by Ella Miles
I run my hand through my hair trying to figure out where to start, but there is no good place to start. So I start with the truth.
I place the engagement ring that I gave her months earlier onto the table in front of us. I watch her eyes look at it and I swear I see the desperation that she is fighting back. She wants to take back the ring, but something is holding her back.
“I’m sorry. Truly. If I could take it back, I would. I would take back every drop of pain I ever caused you. Every heartache. Every fear. Every anxiety. I would take it all away, but I can’t.”
I watch her suck in a breath as she continues fighting her real feelings.
“You should just go, Carter. There is nothing you can say that will make this any better. Just go.”
“I can’t. I can’t just go. Not without you—or at least, not without knowing I did everything I could to make it better.”
I shake my head. “You got me fired. At least six times. How do you recover from that?”
“With love. Lots and lots of love. Because this is what our life would be like together. Maybe not at this extreme level, but we like fighting; you said so yourself. You like fighting and arguing. I do, too. And I like making it up to you. I’ve heard makeup sex is pretty good, too.”
She scowls at me.
“Because you are my whole life. I quit my job today. I passed my company along to my number two, although I warned him that he would struggle to get a job as long as you were working. I’m giving up everything that I thought I ever wanted to have a chance at a life with you. I’ll stay home and cook and clean for you while you go out and live your dreams. I’ll take care of your family. I’ll take care of you. I’ll help you fix your life, like you fixed mine.”
She doesn’t breathe.
“I hope you’ve gotten all of my apologies, but I have two apologies left that I need to say in person. One, I need to apologize for making you think I was going to ask you to prom in high school and then asking Lily instead. I ended your relationship with Mark before it started and then prevented you from having a chance at another relationship by starting that nasty rumor. I’m so sorry. If I had listened to my heart, I would have taken you to prom instead of Lily. But I was scared. Lily was easy, she wasn’t real love. But I knew that I could really love you.
“And two, I need to apologize for what I put your family through by getting you fired. They relied on you, and I hurt them. I’ve already apologized to them, but I will continue to apologize to them over and over again until I make it up to them.”
She bites her lip and I know I’m starting to break through her walls.
“How am I doing?”
“Pretty good,” she says in almost a whisper.
I can’t hold back any longer, I grab her hands and hold her as close to me as possible, while I lean over the table and kiss her. I expect her to pull away. Slap me maybe. Instead, she kisses me back. It’s a desperate kiss full of hope and need. Our lips crash hard together and our tongues dance together like they’ve never been apart.
It feels right kissing her.
Slowly we stop, but we don’t stop holding hands.
“I’m so sorry, Victoria. Please, let me spend the rest of my life attempting to make it up to you.”
“I can’t marry you.”
My heart stops.
“I’m pregnant,” she says and for the first time, I see the difference in her that I couldn’t figure out before. Her breasts are larger, her face fuller, and I can finally see a bit of her belly protruding out as I glance over the table.
I wanted her to move on with her life while I was gone. I wanted her to be happy. She did that. And now, she’s having another man’s baby.
Anguish doesn’t even begin to touch what I’m feeling. Sadness. Desperation. Depression. Disappointment. Fear. Guilt. Frustration. None of the words fully cover what I’m feeling.
Hurt. I’m beyond hurt.
“Congratulations,” I finally say, because it’s what I should say. I should be happy for her. I want to ask who the father is, but I can’t get the words to leave my mouth. It is also clear now why she gave Lily the idea to pretend she was pregnant. Because she, herself, was pregnant.
I want to scream that this can’t be happening. She can’t have another man’s baby. She should be having mine.
I grab the ring that is still lying on the table untouched and hold it out to her. “I want you Victoria. All of you. I want your family. Your baby. I want to spend the rest of my life loving you. I want to spend it taking care of you and your family. I would love to do it as your husband. But I’ll take it as your friend. Or if you won’t let me back into my life then just know that I will always be looking out for you. Even if it has to be from afar.”
She stares down at the ring. “You hurt me, Carter. You’re the only person who has truly been able to hurt me.”
I watch the tears starting in her eyes. “I thought that by becoming heartless, like I thought you were, would make me feel better. I thought it would make me be able to protect my heart more and, in turn, my family. But sitting here now looking at you, my heart still hates you and loves you in equal parts.”
“I’ll take the hate, as long as I can take the love part too.”
She wipes a tear off her cheek. “Can you forgive me?”
I raise an eyebrow and smile. “You don’t have anything for me to forgive you for. I deserved everything that you dolled out to me in regards to Lily.”
She shakes her head. “I’m not talking about Lily. I wasn’t going to tell you the truth about the baby.”
She rests her hand on her stomach that looks larger every time she moves. She must be pretty far along, which means she met the father quickly after we broke up.
“I don’t deserve to know about the baby. You lived your life while I was picking up the pieces to mend mine.”
She bites her lip and then the words fall out of her mouth. “The baby is yours.”
I freeze. “What?”
“The baby is yours.”
I jump out of the booth and over to her side climbing into the booth next to her. I get a better look at her stomach and realize that she is about to pop any day now.
“Can you forgive me? I wasn’t going to tell you about the baby even though it’s yours. I wasn’t sure I could take the chance that you wouldn’t hurt this baby too. But after I thought more about it, I knew you would never intentionally hurt this baby. I was hiding the baby from you to get back at you. I had turned heartless and wanted you to feel the pain that I felt.”
I laugh. “I don’t care. I’m just so happy that the baby is mine and not some other asshole’s.” I put my hand on her stomach, feeling the baby kick inside her. Magical is all I think as I feel the baby inside her.
“God, Victoria, I know I’ve made plenty of mistakes in the past, but know that I’m going to love this baby with everything I have.”
“It’s a boy,” she says grinning.
“I’m going to love and protect our son with everything that I have.”
She nods. “I know.”
I hold out the ring to her, not sure where we go from here, except that I love her and I need to be a part of her life.
She takes the ring hesitantly in her hand, then places it on the ring finger of her right hand. “Maybe someday I’ll move it to its proper place on my left hand, but for now I just want to be happy. I want to work hard. I want to take care of this new baby. And I want you to be a part of that.”
I grin and kiss her long and slow.
“I know that you have mixed emotions toward me, but how do you feel about me right here in this moment? Do you still hate me or love me?”
“Why?” I ask.
“Because there is a restroom behind you that I would love to fuck you in.”
She grins. “Love. Definitely love.”
Epilogue
Victoria
I hear Charlie crying as I clasp my bracelet onto my wrist. We were supposed to leav
e five minutes ago for our dinner date, but it seems that Charlie really doesn’t want us to go.
I walk out of my bedroom and head down the hallway toward Charlie’s room. I guess our dinner date will have to wait a little longer. I make it almost to his room when Carter grabs my hand and pulls me into the hallway closet as he shuts the door behind us. He puts his hand over my mouth and makes a shh sound.
I raise an eyebrow at him and wait for him to remove his hand from my lips.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“We aren’t here remember. We are on our date. We haven’t had a date since Charlie was born six months ago and we aren’t going to get trapped here again. What is the benefit of living with your entire family if you don’t take advantage of the free babysitting?”
“But Charlie—”
“Is fine.”
I listen and I hear Amber and Sailor comforting Charlie down the hallway.
“See?”
I nod.
“You look sexy, by the way,” Carter says, looking me up and down in a skin-tight red dress.
I bite my lip. “I thought you would like it.”
“I’d like to see you out of it more.”
He grabs the back of my neck and pulls me into a deep kiss. My arms fall around his neck as I breathe in his cologne. He smells good, almost as good as he tastes.
He pushes me hard against the closet wall and I let out a squeal.
His hand covers my mouth again. “You have to be quiet Victoria. I’m going to fuck you and you wouldn’t want anyone to hear you.”
“We can’t,” I whisper. “They are all just down the hallway.”
“Then you better be very, very quiet.”
He slides his hands up my thighs pushing my dress up until he reaches his goal. He hooks one finger under my panties and pulls them down, hard. He kisses me to keep me quiet as his fingers move to the slit between my legs.
“Carter,” I moan.
“Shh,” he says as he unzips his pants and pushes his cock against my stomach.
“Wait,” I say.
He stops. “What? I’ll make sure we don’t miss our reservations, but I need you baby. Now.”
I bite my lip. “I know.”
“Then why are we waiting?”
He kisses my neck and I forget what I wanted to tell him.
I moan and he grins.
“God, I can’t get enough of that sound.”
He pushes his cock inside me hard and fast, while I wrap my legs around his waist and ride him hard. Sex with Carter is never normal. We rarely fuck in a bed and he always likes to keep things interesting. I sometimes pick a fight with him, just so we can have savage, rough sex that only he can give me. But right now, it’s not about that. Because after seeing how Carter is with Charlie, I couldn’t hate him.
“You want to come, don’t you baby?”
I nod.
“Good, don’t scream. Or I’m going to take you to our bedroom and really have my way with you and we will never make it to dinner.”
I bite my lip as hard as I can as Carter fucks me into my orgasm. I try to keep my mouth quiet, but my whole body is screaming. My body tightens around his and my hands claw at his neck.
My orgasm finally stops and Carter grabs my left hand that is clawing at his neck far too hard.
“Jesus, Victoria. You don’t understand how to be gentle, do you?”
I bite my lip. “Sorry.”
He grins and then looks more closely at my left hand. His eyes widen when he finally realizes what I wanted to tell him.
“Does this mean what I think it means?” he asks, staring at my engagement ring that I finally put on my left hand.
I nod. “I want to marry you and have more babies with you and live happily ever after with you Carter.”
He kisses me hard on the lips and I couldn’t be happier. I never thought that I could be this happy. None of us did. Our lives started out so crappy. But somehow, we came back together and became a family, all under one roof taking care of each other.
“I’ll marry you under one condition,” he says.
I smirk. “Oh? I don’t think you are in any position to be making demands.”
“I think that’s exactly where I am.” He kisses me again and he knows I would give him anything.
“I’ll marry you if you promise to never stop hating me as much as you love me. I’m not sure I could ever give up our rough, love to hate you sex sessions.”
I grin. “I think I can give you that,” I say, half lying. There is no way I can hate Carter, but pretending that I hate him is easy. I’ve had years of practice hating him. I’ll spend eternity loving and hating him.
The End
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Maybe Yes
Her future is already set, all she has to do is marry a complete stranger.
Kinsley Felton has everything. Money, a loving family, and a modeling career. She graduates from Yale in just days, but unlike a typical college student she doesn't have to spend hours looking for a job when she graduates. Kinsley will inherit the multi-billion dollar gaming and hospitality company her great-grandfather started. The only problem is she has to do everything her family asks for in order to get that money. That includes marrying a man of her family's choosing. That's not a problem since Kinsley has been following her family's orders all her life. Until a phone call from her grandfather changes everything.
Will she marry the man her family chooses or will she decide her own future?
Warning: Three book series. Ends on a cliffhanger. Contains hot sex, a female that finds her strength, and dark pasts that turn very dark as the series progresses. Only for those that love dirty romances, edge of your seat suspense, twists, and a little bit of darkness. Spinoff series featuring Scarlett from Maybe series now available!
Entire Maybe series available now!
Maybe Yes
Maybe Never
Maybe Always
Spinoff Series:
Definitely Yes
Definitely No
Definitley Forever
“Hey, boring,” my loudmouthed friend says, bouncing into my apartment. Scarlett didn’t bother to knock. She just opened the door like she lives here. She practically does though.
We’ve known each other our entire lives. If it weren’t for our parents’ pocketbooks allowing each of us to have our own luxury apartment, we would have been roommates. Sometimes, I wish we had been anyway, so we could have gotten the real college experience. It would have never worked though. Our clothes alone would have been too much to fit into one apartment together.
“Hey, Scar,” I say, not looking up from the book I’m using to study for my art history exam.
Scarlett plops down next to me on the white sectional. She stretches out until she is covering half of the couch. “Really? It’s our last weekend before we graduate. Why the hell are you studying?”
“Because we have finals next week.”
“So what? It’s Friday night. Study on Monday morning, like the rest of us.”
I shake my head as I turn the page. “I want to get good grades, unlike the rest of you.”
Scarlett reaches over and pulls the book from my lap. She tosses it onto the floor before I can even protest.
I exhale, looking at Scarlett. “What are you doing here? I thought you were going out dancing with Jake tonight.”
I watch as she flips her long ombre brown-colored locks over her shoulder before she begins picking the polish off her perfectly manicured hands.
“I broke up with Jake,” she says, not looking up at me.
“Ugh, not again.”
She quickly sits up. “Don’t lecture me, she who has never ha
d a boyfriend.”
I roll my eyes. “I’ve had a boyfriend before. There is just no point in dating right now. I’m supposed to be focusing on my studies and modeling jobs.”
Scarlett yawns. “Boring.”
“How did this become about me? You’re the one who broke up with that boy again. That makes it the fifth time this year.”
“I’m tired of being tied down. I want to be single when I go off into the world.”
I get up and go pick up my textbook off the floor. “But why are you here? You still have time to find a date to take you out tonight.” I turn to face her. “Or you could go alone since that’s what you want so much.”
She smiles mischievously at me. “Or you could go with me?”
“No,” I say as I settle back into the couch.
When I glance back up, she pouts her lip, and her eyes grow sad in a way only she knows how to do.
“Please,” she begs.
I can’t help the smile that grows over my lips from seeing her beg like this. She’s not begging because she needs someone to go out to the bars with her. Scarlett is the most confident person I know. She loves being the center of attention. She’s asking because she wants me to have fun for once in my life.
“I don’t know…maybe,” I say, giving her the same answer I’ve told her hundreds of times before.
“Come on, Kins. You don’t need to study. You have the highest grades in our class, and you don’t even like theater.”
“I do, too,” I protest even though I don’t, not really. I suck at acting. I find the history behind theater interesting, but I have no interest in really working in that field.
On autopilot, I pull my phone out of my pocket. I begin texting my dad, like I always do. But I know what he’s going to say before I even ask. He’ll say no. It’s seven thirty. I’m supposed to call him in an hour for our weekly updates. I love his calls, but I think he chose Friday nights just to keep me out of the bars and clubs, not that I mind. It’s also why he chose Yale for me over some of the other colleges. Yale isn’t exactly known for being a party school. I prefer his calls to drinking until I puke, like Scarlett does.
