He walked up to the girls’ cabana, moving quietly. He felt like a stalker. Morgan had pulled it off, and Penelope was alone. She was lying on her belly, dozing on the chaise, and her e-reader had fallen closed beside her. Her sun-streaked, wheat-colored hair was spread over her shoulders and screened her face. He stripped off his jeans and sat down beside her. He gently gathered her hair over her shoulder. He picked up the bottle of sunscreen and squeezed some into his hands. He let the liquid warm to his skin temperature and began to massage it into her back and shoulders.
Penelope groaned as his hands coasted down her back to her butt. She did have a great butt. He shook his head. Thoughts like that had gotten him into enough trouble already. She was still asleep. He closed his eyes and whispered, “What am I going to do about us, baby? I love you so much. I don’t know how to fix all this crazy emotion and hurt feelings.” She didn’t move, and he thought she hadn’t heard him. Thank goodness for small favors.
Then she mumbled, “I think you should just leave well enough alone before I actually find that hit man I’ve been trying to hire.”
“You wouldn’t really do that, baby. You know you love me.”
“Do not bet your life on it, Fairlamb. What are you doing here?”
“Making sure my woman doesn’t get a sunburn. What else?”
“I’m not your woman. I haven’t been your woman in five years.”
“That’s just not true, baby. You never stopped being my woman, and you never will. It’s just a fact of life, so get over it. Penelope Wilson is Jay Fairlamb’s woman, girlfriend, sub, love of his life. I wish I could add wife to that list.”
“You’re impossible.” She rolled over and looked into his eyes. Her sparkling green eyes were snapping with aggravation. He wished she could see into his head, his heart. Then she’d know that he wasn’t bullshitting. She was the only woman for him.
* * * *
Penelope didn’t know if she could hold it together. She had to get his big, strong, tan hands off her body before she lost the last shred of willpower she had. She had almost decided to play possum and just hold those words in her heart, but her smart mouth had gotten the better of her as usual.
God, he was beautiful. The sun was glinting off the highlights in his dark hair and on the thin trail of chest hair running down his abdomen and under the waistband of his swim trunks. They weren’t tight or skimpy, but she could see the outline of his hard cock under the fabric. His blue eyes sparkled when he looked at her. It was just too much.
Penelope climbed off the lounge and walked toward the tiled coping at the edge of the pool. She needed to cool off. He got up and followed her. When he came up behind her and his hands just naturally gravitated to her butt, she pivoted, bent, and rolled him over her shoulder and into the water with a huge splash. When he sputtered to the surface shaking the water out of his eyes, she said, “Fairlamb, you have been warned. Leave me alone.”
“You’re going to eat those words, Wilson. Let me know if you want ’em with hot sauce.”
“In your dreams, cowboy.” She headed back to the chaise lounge.
“Absolutely, woman. You’ve been in my dreams for five years.”
* * * *
Jay climbed out of the pool, walked over to her, and shook off some droplets of cool water onto her sun-warmed, tan body before he turned and headed to the tiki bar without another word. It was really too early for a beer, but as the song said, it was five o’clock somewhere. She had gotten him good that time. Jordan would laugh his head off. Shit. The woman never failed to surprise him. When had she learned moves like that?
He was sipping his beer when a dark-haired man dressed in tan Dockers and a white knit shirt with the Black Dahlia logo on the pocket stepped up beside him at the bar and extended his hand. “Dane Dunross, manager of The Black Dahlia. Security advised me that there might be a problem. Is everything okay here?”
“Hell, no. Want a beer?”
“I’ve got time if you want to talk. What was that all about?”
“Do you have a few hours?” Jay shook his head and sighed. “I have fucked up the best thing in my life, and I’m trying to make it right without too much luck—actually, with no luck.” Jay gave Dane the short version.
“Jesus H. Christ. We just opened on Christmas, and already this place is a fucking soap opera. It’s one fucking drama after another, blackmailers, stalkers, now unrequited lovers. What the fuck is next? I don’t know if I can keep up. Please don’t give me any more drama to deal with.”
“That’s not my intention.”
“Your girl has some moves, I’ll give her that. That was neatly done. Actually, Security captured it on video if you want a copy.”
“Yeah. I had no idea. Apparently, it’s a new skill. Things are never boring with Penelope.” His shoulders slumped. “I don’t know if I can fix this, Dunross. She’s just not listening.”
“I can sympathize. I did a stupid thing a couple of years ago, and I’m still living with the consequences. Only, I had to hire my mistake as the event planner for the hotel. Have you seen the gorgeous platinum blonde walking around the hotel, usually in a suit? Katina Rensakova.”
“I think I saw her at the front desk when I checked in. She’s a looker. Tall, elegant, restrained.”
“Well, we had a D/s relationship for about six months a couple years ago. It got pretty intense. She was an excellent sub, but I knew she wanted more than I was prepared to give at the time. I was too young and still had a lot to learn.”
“Exactly. And some growing up to do.”
“So I thought it would be best to end the relationship before it got even more complicated. I hurt her badly, although I didn’t mean to, and I didn’t know it at the time. Sometimes I have…regrets. I try not to dwell on it, but with her in the hotel every day now, it’s getting harder and harder. She makes me feel like a fucking puppy-kicker.”
Jay laughed. “Exactly. Me too. I just can’t win. I’m still paying the price for that ménage mistake, and I never even touched the woman. After Pen walked out on me that day, I lost the urge, so to speak. I sent her on her way and never called her again.”
“Does she know that?”
“Probably not. We haven’t exactly been communicating since then.”
“Maybe you should tell her. It might make a difference.” Dane finished his beer, stuck his hand out and shook Jay’s hand. “Good luck. Just don’t do anything else stupid.”
“Working on it.”
* * * *
Penelope watched the two handsome men at the tiki bar. She thought the one wearing Dockers and a shirt was the hotel manager. It was good to know their security was on top of things. She had to turn away. She didn’t want Jay to see her giggling—no laughing out loud, no belly-clutching “ROFLMAO hilarious” laughing out loud. That had been the most satisfying thing she had ever done. The look on his face when he’d sputtered to the surface was priceless. He’d think twice about coming up behind her again, not that she planned to give him the chance.
The manager walked away, and she could feel Jay’s eyes stopping to land on her as his gaze swept the pool area. She made a conscious effort to ignore him. She wished the girls would get back. He finished his beer, left a bill on the bar and headed back in her direction. Oh, no.
“I’ve got some work to do, and I’m going back upstairs, so you can relax for now.” He reached down and patted her butt. “This isn’t over, Pen. We have to talk. Will you have dinner with me tonight?” He held up both of his hands before she could answer. “Just dinner. No strings. Please?” He looked so earnest. Shit. He was impossible to resist. Those fucking dimples.
“I guess it is time we talked like adults. Just dinner. No dungeon. No scene.” Maybe it was time to talk to Jay like an adult woman and not run away. She felt the dread and excitement course through her body at the same time.
“I’ll come to the suite at seven. Do you want to eat at the hotel or would you like to go someplace else? I h
aven’t been offsite since I got here.”
“Someplace else would be good—maybe neutral territory.”
“I’ll ask at the front desk for a suggestion. See you at seven.” He picked up his jeans and walked away.
* * * *
Morgan and Kathi came back to the cabana, and they ordered sandwiches and tall iced teas for lunch. “That lazy river thing is great. Very relaxing. You should try it.”
“I tossed Jay over my shoulder into the pool. You should have seen the look on his face. Those self-defense classes I took came in very handy.”
“Oh, Pen. I would have loved to see that.” Kathi had a grin on her face a mile wide. “Think you can do it again while we watch?”
“Probably not. He’d be ready for me if I tried the same move again. I agreed to go out to dinner with him tonight.” Penelope huffed and frowned at Morgan. “Don’t look so happy. It’s just dinner. Nothing else. I guess we really do need to talk like grown-ups.”
This was a good sign. Maybe Penelope and Jay could work it out if Jay didn’t do anything else stupid. Morgan knew this was the right thing for them. She had thought so all along. She settled back in the chaise and picked up a magazine to hide behind. She didn’t want to gloat and possibly jinx the whole thing.
Penelope was putting on the finishing touches in her bathroom when Jay knocked at the door. Morgan hurried over to answer it. She pushed him back out into the hall and pulled the door almost closed behind her. “Jay. I wanted a private word with you. This is your one chance. I mean it. Your one chance. Do. Not. Fuck. It. Up. If you want Pen back, you have to make this count. No macho bullshit. She’s not disposed to be reasonable in the first place.”
“I know, Morgan. I’m going to do my best to keep the bullshit meter from exploding.” Now he looked insulted.
She gave him a quick hug. “I’m not ragging on you. I know this is important to you and Penelope, too. I want it to work out almost as much as you do.”
* * * *
When Penelope came out into the living room, Jay was sitting on the sofa with Morgan. She watched his eyes light when he took in the short, snug black cocktail dress and red-soled Christian Louboutin high-heels. Kathi was giving him the fisheye while she waited for Jesse. They had plans to go out to a rodeo and then to do some Texas two-stepping at a County-Western Bar out west, in some little town called Davie. Apparently, it was the Florida version of cowboy country.
Jay stood up when she came into the room. “Hey, Penelope. Ready? The front desk recommended a steakhouse called Morrisons. I rented a car today. I should have done that when I got here, but I was otherwise occupied.”
“Yes, let’s go. See you later guys. Have fun, Kath. And Morgan, don’t burn out your cell phone with another marathon call to Eric.” Morgan had the good grace to blush.
Penelope turned to Jay, and he took her arm possessively. She tried to gently shake him loose, but no soap. She gave in gracefully, and they left the suite and walked down the hall. Once they were in the elevator Jay said, “You look great in that dress. I would love to take if off you. I’m doing my damn best not to kiss you senseless and rip it off right here and now, but I’m sure they have surveillance in the elevators.”
“That is no way to start a responsible adult conversation about our relationship.”
“I know. That’s why I’m trying so hard.”
A black Mercedes convertible with the top down was waiting under the portico outside the hotel lobby. Jay helped her in and buckled her seat belt. “I can do that for myself you know.”
“I know. I just wanted to do it for you.”
Ughh. She should have expected that. Jay had always been a gentleman about opening doors, standing up when a lady entered the room, and things like that. His Momma had made sure her rough-and-tumble cowboy sons had manners. Penelope giggled to herself. And that couldn’t have been easy.
“And don’t think I haven’t figured out why you wanted to go out for dinner. You wanted me at a nice place where you think I won’t make a scene and where I can’t just get up and walk back to the suite.”
“Guilty. I want this chance to talk to you uninterrupted and without your girls in the background. This is very important to me, Penelope, and I think to you as well.”
She wouldn’t admit it to him, but it was important to her. She had wondered for all these years why she hadn’t been enough for Jay, wondered what critical component of personality or body she had been missing that had made him want to bring another woman into their relationship.
They pulled into the parking lot of the JDB Building and a valet came to open her door, while another took Jay’s keys. They went inside the restaurant. Penelope watched as he spoke to the maître d’ about their reservation. Jay looked handsome in a dark-gray pinstripe suit with a black dress shirt open at the neck. The man was seriously delicious. She caught several women waiting with their dates or husbands for their tables giving him the hungry eye. She just grinned. Some things never changed. Apparently, the hotel concierge who had made their reservation had specified “white-glove treatment,” and they didn’t have to wait for their table.
Once they were seated and had ordered cocktails, a Cosmo for her and a bourbon-and-branch for him, Jay seemed to relax. She, on the other hand, was on high alert. She knew just how devastating he could be when he turned on the charm.
“Penelope, first, let me just sincerely apologize for what happened between us that weekend at the lake. I should have discussed a ménage with you beforehand. That was my mistake, and I take full responsibility for it. I still had some growing up to do.” He took a swallow of his drink, as if for courage or a moment to think, and then continued. “I want you to know I thought I was doing something for both of us. It’s true, I had wanted to give ménage a try, but I didn’t want to do it without you. I’ve missed you every single day of the last five years. Pen, I never slept with Maria Hernandez, either before that day or after. When you left, after I got over being pissed and I realized what I had done, I just sent her home and never called her again.”
“Really. So, you never slept with her? It was something new for both of us to try. Why do I not believe that?” Hmm. “So, you would be okay if we tried a male-female-male ménage together? You, me, and another man?”
“No! Of course not. That’s not what I said.”
“So it’s still all about you and your fantasy, and not about what I might want. See? New day, new suit, same old Jay.”
“Please, Pen, be reasonable. Let’s just take that whole ménage concept off the table. I realized it was a mistake from the get-go, not just that I didn’t discuss it with you first, but the whole idea. It might be good for another couple, but not for us.”
“Oh, but I’m intrigued with this idea now.” She could see his temper beginning to bubble to the surface. She had him right where she wanted him. “The only way I’ll agree to scene with you again is in a male-female-male ménage.”
His face was beginning to get red. He put his glass down with more force than was necessary. He wasn’t saying anything, but the expression on his face was murderous.
She just looked at him and let him simmer. Then she continued. “How to you like it, Jay? Do you like the thought of some other man’s hands on my body? Of my coming for some other man?” Now it looked like he was about to have a stroke. “That’s how I felt when you suggested that woman who was at the cabin should be part of our relationship. Part of what we’d had together for a year. Part of the love I felt for you.”
Oblivious to the tension at the table, a waiter materialized beside Jay. “Are you ready to order, sir?”
“No. Come back later,” he growled. The waiter scurried off. Jay had a seriously scary look on his face.
“There’s no reason to bite the poor man’s head off. I’m ready to order. I’ll have the filet with asparagus and mushrooms.”
“Filet? Asparagus? Have you seriously lost your mind?”
“Calm down, Jay. Think before yo
u say something you can’t take back. We should order our dinners and eat like civilized people.”
* * * *
Jay took a deep breath and another swallow of his drink. He didn’t feel like a civilized person, but he could feel the blood and red haze behind his eyes beginning to recede. She was right about that. He had to get a grip. Morgan had warned him not to fuck it up, and he had been about to do just that. Deep breaths.
She had gotten to him in a big way. Just the thought of another man’s hands on her, making her come, made him nuts. Was that really how she had felt when he’d suggested Maria Hernandez join them in bed? If so, he didn’t know what to do. Would words ever be enough? He had nothing else to offer. He had to try.
“I had everything, Pen, and I fucked it up. I let you leave. There was no way to fix it. You wouldn’t listen, and you wouldn’t take me back. I was young—maybe not so young—and definitely stupid, and I let curiosity and a wandering dick ruin the best thing in my life. I want you back, Penelope. I’ll do whatever I have to do to prove to you that I’ve changed, grown up. I love you, baby. I always have and I always will.”
Penelope picked up a fork and began to play with it. Was she planning to stab him with it? She seemed to be thinking. That could be good or bad.
* * * *
Penelope knew her heart was leaning toward listening to what he had to say while her mind was telling her to run like the devil was after her. Did she bear some responsibility for this whole cluster-fuck? She had wondered before what was lacking in her that he would seek out another woman. Was she really submissive, or had she just been playing at it? Had she ever seriously submitted to Jay way back when, or had she been deceiving him and herself? Had she driven him to need someone else? Was it all his fault? Or did she bear some small responsibility?
Penelope's Gift [The Black Dahlia Hotel 4] (Siren Publishing LoveEdge) Page 10
