Love's Sacrifice

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Love's Sacrifice Page 5

by Ancelli


  “Come in,” Shon answered with her back turned to him.

  “Senior Chief Blake.”

  He must have startled her, because the papers she had in her hands hit the floor. She bent down, retrieved them, turned in her leather chair, and stared at him. “Good morning, Lieutenant Commander Mitchell.”

  Cody stayed in the same house, but he hardly spoke to Shon. They had little contact since he’d looked through the albums. All three of them would sit down every night to have dinner, that’s where the conversation between them ended. She would help Michele clean up the kitchen then excuse herself, giving him time to get to know his daughter. He had to admit he was still fucking angry at Shon; she kept his child away from him, and that wasn’t something he could easily get over. He still loved her and wanted a future with her and Michele, but he needed more time to work through her betrayal.

  “Good morning.” He closed the door behind him once he crossed the threshold. “Why didn’t you tell me Michele was having a father, daughter thing at the youth center today?”

  Shon arched her eyebrow. “I didn’t know. She didn’t mention it to me.”

  He sat down in the chair in front her desk and entwined his fingers. “She asked me this morning.”

  Shon lowered her head, not being able to meet his eyes. He could tell she was still nervous around him, maybe of what he would say.

  “I told her I would always be there whenever she needed me.” He gazed at Shon. “And the first thing she asked me, I had to decline. I feel like shit.”

  Shon pushed back in her seat. “Welcome to my world.”

  “Huh?”

  “Cody, do you know how many birthdays I’ve missed?”

  “How many?” He really wanted to know.

  “I’ve missed five of her birthdays, because I was either on duty, out to sea, or on deployment.” She scratched her head. “I missed so many special occasions, like recitals, dances, plays, things that mean so much to a little girl. Thanksgiving and even Christmas.” Her eyes watered. “It’s the sacrifice we made when we decided to serve our country.”

  “I’m sorry you have to sacrifice your time with our daughter.” He couldn’t imagine how it would feel not being there when she would need him the most. The tone in Shon’s voice let him know she still hurt for all the times she had to leave Michele.

  “Now, I’m home.” She wiped at her eyes. “I’ve been with her without leaving going on three years, and I love every second of it.” She looked away from him. “I get to see her grow into a beautiful young lady. It hurts having someone else raise your baby when you’re gone, to see the effect your choices make on your family. Thank God my mom was here when I wasn’t. I don’t think I could’ve made it if it wasn’t for her.”

  “Remind me to thank Mrs. Irene.”

  She gave him a genuine smile. “I will.”

  He stared at her. “Why didn’t you get out?”

  “To what, Cody?” She leaned forward. “All I have is an associate’s degree.”

  “Shon, you would get hired based on your Navy experience; you’re a Senior Chief, that’s way up the enlisted chain, almost at the very top,” he stated in a firm voice.

  “Cody…” she whispered. “Do you know how much it means to me that I made it this far as a single mother, as a woman period?” Tears started falling down her beautiful, brown cheeks. “I never thought I would make it past First Class and look at me now. I have made my daughter proud. I know we missed out on a lot of things and people judge me because of it. Though, they don’t know what’s in my heart. I am proud to serve in the US Navy, and I am also proud to be a mother. As a woman, I can have both, and I accomplished what I set out to do. We—as women and African Americans—have come so far in the military and the civilian world. If I quit now, then why did I make all those sacrifices?” She stood. “Cody … I made a mistake, a horrible mistake, keeping her from you. I dug a hole and every time I wanted to get out, it got deeper. One year turned to twelve years, and when I saw you in the club, I told myself, this is it… tell him, but one thing turned into another, and once again we ended up in bed together.”

  “And?”

  “I was afraid.” Shon watched out the window.

  “With good reason.” Cody rose. After listening to her, he now understood. In his eyes she was a great mother. She did what she did for her family. “I know how I get when I’m angry. I don’t want to talk; I throw stuff. Still in this case, I think you should’ve made the exception. Michele needed me all those months you were away. Maybe she could’ve been with me.”

  “What if you were away too?”

  He hadn’t thought about that. She was right, being a parent in the military wasn’t going to be easy.

  “I did what I thought was best, and in the end, it wasn’t.” She twisted around, observing him. “I know this is hard, but can you please forgive me?” Shon finally looked into his eyes.

  Cody wanted to wrap his arms around her to console her, but they were one, in uniform and secondly, in her office.

  “Shon, I’m going to be honest with you. Right now, I can’t forgive you.” He marched up to her and wiped at her tears with his finger. Leaning down and kissing her was not an option. “I promise I’m working on it. You gave me a beautiful, intelligent daughter, and that’s a start.” He stepped back from her. “I love you, and dammit I still want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone.”

  Shon just stood there, watching him with shiny eyes.

  “Senior Chief.” Someone opened the door without knocking and entered her office.

  “IT1 Brown! How many times have I told you, if the freaking door is closed, knock!” she yelled at the sailor.

  IT1 studied Cody and then Shon, shaking her head and was about to turn around.

  “What was it?” Shon’s voice became louder.

  “Lieutenant Barkley needed your assistance.” She smirked, gazing at Cody. “I can tell him you’re busy doing someone else.”

  “Excuse me!” Now it was Cody who raised his voice. “What did you just say?”

  “I apologize, Sir.” Petty Officer Brown’s voice rattled. “What I meant to say was, I can tell him you are in a meeting with someone else.”

  “That won’t be necessary. I will be right out,” Shon responded coldly.

  “IT1 Brown,” Cody read her nametag. “Next time, think about what you’re going to say before it leaves your mouth.”

  “Yes, Sir.” She rushed over to the door, “Excuse me,” and gently closed it.

  “She hates me.” Shon picked up a pen and pad. “I made Chief, and then Senior Chief before her. I’ve tried to help her, but she refuses to listen to me, doing the opposite of what I advise; she just does things her way. I can’t help the unwilling.”

  “Well that’s stupid.” He moved out of her way so she could walk to the exit. “If she wanted it as bad as you did, she would be a chief or senior chief by now.”

  Shon smiled. “You always find a way to make me feel better.” She opened the door and strolled out with her head held high.

  ***

  Cody strolled up to the Youth Center and was caught off guard when he saw Michele sitting on the stairs with her arms around her bent knees, her head down, and a counselor sitting next to her.

  The woman patted his daughter on her back. “Stop whining and come back in.”

  Michele nodded her head.

  “Michele,” Cody called out, making the counselor look his way, and his little girl peered up with red-rimmed eyes. “What’s wrong?”

  “Dad!” Michele jumped up and ran into his arms, hugging him. “You came.” Her grip got tighter. “You came.”

  Cody’s heart flittered when she called him dad, hugging her back. “You invited me right?” He chuckled softly.

  “But you said you weren’t coming,” she said against his chest.

  “You come first.” He pulled her away, gazing into her red, blood shot eyes. “Why were you crying?”

  The couns
elor stood, observing his uniform and rank. She extended her hand. “Good Morning, Sir. I’m Susan, one of Michele’s summer teachers here.”

  He shook her hand. “Hi, Susan. I’m Michele’s dad, Cody.” He released her hand and took Michele’s hand in his.

  He could tell Susan was uneasy when he grabbed his daughters hand in his. “I’m sorry Sir, but I haven’t seen you before. I didn’t know she had…” She watched Michele, not finishing her sentence. “She’s been coming to this center for years.”

  Cody sighed, staring at the lady. Was she really going to say she didn’t know Michele had a father? How the hell does that happen—sperm, egg, fertilize. He understood the woman was doing her job by making sure he was who he said he was, but she was going about it the wrong way. Right now, he wanted to know why his daughter was upset. “Michele, why were you crying?”

  Michele finally smiled, beaming up at him. “Because I wanted you here today. Most of the kids have their dads here. I wanted to show off my awesome dad for once.”

  Cody’s heart swelled, and his smile couldn’t get any bigger. “Well, I’m here now, and I want to show off my amazing daughter.”

  “Sir, are you on the list of family members or friends that can pick her up?” Susan crossed her arms over her chest. “I can’t just let anyone have contact with our kids.”

  “Ms. Susan, this is my dad.” Michele took a possessive stance in front of Cody. She dug in her back pocket and grabbed her cell. “I’m calling my mom.”

  “Michele, you don’t have to call Shon.” Cody started marching up the stairs.

  “Sir, you can’t enter the premises.”

  Cody stopped, turning around to meet her stare. “Instead of asking me all these questions, why don’t you ask me for my ID and go check to see if I am on the list?”

  The lady’s lips thinned, and she rushed past him up the stairs.

  “If I said yes, are you just going let me in without verifying who I am?” Cody twisted around and continued toward the double doors.

  “Good morning, Cody.” Crystal smiled as they entered the center.

  “Hey, Crystal,” Cody replied.

  “You see, Michele, your dad made it after all.” Crystal touched Michele’s arm.

  Susan watched Crystal’s interaction with Cody. “You know him?” she asked, surprised.

  “Yes, this is Michele’s dad.” Crystal began writing in a note pad she had in her hand. “Shon introduced us weeks ago. Why, is there a problem?”

  “No, there’s no issue, Crystal.” Cody swiped the card the youth center had given him when Shon signed him in as Michele’s dad. At the center, every time you dropped off or picked up a kid, the adult needed to swipe their card. Susan looked at the card in his hand. “Susan didn’t know Michele had a father,” he said with sarcasm in his tone.

  “What!” Crystal arched her eyebrows, looking at the blonde lady.

  “Sir, you could’ve just told me.”

  “Ma’am, you were rude to my child and me.” Michele pulled his hand. “I will be complaining.”

  “Dad, come on.” She guided him down the hallway. “They are about to start the father, kids dance challenge.” She giggled. “I hope you can dance.”

  “Oh, baby girl, your daddy has moves,” he chuckled.

  “We’ll see.” She smiled up at him, opening the door to the lunchroom.

  Music blasted from the center speakers. They’d turned the lunch area to a dance hall. All the chairs and tables were pushed to the side of the room. There was a disco ball hanging from the ceiling. The boys and their fathers were on the far right, standing by, and the girls and their fathers were in the middle of the floor, getting ready to dance.

  “Come on, Dad, they’re about to start.” Michele guided him to the front of the other girls.

  “Dads … and daughters…” Crystal yelled into the mic. “Are you ready to wobble?”

  “Yes!” Michele giggled, jumping up and down, clapping her hands with the other girls.

  Everyone lined up when the music began playing. Michele started dancing next to him. She moved her hips from side to side, jumping forward, and she shook her body before jumping back. Michele stepped to the right, left, and then back. “Dad…” She stopped dancing, looking at him. “You don’t know how to wobble?”

  Cody smiled and jumped in, following the group to the right, left, and then back. He added swag with every step he took, dropping it low, swaying from side to side. He doubled stepped, making his little girl laugh as she followed his lead. They were laughing and having fun. She turned to the side, and they continued the dance routine. Michele’s smile made this all worth it. He didn’t realize how much he needed her in his life. He had everything a man his age wanted, except a family, and now they were at his fingertips, and he would do everything in his power to hold on to them.

  The song ended. “Dad, you were great. How did you learn to dance like that?”

  “Friends.”

  “Black friends…” Michele giggled.

  “Yes,” he chuckled.

  “Ms. Linda,” Michele called out.

  A young brunette in her twenties walked over to them. “Hi, Michele.”

  “Ms. Linda, this is my dad.” Michele looked up at him. “Dad, this is Ms. Linda

  Cody extended his hand and shook hers. “Hi, Linda.” She was a tall, beautiful woman, and she wore her long hair in a ponytail. Linda smiled, showing her pearly whites.

  “Hi, Michele’s dad.” Linda’s hazel eyes sparkled as she chuckled.

  “Oh, I’m sorry, it’s Cody.”

  “This is my craft teacher, Dad.” Michele kept glancing over at the doors. “She keeps me busy.”

  Cody stared at his daughter. She was up to something, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. It seemed like she was trying to get him to notice her teacher in a much too friendly way.

  “Dance With My Father,” by Luther Vandross, began playing. He took Michele’s hand in his. “Excuse us… May I have this dance?”

  “Yes, Dad.” Michele beamed.

  “It was nice meeting you.” Linda walked away. She was too skinny for his liking.

  Cody wrapped his hands around his little girl’s waist, and they swayed from side to side. “What are you up to?”

  She covered her mouth, laughing. “Nothing.”

  “Are you sure?” He took her hand, spinning her around. He would cherish this moment for a lifetime. Michele was beautiful, and her curls bounced as he spun her again; her laughter made his heart smile. He was so proud of her, and he couldn’t wait to tell the rest of his family and friends about her. Barkley was surprised but happy for him. He sent pictures to his parents and siblings. His brother and his son video chatted with Michele, and his mom and sister called her every day.

  “Dad.” She stared up at him with those mesmerizing eyes.

  “Yes.”

  “I was trying to make mom jealous,” she admitted with a sly nod.

  “Huh…”

  “Oops…” She looked over to her right. “You didn’t know mom was here.”

  “What?” He peered around the room and saw Shon standing in her khaki uniform with her arms crossed over her chest.

  Michele cocked her eyebrow. “Mom needs a push in the right direction.”

  Cody shook his head.

  “Please forgive her.” They danced, swaying to the music. “Dad, she made a mistake. I was mad too when grandma told me, but I love her. We all make bad choices.”

  “Sweetheart, she kept you from me. I missed out on so much.” He touched her cheek.

  “I did too. She loves us both.” She sighed. “Do you love my mom?”

  “Yes…” he answered honestly, staring at Shon. She was attractive even in uniform; her hair was pulled back in a tight bun, no make-up.

  “This song used to make me cry, but now that I have you, it makes me smile.” She held on to the side of his camouflage blouse. “This is the beginning of our memories together, Dad.”

&
nbsp; “Yes it is, sweetie,” Cody voice cracked with emotions. “To memories.” He stopped dancing, dug in his pocket, pulled out his cell, and then took pictures of them together.

  The song ended, and Michele ran over to her mom. Cody followed her. “Mom… what are you doing here?” she asked, excited.

  “Cody said he couldn’t make it.” She glared at him. “So I wanted to be here for you.”

  “Awe thank you, Mommy.” She hugged her. “That’s so sweet.”

 

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