The Blacker House

by Nicole Mulloy

  “I didn’t say I was going to send in the application. I said I would think about it.”

  “Oh,” she said, trying to remember the conversation.

  “You know, transferring colleges is a really big hassle, sweetie. I don’t know if Marshall will accept my credits. Then, everything I’ve done so far this year would be for nothing.”

  “Oh,” she said again, feeling like a stupid little girl. “So, where does that leave us?”

  “What do you mean?” he asked, some alarm in his face now.

  “If you’re not going to transfer here, then what’s our future? I mean, do we long-distance date forever? That seems silly.” Her heart fluttered wildly in her chest. She hadn’t anticipated having such a conversation this afternoon and she suddenly felt panicked and hot. She took off her jacket and laid it on the back of her chair.

  “I’m not saying that I won’t transfer here. I just haven’t really got a chance to work on it yet, Kate.” He smiled at her and reached across the table to grab her hand. “Don’t worry. We’ll be together someday. Even if I don’t transfer here, you could always go to Nebraska with me when you graduate next year.”

  “Next year?” she wailed. “It’s more like a year and a half. I can’t wait that long to be with you. I don’t just want to bring you to this dance, Jacob. I want to bring you to all of my high school dances. What about the prom, Jacob?”

  “I’ll come back for the prom.”

  “That’s not the point, really.” She started to go on, but the waitress arrived with their food. Kate waited patiently while she set out their food, ketchup, napkins. It seemed to take forever.

  “What I’m saying is, that I don’t want to be your long-distance girlfriend. I just want to be your girlfriend.” She looked at him with great intent, waiting for the answer she wanted to hear.

  He nodded at her. “We’ll figure it out, Kate” he said.

  That wasn’t the answer she wanted to hear. He let go of her hand and took a big bite of his sandwich. Ranch dressing oozed out of the side of his mouth. “This sandwich is delicious!” he said, his mouth full.

  “Uh-huh,” Kate said, her stomach twisted up into knots. She tried to let it go. We’ll figure it out, she repeated in her head. What does that mean? She took a bite of her sandwich. It really was delicious, despite her sour mood.

  “So, what time is the dance tomorrow?” he asked, finally wiping his mouth.

  “Seven o’clock. Did you bring your suit?” She felt relieved to be on a different topic.

  “Yup. Although, I can’t believe I’m going to a high school dance,” he said.

  “What do you mean, ‘I can’t believe I’m going to a high school dance.’ It’s not like you’re thirty-two. You just graduated last year!” Kate said with a chuckle.

  “I know, I’m just used to college life, you know. Parties, hanging out in clubs and stuff like that. Going to a high school dance is kind of lame for me.” He smiled one of his dazzling smiles, but Kate felt insulted.

  “Yeah, I’m still in high school,” she said, “and, yeah, it might be a little lame, but come on...you’ll be there with me. Isn’t that enough?”

  “God, you’re grouchy today. I’m just kidding. It’ll be a lot of fun, Kate.” He went back to his sandwich.

  Kate stared at him. Why was he acting like this? This wasn’t the Jacob she remembered, or that she’d been dreaming about. For the second time in two days, Kate tried to forgive him. She didn’t want to ruin this wonderful weekend. Maybe she was just being overly-sensitive.

  “So, who’s this guy that’s taking Lucy?” Jacob asked.

  “Oh, he’s a friend of mine, actually. His name is Chris. He’s pretty cool. You’ll like him.” She took a bite of a French fry. “He’s going to pick all of us up tomorrow.”

  “Oh, okay,” he said and dug back into his food. Kate debated going into the rest of the story, about her being upset at Chris for asking her little sister, but just didn’t feel like talking right now. He was quiet too. She felt a pang of worry deep in her belly as they finished off their dinners. It seemed neither of them had anything to say.

  *

  Saturday morning blazed with brilliant autumn sunshine, so Matt, Kate and Jacob went to the park. Matt always played a pickup soccer game on Saturday mornings, so he invited Jacob to join him. Matt played with a bunch of rowdy guys from Iran who somehow ended up in West Virginia. Kate, who was only an average soccer player and an unenthusiastic one at that, watched Jacob and Matt play. Matt’s girlfriend and her twin sister, (Kate could never figure out which one was officially the girlfriend), sat next to her on a plaid blanket.

  “Jacob is so cute, Kate,” one of the twins said.

  “Oh, thanks. I’m just so happy that he’s here. I’ve missed him so much,” she said and smiled weakly at them, searching for the tell-tale mole which would indicate which one was actually the girlfriend, Marcy.

  “Yeah, super cute,” said the other twin. Kate gave up trying to tell them apart. “He’s in college and you’re just in high school?”

  “Uh-huh. I’m a junior.” Just in high school?

  “Wow, that’s so cool,” said one, staring at the soccer game.

  “Yeah, so cool,” said the other.

  Kate stared at the two girls, trying to decide why Matt liked them, or one of them, anyway. Tired of the vapid conversation, Kate leaned back on the blanket and looked at the towering trees around her. Huge trees, exploding with autumn color.

  Her old house in Nebraska sat on a rolling prairie, surrounded by miles of corn fields. It was a great spot for watching sunsets and the intense thunderstorms that shook the area every summer. She even got to see a tornado one night. As the Gilberts cowered in the basement, Dad gazed out of the tiny window, watching the storm. He spotted the twister along the horizon. He held each of his children up to the window so they could see it. With every lightning strike, the sky would light up, exposing the black twister snaking across the prairie. Chunks of debris flew through the air. Kate was awed and horrified at the same time.

  Despite the occasional threat of tornadoes, Nebraska was a beautiful place. The summers burned dry and hot, and the autumns were warm and balmy. All winter long, the Nebraska winds blew bitter cold air, so cold that, if you threw a bucket of water into the air, it would freeze by the time it hit the ground. That cold. The snow would get so deep, they could dig tunnels though it. But it was all worth it in the spring, when the prairie pushed up flowers of all colors and the birds flew north in formations, low, right over their house.

  It was always an adventure. But as beautiful as Nebraska was, it certainly wasn’t the best spot for seeing autumn foliage. Kate had never seen an autumn like this. West Virginia exploded with color. The trees were enormous, the biggest she had ever seen. And from top to bottom, they glowed with yellows, oranges, reds, browns and greens. It was breathtaking. Kate lay back on the blanket and soaked in the beauty.

  There was a sudden outburst from the field. Kate sat up. Every time someone scored a goal, there was a heated argument. Matt said that the Iranians took their soccer very seriously. He wasn’t kidding, Kate thought, as the argument grew fierce. Always there to play the peacemaker, Matt tried to settle them down. Jacob stood to the side, watching nervously, as Matt negotiated the latest treaty.

  Kate stared at Jacob. He was indeed “super cute,” as he stood wearing a blue tee-shirt and shorts, his hair in a sweaty disarray. She admired his grace and speed on the field, but as he waited for the game to continue, Kate looked at his face. Suddenly his nose looked too big for his face. Kate shook her head. She knew this wasn’t true. In the next moment, a tiny mole on the side of Jacob’s neck seemed to grow to gargantuan proportions, huge and brown and disgusting. She stared at it, wondering how she could have missed that big mole. His legs appeared too skinny for his body and his knees looked like giant knuckles.

  Kate turned her head away for a moment and rubbed her eyes. She knew Jacob hadn’t actually cha
nged, but something had. Somehow, things weren’t quite the same.

  She turned back to the soccer game and the old Jacob was back. The nose looked just the right size. The mole shrank and became cute again. He was beautiful. Kate sighed a breath of relief. Things could still be the same. They didn’t have to change, she thought.

  Jacob broke away from the game and ran toward Kate, breaking her concentration. He sat next to her. “These guys are nutty. Do you want to get out of here?”

  “Why?” she asked. “Is the game over?”

  “Pretty much.” He plopped down next to Kate and gulped down a bottle of water.

  Kate noticed both twins leaning slightly to take a closer look at Jacob. This time, she didn’t feel that sense of pride she usually did when someone admired her boyfriend. Instead, she felt a twinge of annoyance.

  “Yes, let’s go,” she said and grabbed Jacob’s hand. “You can give Matt a ride, right?” she said to the twins, but didn’t wait for an answer. “Bye, Matt!” she yelled. He waved back.

  Jacob and Kate started walking toward the car, her fingers entangled tightly with his. Kate knew that if she turned around now and looked at the twins, they would both be staring at Jacob still.

  19.

  Kate never knew which was better; the formal dance, or the hours spent getting ready for a formal dance. And on this Saturday afternoon, there was twice the commotion as two Gilbert girls dressed for the Autumn Ball.

  After a long hot shower, during which Kate scrubbed every inch of her skin red, conditioned her hair repeatedly and shaved her legs not once, but twice, Kate was ready for the next phase, hair and makeup. She carefully drew on her eyes, applied heavy mascara and painted her lips a light peach color, not quite the pink she always wanted, but close. Hair was blown dry, set in curlers and sprayed heavily. Then, it was time for the dress.

  Kate was a finicky dresser. She didn’t really have a particular style, but she knew what she liked. This dress, she loved. Kate slipped into the exquisite dress. It was a dark purplish blue, the color of a moonlit lake, she thought, and made of a light, luminous material. A tight-fitting bodice and deep, round neckline, framed her face, while cute little spaghetti straps left her arms bare. Finally, the skirt hugged her body all the way to the floor with a long slit up to her mid-thigh. She stepped into strappy heels. It was almost complete.

  Once her hair was set, Kate pulled out the curlers and gently combed her fingers through her curly brown locks. She shook her head and watched the curls bounce against her face, she then grabbed them up and pinned them into a loose twist, leaving a few curls down. She kissed at herself in the mirror, eyeing the small gold cross still hanging at her throat. I look pretty darn good, she thought.

  She walked down the grand staircase feeling regal. Her parents were waiting at the bottom. Instead of praising her, Dad frowned.

  “Do you see how high that slit is? It goes all the way up her leg,” he complained to Kate’s mother.

  “I’m not a little girl anymore, Dad. Besides, most of the girls will be wearing short dresses. You should feel proud that your daughter has modestly covered most of her legs.”

  “I guess so. But it looks like I’m going to have to chaperone this dance. Honey, come and help me find a suit to wear,” he said teasingly. Kate was giggling at her father’s over-protectiveness, when both of her parents suddenly looked away. Lucy had appeared at the top of the stairs.

  “Look at this gorgeous creature,” Dad said as Lucy descended the staircase. Kate looked darn good, sure, but Lucy, little Lucy, she glowed. She wore a dress of powdery pink, short to show off her gymnast’s legs. A shimmering pink scarf was thrown over her creamy shoulders. Her dark hair was sleek and her blue eyes shone with excitement.

  “Oh, Kate, you look so pretty!” Lucy said, smiling at her big sister.

  “Thanks. So do you,” Kate said, without enthusiasm and a little annoyed at just how good Lucy looked.

  Mom grabbed her camera and snapped about twenty photos of her two oldest girls, all decked out for the Autumn Ball. When Jacob was finally allowed to see Kate, he dropped down onto his knees and pretended to worship her. He looked great, all spiffed up and ready to show off.

  “Hey, get up. You’re ruining your pants!” Kate said, laughing. “I’m not taking you to the dance if you have dirty knees. I get enough grief about being from Nebraska. If I show up with a man wearing dirty pants, it will only get worse.”

  Kate suddenly noticed little Marie, left out of all the fun. She stood quietly leaning against the staircase, watching her glamorous big sisters collect compliments. She was scowling. Kate felt a little sorry for her. She was so much younger than everybody else, she was often left out of family things: board games, camping trips, movies and now this. At that moment, Kate understood why Marie was such a miserable little girl.

  When Chris showed up, late of course, he completely ignored Kate. Instead, he walked straight up to Lucy, grabbed her hand and kissed it gently.

  “You look beautiful, Lucy,” he said admiringly.

  “Thank you,” Lucy said. “You look very handsome.” Kate could see the excitement in Lucy’s face. Not only was she going to her first formal dance, she was going with the cutest guy in school.

  Chris looked fantastic. Kate noticed with interest that he was wearing the same thing Jacob wore: tan pants, white shirt and a blue suit coat. The only difference was the color of their ties. And, Kate noticed with resentment, Chris looked better. He was handsome in jeans, tee-shirt and tousled hair. Seeing him clean-shaven and dressed up took her breath away. Kate knew she was staring too long.

  “Oh, hey Kate. You look nice,” Chris said with barely a glance.

  Just as they were preparing to leave, Marie finally left the staircase. She skipped into the middle of the room, grabbed Chris by the arm and tugged. Chris leaned down politely to hear what Marie had to say.

  “Yes, your majesty?” he said with a smile.

  Marie smirked devilishly and said, “You’re the one Kate really likes.” She looked at Kate with triumph.

  Kate’s mouth dropped open with shock. I’ll kill her.

  Chris, amused by this little comment, laughed and glanced at Kate, whose mouth was still agape. Jacob and Lucy looked less amused and also looked at Kate for her reaction.

  Kate stood frozen, not knowing what to do, but knowing her reaction would either validate or discount Marie’s outburst, so she steadied herself. “Yes, Marie, we all like Chris,” she said patronizingly. “Can we go now?” She grabbed her coat and moved toward the front door. This seemed to satisfy everyone, except Marie.

  “No, Kate really likes you,” Marie said, knowing her plan had been foiled and starting to pout. Her voice was being drowned out by the commotion of teenagers gathering their coats and walking out the door. Kate pretended to not hear.

  “Good-bye, Mom. Good-bye, Dad,” Kate said loudly, hoping to cover up any further comments the little rat might have in mind. Kate caught Marie’s eyes and promised her, through a visual glare, to get even.

  Marie met her stare and answered back. Bring it on.

  *

  Chris smartly left the two-seater convertible at home. Instead, he led them out to a sensible Suburu, with four seats and a top. The girls shimmied into their seats carefully and they headed off to the restaurant. It was a little Italian restaurant Chris had picked. It was right on the Kentucky border and served surprisingly delicious food. After huge helpings of salad and lasagna, the four topped off their dinner with the best tiramisu Kate had ever tasted. Well, it was actually the first tiramisu she had ever tasted, and it was definitely tasty.

  The guys seemed to get along well, chatting about sports and cars. Lucy giggled and beamed every time Chris spoke to her, even when he asked if she wanted more bread. Things seemed to be going smoothly and everyone was having a good time. Everyone but Kate. She found herself feeling left out of the conversation. Not intentionally, she felt, but she couldn’t seem to concentrate enough
to listen and add thoughtful comments. She sat across the table from Chris with strangely conflicted feelings.

  Yes, Chris looked gorgeous tonight. But as Kate searched her feelings, she didn’t think she was in love with Chris. In fact, she knew she wasn’t. She didn’t want to be his girlfriend. That would be a disaster, she decided. Why, then, did she feel so apathetic toward her own gorgeous date?

  Feeling like she was about to burst out of her dress, Kate excused herself and went to the ladies room. She reapplied her lipstick, then stared at her reflection.

  “What is the matter with you? You are here with your dream man, the love of your life,” she whispered to herself. Her voice sounded strange as it echoed off the tiled walls. She shook her head in rebuke. “Enjoy yourself. Stop thinking so much.” But the strange feeling remained. She returned to the table where the guys were splitting the check.