“We were young and neither of us knew how to deal with what happened.”
“Does anyone know how to deal with that?”
He shook his head. “How’s your mother?”
Honey shrugged. “Fine, I guess. Off teaching yoga to some celebrity somewhere hot. She texts now and then and emails, but she’s busy and we’ve never really been close.”
Elliott nodded. “I know and it’s a shame. I had hoped that you’d become closer when you went travelling with her.”
“That didn’t happen. She threw herself into the life and I spent a lot of time in hotel rooms and walking on beaches alone.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It certainly wasn’t your fault. Besides, I’ve made some really close friends here and things are much better now.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Are we… are we good then?”
“Of course, and I appreciate you coming here to tell me your news. You’ll be a wonderful father.”
“I’ll try. Are you… seeing someone?”
“Kind of, but it’s complicated.”
“Like in a Facebook way?”
“Ha! Yes, I suppose so.”
“Do you think you’ll ever want to try again?” He held up his hands. “That’s none of my business. Forget I asked.”
“I have no idea. Right now, the thought terrifies me and I know it could go wrong again… if it ever happens. Afterwards, with the infection… they said there was a chance of scarring.”
“You’re still young.”
“And I’m not ready for all that right now, but I also have to accept that it might not happen.”
“I’m so sorry, Honey.”
She squeezed his hand.
“What will be, will be.”
“Always so philosophical.”
“Not always and deep down I’m a terrible worrier but keep that between you and me.”
“I’ll take it to my grave.”
“Are you hungry?”
“I could eat.”
“Still got hollow legs then?”
Elliott laughed. “I do have a big appetite, yes, and seem to be able to get away with eating a lot.”
“Then let’s have some brunch, shall we? That’s the thing with hangovers, they make me hungry.”
Honey went to the fridge and got out some peppers and mushrooms then broke some eggs into a bowl. She made them a hearty vegetable omelette and more coffee. Speaking to Elliott had made her feel better, although it had left her drained and she hoped she’d have a chance to take a nap that afternoon.
Clearing the air could be therapeutic; Allie and Camilla were right about that. She couldn’t change the past, no one could, but she could learn from it and try to embrace the present and look towards the future.
And as for that future, who knew? For now, she would have brunch with Elliott then consider how to explain everything to Dane. She owed him that much and hoped that he would understand.
13
“Thanks for coming, Elliott.”
“I’m glad I did. I feel… better for clearing the air.”
“Me too. I’d been thinking about it for a while, only I didn’t realise quite how much it was getting to me.”
They smiled at each other then Elliott opened his arms and Honey hugged him. They stood there for a few minutes, and the remaining tension seeped out of Honey as she let go of the past. There was definitely an air of sadness about the situation but it was also a good thing, because now she could move on. Hopefully, she could really be herself with Dane.
“Goodbye then.”
Elliott kissed her cheek.
“Goodbye and good luck! I hope it all goes well for you. Text me and let me know…”
Elliott nodded but Honey suspected that he’d be far too busy to think about her once his baby arrived; his heart and mind would be full of his wife and child, and that was exactly how it should be.
As she waved Elliott off, her thoughts returned to Dane. He’d seen Elliott entering her cottage and hadn’t looked happy about it. She’d shower and dress – because she didn’t want to head over there dressed as a unicorn – then go to see him this afternoon.
Honey padded up the stairs with a smile on her face, feeling better than she had done in a while, because now she felt able to fully commit to her future.
Honey knocked on Dane’s door then turned to look at the pretty front garden. In the borders, tulips and daffodils created a sea of colour, and on the neighbouring roof, a blackbird sang, creating the perfect springtime scene.
Footsteps inside alerted her to Dane’s presence and when the door swung open, she smiled, anticipating seeing Dane’s handsome face.
But the frown that sat heavy on his brow made her stomach lurch.
“Oh,” he said. “It’s you.”
“Hi.” She licked her lips nervously. “Uh… I wanted to speak to you.”
“What about?”
“I saw you earlier and I wanted to explain.”
He stared at her, a tiny muscle in his jaw twitching, then he sighed.
“Come in.”
He led her through to the lounge.
“Take a seat. Can I get you anything?”
She thought about asking for a coffee, as her hangover still lingered uncomfortably, but she couldn’t bear to wait any longer to speak to him.
“No, I’m fine, thanks.”
Dane sat on a chair, not next to her on the sofa, and her heart plummeted. She allowed her eyes to roam over him, taking in his freshly washed hair, the grey T-shirt that clung to his muscular arms and chest and his loose jogging bottoms. He’d clearly showered recently and slung on his comfy clothes.
“Dane… that was my ex that you saw me with earlier. I haven’t seen him in ages and that’s why I was hugging him.”
Dane shrugged. “You don’t need to explain anything to me.”
“Well I do… because if I saw you hugging a woman, I’d want to know why. It wasn’t how it might have looked.”
“Okay. Thanks for telling me.”
“We had a good talk… me and Elliott, and I feel able to… I’d really like—”
Dane shook his head.
“Honey, I’m sorry. I appreciate you coming here but I’ve got a lot to do.”
“But I’d like to tell you about what happened to me before. About why I’ve been scared.”
He nodded.
“I have things I’d like to tell you too. Like… this week I have a job interview.”
“You do? I’m so sorry, I meant to ask but got side-tracked…”
“It’s okay. Anyway, I was shortlisted.”
“Well that’s great!”
“It is and it isn’t.”
“It’s in the bag, surely?”
“I can’t be certain of that.” He dropped his gaze to the wooden floor and she noticed that he couldn’t keep his hands still. “It’s a big deal for me as I love the school and I’d love to settle in Heatherlea.”
“Of course it is and I really hope you get it, Dane.”
“Thank you.” He smiled and the coldness in the room thawed slightly. “I’ve got a lot of work to do today though. I have to prepare a lesson, prepare for the interview, then if I’m shortlisted again on Wednesday, I’ll have to go through another day of it on Thursday.”
“Two days?” Honey gasped.
“Well they had a lot of interest, even at such short notice, but I guess there are lots of teachers looking for a great position in a beautiful village school. There are some strong candidates in the running, apparently. The head teacher’s PA told me… unofficially, of course. The selection process is going to be tough.”
Honey’s stomach clenched at the thought of Dane having to go through so much.
“Are any of the candidates newly qualified teachers?” She asked the question, as she knew that new teachers sometimes had the edge over more experienced colleagues because they were cheaper to pay.
Dane shook his head. “I w
ouldn’t have thought so because the school is also offering a teaching and learning responsibility with the job… for coordinating science. That’s why there were so many applicants, as well as the fact that it’s a fabulous school to work at in a great location.”
“Wow! You’d be great at that.”
Dane gave a small laugh. “I’d give it my best shot. I’m enthusiastic about delivering science to the pupils because we’re creating our next generation of scientists, doctors, nurses and more. But there could be a candidate with better experience or someone who interviews better than I do. I hate to admit it, Honey, but I’m really nervous and when I’m anxious I don’t always come across very well.”
His cheeks flushed and Honey saw how difficult this was for him. He really wanted this job, and to stay in Heatherlea, and she knew that she didn’t want to complicate this week any further for him.
“You’ll be amazing, Dane. Look… we can talk another time.”
“No.” He shook his head. “You had something you needed to tell me.”
“I do, but it can wait. You have enough on your mind right now. Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Not unless you have the interview questions and fancy teaching the lesson for me?” He rubbed his hands over his face then pushed them back through his hair.
“I would if I could.”
Honey stood up.
“I’m going to go now and let you get on with your planning. If you need anything at all, just give me a shout. I’m not going far today.”
Dane walked her to the door.
“Thanks, Honey.”
She smiled then gently pecked him on the lips and walked out into the bright afternoon. When she turned to wave, Dane was standing in the doorway, the blue of his eyes darker than she’d seen it before and his shoulders slightly slumped, as if he was weighed down by the thought of the week ahead.
Honey wanted to run back to him and hold him tight, to make all of his nerves subside and to help him prepare for the interview, but she knew that she’d probably be more hindrance than help. So she made her way home, her heart heavy and her mind racing. Her feelings for Dane ran deeper than she’d realised; her urge to see him succeed in his chosen career and to see him happy, really mattered to her.
He really mattered to her.
14
Wednesday morning dawned and Honey was a bag of nerves. She’d barely slept, watching the numbers on the digital clock on her bedside table change, taunting her as she tossed and turned.
Finally, at just gone five, she’d got up and pulled on her yoga pants and vest top and run through her routine, enjoying how the familiar stretches and controlled breathing helped her to zone out, if just for a short while.
After seeing to the chickens, she’d picked at a piece of toast and drunk two mugs of green tea before deciding that a day at home would not be good for her at all. She needed to get out and to keep her mind busy, so she’d go to the café to see Allie. She had heard from Dane, via text message, several time since Sunday, and it sounded as though he’d been working every spare minute he had. Honey could only hope – for his sake – that if he secured the job, then he’d be able to relax a bit and enjoy some time out. Working so hard all the time would not be good for him long term; it was a sure fire way to burn out.
Once she’d showered and dressed, she made her way to the café, arriving at the same time as Allie.
“Good morning.”
“Hi, Honey.” Allie frowned. “Am I late opening or are you just up and about very early?”
“It’s still early. I couldn’t sleep.”
“You okay?” Allie asked.
“Yes, just a bit anxious about today.”
Allie let them into the café then took her bag and the keys and tucked them behind the counter.
“What’s today?”
“Dane’s interview.”
“Oh, yes!” Allie tucked her blonde hair behind her ears then pulled a red apron over her head. “When we don’t have our Tuesday meet ups, I forget what day it is.”
Honey nodded. They hadn’t got together at the café last night, as they usually did on a Tuesday, because Dawn wouldn’t have been able to make it. Camilla had wanted to go to see her sister and the baby, so Allie had suggested to Honey that they leave it until next week.
“Do you want to come through to the kitchen while I get ready for the day?” Allie asked.
“Yes, of course.”
While Allie chopped and stirred, Honey got stuck in peeling potatoes and vegetables, and soon an hour had passed with them chatting about Dawn and the new baby, as well as about the egg hunt that Allie and Chris were planning for Easter Sunday.
“Time for a coffee, I think.” Allie washed her hands then they went through to the café.
“Make mine a strong one, please.”
“You need the caffeine?”
“I was worrying about Dane so much last night that I couldn’t rest.”
“That’s understandable. Interviews can be so gruelling.”
“He’s not supposed to know but the head teacher’s PA told him there are some strong candidates.”
“But Dane’s so good at what he does, isn’t he? I remember Dawn telling us that local parents approved of him.”
“Yes and he’s dedicated and energetic and he really wants this.”
“Here you go… one latte with a double shot of espresso.”
“Thank you so much.”
“Let’s have a sit down, shall we? I have ten minutes before I officially open.”
They settled onto the leather sofa.
“Try not to worry. I’m sure Dane has as good a chance of getting the job as any of the others. Besides, he’s been doing the job, so he probably has a better chance.”
“I hope so but nothing’s guaranteed.”
Allie cocked her head.
“What’s wrong?”
“I can hear my mobile ringing.” Allie patted her pockets through the apron then stood up and peered at the counter. “I’m not sure what I did with it.”
She hurried through to the kitchen and the ringing stopped.
Honey sipped her coffee and tried to relax. Usually, the lovely interior of the café with its shabby-chic furniture and groaning bookshelves, as well as the delicious aromas coming from the kitchen, made her feel better. It was a safe haven; a place where troubles could be put aside and she could find comfort in a warm drink, a good meal and the company of her best friends. But this morning, even the café’s ambience was failing to raise her spirits.
Allie appeared in the doorway, her face pale.
“What is it?” Honey put her mug on the coffee table in front of the sofa. “Has something happened?”
Allie slumped onto the sofa and turned her mobile over in her hands.
“It’s Mandy. I’m so worried about her.”
Allie’s daughter worked in London and rarely returned to Heatherlea. She’d been devastated by her father’s death over six years ago and had told her mother that there were too many painful memories in the village. Allie had admitted that she missed her daughter enormously, and she got up to London whenever she could, but it wasn’t as often as she’d have liked because she had the café to run.
“What did she say?”
“Oh…” Allie blinked hard then leant her head back on the sofa. “She was crying again. She doesn’t feel very well, which I suspect is due to stress, and she wants to come home. Actually wants to come home for a break… but she’s torn because of work and doesn’t want to miss any time.”
“Couldn’t she take some leave?”
“Maybe. But she’s not very good at listening to my suggestions. I said that she should come back and have a rest but she started spouting reasons why she couldn’t. I think she’s exhausted to be honest.”
“If she’s working as hard as you said she is, then I’d say definitely.”
“She loves her job so much but there have been… complications.”
/> “Oh.”
Allie sighed. “There’s a man and from what she’s said… or not said… I think she’s in love. Problem is that she doesn’t know how he feels and doesn’t want to push things.”
“That sounds familiar.”
Allie gave a wry laugh then squeezed Honey’s hand. “It’s not easy this life, is it?”
“Not at all. I’m sure Mandy will be fine though. She’s her mother’s daughter.”
“I think that’s why she’s finding this relationship so difficult. She’s having trouble letting go of her independence.”
“Do you think it will last?”
“I have no idea. As long as she’s okay though, that’s all that matters.”
“I’m sure she will be.”
“Do you know what I need?”
“What?”
“Cake.”
“At this time?”
“Breakfast muffins, Honey. As good an excuse to eat cake before nine as I can think of. Want one?”
“Go on then.”
Allie got two freshly baked blueberry muffins and handed one to Honey. It was light and sweet and the blueberries slightly tart as they popped in Honey’s mouth. It was the perfect combination and she savoured every mouthful.
“I needed that.” Honey wiped her fingers on a napkin. “Comfort food.”
“The best kind. Time for another coffee?”
“I have all the time in the world.”
“Wonderful.”
And as Allie made two coffees, Honey carried their plates out to the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher. Allie was right; life wasn’t easy, but good friends, cake and coffee helped, and Honey was lucky enough to be able to enjoy all three.
15
Stomach fluttering, Honey stood outside Dane’s front door and paused. Was she doing the right thing? She was desperate to know how his day had gone, to find out if the interview had been a success.
When he came to the door, he was wearing suit trousers and a white shirt that was open at the throat, revealing an enticing triangle of skin. She fought her desire to step forwards and press her mouth to that skin, to kiss him and wrap her arms around his waist. It was a hard fight.
A Year at The Cosy Cottage Café: A heart-warming feel-good read about life, love, loss, friendship and second chances Page 40
