A Fox's Maid

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A Fox's Maid Page 17

by Brandon Varnell


  “What was that?!”

  “Ara, ara, I believe that is enough fighting, you two.” Kotohime stopped the fight with her words… and her katana. “You two are beginning to draw a crowd. I dislike crowds, so you won’t fight anymore. Okay?”

  The two took one look at the katana that had been thrust between them, gulped, and then decided to call a temporary truce.

  “O-okay,” Lilian mumbled warily. “We promise not to fight anymore.”

  “What she said,” Christine muttered.

  “Good. Ufufufu…”

  “Does your maid always laugh like that?” Lindsay asked.

  “Sometimes.”

  “It sounds a lot like yours.”

  “U-ugh.” Lilian could practically feel the insult penetrating her like an arrow. “D-does my laugh really sound like that?”

  “No,” Christine said, “it’s worse.”

  Lilian glared, but one look at Kotohime kept her from saying anything.

  After they finished shopping, the group of five walked to the food court. Lilian headed straight for “Fat Fizoli’s Pizza Parlor” and ordered a Sicilian Pizza with all the toppings.

  “I see you’ve decided to take after my son when it comes to pizza,” Ms. Swift commented after they all sat down.

  Christine nearly scowled from her seat next to Lilian. Nearly. She didn’t scowl, but only because her mouth was full of steak burrito. Otherwise she would have. Her scowl would’ve been fierce enough to send all and sundry running for the hills.

  “Of course. Your son has great taste in food.” As if to emphasize her point, Lilian took a large bite of her pizza and moaned in delight. “This really is some of the best food I’ve ever had.”

  “It is also not very healthy for you,” Kotohime informed her ward. “I would advise against eating too much junk food like this.” She took a bite of her salad. “Indulging every now and then is okay, though.”

  Lilian sighed in bliss as she continued eating. Even if she were inclined to get mad at her maid, the incredible burst of flavor on her tongue and the light, fluffy texture of the bread made getting irritated a chore.

  “Don’t worry, I won’t eat more than a single slice whenever I go out, and only on rare occasions. Anymore and I’ll probably get sick anyway. This stuff is really greasy.”

  “Very well,” Kotohime relented after being reassured.

  “Are you going to be alright eating just that, Kotohime?” Ms. Swift asked, glancing at her companion’s sparse chicken salad.

  “Yes, this is enough for me.” Kotohime speared another leaf of lettuce with her fork. “I usually prefer meat to salad, but none of these fast food chains can prepare meat the way I like it. And the so-called ‘Japanese restaurants’ here taste less refined than garbage.”

  Lilian felt a large drop of sweat trail down the left side of her face. Kotohime really didn’t like fast food, it seemed.

  Ms. Swift shrugged. “Well, if you’re sure.”

  “I am, but thank you for your concern.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  Kotohime and Ms. Swift shared a smile, then began to discuss the finer points of fashion versus functionality.

  “Don’t you find it stifling in that kimono?”

  “Not particularly, but that is probably because of my upbringing. Before coming into the service of Lilian-sama’s family, I lived in a small village in Japan. We were a very traditional village. All the women wore kimonos, and the men preferred hakama and haori over modern clothing, so I have been wearing outfits like this my whole life.”

  Of course, the village Kotohime spoke of also happened to be a yōkai village, which explained its traditional setting. As a general rule of thumb, villages comprised solely of yōkai were less technologically advanced and several centuries behind the times when it came to fashion. It had to do with how long-lived yōkai were. Most lived a minimum of five-hundred years or so provided they weren’t killed before then.

  “Really?”

  “Oh, yes. My village was extremely behind the times. Even our customs and traditions were outdated by several hundred years.”

  Lilian almost snorted. She didn’t know much about Kotohime’s past, but she did know that Kotohime was over 400 and had been serving the Pnév̱ma clan for more than two centuries. That meant the four-tails hadn’t been living in the village she spoke of since the late 1800s at least.

  “That would explain why you have the look of a Yamato Nadeshiko.”

  “I’m surprised you know that term.”

  “Hey now, I may not be into Japanese pop culture like my son, but I am aware of some Japanese terms. Yamato Nadeshiko is actually a term we use in the fashion industry.” A pause. “At least, it is in Japan’s fashion industry.”

  “Ara, how interesting.”

  While the adults spoke of fashion, the younger generation (discarding the fact that Lilian was 159 years old), spoke of something else: boys.

  “So Christine, are there any boys you like?” Lindsay asked.

  Christine was very glad she’d not been eating when that question was asked. She would have choked on her food otherwise.

  “A-a b-b-b-boy—O-of course not! Why would I―it’s not like―boys are nothing but perverted idiots―I mean, I could never―”

  Lilian coughed into her hand. “Tsundere.”

  “Shut up, cow tits!”

  “What about you, Lindsay?” asked a curious Lilian. She ignored the insult. Christine had used it so much by this point that any effectiveness it may have possessed had long since worn out.

  “You mean are there any boys that I like?” Lindsay asked for clarification.

  Lilian nodded. “Yeah.”

  “Well, there is one, but I’m sure you already know about that.”

  “Ah, right. I guess I forgot about that.”

  Lindsay’s face became the definition of, “are you serious?”

  “You forgot? Really?”

  Lilian scratched at her head while looking sheepish. “Yeah, I did. Sorry.”

  “Forgot? Forgot what?” Christine asked.

  “Nothing,” Lilian dismissed the goth girl’s question with a wave of her hand.

  “And what about you?” Lindsay asked. “How are you and Kevin doing?”

  Christine turned to spit out her Coke, creating a small puddle on the floor… which someone just happened to walk over seconds after it formed. The poor young man slipped on the spill and slammed head first onto the hard tile floor.

  He didn’t get back up.

  “Man down! Man down! Make way!”

  Christine, Lindsay and Lilian all watched as a pair of paramedics rushed up to the young man and loaded him onto a stretcher. They left soon after.

  “Okay…” Lindsay’s face said that she clearly had no idea what just happened. “That was weird.”

  Christine and Lilian nodded in agreement.

  “I don’t know.” Lilian returned to the topic at hand. “He’s always giving me mixed signals. Sometimes it seems like we’re getting along really well, while others times he acts like he can barely handle being around me.”

  “You mean he’s speaking gibberish?”

  “Yeah, and while I’m sort of grateful, because I know it means he finds me attractive, I wish it would let me know how he feels about me as a person, you know?”

  “Give him some time,” Lindsay said soothingly. “Kevin’s like every other boy when it comes to his feelings, slower than a brick wall and twice as dense. It hasn’t been that long since you two met, barely a month. I’m sure he’s trying to sort out his feelings right now, and that’s why he keeps sending mixed signals.”

  “I guess.” Lilian took a bite of her Sicilian pizza, but found her enjoyment of it waning. It tasted bland now.

  “What makes you think Kevin even likes Lilian?” asked a scowling Christine.

  Lindsay raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean? It’s obvious that he likes Lilian.”

  “That’s right,” Lilian nod
ded decisively. “He wouldn’t be afflicted by Gibberish of Love if he didn’t like me.”

  “Gibberish of what now?”

  Lindsay ran a hand down her face while Christine just looked confused.

  Lilian shot the goth girl a sly grin. “Why do you look so displeased? Are you jealous?”

  “J-j-j-j-jealous?!” Christine shrieked. Lilian and Lindsay winced at the shrill noise. “O-of course not! Why the hell would I be jealous?!”

  “I don’t know.” Lilian recovered from the shriek and shrugged. “You tell me? I mean, it’s not like you like Kevin or anything, right?”

  “T-t-that’s right.” Christine latched onto Lilian’s words like they were a life raft. “I do like him―I mean, I don’t! I don’t like him! I could never like that stupid, insensitive jerk! Hmph!”

  Christine must have gained several levels in tsundere since their last meeting, Lilian concluded. She was acting even more belligerent than before.

  “Now this is a surprise,” a voice spoke up from behind the squabbling girls. “Who in their right mind would have thought you and I would bump into each other here, of all places.”

  Every head present snapped towards the new voice. Lilian’s eyes widened, Christine scowled, Kotohime raised an eyebrow, while Lindsay and Ms. Swift merely appeared curious.

  “It’s you!”

  Lilian shot to her feet and pointed at the intruder with a quivering finger. She could feel her breathing beginning to hitch. Phantom aches and pains appeared on her chest and legs. Her vision grew blurry as she tried not to let herself be overcome by fear.

  “Hello, Lilian,” Kiara greeted in a mild, polite tone of voice, as if she hadn’t beaten the utter living crap out of Lilian two weeks ago.

  Lilian tried scowling at the woman, but was unsuccessful. “What are you doing here?”

  “Relaxing on my day off, of course,” Kiara answered in a “it should be obvious” tone of voice. “I don’t have any work or board meetings to attend right now, so I figured I’d wander the mall for a bit and buy a few essentials.” She raised a single eyebrow at Lilian. “Is that a problem?”

  Lilian worked her mouth, trying to say something, anything. However, no matter how many times she opened her mouth, nothing came out. Not a word, syllable, or even a squeak.

  Kiara chuckled. “Now, now, there’s no need to scared of me. I won’t bite.”

  “I-I’m not scared of you.”

  “Why don’t you say that after you stop shaking?”

  Everyone looked to see that Lilian was, indeed, trembling. Her entire body seemed to be undergoing visible muscle spasms. She looked like a twig caught in a hurricane. All those present wondered what this woman had done to earn such a reaction from the normally cheerful and vibrant girl. Christine had a guess, but she wasn’t about to draw unwanted attention to herself.

  “Kiara?” Kotohime looked surprised for a moment, but then, like rays of sunlight parting the clouds, a surprisingly pleasant smile appeared. “I almost didn’t recognize you. You’ve changed your hairstyle.”

  Kiara twirled a strand of her short, choppy hair between her fingers.

  “I thought it was time to get rid of all that hair. It always got in the way whenever I was fighting.” She glanced at Kotohime’s own long, raven locks. “I don’t know how you fight with such long hair.”

  Kotohime hid a smile behind the sleeve of her kimono. “Oh, I’ve learned to accommodate for it. Ufufufu…”

  Kiara’s grin was rife with amusement. “I’ll bet you have.”

  “Would you care to join us for lunch?”

  “Hiiii!”

  “Thanks, but I think I’ll pass for today.” Kiara’s eyes twinkled with barely concealed mirth. “I wouldn’t want to frighten your charge any more than I already have.”

  An amused glance at Lilian revealed that the twin-tailed beauty had taken to hiding behind Christine. She peeked out from over the snow maiden’s shoulder, her wide eyes reminding Kiara of a frightened child who’d just seen her first horror movie.

  “Oi! Get the hell away from me, you skanky fox! Gods, you’re such a fraidy cat!”

  “I-I’m not a fraidy cat! Don’t confuse me with some measly neko!” Lilian tried to defend herself. Considering she was hiding behind the girl she’d been arguing with awhile ago and stuttering, her words didn’t hold much weight. “I just… want to eat over here instead.”

  Kotohime raised a single, delicate eyebrow in Lilian’s direction, before turning to Kiara with a question in her eyes. “Dare I ask what you did to make Lilian-sama so frightened of you?”

  “Oh, we just had a minor altercation.” Kiara waved her hand as if swatting at a fly. “But don’t worry, it’s all been fixed now.”

  “You call what happened to me minor?”

  Lilian didn’t know whether to be displeased or relieved at being considered “minor.”

  “Of course. If our dispute had been more serious, you wouldn’t have gotten off as lightly as you did.”

  “Eep!”

  Lilian hid behind Christine again.

  She was definitely going with relieved.

  ***

  “Hey, Kevin, how do you know this weird pompadour kid?”

  “I don’t know him,” Kevin scowled.

  He and Juan stood in front of the basketball arcade game, both prepared to start their competition. If Juan won, Kevin would have to let the matador boy ask Lilian out on a date. If Kevin won, Juan would stop bothering him and Lilian. This wasn’t something he wanted to do, making a bet like this, but he consoled himself with the knowledge that Lilian would never agree to go on a date with Juan.

  Kevin still cursed himself for allowing Juan to decide what game they played first, though. Did pompadour boy know that shooting hoops was something he was notoriously bad at? Probably, but it was too late to turn back now.

  Eric and Justin stood on either side of Kevin, but the twins were still off arguing about… something. He wasn’t sure if they even knew what they were arguing about anymore, but the last he saw of them, it looked like their fight would come to blows at the slightest provocation.

  “If you don’t know him, then why are you facing off against him?” Eric’s expression was the kind people gave when they thought someone was being an idiot. “Especially in a hoop shooting competition. Everyone knows you suck at basketball.”

  “I know that.” Kevin’s scowl deepened. “I’m well aware of how bad I am at shooting hoops. You don’t have to rub it in.”

  “Hey, don’t get mad at me. I’m just saying that you shouldn’t have let him sucker you into letting him pick the first game.”

  “… Shut up.”

  “Is there a problem?” Juan smirked at him, and in that moment, Kevin knew that his nemesis was perfectly aware of his lack of talent when it came to shooting baskets.

  “No,” Kevin lied. “There’s no problem.”

  “Good. Then let us begin.”

  The buzzer went off and the gates rose, allowing the basketballs to roll towards them. The competition had begun.

  It immediately became clear that neither of them was very good at basketball. However, between the two, Juan was noticeably better. For every one basket that Kevin made, Juan made at least two, sometimes even three.

  By the time they reached the halfway mark, Kevin was sweating bullets. He looked at Juan as the other boy shot a basket that went in. Deciding that he needed to catch up to his rival, Kevin shot the ball in his hand, grabbed the next ball and shot that one, too. Over and over again he shot balls at the hoop, the rate at which he did so increasing in an attempt to catch up to Juan’s score.

  All of them missed.

  Kevin glanced over at Juan, who’d made another six baskets. The olive-skinned boy saw him looking and sent a smug grin his way that seemed to say, “you will never catch up to me.” He gritted his teeth and began shooting balls even faster.

  Unfortunately, his hands had become slick with sweat. One of the balls he shot slip
ped from his grasp and beamed some poor boy in the head, knocking him unconscious.

  “Oh, my God! They killed Kenny!”

  “No, he’s not dead. Just unconscious.”

  “Oh… phew. What a relief.”

  By the time the buzzer went off, the score was a lopsided 42:7.

  “It looks like this is my win,” Juan said with a triumphant smirk. Once Kevin got over his shock at being beaten so thoroughly―though he honestly shouldn’t have been that surprised―he glared at the other teen.

  “This isn’t over yet. Don’t forget that I get to choose the next challenge.”

  “So you do, but it will not matter.” Juan’s grin made Kevin twitchy. What he wouldn’t give to sock this matador costume-wearing boy in the face! “No matter the game you choose, I will win.”

  Kevin’s eyes narrowed. “We’ll see.”

  The next challenge was a police simulation game, one that offered several types of shooting range scenarios. The best part about the game―to Kevin―was its dual-wielding feature.

  “I hope you’re ready to lose,” Kevin said to Juan, two plastic guns already in hand.

  Juan looked at Kevin through squinted eyes. “The only one who is going to be losing this day is you.”

  He and Juan stared at each other, the ozone crackling as their hatred manifested on the physical planes of reality. Tendrils of lightning arced between them, striking the ground and making several people skitter away. Behind them, Eric and Justin stared.

  “… Inu… pissing…”

  “No kidding,” Eric agreed, “I’m not sure what’s more surprising; the fact that Kevin is actually getting into a fight because of a girl, or that there’s someone in this world with such an atrocious sense of fashion. I mean, I’m no fashionista or whatever, but even I know that outfit just sucks.”

  Only after he said this, did Eric catch Justin’s comment.

  “Wait. What did you say?”

  Justin merely tilted his head, his half-lidded eyes holding the same apathy they always did.

  Eric sighed. “If I didn’t know you so well, I’d think you were insane, what with all the weird, random crap you say.”

  “… Bad?”

  “I guess not,” Eric shrugged, before realizing something. “Hey, I just noticed, we’re missing Alex and Andrew. Where are they?”

 

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