Well, I couldn’t wait around with all them crazy chicks for six to twelve weeks, or however long it was gonna take to get a foster place lined up for me. Jeez, some of them girls were brick shithouse insane. It was too much to have to sleep beside them, eat with them, talk to them. They were all fucked up. And I know I’m not perfect, but these chicks made me look like an angel. I thought this one girl was gonna kill me! Serious. Nasty white chick. She liked my jeans. Then she liked my lipstick. She said maybe somethin bad would happen to me, then she could have all my stuff. This other girl said she could make it so my right eye matched my left, and showed me this rusty steak knife she kept under her pillow. Said she could do it while I was sleepin, so I wouldn’t feel nothin. Crazy bitch. So I took off. And now here I am, back out on the street. Just tryin to make it through, one day at a time.
MERCY
I didn’t think Mac would let Sly Girl into the gang, but I had to try anyway. I don’t know why. Something about this girl … stopped me. I felt like she needed us. She needed the Black Roses, and we needed her. Just one of those feelings you get sometimes about a person. You ever get that?
So I brought her over for Christmas dinner. Kayos couldn’t come because she was feasting with her family somewhere in Shaughnessy, but she said she’d sneak out later and come over. Mac and I had nowhere to go, and I thought it would be kind of lonely with just the two of us, so I brought Sly Girl over and made mashed potatoes and butter chicken. I could tell by the way she ate that she lived on the street, but it didn’t really matter to me. I knew she would be good for us. And I knew she’d be good at selling our shit on the corners. She already knew who was who and what everyone’s poison was and what they would be prepared to pay. I mean, she would probably be better at it than me and Mac. As long as she stayed sober. And I doubted that anyone out there would fuck with her because she looked so scary. Her left eye and cheek were all disfigured. Like she’d been in some kind of accident, or attacked by a dog or something. She told us she was from an Indian reserve in Alberta. I figured her scars were from something that had gone down there. She said she was never going back. She said the Downtown Eastside was a kind of heaven compared to that place. At least people look out for you here, she said, and shoved a forkful of potatoes past her lips.
I looked at Mac. She had hardly said anything all night. She took a big gulp of her wine.
Ask her, I mouthed across the table.
Mac and I watched Sly Girl as she swallowed without chewing and shovelled more and more potatoes into her mouth, until they were all gone and she reached for seconds.
So, you get high? Mac asked.
Nah, not no more. I used to, but you know, I gotta make it to fourteen. She laughed, put her hand to her face, covering her bad eye.
I nodded at Mac.
So, what is it you all do for work, if you don’t mind me askin? She drained her wine glass and I poured her another.
We’re in a gang, Mac said. An all-girl gang.
Really?
Yeah.
That’s cool.
Wanna be in it?
Hells yeah, she said. And just like that, we had our runner.
I grinned at Mac and Sly Girl, and raised my glass in a toast. To the Black Roses. May we have everything we need, and get everything we want.
KAYOS
New Year’s Eve was busy on the street because everyone wanted to party harder than they usually do, which, as you can imagine, is really fucking hard. After dinner, Mac had sent me out with Sly Girl to work the corners. It was nasty out there with the wind and sleet, not to mention all the strung-out freakshows skittering around on their wobbly legs. I hated it, for real. But Mac said Sly Girl needed someone out there with her, to make sure she felt safe. Soon she would get her own gun, and then maybe I wouldn’t have to go with her anymore. Honestly, yo, I think I was just there to make sure she didn’t make off with the stash or smoke what she was supposed to be selling. I kinda just stood back in the shadows and let her make all the transactions. She was doing good. She was quick and subtle enough about it all, and as far as I could tell, she was sober as a nun. I knew she’d had problems with drugs, but who hasn’t? I mean, this is the Downtown Eastside. You’re a product of your environment. Probably the only reason I’m not an addict is because I got pregnant before I could really get a taste for it, then we moved to Shaughnessy, and, well, it wasn’t around so much.
As I was thinking about all this, this fucking guy with a huge tarantula tattooed on his neck comes up to Sly Girl. He gets all in her face, right, and starts yelling, What the fuck you doin, bitch? Don’t you know this is Unified Peoples territory?! Get the fuck outta here! Go on, get your ugly ass outta here, you skanky pirate hooker. Go back to whore island! Git!
Sly Girl lowered her head and started to walk away, but I stopped her and closed my fist around the handle of the .32 inside my jacket pocket.
Hey fuck-ass, listen here, I said to the guy. We’ve got just as much right to be out here as you do, so you better step off, bitch.
He spat on the ground and a fat wad of phlegm landed beside my foot.
Oh yeah? He stepped toward me.
Yeah.
You’re one crazy bitch. Who you claimin?
The Black Roses, don’t mess.
He started to laugh. That pussy gang? I heard of yous. I thought yous was a joke! Yous are for real? That’s hilarious! Then he stopped laughing. You know what? If you had any brains in that head of yours, you’d back on outta here right fuckin now. Take your girlfriend here, and never come back. Unified Peoples control the Downtown Eastside, and anyone who says different gets a face-to-face meet with Mr Smith and Mr Wesson, know what I’m sayin? His pocket bulged with what must have been his gat.
Inside I was shaking, but I knew I couldn’t back down to this fuck-wad or I’d permanently ruin the name of the Black Roses. This was my job, to represent.
Listen, fool, we’re here. We’ve got loyal customers. We’re not leaving. Deal with it.
He stepped closer to me, the veins in his neck bulging under the spider.
The market’s big enough for both of us, don’t you think? I glanced right and left into the alleys beside us, where junkies scuttled through the night like rats.
His dark eyes flashed with a meanness that made me want to run as fast and as far as I could.
Bitch, you and me’s got beef now. You’re lucky I’m on probation, or I’d knock your head off right here, right now, I swear to God.
I turned to Sly Girl. Whaddya think, Sly?
She shrugged, retreating into her hoodie like a turtle into its shell.
I guess we’ll take a walk over to Oppenheimer, offload the rest of this quality shit. We turned away from him and started walking.
Don’t even think about it! Oppenheimer’s ours too! You can fuck off outta here! Hear me?
We kept walking. Every hair on the back of my neck was standing up. I expected a bullet to rip through my spinal cord at any second. But he didn’t shoot. He just kept yelling.
This was your warning! You only get one!
I looked at Sly Girl. Her messed-up eye was twitching like crazy. I guess she has a nervous tic or something. I stopped when we got around the corner and lit a smoke. I handed it to her, then lit another for myself.
What the hell was that? she asked.
That was fucked up. That’s what that was.
Sheesh.
I should’ve shot him, I said. My hand shook as I flicked my ash. I should’ve fucking shot him.
No.
Yes!
Just take it easy, Kayos. Nobody’s shootin nobody. We’re gonna go talk to Mac, see what she has to say about all this. Come on, let’s go back to the house. Besides, we need to re-up anyways.
I can’t believe that fucking guy. Who the fuck does he think he is?
He’s Unified Peoples.
So?
So, they’re pretty big, you know. They’ve got property, I guess.
That’s just as much our property as it is his, yo.
She shrugged.
Fuck! I kicked a car tire.
She giggled. Hey, Kayos?
What?
Are you down with OPP?
Huh?
I said, are you down with OPP?
Yeah, you know me.
MERCY
Kayos’s knees vibrated as she sat on the couch, telling us what had gone down.
So, what did you say? Mac asked her.
I said we’ve got just as much right to be down there as he does, and he’d better just step off.
Did he touch you?
No. She looked at Sly Girl
Did he touch you?
No.
Good.
But he said that was our only warning.
Fucker.
We all looked at each other. Sly Girl’s eye was twitching. She and Kayos were both restless, fidgety.
You didn’t say anything about L.C. backing us? Mac asked.
No.
Why not?
I don’t know. Is that everybody’s business?
Well, it’s gonna make it so nobody fucks with us. So yeah, I wouldn’t keep it a secret.
Wouldn’t they already know that because of where we were, though? Kayos asked.
You know what we need, ladies? I said.
What?
We need a publicist.
Mac raised an eyebrow at me.
You know, someone who’s going to get our name out there. Let all the other crews know we’re the real deal, and they can’t just tell us to screw off because there are going to be consequences.
I don’t know, Merce, Mac said. Do we really want to be exposing ourselves like that? I thought we were gonna keep a low profile. Stay out of all the colours and kid’s stuff.
You mean like tags and shit? Kayos asked.
Yeah, tags, but more than that, big pieces too. What we need right now is some street cred. We’re like a brand, right? We have to get our brand name out there. Then we get more customers, more respect and—
More attention from cops.
Aw, fuck the police. Cops never look twice at girls. Do you have any idea all the criminal shit I’ve pulled? All the B & Es, all the frauds, the stolen goods—thousands of dollars of shit. Have I ever once been arrested? Detained? Hell, I’ve never even had a speeding ticket. If the cops get on us about anything, it’s for suspicion of prostitution, but it’s not illegal to be a prostitute, it’s illegal to procure a prostitute’s services, and obviously we’re not pimps, so they can get fucked.
They laughed.
So, did you have anyone in mind for this publicist role? Mac asked.
Yeah, actually.
Who?
Your girl, Z.
Hold up a minute, we don’t know if Z is a girl or a guy.
Well, word on the street is she’s a girl. Little Chinese girl.
Really?
True story.
How’d you find that out?
I’ve got connections …
Mac rolled her eyes. She’d been sitting at home, making crack, counting our money, watching TV, and learning to paint with Bob Ross all month, so she was kind of out of the loop.
I don’t know, Mercy. I’ll have to think about it, she said.
Well, while you’re thinking about it, I’ll set up a meet.
Whatever, she walked out of the room. I hoped she was going to wash the dirty dishes she’d left on the counter for three days.
Yo, do you guys mind if I crash here tonight? Kayos asked. I think I missed the last train. She ducked her head as if she was expecting me to smack her.
Kayos, I said. You’re a Black Rose. This is your place too, okay? You can stay here whenever you want, you don’t have to ask anybody. You have a key, right?
Yeah.
As long as you never bring anyone here, or tell anyone where we live, you can come and go as you please.
Alright, cool. Thanks.
We heard an enormous burp from Mac’s room and we all giggled. I took out my silver cigarette case and offered smokes around. Some drunks in the street were hollering, then singing, and then we heard glass being smashed in the road.
You can sleep in my room if you want, Sly Girl said. It’s quieter in there.
Oh, that’s okay. I’m fine on the couch.
Sly Girl shrugged and went into the bathroom.
Kayos cracked the knuckles of each hand.
Are you okay?
Yeah, yeah, I’m good. Just shook me up a little, you know. I was getting ready to pull out my piece, Mercy, she whispered. For real.
Well, I’m glad you didn’t.
But, I mean, I would have. If I’d had to.
I know.
Z
my frend Ben-E tellz me de$e chix wan2 meet me. Them’s good people, he $ez. You should see what they want.
realee? ur not fuckin w/ me, ryte?
No way!
OK. tell dem i $ed OK.
$o we meet @ da coffee shop across frum Victory Square. wen i walk in dere$ de$e 4 hardCORE lookin chix $ittin in lo chairz by da wyndO. dey $tand up wen i cum ovr. blond 1 $tepz 2wdz me & $tix out her hand. Hi, I’m Mac. her $myle iz quick lyke lightning & $he is da most BeaUtiFUL grrl i have evR $een in my hole lyfe. 4reaL. 4 a minute, i 4get my own name.
Z, i $ay, finalee.
& dere$ dat $myle again. I’ve seen your work around town, it’s really good, $he $ez.
Thanx. my face iz on FYRE! $he likes my werk! $he realee lykes it! i’m lookin @ de$e chix thinkin, wat cood dey po$$iblee want frum me? den i reaLyze, i don’t care wat dey want, i’ll do it. az long az i get 2 C her again.
Do you want a coffee? da brown chick sez.
$ure, a latte.
K. $he hedz 2 da counter.
$o watz all di$ about?
Well, Mac $ays, we were wondering if you’re with a crew?
na, Z fliez $olo.
Would you consider joining one?
OK so dere recrUtin me 4 a $pray cru, problee want a lookout. i get it. dependz, i $ed.
On? da left corner of her mouth iz tuRnin up & reVealin a dimpL in her cheek. evN tho i’m melting in$yde, i’m playin it cool.
on wat i hafta do. watz in it 4 me?
brown chick cums bak w/ lattes 4 evrybudee & $etz em down.
thanx.
No problem. $he $itz down & $tartz talkin. What we’re here to ask you today, Z, $he $ez, is if you would consider joining us.
& who R U?
We are the Black Roses. Have you heard of us?
na. wat R U? a new graff cru?
dey look @ eachoder. No, $ez Mac. $he leanz clo$R 2 me & my neez tingle. We’re a criminal organization.
wat?
A gang.
O.
Yeah.
U mean lyke U.P. & Vipers & $hit?
Right.
nevR herd of U.
Well, that’s the problem we’re hoping you’ll help us solve, brown chick $ez. We want a public presence; we want our name thrown up all over the city.
Y?
Because writing our name on the walls tells the world we’re here, and they can’t ignore us. With all their boundaries and their sanctions and their rules and laws, with all their money and power, we’re still here. And we’re not going away. Our name on the wall proves it.
Y don’t U ju$t do it ur$elve$. Y do U need me?
Because you’re the best, Mac $ed.
i coffed in2 my hand 2 hyde my grin.
MAC
Mercy arranged a meet with this Z person. I told everyone they had to come. I wanted her to know who we were, that she was getting the unique opportunity to become one of us.
So we’re all sitting in the comfy chairs in the corner of Bean Around the World, watching people pass by the window doing the Hastings shuffle.
What if she doesn’t want to join us? Kayos asked. She will.
Is she gonna live with us? Sly Girl asked.
Yeah, if she
wants.
Where will she sleep?
We’ll figure something out.
There were only three tiny bedrooms in the ratty house we rented on Cordova, but I was saving up so we could get a condo uptown, something real nice. A bright home with lots of windows, a balcony, maybe even a view of the mountains. Something far, far away from the hellhole that is the Downtown Eastside. Sometimes it feels like I’ve been waiting my whole life to get out of here, and for the first time, I’m actually getting close.
And let’s agree on something, I said and looked at each of them. If she wants in, this is the last member of the Black Roses. We can’t have this thing getting too big, you know? Or it’ll get out of control. We’ll just keep it to five members, max. That way, everyone knows each other really good, we know we can trust each other, and we can all live together. Agreed?
Yeah, sure.
Okay.
Agreed.
Good.
The other reason I didn’t want more than five people was because we weren’t making enough profit yet to support any more than that and afford a condo. One day soon, I wanted to drive a sweet car, a Corvette or a Porsche. I wanted a diamond choker, and a floor-length leather jacket. I wanted a little dog to carry around in my purse and dress up in little outfits. Just kidding, I didn’t really want a pocket rat, but you get the picture. Feeding, clothing, and housing another girl would seriously cut into my bling funds.
I didn’t feel comfortable managing a huge crew; some people could do it, but never for long. The big street gangs always get taken down, either by mutiny or the cops. I wanted this to stay small and highly efficient. I wanted to be organized. I wanted to be tight. And I wanted each member to be able to reap big rewards, instead of spreading it thin across a bunch of girls. As I was thinking this, a scrawny Chinese girl walked up to us. She was not what I expected a graffiti artist to look like. She had spiky black hair, thick glasses, and Adidas warm-up pants. She was cute as hell.
I stood up first, and everyone else followed my lead. I extended my hand to her. Hi, I’m Mac. Her T-shirt said Support Your Local Hustler. I couldn’t help smiling.
Anatomy of a Girl Gang (9781551525303) Page 4
