He wanted to be freed from his princely duties, not be caught up trying to live up to her expectations. She would want him to remain a prince. She would challenge him to be more and embrace his birthright. He’d seen her act that way with Brandt. That behavior and pressure didn’t appeal to Alejandro in the slightest. He’d spent too much of his life justifying himself and his actions. Continuing on that path would be hell on earth.
Julianna was the last woman Alejandro should want to be with. She was a perfect princess, with a royal heart and soul. Duty and country motivated her. She would use her role on La Isla de la Aurora to make a difference in Aliestle. He would never be able to make a princess like her happy. He wouldn’t want to try. Even if he liked kissing her.
And wanted to kiss her again.
So what now?
“We sail,” he answered.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
THREE HOURS OF sailing with high winds and waves kept Jules’s mind off Alejandro’s kisses. Thank goodness she’d needed to focus on steering the boat, or she would have been sighing, staring and swooning.
Pathetic.
But she couldn’t help herself. The way Alejandro made her feel overwhelmed Jules. Which was why she’d hurried up the dock back toward safety without a word as soon as the crew was ready to leave.
She may have apologized, but it wasn’t because kissing Alejandro had felt wrong. Kissing him had felt oh-so-right. As if that was what she should be doing today, tomorrow and every day for the rest of her life. That was why she’d been sorry. Feeling that way while engaged to Enrique wasn’t fair to either man.
She jogged through the park, eager to return to the palace and the sanctuary of her room. The suite provided all she needed—a means to escape and a lovely view from the windows. Enrique had been right about that. The pretty, colorful blossoms soothed her. She could use some soothing now.
Enrique.
She wove her way through the rocks in the grotto, passed through the wrought-iron gate and locked it behind her.
She didn’t want to think about her fiancé now.
Not with the effects of Alejandro’s kisses lingering.
The tunnel seemed darker and longer, and the smell of moisture and mold more pronounced. Each of her nerve endings seemed heightened in sensitivity. Her lips still tingled. The ache deep inside her that had started the moment his lips captured hers had grown exponentially since then.
Alejandro stirred something inside her. She was torn by her desire of wanting more and her guilt of knowing better.
Was this what passion felt like?
If so, the feeling frightened her even as it thrilled her. Allowing herself to be carried away by the strong current of emotion would be stupid. She had to be rational about this.
He hadn’t proclaimed his undying love and affection. He’d simply kissed her until she couldn’t think straight. He’d made her feel so special, like the only woman in the world.
Would that be the only time she ever felt like that? Her heart hoped not.
“Julianna.”
The sound of Alejandro’s voice sent a shiver of pleasure down her spine, but brought a twinge of uncertainty, too. She stopped walking. “I thought you were going to the boatyard.”
He caught up to her. The beam from his flashlight pointed at the dirt floor. “I wanted…”
You. She held her breath.
“…to talk with you,” he finished.
Disappointment squeezed her heart even though she knew his wanting her was as likely as her living happily ever after.
Alejandro reached forward and tilted her headlamp so the light shone up. “We never got a chance to talk on the boat.”
Her uncertainty increased three-fold. “A hard day of sailing. We needed to focus.”
“You didn’t smile much.”
“I had a lot on my mind.” Like now. She started walking. “I should get back to the palace.”
Being so close to him sent her out-of-whack emotions spiraling into the danger zone. His scent made her want to lean in closer for another sniff. His warmth made her want to seek shelter in his arms. And his lips made her want to forget what her future held.
He fell into step next to her, his flashlight swinging at his side. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“You mean on the boat?”
“And now.”
Jules didn’t know where to start. She took a deep breath. It didn’t help.
“Julianna,” he prompted.
“You. You were…are…on my mind.” There, she’d said it. Even though she figured Alejandro had guessed as much.
“You’ve been on my mind, too. We’re equal.”
Not even close. Jules had never felt this way about any man, not even Christian, whom she believed at the time she loved. Of course, she’d been sixteen then.
Not that she was in love with Alejandro. Except…
She wanted to be with him on the boat, off the boat, all the time. She wanted to sneak out of the palace for good and sail off into the sunset with him. And Boots. They wouldn’t have to sail—they could walk, run, drive or fly. She wasn’t particular on the mode of transportation as long as they were together. The thought of being without Alejandro…
What was she thinking?
Being with him was impossible. What she felt now was a crush. The new sensations he had awakened with his kiss were causing her to feel this way.
Not…love.
“About this morning below deck,” Alejandro said.
“It’s okay.” Jules didn’t dare look at him. No one could ever know how much his kisses had affected her. “Each time I exit this tunnel, I enter a whole new world full of wonderful, but forbidden things. Freedom. Sailing. Kissing.”
“You’ve never—”
“I’ve been kissed.” The surprise in his voice made her cheeks grow hot. Jules was embarrassed enough by letting a crush get so out of control. She wasn’t about to tell him she could count on one hand the number of times she’d been kissed. “But I’m not…as experienced as you.”
“I couldn’t tell.”
Well, she could tell he was an expert kisser. That kind of expertise took…practice.
Alejandro has a horrible reputation. Worse, his taste in women is far from discriminating. Royalty, commoner, palace staff, it doesn’t matter.
Yvette’s words were the cold dose of reality Jules needed. She was probably one in a long line of women who’d come before. A part of her—okay, her heart—didn’t want to believe that, but she’d allowed this to go way further than it should. Romanticizing his kisses made no sense. “Kissing you was a nice addition to my adventure.”
“Adventure?”
She nodded. “Escaping the palace, wearing a disguise and sailing on La Rueca’s crew. It’s all been a grand adventure, a fantasy I’ve been able to experience for a brief time, but I know it’s not…real.”
“The sailing has been real. Kissing you was—”
“Not real.” If the kisses weren’t real, neither were her feelings. “I mean, we kissed. But we were caught up in the moment. Two consenting adults in each other’s arms. The opportunity presented itself. A kiss was bound to happen.”
“Perhaps we should find out if the kisses are real or not.”
Jules’s gaze flew up to meet his.
His intense gaze seemed to penetrate all the way to her soul. Her breath caught in her throat. She’d never felt so exposed, so naked before.
A chill rushed through her. Goose bumps prickled her skin. “We…can’t.”
“Why not?”
Her heart slammed against her chest. Logically she knew what she should say, but those words would contradict what her heart and her lips wanted her to do. “This can’t go anywhere.”
Alejandro traced her jawline with his fingertip. “I know.”
His light-as-a-feather touch tantalized. Teased. Tempted. “I’m marrying Enrique.”
“I know that, too.” Alejandro’s rich voice seeped into her, filling all the empty
places with warmth. “The race begins tomorrow. This may be our last opportunity to be alone.”
Jules’s chest tightened. “This has to be the last time.”
He nodded and lowered his hand from her face. “That would be for the best.”
At least he agreed. Still, nerves gripped her. “But I…”
Silence hung between them, but instead of pushing them apart Alejandro drew closer. “Your move, Princess.”
Her move. Jules had never been in this position before, but she knew what she had to do. She raised her chin and pressed her lips against his. Hard.
A mistake? Probably.
But she wanted—needed—to kiss him one more time. She wanted to remember what his kiss felt like and how he made her feel.
Jules wrapped her arms around him and leaned in close. She tasted a mix of salt and heat. So delicious. She wanted to remember every detail, each texture.
As she deepened the kiss, sparks shot through her.
Okay, this kiss was real. She’d give him that.
The kiss made her quiver with pleasure and burn with desire.
But Jules didn’t know if the way she felt was real or not. She didn’t care. She just wanted to keep kissing him.
Because once she finished, Jules knew she would never kiss Alejandro again.
Tensions ran high the next morning. The first day of the Med Cup had arrived. Alejandro couldn’t believe how calm and cool Julianna was. She impressed the entire crew with her composure. She steered like a pro. The entire team worked together. The sweat and hard work enabled La Rueca to win their first race. Alejandro’s goal was one step closer.
And so was saying goodbye to Julianna.
He ignored the knot in his gut.
His father excused him from eating dinner at the palace that night. But Alejandro didn’t feel like celebrating as he sat at a tapas bar with the crew so he headed back to the palace.
Julianna.
She should have been with the crew tonight. With him.
Alejandro wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her until she begged him to stop or give her more. But he couldn’t.
This has to be the last time.
He’d agreed. Logically that made the most sense, but the way he felt about her didn’t make sense at all.
The kitten was waiting when Alejandro entered the apartment. “Hey, Boots.”
The kitten meowed.
Alejandro got an idea. “Want to go see Julianna?”
Another meow.
That was good enough for him. He swooped up the cat and went to Julianna’s room.
In the hallway, Yvette sat on a chair outside the door and read. She lowered her book. “Are you here to see Princess Julianna, sir?”
“Yes.” He showed her the kitten. “Boots wants to see her.”
As if on cue, the cat meowed.
“I’m sorry, sir. The princess is sleeping.”
Alejandro looked around. No one else was in the hallway. He smiled. “Please tell her I’m here.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Yvette repeated with a hint of disapproval this time. “Princess Julianna has an upset stomach and asked not to be disturbed until morning. Would you like me to tell her you and Boots paid a visit?”
“No, thanks. I’ll see her tomorrow.” Disappointment settled over the center of his chest. Alejandro wanted to see her now. “Good night.”
He returned to his apartment feeling out of sorts. He played with Boots using the laser pointer, but the kitten had more fun.
The entire time, Alejandro couldn’t stop thinking about Julianna. The passion in her eyes when they kissed. The exhilaration on her face during the race.
He had to see her for a minute. Yvette wasn’t about to let him pass, but he knew another way.
With a flashlight in hand, Alejandro used the secret door in his apartment to enter the tunnels. He wove his way around until he reached the staircase leading to Julianna’s room. Each step brought him closer to her. He stood on the landing and pulled the latch. The secret door opened.
Alejandro had been here before to leave her disguise and other gear she needed. He’d never thought twice about entering her closet.
But this time, he hesitated.
This can’t go anywhere.
I know.
I’m marrying Enrique.
I know that, too.
His conversation with Julianna echoed through his head. Yes, he wanted to see her. Hell, he wanted to kiss her.
But Julianna didn’t want that.
I’m marrying Enrique.
Alejandro might want to see her, but he couldn’t. She was determined to marry his brother. He wasn’t going to do something that both he and Julianna might regret. He knew better than that.
Alejandro closed the secret door.
This was for the…best.
The morning of the race, Julianna had instructed Yvette to tell anyone who came to the door she was suffering from a stomach virus. No one, especially Enrique, would want any part of that.
Hours later, she stood with her hands on the wheel, nervous and excited. Adrenaline coursed through her veins.
They were halfway through the course, running ahead of their closest competitor.
The tension and noise level had increased from yesterday’s match. The winds and waves had, too. Both had turned stronger over the last twenty-four hours. That made her job harder.
Water splashed into the cockpit. A foul weather suit kept her dry. Each member of the crew had a responsibility and knew what to do. Hers was to steer the boat. She focused her attention on the direction the boat sailed. She couldn’t think about anything else.
Or anyone else.
But Jules knew where Alejandro had been since the boat had left the dock. Her gaze was automatically drawn to him at midbow. Water dripped from his hair and his foul weather gear. He looked sexy and in his element. The sheer joy on his face tugged on her heart and her dreams.
One more day of racing. A week until her wedding. And it would be all over.
A sense of loss assailed her. She ignored it. Now wasn’t the time.
Each of the crew worked to keep the La Rueca sailing as fast as she could with adjustments to the sails. Others sat aft, trying to keep the weight on the stern.
The boat sailed downwind, surfing the waves that got bigger by the minute. The up and down motion of the boat reminded her of a thrilling roller coaster ride. More than once her stomach ended up in her throat, but she didn’t mind one bit.
Jules tightened her grip on the wheel. She needed to hold a steady course, but didn’t want to plow into a wave and risk the possibility of broaching.
Water hit her face and dripped down her cheeks. She tasted salt on her lips and in her mouth.
This was what she dreamed about. Freedom in its purest form.
She had no regrets. Well, one. Alejandro. But that wasn’t as much a regret as a what-might-have-been. Kissing him again had left a wound on her heart. One she hoped would heal in time.
“Dragon Rider’s broached,” Sam yelled from the midsection of the bow.
Jules could barely hear him, but she’d heard enough. Their competitor had heeled too far to one side and was lying broadside. Her stomach clenched. She hoped the crew were tied in. It would be easy to capsize or break the mast in these waves.
Everyone searched for the boat. The sails and waves got in the way. The mast must be in the water or someone would see it.
“Does it look like they are going to recover?” Alejandro’s voice sounded strained.
“I see them,” Sam shouted.
“Me, too,” Mike yelled. “They are knocked down.”
Jules inhaled sharply, but held the course.
“Has the boat righted itself?” Phillipe, who was nearest to her, asked.
“No,” Mike said.
The answer sent a chill down Jules’s spine.
“Man overboard,” a voice called over the radio.
“Trimming up for beam reaching
,” she said without a moment of hesitation.
Alejandro jumped off the deck and grabbed the radio. “La Rueca is responding.”
The energy level tripled. A sailor was in the water. A life was at stake. The race no longer mattered. Every able-bodied vessel was required to offer assistance.
He looked at Jules. Confidence and affection shone in his eyes. “You can do this.”
She nodded once.
As she turned the boat from the starboard side, the mainsail and jib trimmers went to work. No one wanted to waste any time, but they had to be careful. They didn’t want to broach as well.
“Get a fix on the person in the water,” she ordered Phillipe. With the race on hold, he needed another job. Jules needed to make sure she didn’t run the sailor over.
“I’ve got the beacon,” Alejandro said, moving toward the stern.
She knew he was clipped in, but she bit her lip, worried about his safety out there. And the other boat. They’d been fighting the waves all day. If he went overboard…
Don’t think. Just steer.
“I see him,” Mike yelled.
Jules heard the collective sigh of relief, but the sailor wasn’t safe yet.
Alejandro threw the overboard buoy toward the sailor in the water. The buoy was state of the art with a lighted pole, life ring, flotation jacket and location beacon.
“Sailor has the beacon,” Phillipe said. “You’ve sailed past him on the aft side.”
“Coming about,” she ordered. “Trim up.”
Jules gave the second order even though it wasn’t necessary. They knew what to do. She sailed over the waves. Tacking back, she guided the boat toward the buoy.
Alejandro stood on the bow, clipped into the jackline. Sam was nearby, too. They looked out at the water. Alejandro was too far away for her to hear him so he directed her with hand signals.
She slowed down, luffing leeward of the sailor in the water. The wind against the loose sails sounded like thunder. The crew shouted. The noise level kept rising. She must be getting closer.
Jules focused, pushing the boat to its limits to reach the sailor as quickly as possible.
A helicopter flew overhead.
Mike used a recovery hook to grab the buoy’s line, pulling the buoy and the person toward them. Cody grabbed the buoy pole and dragged it back toward the stern.
Not-So-Perfect Princess Page 15
