by Jana Janeway
“You have got to get over this!” Bibi grabbed his arm, near about dragging him for the first few steps towards the subway.
As he fell in line beside her, he huffed in annoyance. “Get over what?”
She scoffed, knowing he knew full well what she was talking about. “This infatuation you have with Jessica!”
“Look, I care about her. I admit that, but that’s it! You’re reading too much into this.” He picked up the pace, wanting to get to the subway, and subsequently Nicholas’ apartment, as fast as possible.
“You’re either in denial,” Bibi said to him, calm but firm, “or you’re looking for me to buy into a lie that I’m just not gonna buy into!”
“I’m not looking for you to buy into anything, Bibi.” He groaned, dropping his head for a moment, but then looked back up to avoid crashing into people as he walked by them.
“How far are you willing to take this, Doc?”
The concern in her question was easily detectable to him. He sighed heavily in return before answering her. “As far as it takes.”
Bibi gave a short, sharp laugh, but added seriously, “And you wonder why I think you’re infatuated.”
“It’s not like it would have to be forever,” he muttered. “There is such a thing as divorce, you know.”
“But only if she doesn’t fall for you in the meantime, right?” She smirked to counterbalance her challenging tone. “You’re a big boy, Doc. If this is what you want. . . If you’re willing to make the sacrifices needed to be with her, and she feels the same way about you, I’ll support that. But! This is not the right time to be starting something! We need everyone involved to keep their head in the game! It’s a matter of life and death! And the last thing we need is for you to go off like a love sick fool at just the wrong moment and get us all killed!”
“I’ll keep my head in the game, Bibi,” he promised her. “You have my word.”
“Fine.” She pulled him into a half hug as they continued walking. “And, for whatever it’s worth, Nick doesn’t have a romantic thing for Jessica. He shares a sort of. . . kinship with her, ‘cause they’re both—” She stopped the sentence abruptly, not wanting passersby to overhear, then simply muttered, “You know.”
Nodding only once, a sheepish expression on his face, he offered a simple ‘‘Kay’ in response, then gestured towards the subway entrance as it came into view.
As they started to descend the stairs, Bibi whispered, “We’ll talk about the getting high thing later.”
Leaning in, he whispered back, “I thought you said you weren’t judging me.”
“Not judging. Just wanted to talk to you about it.”
****
Everyone in the apartment was fast asleep. . . Everyone, it seemed, except for Craddock. But it wasn’t just Josiah’s snoring that kept him from finding the land of dreams.
Assuming he was alone in his insomnia, it surprised him to hear one of the back bedroom doors creak open, and he nearly held his breath as he waited to see who would be appearing at the mouth of the hallway. Seeing who it was, he sat upright, offering a small smile, which was returned.
“Can’t sleep?”
Approaching slowly, Jessica shook her head. “Bibi kicks in her sleep.”
“Josiah snores.” Craddock glanced at the man partially responsible for why he was still up as he climbed off the shared hide-a-bed. “Were you looking for a glass of water? Or food or something?”
Again, she shook her head. “I was looking for you.”
He swallowed hard, his throat suddenly tight. “Why?”
“I was hoping. . .” She trailed off, trying to find a way to word her request. “Could you just. . . hold me? For a little while?”
Pausing for only a moment, he nodded, and then he gestured to the oversized chair to the left of the couch. Sitting first, he patted the small amount of seat beside him, and as she inched in next to him, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her towards him.
Settling in, she rested her head between his chest and shoulder. “Is this weird?”
“No,” he assured her. “You’ve been through a lot. It’s Mengliad nature to want comforting affection in times like this.”
“Human nature, too,” she mentioned.
He grinned, leaning his head against hers. “So I’ve heard.”
Falling into silence, after several minutes had passed, Craddock would have thought she had nodded off to sleep, if not for the way her fingers drummed against him. She was doing it subconsciously, he was sure, but that didn’t hinder his enjoyment of it. There was something about the action that hinted at a certain level of familiarity.
Lulled by it—by the rhythm of it and by what it implied—he was relaxed to the point that, when she suddenly spoke up, it startled him.
“Thank you for all your help today. You helped make a very scary situation a little less traumatic.”
He shook his head, feeling unworthy of her gratitude. “I’m sorry I added to it.”
“How did you add to it?” she asked, confused.
“When I thought we would have to do the BTR the old-fashioned way.”
“That wasn’t the scary part. I could hear what you were saying. I knew you were just trying to do what was needed. It was the not being able to move, or communicate. That was what was scary.”
“I’m sure it was.” He planted a consoling kiss in her hair. “Some people, after that, need a shrink.”
“Answer me this,” she asked of him, a thought suddenly coming to mind. “If Mengliads can’t get sick, or catch viruses or whatever, why were you so worried about things being sterile?”
He cringed, remembering what he had been so close to inflicting upon her. “You were, almost literally, between species. I was just being cautious. I wasn’t sure what the Human properties in you would do, if I had introduced some kind of infection or something.”
“I’m not complaining. I was just curious.”
“I know.”
“If they find me, will they torture me before they kill me?”
Her passivity, as if she was resigned to her fate, caused a physical ache to swell in his chest. He closed his eyes against the discomfort, needing a moment to find his voice so that could answer her.
“Don’t talk like that, Jessica, please.”
“I don’t want to die,” she whispered. He held her tighter when she started to cry.
“You’re not going to.” His confidence was feigned. “I’m prepared to do whatever it takes, to prevent that from happening.”
“Meaning what?” she asked, assuming he meant that he was willing to put his own life on the line.
“Just that.” He kept his answer vague on purpose. It was too complicated, too emotional a subject, to get into right then. Especially after the day she’d had, while functioning on little to no sleep. “Close your eyes. Try to get some rest.”
The suggestion startled her a little. “Right here? With you?”
“Yes.” He added with a touch of humor, “Unless you’d rather go back in there with Ms. Soccer-Legs.”
She smiled through her tears, almost laughing. “I think I’ll pass.”
“I could move back to the hide-a-bed,” he offered, “if that would make you more comfortable.”
When he felt her shake her head, he fought to keep his triumph from manifesting itself in embarrassing ways. “Go to sleep now. You need the rest.”
She nodded, yielding. “Goodnight.”
Kissing her hair, he returned the sentiment. “Sweet dreams.”
Chapter Eleven
“Should we wake them?”
“In a few minutes. Let them sleep. They’re both exhausted.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“Yes.”
“What did he say?”
“He said he’s willing to take it all the way.”
“Did you try to talk him out of it?”
“No. It wouldn’t have done any good. I will if it comes down to that, tho
ugh.”
“He’s not thinking clearly!”
“I know. He thinks he’s in love.”
“Based on what? He hasn’t even kissed her yet!”
“Sshh! You’ll wake them!”
“Why is she letting him do this? Doesn’t she understand what this would mean for him?”
“I don’t think he’s told her.”
“Maybe we should!”
“Craddock would have kittens! Literally! In a box under the stairs and everything!”
“We can’t just let this happen, Bibi! I don’t want to lose him!”
“I’m going to do my best to talk him out of it, Josiah, I promise, but ultimately, it’s his decision.”
When Jessica heard footsteps retreating, and she was sure it was safe to, she slowly opened her eyes. Glancing over at the man next to her, her heart started to race as all that was said started sinking in. Craddock thought he was in love with her. That was why he was willing to risk his life, and probably die, to spare hers. That’s what he meant, when he’d said he would do whatever it took.
There was no way she could let that happen. No way she could live with herself, if he died in her place. If his friends couldn’t talk him out of it, she doubted she would have any better luck doing so. There was only one option, in her mind.
Carefully disentangling herself from Craddock’s weak embrace, she slowly inched off the chair, glancing around the room before grabbing her glasses off the end table nearby and pushing them onto her face. Knowing it would probably wake him to do so, she forced herself not to touch him, and only whispered a faint ‘goodbye’ before snagging her shoes off the floor near the door and leaving through it.
****
Craddock yawned as he stumbled into the kitchen, pushing his glasses to the top of his head to wipe the sleep from his eyes.
“Mornin’!” Bibi offered brightly. “I was just about to wake you two up! Jessica needs to eat, and we have to discuss strategies. I know Nick said we could stay here for as long as we needed to, but all this puts him at risk, too.” She glanced past him, towards the door he had just entered through. “Is she still sleeping? ‘Cause she should really get up now, at least to eat something.”
Nodding, he muttered, “She’s up. In the bathroom, I think.”
“Who’s in the bathroom?” Nicholas asked as he walked through the swinging door, only hearing the last sentence said.
“Jessica,” Bibi answered casually, moving to get three more bowls out of the cupboard.
“She’s not in the bathroom.” Nicholas’ eyebrows furrowed. “I was just in there.”
“Maybe she went back to the guestroom to lie down?” Josiah offered optimistically, as he noticed everyone’s expressions change to concern.
Nicholas shook his head. “I checked in there first, before going to the bathroom. Looking for you,” he added, pointing at Bibi.
For only the briefest of moments, they glanced around at one another, then, as if a cannon had just gone off, they all jumped and ran into the living room. They split up immediately, Bibi checking the guestroom, Josiah checking the bathroom, Nicholas checking his room, and Craddock looking up and down the hall outside the front door.
“She’s not here.” Bibi stated the obvious, her attention landing on Craddock, to see what his reaction would be.
“Shit!” he snapped, staring back at Bibi. “Why did she leave? Where did she go?”
“I don’t know.” She spoke calmly, knowing he was on the verge of complete nuclear meltdown.
Suddenly, Josiah gasped, and all eyes in the apartment were on him in a flash.
Avoiding Craddock, and only glancing briefly at Nicholas, Josiah leaned in towards Bibi. “You don’t suppose she heard us talking earlier, do you?”
If he could have, Craddock would have leapt out of his own skin, Bibi was sure of it.
“What were you talking about?” he demanded to know. “What did you say?”
“Craddock, calm down.” Bibi’s tone was soft and untroubled.
“I will not calm down!”
Nicholas immediately moved away from the scene. Josiah started fidgeting uncomfortably.
“We didn’t say anything specific, okay?” Bibi finally answered him, knowing if she didn’t, he was likely to explode. “But we may have implied that you were willing to make sacrifices for her that we personally are not happy about.”
“I gotta go get her back.” Craddock pushed his feet into his shoes that sat by the door. “She probably went back to her apartment.”
“We’ll come with you.” When Bibi moved to grab her shoes as well, Josiah followed her.
“Why?” Craddock faced her, glaring. “Aren’t you glad she’s gone? Now, you don’t have to worry about what happens to her, right?”
“Oh, come on!” she exclaimed defensively. “That’s so not fair! I care what happens to her every bit as much as you do! I just also happen to care about what happens to you!”
“We’re wasting time.” Nicholas extended his hand, jingling the keys to his car. “We need to get to her before she’s spotted.”
“No, Nick,” Bibi said sternly, “you’re not going! It’s too dangerous! If you’re found in connection with her, they’ll start dredging up your information! Then my father will have died for nothing!”
After conceding the point with a heavy sigh, he extended his hand once again. “At least take my car.” He received a shake of his friend’s head in response.
“The car is registered in your name. Too risky. We’ll take a cab.” Hugging him quick as a thank you, and to say goodbye, she then turned to see Craddock heading out the door with Josiah close behind. As she raced after them, she called over her shoulder, “If you don’t hear from me in twenty-four hours, alert the Registry.”
****
As the cab pulled away, Bibi stopped Craddock from racing into the building by grabbing his arm, holding it tighter as he attempted to jerk it away from her.
“Just listen to me for a second,” she pleaded with him. She loosened her grip when he settled a little, as he looked back at her with questioning concern. “What if the roommate is in there? What if the brother is? If you go in there half-crazed, we’re gonna be sitting in handcuffs in the back of a squad car! And then how are we going to help Jessica?”
Knowing she was right, he gestured in agreement, taking several deep breaths to calm himself. Then, looking to Bibi, he nodded to state that he was ready and in control.
“You’re sure you can keep it together in there? ‘Cause Josiah and I can go in and—”
“I’m fine.” He cut her off, taking a step towards the lobby doors. “Let’s go.”
****
“And since when do you wear glasses?”
“They’re new, Stace, okay? And the trip just. . . got cancelled. My friend couldn’t go after all.”
“There’s something you’re not telling us. I can just sense it.”
“So, you’re psychic now, Shea? Stop being paranoid!”
Hearing the voices coming from the apartment, Craddock, Bibi, and Josiah stopped just outside, listening in for seconds only.
“They’re both in there,” Bibi whispered to Craddock. “The brother and the roommate. Be calm.”
Nodding once, he stepped past her and immediately through the open door of the apartment, virtually ignoring the man and other woman in the room as he locked eyes with Jessica.
“Craddock,” Jessica whispered. “What are you doing here?” Her gaze left his briefly when Bibi and Josiah entered, but then it returned.
“I need to talk to you.” He didn’t even flinch when Shea’s booming voice questioned the situation.
“What’s going on? Who are these people?”
First gesturing to Josiah to lock and chain the front door, Bibi then turned her attention to Shea, extending her hand and introducing herself. She hoped that it would distract him from what Josiah was doing, and from Craddock’s odd behavior. “Kristy Patella,” she said as s
he shook his hand, though he seemed reluctant to be returning it.
“Shea Mitchell.” The politeness he spoke with sounded forced, confirmed by the semi-glare he was pinning her with. “You’re the friend Jessica was going on the trip with.”
“I thought your name was Lilith.”
In response to Stacy’s puzzled comment, Shea looked from Bibi to her and then back again, realization showing in his expression. “You work at Judy’s.”
It was an accusation.
“Lilith is my waitressing name,” Bibi lied, glancing over to see that Craddock and Jessica had not moved an inch, and were still staring at each other intently. “Jessica, why don’t you go have a chat with Craddock in your room while I explain things to your brother and friend, okay?”
Nodding, Jessica finally broke eye contact with Craddock, gesturing for him to follow her as she headed for her room. Once they were inside, she closed the door, wanting the privacy. “Is she really going to explain things to them?”
Craddock shook his head. “She’ll make something up. Why did you leave?” he asked abruptly. “Do you have any idea the kind of danger you put yourself in?”
“You guys have done enough for me,” she answered, on the verge of tears. “I don’t want people to die on account of me.”
“If you let us help you, then no one will have to die!” he shot back in a whisper, pulling her into his arms and holding her tightly to him.
“After what you said last night. . . After what Bibi and Josiah were saying this morning. . . I won’t let you die for me, Craddock! I won’t let you swap your life for mine!”
Inching away from their embrace just enough, he stared back at her with a questioning scowl. “What are you talking about? Who said I was swapping my life for yours?”
“I. . . I just assumed. Because of what you said—”
“Jessica,” he interrupted, “that’s not what I was talking about. That’s not what Bibi and Josiah were talking about.”
Confused, she asked, “Then what were you talking about?”
He was reluctant to give details just yet, but felt he didn’t have a choice. “Basically, there is an option. It’s not one hundred percent foolproof, but it’s our strongest hope for getting everyone out of this.”
