger. Then she looked at me with a sad sort of smile on her little face and said, ‘She’s going to be unhappy for a long time, isn’t she?’ I asked her who, and she answered, ‘The pretty redheaded lady who cried so hard when she gave it to you. I’ll love you and I’ll always love you. If I see you twenty years from now, I’ll still love you. She was quoting exactly what Cecilie had said when she’d given it to me that morning.”
“Cecilie who?” Janneth demanded, her arms folded across her chest.
“Oh, for God’s sake, Janneth.” Howard shifted uncomfortably in the chair. “That was a long time ago. What difference does it make?”
Eyes blazing, she sat poker straight. “It was that damned redheaded nurse you had, wasn’t it? Nurse Ratchet?”
“Cecilie Rancher, not Ratchet. And if you’ll remember, she quit working for me then.” He squinted, then blinked a couple of times, as if having trouble focusing.
“But that doesn’t mean you stopped seeing her, does it?” Janneth’s pout made her look even uglier than her anger.
“Oh, hell, Janneth...” As the pain pills took effect, settled deeper into t
he chair.
“So she can do it.” Steve sat on the arm chair.
Janneth lifted one shoulder. “I really don’t like to talk about it. It just makes her so different. So weird. When I got pregnant, I wanted to have pretty, popular daughters. Cheerleaders or prom queens. Not gypsy palm readers.”
“Can you do it?” he asked.
Her eyes grew wide. “Me? Why, I-I couldn’t... I wouldn’t know...”
Moving across the room, he sat on the couch near her. “Think about it, Janneth. You could be our only connection to Miriam and Cassie. The only way to save them. And it would make you famous.”
He knew immediately that had been the wrong thing to say. Her face took on the look of a feral cat, and all hope of convincing her was gone. “And have the world think I’m weird, too? No, thank you.”
****
So little light, outside or deep within. Emotions gone, no worries, no rancor. And no joy. Was she finally lost as she’d long expected?
Cassie inhaled. Rank odors assaulted her, too horrible and confusing to identify, but so revolting her lungs rebelled, making her stomach heave. As she dipped her chin to escape the stench, she became aware of the surface beneath her cheek. Cool, smooth, and grainy with dirt, the floor chilled her to the marrow. As she pushed upright, rough metal biting into her wrists and dragging at her ankles startled her. What—
“Cas-sie?” Miriam’s voice cracked, then she rasped, “Are you okay?”
Cassie could hardly see Miriam in the dingy light. Chained on the other side of the small room, she wore what looked like a dirty black garment. A monk’s robe?
Beyond her the space was empty. The mud-colored walls were crowded with crosses of varying sizes and made of every material available—plastic, ceramic, paper, wood, even some that looked as if they were cast from cement. “Miriam, are you all right? Steve, Keegan, everybody is looking for you.” Us.
“Poor Keegan,” Miriam murmured brokenly in a voice that sounded as if she’d destroyed it with screaming. “You and Keegan were meant to be together. I’ve always known it. Even before. What will he do, now that he’s losing the only family he ever claimed? And Steve...”
“What do you mean losing you?” Cassie edged toward her, but heavy chains kept her from going far.
Miriam took an audible breath, then swallowed painfully. “You’re here now. I never thought that would happen. I hoped, with what you see, you would know about Mack. That he couldn’t fool—” A fit of coughing cut off her words, and afterward, she was so silent, Cassie thought she had fallen asleep.
“Cassie?” This time Miriam whispered, as if she didn’t have the strength to speak aloud. “It’s Mack, Cassie. He’s lost his mind.”
“I know.” Cassie didn’t bother trying to control the shiver that shook her. Mack Loper, retired high school principal, a serial killer? Even though she couldn’t doubt it, she still had trouble believing it was true.
The man she’d dealt with earlier wasn’t the Mack she’d known. His underlying tremor, his aura, wasn’t the same as she’d encountered for so many years. He was different, as if someone else lived deep within. Someone evil, created by too many years of pain and torment. Someone with the abhorrent face she’d seen earlier.
Realizing the damage it would take to cause a rift of that degree in him, she wanted to weep. It must have been deeply destructive and vile. In his lifetime, he must have survived the tortures of hell.
She glanced around the room. They were in what looked like a dugout, most of which was below ground. Without assistance, Keegan would never find them in time.
Heat, caused by pure panic, flashed through her. To reach out to Keegan, she would have to make herself vulnerable to everything that had happened in this room. Everything that had happened to Mack. All his pain and torture.
After experiencing it, what would happen to her?
“Miriam, are you awake?” Raising her voice, she called again, “Miriam?”
“Y-yes. I can’t sleep anymore. I-I keep seeing—” Miriam’s voice had dropped a full octave. “It’s worse than being awake.”
“I want you to do something. Are you listening?” Cassie made her voice sharp, insistent. “Think hard about Keegan. Not Steve or your wedding or anything else. Just Keegan.”
“O-okay,” Miriam breathed.
“If we both concentrate only on Keegan, he will be able to find us. Shout his name over and over in your mind. Visualize his face. Will him to come.” Cassie sat up straighter. “It’s the only way anyone is going to find us.” In time.
Miriam nodded, her eyes luminous. “But if he doesn’t find us, he’ll have to live with it forever.”
“That’s right,” Cassie conceded. “So he’d better get on the stick.”
Shutting out everything, she concentrated on Keegan. His dark eyes had drawn her to him in the beginning. Eyes the color of dark chocolate. Keegan...
It wouldn’t work. This way, she could never reach him. She had to find her center, open herself to everything.
Taking a deep breath, she slowly released it. As she began her descent, she could feel the unspeakable horrors that existed all around her. They beat at her, begging for entrance. Her heartbeat quickened, pumping at a furious rate.
She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t open herself up to the revulsion filling the room. It could mean living through all the experiences the other women had suffered. Their agony. Possibly even their deaths.
Destroy the walls completely or Keegan will never hear.
Her entire body quaked. In an effort to control the shaking, she backed into the corner, then pulled her knees to her chest and hugged them the best she could in the manacles.
Again she closed her eyes and began the journey that could change who she was forever. It was possible she wouldn’t be able to reassemble the intricately constructed walls that had taken so many years to build. Wouldn’t be able to blank out other’s emotions; dodge another’s unhappiness, sorrow, or agony.
But if she was blessed, if Keegan could lose his disbelief, they might save Miriam’s life.
Again, she started the descent. Her breath grew short, as if it barely reached her lungs before trying to escape. Her heart beat as if trying to pound itself to pieces, but she couldn’t stop. Couldn’t give in to her weaknesses. Gathering her fears to her, she continued.
As she moved downward through her own soul, her preservation instinct reared its head. But she continued—she had to rid herself of all safeguards. Her walls came to her, and one by one, she laid them away. Forever.
Janneth’s face appeared before her. Her nasal whine grated on Cassie’s ears. You can’t do this. You’ll bring embarrassment and humiliation on the family. Think of your sister. Think of your father. Think of me—
This is the reason, I was given this gift. I have no choice. If I fail to rise, all will be lost.
And I may be anyway.
Hours later—or was it mere moments?—from deep within, Cassie finally saw the reality of the world without the benefit of her defenses. At last she knew why light was unable to move easily through the dugout. The entire room was filled with hate that blanketed and blinded like heavy smoke.
Hate that flooded from the women Mack had kidnapped. Hate that emanated from the other Mack, the one she’d just met. Hate that smothered the light. Hate that, unchecked, would fill and destroy everyone it touched.
Now she must look past the darkness for the glow of Keegan’s love. For a moment, he came to her in a rush of warmth.
She saw clearly now that his love matched hers, but his tie to his career was strong. His life’s duty, as he saw it, was to expose men who preyed on those around them. If he didn’t accomplish that duty, he would always be a failure in his own eyes.
But with her defenses gone forever, if she survived today, she could never live in the world. She needed to find a secure place. And relatively safe. Much like Stone Hill, before Mack.
Rousing herself, she felt for Miriam. The wom
an was thinking of Keegan, reliving happy times, but not reaching out to him. “Miriam! Call for Keegan with your mind. Tell him where we are. Together, we can make him hear.”
“No. I can’t.” Her words were softer now. So soft, Cassie wondered if they were thoughts or words. “He’ll never find us...in time.”
Cassie drew her brows together and made her voice harsh. “Yes, he will! Stop acting so selfish and call him. Do it now!”
Shock and anger flashed from Miriam, rousing her and momentarily warming the room, but they quickly changed to understanding. “Yes. Okay.”
Certain Miriam understood the importance of their task, Cassie closed her eyes. Keegan...
After a time the door rattled, then slammed open with a dull thud, jarring Cassie. She gazed at the man she’d known so long, but hadn’t known at all.
Encased in a dark cloud, he moved as a shadow. Dark. Silent. How had he hidden his demons from her? Because she hadn’t wanted to see them. Hadn’t wanted to experience his pain. “Mack, thank God. Help us, please, Mack.”
Fury convulsed his familiar but alien features as he stormed toward her. “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord in vain.” Drawing back his left hand, he swung it, open handed.
Neck muscles wrenched as her head snapped around. Crushing pain radiated to her eye socket, down her cheek, and into her jaw. Pinpoints of light dimmed her vision.
But the physical pain was easy to bear compared to the jolt of anguish she received from inside Mack. The connection to him was brief, but enough to give her a glimpse of a woman whose evil obliterated the light.
Mother.
Chapter Twenty
Struggling to control the ache in her cheek as she absorbed Mack’s pain, Cassie took a shaky breath. “I know you’re hurting. I understand. Turn me loose so I can help you. Please.”
“The wage of sin is death. All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, the Father. But if you cast your sins from you, you shall be white as snow.” His face sharp, he frowned at her as if she should understand his meaning.
