by Karin Tabke
Joachim? she asked Lucien.
He is healing.
Dax?
Pulled in an hour ago with a load of AKs.
Slayers?
Four less we have to kill tomorrow.
Any of our people hurt or lost?
Lucien squeezed her hand. All present and accounted for.
Falon exhaled sharply. Thank God.
“I see the council did not err in their decision,” the old woman said, coming toward them, her brown eyes twinkling. She nodded to Lucien. “It’s good to see you in such good spirits, Lucien.” She looked at Falon and raised a silver brow. “Life with Mondragon seems to agree with you.”
“Mondragon and I have come to a mutual understanding,” Falon said quietly. Because anything more would seem like a public stab in Rafael’s back. Yes, she accepted her place here beside Lucien, but she did not want Rafael or any of Vulkasin to think she was skipping happily through the forest. She missed Rafa. She missed Vulkasin. They had accepted her before she knew what she was, or who she was. They would always have a special place in her heart.
“Why are you here?” Lucien quietly demanded.
Do not be rude, Falon said.
“You forget, Lucien, who it was who nursed you back to health after your parents were slain.”
“I forget nothing.”
“Your mother would be very unhappy with the disrespect you show me and the council.”
“Do not speak of my mother,” Lucien growled.
Lucien!
Stay out of this, Falon.
She was your nurse!
She has always favored Rafael. She is here for his benefit, not mine.
How can you say that? She gave me to you!
Be patient, she will reveal her real purpose and it will be about Rafe.
Jealousy does not become you.
Leave it alone.
Sharia nodded, but Falon could see the old woman was hurt.
“Vulkasin prepares to meet the northern packs. I suggest you prepare to meet your European cousins.”
“Those plans are in the works as we speak. Is there anything else you want to tell me, an alpha, I have to do?”
Sharia wobbled, as if Lucien’s words had hit her, knocking her off balance. Falon rushed to her side just as Lucien did. Gently, they set her down on a nearby chair. Falon glanced at Lucien and caught the flash of concern in his golden eyes when the elder grabbed his forearm for support. Then it was gone. But she had seen it. It proved once again that Lucien’s anger was full of hot air, manufactured to protect himself from—what? Being cast in his brother’s shadow?
Sharia shooed them away and said, “The Slayers are converging and the vipers are recruiting. We were stopped by two large groups of that scourge on motorcycles coming down the mountain road.”
Falon felt Lucien’s anger spark. “They are being managed here in the flatlands. Mondragon slew four Slayers in Lodi this morning, stripped them of their weapons, and confiscated the twenty-four AKs they had just taken possession of. We also cut off their major arms supplier. Another hunting party will leave at dusk, followed by another at dawn.”
“You will need more than a hunting party.”
Lucien swiped his hand across his face, a gesture of irritation. Falon hid a smile since he was so frequently irritated. It must be difficult being so angry at the world and dealing with such a subspecies as humans.
“With all due respect, niña, I have been killing Slayers and more recently vipers quite expeditiously. While my brother chooses to ride in like the cavalry, Mondragon prefers the more subtle guerilla approach.”
Niña?
Must you question everything?
Everything.
Mondragon roots are Basque. Niña is a Spanish term of endearment for aunt or godmother.
But you do not believe in God.
Not your Christian God.
I’m glad you showed her respect.
I’m glad you’re glad. Now can we get on with it?
Falon smiled but did not hide it this time. Sharia watched in fascinated silence. Apparently, Falon and Lucien had been so engrossed in their little mental convo, their expressions were as plain as if they had said it out loud.
The old woman looked directly at Falon, then at Lucien and frowned. Something ominous lurked behind her eyes. The hair on the back of Falon’s neck shot straight up.
“What?” Lucien asked.
Sharia looked behind her to Maleek and the handful of Amorak that had accompanied her. They nodded in unison.
“Now,” Sharia said quietly. “The real reason for our visit. Rafael is—not the same.”
Falon’s heart plummeted. “What do you mean?” she asked, stepping closer to the old woman. Please, God, let him be okay. She could not bear it if he was hurt or ill.
“I fear he is going mad.”
Falon gasped.
“Let him,” Lucien said flatly.
“No, Lucien!” Falon cried. “No! He is your brother! He is the man I love! Do not be so cruel and cavalier.”
Lucien’s face reddened furiously. Falon grabbed his hands. When he jerked them away, she grabbed them tighter. “Look at me, damn it!”
When he refused, she grabbed his chin and forced him to. “I know it hurts you that I love him. I’m sorry for that pain. I’m sorry for this whole damn mess! But I have chosen to stay with Mondragon. I will not betray your trust, Luca. I need you to believe that. Now, if you can, I need you to look past your emotions and see the world as it really is. You, me—” She swept her arm out to include Mondragon and Amorak. “Them. The entire nation needs Rafael alive and focused right now.”
Sharia nodded. “If Rafael does not recover, his loss will cripple the Lycan nation.”
“With the Eye of Fenrir on my hand, there will be no need for Rafael,” Lucien said flatly.
Falon was at her emotional edge. He was the most stubborn, prideful man alive. She grabbed his shirt and pleaded. “You’re wrong, Lucien! How do you think it will look to the nation if one of the premier alphas goes mad? It will send the message that if he cannot handle the pressure of this crisis, no one can!”
Lucien grasped her hands. “Maybe he can’t handle it.” He looked past Falon to the Amorak. “Did it occur to anyone that maybe the mighty golden alpha, Rafael Vulkasin, crashed and burned under the pressure?”
He turned back to Falon. His eyes softened. “I will not crash or burn. With the ring, Falon, and you by my side, we can lead the nation to victory!”
Mondragon nodded, loudly voicing their agreement.
“You are wrong, Lucien. It will take the power of the three,” Sharia said, looking directly at Lucien and then Falon. “Mondragon, Vulkasin, and the woman that stands between them. United. As one. It will be the only way to survive the wrath of Fenrir.”
“But the wolf is harmlessly contained in the ring,” Lucien challenged.
“He is now, but he howls to the Gods for release.”
“The lore says he can be released only by one pure of heart.”
Sharia nodded, and speared Lucien with a knowing stare. “And so he shall be.”
“I must go to Rafael,” Falon said pulling away from Lucien. “I can pull him back from the darkness.”
“No,” Lucien said emphatically.
Furious, Falon turned to him. “Why not?”
“Because you love him!” Lucien raged.
“Don’t be so thickheaded! This is beyond our personal feelings, Lucien! This is about survival,” Falon screamed, finally losing her patience. Yes, she would do anything for Rafael out of love. It would tear her apart to see him again, to touch him, to hold him in her arms knowing she could not return to him. But she would do it. Endure that pain because she did love him and damn it, she cared for Lucien, more than she would admit even to herself.
His vehemence matched hers. “I forbid it.”
Falon’s fury soared beyond the stratosphere. How dare he tell her what she could and could not do?
She was not a prisoner here nor was she a slave! Fighting with Lucien would do no good. It would only force him to dig in deeper. So she forced herself to an emotional place where she could release her frustration and try a different approach. Holding his stare, she blew several short cleansing breaths, then said, “Do the honorable thing, Lucien.”
“Honor is for fools!”
Fisting her hands to keep from smacking some sense into him, Falon lowered her voice and pleaded, “Then do it for the love you once had for your brother, your only living blood.”
“Love is for the weak,” he spat.
She moved into him, fighting her urge to punch him and her need to wrap her arms around him and soothe his wounded heart. “You are wrong.”
“Am I?” He grabbed her to him. His anger swirled in red tidal waves around him. “What has love gotten you but heartache?”
Her heart cracked a little more for this tormented man. His heart had been broken just as hers had. Even now, though he pretended not to care about her, he did. She felt it in everything he did, but especially in the way he touched her. And now, in the way he protested—because he feared she would not return to him. “Love has freed me, Lucien.”
“It holds you captive! Everything you do is for him!”
Falon nodded, admitting the truth. At least part of it. “I am here because of him. I submitted to you because of him. I stayed for—” You.
“You did not submit to me! I forced you the first time. And last night?” He laughed angrily. “Last night was—” He swiped his hand across his face and stared at Falon. “What was last night?”
Her heart cracked a little more. The turmoil etched on his face was tragic.
The truth did not lie. Falon’s belly quivered. No, the truth did not lie, and if she were honest with herself, last night had nothing to do with Rafael; it had everything to do with Lucien. She had wanted him. For herself. God help her, but she had. She owed Lucien that part of the truth.
“Last night was amazing, Lucien. I would not give it back for anything or anyone.” She touched his arm. “Blood does not lie. By bloodright I belong to you.”
She saw the hesitation in his eyes, felt it in his body. He wanted her, but would not settle for just a part of her. Deliberately, he removed her hand from his arm as if he could not stand her touch. “But your heart belongs to Rafael.”
“I will always love Rafael.” It was the simple truth. “But that does not mean I don’t care for you.”
His anger was terrifying. Falon stepped away from him as his fiery red aura blasted her and everyone around her. He turned from her and stalked to the front door.
“I stayed for you, Lucien!” Falon screamed, running after him. “Doesn’t that count for something?”
He yanked open the door and slammed it shut loudly behind him.
Stunned by her outburst, Falon stopped in her tracks. What had just happened? Why did she feel as if her heart was going through the shredder again, this time for Lucien? How could she have feelings for him when she loved his brother?
She turned and looked solemnly at Mondragon. She expected to see a refection of Lucien’s anger in their eyes, and while there was some, mostly she saw compassion. “I cannot unlove Rafael any more than Lucien could accept me loving them both.”
Talia stepped from behind Dax and approached Falon. “Lucien refuses to accept his heart is not as hard as he proclaims it to be.”
Falon’s anger spiked when she thought how Lucien’s anger infected not just his own heart but everyone’s. He was going to drive her to drink. Just when she started to believe Lucien had a heart, he shut down. Falon shook her head, wanting desperately to understand him. To comfort him. But she was beginning to wonder if he was capable of love at all. Not the love of lust, but the deep, all-encompassing love she shared with Rafa. The kind of love where if you had to, you would make the ultimate sacrifice. The sacrifice Rafael had made.
Falon looked at Lucien’s cousin. A piece of her heart crumbled as she foresaw Lucien’s future. “Lucien is filled with too much hatred. His bloodlust for vengeance eats at him like maggots on roadkill. They will devour his soul until there is nothing left.” Lucien, not Rafael, would be the lone wolf howling at the moon.
“He needs time to come to the realization that he must make peace with his brother,” Talia said softly. “Until he does, he will never accept your feelings for Rafa, because his anger will drive everything he does.”
“Lord only knows he won’t listen to reason from me,” Falon said. But that would not stop her from going after him. She wanted Lucien to know she cared even if he pushed her away again.
“His kind of anger is a by-product of traumatic pain,” Talia continued.
“He must have loved Mara very much,” Falon reflected aloud. The thought of Lucien loving another woman, Slayer or not, prickled her heart.
“Lucien’s pain began the day his parents were slain by Thomas Corbet. It flared out of control the day Rafael slew his chosen one, and then became unbearable when he and his brother fought to the brink of death.”
Falon’s heart cracked a little more for the troubled brother. She could not imagine the horror of what he had witnessed. His troubled heart cried out for relief. Falon took a step toward the door but stopped when warm hands grasped hers. Falon looked down into Sharia’s watery brown eyes. “His anger will destroy him if his pride does not. Only you can soothe his beast, Falon. Go to him and ease his pain before he does something he cannot recover from.”
“I will not soothe him with lies.” Though part of her wanted to soothe him at any cost. Even lies. She hated seeing Lucien hurt so. But she could not, would not change how she felt about Rafael.
“He was always the stubborn son. He could never see past his brother’s glory to recognize his own.” She squeezed Falon’s hands. “Only in truth is there freedom. Search for the truth in your heart for Lucien. When you discover it, tell him. Show him. Do not let him push you away.” She smiled a bittersweet smile. “He will try to push. Each time he does, hold on to him tighter, prove to him you will not abandon him, Falon. In the meantime, go to him, run with him, fight beside him.” Sharia gave Falon a little shove. “Hurry, there is no time to waste.”
As soon as Falon walked out the front door, she picked up Lucien’s wolf scent. He had shifted. She did the same and followed his scent northeast, toward Vulkasin.
Lucien was running hard. Much faster than Falon could run. His stride was longer and more powerful.
Lucien!
Leave me alone.
Talk to me!
Nothing to discuss.
Then slow down so that I can run with you.
I want to be alone.
She continued her reckless pace after him. Though Mondragon was in the middle of civilization, there was a trail through the back fence of the compound against the hill. There was no chance even in broad daylight for a human to be startled by the wolves. Even so, Falon was not familiar with the trail. Which really didn’t matter. As long as she had Lucien’s scent, she could find him anywhere.
After more than an hour chasing Lucien into the timberline, dodging Viper and Slayer scents, Falon caught up to him. He stood naked in his human form on the edge of a huge granite boulder overlooking the roaring rapids of the American River. Even at a distance, anger radiated off him. But she would have her say, then see her will done.
Falon shifted beside him.
“It’s dangerous out here,” he said.
“It’s dangerous everywhere.”
He turned and looked at her. “This area is crawling with Vipers, Falon. You shouldn’t have followed me.”
“You shouldn’t have run.”
He smiled tightly.
“Lucien, I need to speak with Rafael.”
His lips tightened to a thin line, before he said, “About what?”
Well, that was a little progress, he did not flat-out say no. Falon swallowed hard and picked her words carefully. “I think I can help hi
m through this thing that has ahold of his mind. But I feel as if I have to explain—”
“Explain what?” He grabbed her, digging his fingers into her shoulders. “That you want me? That you want me like a drug?” He shook her. “That you want me so much it scares you?”
Vehemently, Falon shook her head. “I want to reassure him of my love!”
Lucien’s eyes darkened dangerously. “So that he can be more miserable?”
“So he will come out of his dark place!”
Lucien nodded setting her from him. “Sure, go tell him how much you like my dick in you, then tell him how much you love him.”
Falon slapped him hard across the cheek. “Do not speak so crudely to me.”
He grabbed her to him, and again, despite his rage, his wounded pride, and the hour-long sprint, he was rock hard against her belly. “You infuriate me with your declarations of love. When will you get it through your head, you are Mondragon now!”
“I have gotten it through my head! When will you get it through your damn head that while I can love Rafael, I can also have feelings for you?”
He flung his hands from hers and stepped to the edge of the boulder. “Fuck feelings! I have had enough of feelings!” He slowly turned and levelly said, “You are mine, Falon. Mine! That is never going to change. Ever.”
“Lucien, I accept I am Mondragon now. I am simply saying, for Rafael’s sake, and for my peace of mind, I want to go to him. And I’m not asking.”
“You would defy me for another man?”
“I would defy you for myself.”
For what seemed like an endless hour, Lucien stood ramrod straight and stared at her. The afternoon sunshine speared through the high pine, repelling off his golden skin. A slight film of sweat covered his body, emphasizing the definition of his muscles and the detail of his wolf and dragon tattoo. Falon did not dare look down. She knew his dragon was primed and ready.
She was not unaffected by the magnificent sight of him in all his naked glory standing in a halo of sunshine. Lucien was as male as male could be, and her female was as aware of that fact as it was that the sun rose every day.
He pointed to the smooth granite beneath their feet. “Lay down.”
