He took a deep breath before speaking.
“Well, the truth is, it looks like I’m doing this for you, but I’m really doing it for myself. It’s not selfless, Autumn. This is something I’m taking for myself, because it feels right, and I feel like I’ve earned it. I’ve spent a lot of time in my life helping people, and often they were people I didn’t necessarily want to help. This time, I’m picking the one person I know I want to help more than I’ve ever wanted anything. I want to do this. I want to do this for you. And this time, I’m taking what I want.”
“What you want?” Autumn said uncertainly.
“I’m not asking you for anything in return. Don’t worry. I don’t expect you to repay the favor or anything. I just mean, out of all the things I could be doing right now, this is the thing I want most. And I’m not going to let anything stop me from being here, with you, doing this.”
Autumn looked at him. She had no idea what to say. What did he mean? He wanted this for himself? He wanted to help her more than he wanted anything else?
What was that?
Did it mean he liked her?
That he wanted her?
Or just that he wanted to do something good with his life and his money?
“Well, Grady, I don’t know what to say to that exactly, but I will say this. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”
CHAPTER 23
GRADY
They drove the rest of the day and when he started to get tired, Grady pulled off the highway for a motel. It wasn’t any place special, just an ordinary sixty dollar a night motel you might see at any highway exit, but to Grady it was the nicest place he’d ever seen.
The reason it was so nice to him was that for the first time since he’d found out he was going to be a father, things felt right. He felt like he had a family under his wing. A baby and a woman. And not just any woman, a good woman, one who cared about him and his child. He knew Autumn wasn’t Destiny’s mother, he knew they weren’t even a couple, but none of that seemed to matter. All that mattered was that the three of them were together.
They went into the office, Grady carrying the luggage and Autumn carrying the child, a light snow falling from the sky. It was almost Christmas and the three of them checking into the motel reminded Grady of the story of Mary and Joseph in Bethlehem, searching for an inn.
“We need two rooms,” Grady said to the man at the reception.
“Sorry, mister, we’ve only got one left.”
Grady looked at Autumn a little awkwardly. “Oh, well, I don’t know, is there another motel nearby?”
“Not in this town,” he said. “Which way you headed?”
“East.”
The man shrugged. “I don’t know, I don’t think you’ll find much for a while.”
“How many beds in the room?” Grady said.
“One king.”
Grady looked at Autumn and she gave him a small, almost imperceptible nod.
“We’ll take it,” he said.
They checked in and Grady asked the man if there was anywhere they might buy some clothes and toiletries.
“There’s a Walmart just down the street. A few restaurants and gas stations too.”
“That will have to do,” Grady said.
The man gave them a key and led the way down the corridor to their room.
“It’s not much,” he said, opening the door, “but it’s all we have available.”
They went inside and Grady threw his bag on the bed.
“It’s perfect,” he said to the man and he nodded and left.
Grady looked at Autumn and shrugged.
“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he said. “You and the baby need a decent place to spend the night. I’ll sleep outside in the car.”
A flash of worry crossed Autumn’s face.
“No,” she said, and it was the loudest he’d ever heard her say anything.
“You don’t want me to sleep in the car?”
“It wouldn’t feel right,” she said.
“Autumn, I’m a thirty year old man. You’re what?”
“Nineteen,” she said, reminding him.
“It wouldn’t be right for me to take advantage of the situation.”
“You’re not taking advantage,” she said. “We’re just sharing a room because it’s all there is. I don’t want to sleep in here without you. I don’t want you in the car.”
Grady looked at her. He felt guilty just being in the room with her. She was so good, so lovely. She was too beautiful to be stuck in a motel room with the likes of him.
He felt a throb of desire at the thought of spending the night with her, even if nothing happened. Even if they just shared the room, her on the bed and him on the armchair by the television. She was beautiful, truly beautiful, an angel sent from heaven to ease his aching heart.
“Well, lets talk about it later. First we need to go buy you a few things to wear, and get something to eat.”
They left their things in the room and went back to the car. A minute later they were pulling up outside the Walmart.
They went inside and bought Autumn some basic clothes, clean underwear and socks, toiletries, makeup and perfume. Grady was adamant she get everything she could possibly need.
“I’m not used to having a lady like you around,” he said. “I don’t have the first clue what you need. I just don’t want you to be going without.”
Autumn smiled as she picked out soap, shampoo, conditioner, lotion, Q-tips, a toothbrush.
“That’s enough,” she said.
“Come on,” Grady insisted, “what about all this stuff?”
He was pointing at the women’s underwear section.
Autumn giggled but picked out the nicest things they had. Grady found his mind wandering to what she’d look like in the black panties and stockings but he forced himself not to. By the time she was done, they’d practically filled the cart with everything a girl could possibly need. Before going to the checkout, he grabbed some fresh white towels and a weekend bag so she’d have somewhere to pack all her new stuff.
“What are the towels for?” she asked.
“I don’t know. I heard that girls didn’t like using motel towels.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, isn’t that a thing?”
“Not that I’ve ever heard,” Autumn said, “but then, I’ve never really stayed anywhere before.”
Grady shrugged. They paid for the things and put them in the car.
“Now, where do you want to eat?” Grady said, indicating the selection of roadside eateries in front of them.
“What about the Italian one?” Autumn said.
Grady smiled. “Good choice.”
They went into the restaurant and it was a little fancier than they’d been expecting. The tables had white cloths on them, there was a bar at one side of the restaurant with big mirrors behind it and every drink imaginable, and the candles on the tables gave the place a romantic feel.
Evidently, they also gave the place a sleepy feel because Destiny fell asleep almost as soon as they sat down. Autumn was holding her and Grady told her to wait at the table while he went back out to the car. He came back with the car seat and a blanket and they set Destiny up in a little bed so she’d be comfortable while they ate.
He took his seat and looked across the table at Autumn. The sight before him took his breath away. Her eyes sparkled in the candlelight like jewels. Her face was calm and happy. She was the prettiest thing he’d ever set eyes on and he felt a longing that seemed to pull at his chest and put butterflies in his stomach.
He looked down at the menu to avoid staring into Autumn’s stunning eyes.
“I’m starving,” he said.
“Me too.”
“Looks like the food’s good,” Grady said, eyeing up the plates of some other diners. “I think I’ll get the steak.”
“I’m getting spaghetti and meatballs,” Autumn said. “It’s my favorite.”
“And what about something to drink? How about some wine?”
“Really?” she said.
Grady couldn’t help it. He wanted this to be like a date. He wanted it to be special. He wasn’t sure what Autumn thought of it, but for him it was the first time in a very long time that he’d been sitting at a table with a beautiful woman he had such strong feelings for. It was the first time in as long as he could remember that he’d been this excited about anything. And it was just a meal.
The waitress came over and asked what they wanted to drink.
“Do you have champagne?” Grady asked.
The waitress smiled. “Yes we do, sir.”
“We’ll have two glasses to start, and with dinner how about some red wine?”
The waitress showed him the list and he chose a bottle of the most expensive wine they had.
“Coming right up,” the waitress said.
She returned with their champagne and took their dinner orders. Grady sipped his drink and despite having been at some of the fanciest restaurants in the country, he’d never tasted anything so delicious or intoxicating in his life.
“You like it?” he said to Autumn.
She nodded. “You’re a very good host,” she said.
Grady smiled. He was afraid he was blushing. There was something about Autumn that disarmed him. It made him feel like he was eighteen again, on his very first date, nervous as a schoolboy. He’d been with his share of women, but it had never been like this.
This was what all the fuss was about, he realized.
He’d seen the same romantic movies everyone else watched, he’d read the same books. He knew the world made a big deal about romance, about love, about the powerful attraction that two people could feel for each other when everything was right. And he’d always rolled his eyes. He never thought it was real, or that it was worth the fuss people made of it.
Until this very moment, sipping his champagne, looking into Autumn’s sweet face.
“Can I ask you something personal?” he said.
She nodded.
“I don’t want to embarrass you.”
“You won’t,” she said, enjoying her drink.
“Is there someone in your life? A man, I mean?”
Autumn blushed. She shook her head and looked down at the table. Grady felt bad for embarrassing her and luckily the waitress arrived with their food and brought the moment to an end. She offered them freshly ground pepper, which they both accepted, and an older waiter in a black suit with white shirt brought over their bottle of wine and offered Grady a taste.
Grady nodded that it was perfect, the waiter poured two glasses, and they were alone again.
“Why did you ask me that?” Autumn said.
“Just being nosy, I guess,” Grady said. “I mean, it’s not every day I come across a woman as lovely as you.”
Autumn blushed again, looked away, and then glanced back at him.
He was still doing it, making the moment awkward, but he couldn’t help it. He had to know about her. He had to know if there was a man in her life. He had to tell her she was lovely, because it was the truth.
He wasn’t trying to pick her up. He wasn’t trying to charm her. He’d done that a million times to other women and it never made him shy or nervous. He knew he was attractive to women and he could usually read them like a book.
But with Autumn, it was like all his skills, all his experience, had come to nought. He was as vulnerable as he would have been if this was the very first girl he’d ever liked. Because when all was said and done, she was.
“Lovely?” Autumn said shyly.
Grady nodded.
“I’m sorry for embarrassing you, Autumn. It’s just, I’m the kind of man who calls a spade a spade. I never was able to hold my peace when there was something important I wanted to say. It’s gotten me into more trouble in my life than you’d ever imagine.”
Autumn looked at him as she twirled her fork in her spaghetti.
“Well, if we’re being honest, I should say you’re not too bad yourself, Grady Cole.”
Grady was chewing some steak and he laughed. “I don’t know about that.”
“It’s true,” Autumn said, holding his gaze.
“That’s kind of you to say.”
“Grady, I mean it. You must know that already.”
Grady couldn’t understand why he was being so shy, so coy. He was never like this with women. He knew it was because until this moment, there’d never been anything important at stake.
“I guess I’m a type,” he said. “A lot of women like the rugged, muscular, tattooed look.”
“A lot of women?” Autumn said, laughing. “I’d say it’s pretty much every woman that ever lived.”
“Not every woman,” Grady said, looking at her intently.
He thought back to the last woman he’d been with. She was a drug addict and had more problems than most, and that was precisely the type of woman Grady thought he belonged with. A girl like Autumn, someone kindhearted and sweet and so pretty it physically caused him pain when he looked at her, would never fall for his charms. He was sure of that.
He cleared his throat. “There’s a whole world of women out there who would take one look at a man like me and run a million miles in the opposite direction.”
Autumn looked surprised.
“You don’t believe me?” Grady said.
“Well, I guess there are some women who wouldn’t like you.”
“Take you for instance,” Grady said.
“Me?”
“Well, I’m practically old enough to be your father.”
Autumn laughed. “Please,” she said.
“It’s true.”
“I’ll be twenty in a few weeks. You’re thirty. That’s not old enough to be my father.”
“Well, it feels like it could be.”
“Well it couldn’t,” she said, standing her ground.
“Plus, I’ve got a baby. That’s a lot of baggage.”
“Destiny isn’t baggage, Grady. She’s a gift.”
Grady looked at her. “Do you really think that?”
Autumn nodded. “Absolutely.”
Grady stared at her and no matter how hard he tried to look away, he couldn’t. She simply took his breath away.
“Besides,” she said at last, “you can’t possibly be saying that you’ve ever had a hard time finding women.”
Grady shrugged. “True.”
“I bet they line up for you.”
He laughed.
“Take our waitress for instance. I saw the way she looked at you.”
Grady glanced over at the waitress. It was true. He could have bedded her in minutes if he cared to try.
“Tell me this, Grady Cole. Have you ever had a waitress in your life that didn’t ask you where you were from, or where you were headed, or anything to strike up a conversation?”
Grady threw up his hands, but Autumn went on, her passions riled up by the direction the conversation had taken.
“Me on the other hand. I’m a different story.”
“You should be glad you’re a different story.”
“Oh really. I should be glad I’ve never had a boyfriend? I should be glad I’ve never had sex? I should be glad that no man has ever so much as looked twice at me?”
“I can tell you right now that ain’t true.”
“Well it feels true, Grady. I feel completely invisible. I feel like men take one look at me and all they see is a little girl.”
“They don’t see that.”
“Even you see me that way,” she said. “I know you do.”
Grady laughed. There was some truth to what she was saying, but it wasn’t the way she thought. Men might not hit on a girl like Autumn as soon as she walked into a bar, but it was only because deep down, within every man, there was a core value, a respect, a knowledge that something that beautiful shouldn’t be taken for granted.
A man couldn’t walk up to the mos
t beautiful creature he’d ever seen and tell her what he wanted. It was like walking into a church and handing the priest a list of demands. A man doesn’t tell God what he wants, he prays. There’s a difference. And a man doesn’t tell a beautiful woman what he wants.
He falls in love.
CHAPTER 24
GRADY
By the time they got back to the motel, Grady and Autumn were both tipsy.
“I’m going to take a quick shower,” Autumn said.
Grady nodded and put Destiny in the bed. He decided he’d let Autumn share the bed with the baby and he’d sleep in the armchair. He stripped down to his boxer shorts and found the extra blankets in the closet. He took one to the chair and lowered himself into it, far more tired than he’d realized.
No sooner did he close his eyes than Autumn came out of the bathroom.
“It’s all yours, Grady,” she said.
He looked up at her and felt a throb in his cock. She was fresh from the shower, her cheeks flushed pink from the hot water. Her hair was wet and wrapped in one of the towels he’d bought. Another towel was wrapped around her body, covering her breasts and coming down past her waist but it still left her neck and shoulders bare. It was high on her thighs, stopping just low enough to cover her butt.
“Sweet Lord,” he said without thinking.
“What?” she said.
He was glad he had the blanket for cover because his cock was as rigid as a pole. It stood up, erect in his lap, and he wanted nothing more than to walk right over to her, lift her up in his arms, and fling her down on the bed.
She was his deepest fantasy come to life.
Her skin looked soft and smooth.
He wanted to run his fingers over her thighs, to make her shiver with anticipation. He wanted to lie her down on the bed and take the towels away from her.
He longed to run his lips over her breasts, to taste her nipples in his mouth, to kiss her so passionately she moaned his name.
He yearned to spread her legs open and slide his tongue into her wet, trembling pussy. To make her cry out in surprise and pleasure. To climb up over her and slide his throbbing, rigid cock inside her delicate body.
He wanted her more than he’d ever wanted anything. It wasn’t just sexual desire, it was a longing deeper and more emotional than that. It was a yearning that came from his heart.
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