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Narrative Poems

Page 13

by C. S. Lewis


  Of admirals dead; out of thy smothering caves

  Where colour is not, up, to where the waves

  Turn emerald and the edge of ocean-cold

  Is yielding,10 and the fish go slashed with gold,

  Up!, ’gainst thy nature, up!, put on again

  Colour and form and be to waking men290

  Things visible. Heave all! Softly . . . it rears

  Its dripping head. What, Lords? At last? Your ears

  Remember now that song, those giant words,

  Louder than woods that thundered, scattering birds

  Like leaves along the sky, and whose the throats

  Louder than cedars there whipt flat as oats . . .

  Birds tumbled . . . the sky dipped . . .’

  The Queen’s voice broke.

  Heavily, in that moment, like the stroke

  Of an axe11 falling, came the sight and sense300

  Of those about her: the long room, packed dense,

  Her voice yet stirring echoes in the corners,

  Dull, puzzled eyes, the patient smile of scorners,

  Face behind unintelligible face,

  Arms nudging and heads whispering in each place

  Save where she looked. Then twice she made endeavour,

  Grasped the great moment’s virtue: gone forever:

  Struggling to speak. Then (curses on the frame

  Of woman!) her breast shook, and scalding came

  Tears of deep rage. Bit thro’ the lip, clench hand,310

  —All’s vain. And now she saw the Archbishop stand

  Beside her, whispering, ‘Daughter . . . come away.’

  Heard the King’s voice, ‘The Queen’s not well12 to-day.’

  CANTO II

  They dine at ten to three1 in Drum;

  At four the full decanters come

  And, heavy with dark liquor, pass

  Down the long tables polished smooth as glass,

  In dark red rooms where the piled curtains sweep

  Wine-coloured carpets ankle deep.

  (Outside, the thrush sings: unobserved, the flowers

  Drop petals through those silent2 hours.)

  The King, too tired to drink his wine in state,

  Was with the Chancellor tête-à-tête.10

  The Chancellor who with punctual sip

  Raised his full glass to bloodless lip

  A moment later than his master

  In perfect time, now slow, now faster.

  The tiptoe servants from the room

  Stole reverently as from a tomb;

  The door closed softly as the settling wing

  Of pigeons in a wood. The King

  Threw off his wig and wiped his glistening head

  And, ‘Where’s she now?’ he said.20

  ‘The Queen, Sir? Since we left the Council board

  I think she’s mewed up somewhere with my lord

  Archbishop.’

  ‘With old Daddy? Likely enough . . .

  Do you suppose, now, he believes that stuff?’

  ‘Daddy believe her? Oh Lord, Sir, not he!

  Least of us all, Sir; less than you and me.’

  ‘Why, as for that—fill up, fill both the glasses.

  Steenie, your health! you understand . . . what passes

  Between us—mum’s the word. We two together30

  Have come through many a storm and change of weather.

  In confidence, now; tell me what you made

  This morning of our loving wife’s tirade?’

  ‘Me, Sir? I think the Queen . . . has startled Drum

  Excessively. She’ll have her following; some

  Will doubtless—’

  ‘I’m not asking what she’ll do

  To others, man, but what she’s done to you.

  Your glass is empty.’

  ‘Well Sir, if you must.40

  Thank you. No more! Your Majesty . . . I trust

  I may be pardoned if I hesitate;

  The failure of our plan . . . the whole debate

  Turned upside down . . . has thrown me in such doubt,

  I looked to your advice to lead us out.’

  ‘At least, you haven’t passed it with a sneer

  Like Daddy. You perceive there’s . . . something . . . here?’

  ‘Oh, not like Daddy, Sir. I’m humbler far.

  These churchmen, in the bulk—’

  ‘Why, there you are!50

  That’s what I say. For if there were such things,

  Some secret stairs and undiscovered wings

  In the world’s house, dark vacancies between

  The rooms we know—behind the public scene

  Some inner stage . . . if such things could be so,

  The man who wears a mitre’s paid to know

  Or to invent it, eh? Of all men living

  He’s the least right to pass without misgiving.’

  ‘Oh very true. I see, Sir. After all,

  We might in sleep be more than we recall60

  On waking?’

  ‘Easy enough to talk at large

  And laugh at her: but who’ll refute the charge?

  Like a puffed candle-flame at half past ten

  My world goes out: at nine, perhaps, again

  I find it . . .’

  ‘Yes indeed. And in between

  No one can tell us where or what we’ve been.’

  ‘Ah! There’s the stickler, eh? We understand,

  You and I, Steenie. Fill your glass. Your hand!70

  We don’t remember.’

  ‘Yet . . . there’s times, at waking,

  One feels one has just failed in overtaking

  Something . . . you can’t say what . . . already, as your eyes

  First catch it, shuffling on its day’s disguise.’

  ‘I know, Steenie. Like on the hills, if one

  White cotton-tail has flashed, the mischief’s done;

  Where you saw nothing, now you see the ground

  Alive with rabbits half a mile around,

  And all betrayed by one. So one queer thought80

  Peeps from the edge of sleep, and there you’ve caught

  The implication of a thousand others,

  And then . . . you’re wide awake. Common sense smothers

  The trail of the fugitives.’

  ‘But if one delves

  As deep as that . . .’

  ‘Speak out: only ourselves

  Will hear you.’

  ‘Why . . . your Majesty has such a way!

  I’m in an odd, confessing mood to-day.90

  I hardly know . . . it’s strange we’ve never spoken

  Of things like that . . . he-he! . . . I think the Queen has broken

  Our dams all down—’

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘I said, the Queen

  Had opened all the doors: that is, I mean—’

  ‘That wasn’t what you said.’

  ‘I said, the Queen

  Had broken in the dams.’

  ‘Oh, very good!100

  Excellent . . . dykes in Holland . . . and the flood,

  Disnatured for a hundred years, sighs-off the chain,

  Easing its heart, and floods the land again.

  I’ll tell you what I feel . . . I think I know

  How it would feel to be a man of snow

  Set in the sunlight . . . yes: that’s how I feel—

  Deliciously soft liquefactions steal

  Round the stiff corselet where we’ve frozen in

  The fluid soul, so long . . . and drops begin

  To hollow out warm caves and paths . . . but you,110

  You said, if one delved deep—?’

  ‘Why, if you do,

  Well, frankly—in such glances—well, by God!

  I’ve fished up things that were extremely odd.’

  ‘I know the kind (come, drink about) and Daddy

  Had reasons to ignore it.’

  ‘Reasons, had he?


  You mean he knows?’

  ‘He guesses well enough

  That back there on the borderland there’s stuff120

  Not marked on any map their sermons show

  —They keep one eye shut just because they know—

  Don’t we all know?

  At bottom?—that this World in which we draw

  Our salaries, make our bows, and keep the law,

  This legible, plain universe we use

  For waking business, is a thing men choose

  By leaving out . . . well, much; our editing,

  (With expurgations) of some larger thing?

  Well, then, it stands to reason; go behind130

  To the archetypal scrawl, and there you’ll find

  . . . Well . . . variant readings, eh? And it won’t do

  Being over-dainty there.’

  ‘That’s very true.

  Can’t wear kid gloves.’

  ‘Once in a way, perhaps,

  ’s pardonable—wholesome even—to relapse.

  You never feel it, yet this keeping hold

  Year after year . . . eh? . . . that’s what makes us old.

  Now when one was a boy . . . do you remember140

  (You’d have been twelve that year) one warm September

  Under those laurels, with the keeper’s dog

  And the gypsy girl—the day we killed the frog?’

  ‘Boys will be boys, Sir! By your leave again,

  I’ll fill your glass and mine. But now we’re men

  How can you reach . . . how does the Queen contrive

  To keep the memory of her nights alive

  Though we’ve forgotten?’

  ‘Why—plague on her—she

  Goes thither in the body.’150

  ‘Didn’t we?

  I put a bold face on while she was making

  Her speech this morning: but a knee-cap aching

  And a bruised shin kept running in my head.

  The devil!—how should knees get knocks in bed?’

  ‘That’s sympathetic magic . . . like Saint Francis . . .

  Stigmata . . . when the Subtle Body dances

  Ten miles away, you feel the palpitations.

  . . . Like the wax doll for witches’ incantations.

  That fortune-telling man they whipped and branded.160

  What was his name?’

  ‘Oh he was caught red-handed.

  The floating lady and the flying tambourine . . .

  All done by wires, Sir, Jesseran3 you mean?

  Why, if he’s still alive, he’s down below

  Under the castle here. They loved him so

  The people, and believed him; he was tried

  In secret. But beyond all doubt he’s died.

  It’s down to water level, under clay,

  The dungeons of your father’s father’s day—170

  No one could live. The keepers hardly know

  The way down; and it’s twenty years ago.’

  ‘I’ll dig him up, though. For our present game,

  Living or dead, he might be much the same.

  What?—never stare. I thought you understood.

  Help me up, Steenie. So! I’m in the mood

  For a frolic. Are those dams all down? Oh brave!

  Trol-de-rol-trol! The emalgipated slave . . .

  Wouldn’t a lobster, now, feel more than well

  If some kind friend unbuttoned ’m from ’s shell!180

  That’s how I feel. Hey, Steenie, watch your legs.

  Let’s have a song.’

  ‘This way, Sir. ’Ware the table.

  I hold it, Sir, most seriously,

  Both treasonous and treasonable,

  Privatus homo, subjects such as me,

  When Majesty is drunk, in contrariety

  To flaunt an illegalical sobriety.’

  ‘Excellent! Have that in the statute book.

  Steenie . . . my old, old friend . . . how beautiful you look.190

  We’ll go to the dungeons, eh?’

  ‘Absolutely deeper.

  To the centre of the earth. We’ll wake the sleeper.

  Trumpets there!’

  ‘We’ll sing charms and ride on brooms

  We’ll fetch the dead men out of tombs,

  We’ll get with child the mountain hags

  And ride the cruels of the crags . . .

  How gardens love it when the gardener’s eye

  ’s wi’drawn a month, and ten feet high200

  The weeds foam round the cottage door . . .

  Their dykes are down . . . the tide returns once more.

  Liberty! Liberty! as the duchess says

  Each night when they undo her stays.

  Remember how the iambic goes?

  ’EΠιλελήσμεθ´ ἡδέως.4

  Open the door there! Both! The other wing!

  My lordge—The King is drunk; long live the King!’

  CANTO III

  The dungeon stair interminably round and round

  Draws on the King and Chancellor far underground

  To his ancestral prison-house. And in the tower

  The Queen and the Archbishop in her airy bower

  Sit talking; the frail, slender tower that overlooks

  Meadows and wheeling windmills and meandering brooks

  Five miles towards the mountains of the spacious west.

  The mountains swell towards them like a woman’s breast,

  Their winding valleys, bountiful like opened hands,

  Spread out their green embracement to the lower lands,10

  The pines on the peak’d ridges, like the level hair

  Of racing nymphs are stretched on the clear western air.

  Often she looked towards them and her eyes were brightened,

  And her pulse quickened, her brow lightened;

  And often at the old man’s voice she turned her head,

  And each time more impatiently. ‘My lord,’ she said,

  ‘If you had laughed me down like all the rest,

  I would have understood. But you’ve confessed

  Such things may be. Then what we both believe

  You’d keep a secret?’—‘Lest I should deceive,’20

  Said he, ‘I hold my tongue. Truths may be such

  That when they have cooled and hardened at the touch

  Of language, they turn errors. So our speech

  Fails us, and waking discourse cannot reach

  The thing we are in dreams. Alas, my Queen,

  What Spirit, while nature sleeps, has done or seen,

  If told at morning, fades like fairy wealth,

  And in its place the changeling comes by stealth,

  The dapper lie, more marketable far

  Than truth, the maid. Daughter, I think you are30

  Willingly no deceiver. What you meant

  To-day was truth; but all that truth was spent

  Before you said ten words. What followed after

  —All the wild tale you told of storm and laughter

  And hunting on the hills—all this . . . (good now

  On your salvation, never change your brow,

  Soft! Softly! Quench those eyes)

  All this, by a plain word, was it not lies?’

  ‘How lies my lord, when all the talk of Drum

  Vouches my wanderings real? Play fairly. Come!40

  That I’ve gone there, is known; that I’ve met you

  When you were also there, is that not true?’

  ‘Have I been in that place? (We’ll call it so

  Though wrongly) . . . have I? . . . child, I do not know.

  Sometimes I think I have. I am uncertain.

  Ask me not. If a man could lift the curtain

  The half-inch that’s beyond all price—but none

  Can tell, being wakened, what the night has done.’

  Her scorn leaped quickly at him. ‘If you know

  Thus little of the lands to which
I go,50

  How can you call my tale of them untrue?

  Give me the lie who can! so cannot you.’

  ‘This is but baby’s talk,’ he said, ‘Indeed

  We cannot lift the curtain at our need,

  It is immovable, but lights come through.

  We know not—we remember that we knew.’

  And then he paused, and ruefully he smiled

  Fondling his knee with thoughtful hand; and, ‘Child,’

  He said, ‘How can it profit us to talk

  Much of that region where you say you walk.60

  We are not native there: we shall not die

  Nor live in elfin country, you and I.

  Greatly I fear lest, wilfully refusing

  Beauty at hand, you walk dark roads to find it,

  Impatient of dear earth because behind it

  You dream of phantom worlds, forever losing

  What is more wonderful—too strange indeed

  For you—too dry a flavour for the greed

  Of uncorrected palates; this sweet form

  Of day and night, the stillness and the storm,70

  Children, the changing year, the growing god

  That springs, by labour, out of the turn’d sod.’

  ‘I have no child,’ she said, ‘What mockery is this,

  What jailor’s pittance offered in the prison of earth,

  To that unbounded appetite for larger1 bliss

  Not born with me, but older than my mortal birth? . . .

  When shall I be at home? When shall I find my rest?

  My lord, you have lived happy and with cause have blessed

  This world’s habitual highway, where you walk at ease;

  I walk not, but go naked upon bleeding knees.80

  And if this threadbare vanity of days, this lean

  And never-ceasing world were all—if I must lose

  The air that breathes across it from the land I’ve seen,

  About my neck tonight I’d slip the noose

  And end the longing. But it is not so;

  And you—your words have half revealed—you know,

  And will not tell. Oh pity, pity I crave

  (This thirst will burn my body in the rotting grave)

  Speak to me, father! tell me all the truth, confess!

  Give me a plain No or an honest Yes.90

  Have you too found the way to such a place,

  And in it have we all met face to face?’

  ‘Peace, peace! Beware!’

  ‘Of what should I beware?

  What is the crucifixion that I would not dare,

  To find my home? (When shall my rest be won?)

  Why do you turn away: What have I done?’

  ‘Almost crushed dead, I fear, on your own breast

  With hot, rough, greedy hands what you love best.

  It will not thus be wooed. You will not find100

 

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