Lindsey closed her eyes. Four years, and she hadn’t been able to feel anything for another man even close to what she felt for Eric. Four years, and she still hadn’t made peace with the past. Wade was a good man and any woman would be happy to fall in love with him—with all the physical and emotional sensations that entailed—but she couldn’t. Wade wanted a wife, a family, a commitment, and he wanted Lindsey permanently in his bed. He’d hinted that he intended to ask her to marry him. Wade expected her to be ready with an answer, but Lindsey felt herself getting older, sadder, lonelier and more confused as the weeks and months went on.
It’s time to get over the past. I need to find out what went wrong with me and Eric—and to see if we can fix it. If we can’t…then it’s time to move on.
“I’m in,” she agreed. “Just let me touch base with my boss and family while you make the flight arrangements. Will someone be meeting me at the local airport?”
“It’s in Lee Vining, and yes, I will. Your connection will be in Fresno.”
“I can be ready sometime tomorrow afternoon.”
“Tonight would be better. There’s a red-eye leaving San Diego at nine forty-five.”
“Sorry, that’s impossible. I need tonight.”
She heard Jack slowly exhale. “Fine. Tomorrow morning, then. No later. I’ll call you back with the final arrangements, and you can pick up your prepaid ticket at Lindbergh Field. I’ll see you tomorrow. Good evening, Ms. Nelson.”
“Same to—” The line was already dead. “You.”
Lindsey replaced the receiver just as a knock sounded on her door. Wade must have given up waiting. Her stomach now churned from nervousness, not hunger, and she hurried to let him in. She quickly explained why she’d been held up on the phone.
“You have to stay home and pack? For Yosemite?” His normally patient voice rose. “Why you?”
“Because there’s no one else. Because it’s my job. Because I couldn’t refuse when the pushiest supervisor I’ve ever met forced me into it.”
“Forget it! I don’t want you going back to Yosemite and that guy who dumped you at the altar!” Wade protested.
“We never made it to the— Wait a minute! How do you know about Eric?”
“Your parents told me. Your sisters told me. Your friends told me. Said he broke your heart. That you’re overly cautious now. That I need to be patient. I have been, Lindsey, but this is too much!”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Say no!”
“I can’t, not when there’s a child involved. It’s like an E.R. doctor refusing to come in for work when there’s a major catastrophe. And even if I did say no, I suspect this Hunter could’ve pulled rank and ordered me out there. I didn’t have a choice. I mean, it’s not like I’m happy about it!”
Wade peered closely at her. “Maybe not,” he said. “But I don’t trust this guy.” He reached into his suit coat to withdraw a jeweler’s box. “I was going to give this to you at dinner tonight.” He held it out to her.
Lindsey refused to take it. “Oh, Wade… Tell me this isn’t what I think it is.”
He opened the box containing the solitaire diamond, since she wouldn’t do it herself. “Can I put this on your finger?”
“Please don’t. I can’t say yes to marriage, yet.”
“You aren’t saying no, either,” he insisted.
“Let’s wait. I’ll know for sure when I come home. I’ll only be gone three or four months.”
“Four months—with that bastard,” Wade said, his face grim. “Let’s hope that’s long enough to get him out of your system.”
Four years hasn’t been long enough. But she couldn’t say that to Wade, any more than she could take his ring or be his wife.
Not now. Maybe not ever…
Pushy supervisor or not, deep inside Lindsey knew she couldn’t have stayed away, even if a child hadn’t been involved. Time to face the past—and decide on the future.
JACK HUNTER DOODLED on the pad of paper before him. Still on hold with the travel agency as they tried to arrange a flight reservation, he found a humorless smile twitching at his lips. Lindsey Nelson had been a harder nut to crack than most of the ranger replacements he contacted. But then, the best of the best were never pushovers, Lindsey included.
He studied the files before him with their official photos and stats. Eric Kincaide: age thirty, never married, with a master’s degree in parks and wildlife management from U.C. San Francisco. Six foot two, blue eyes, black curly hair and a lean muscled body that could traverse any winter terrain…. A powerful skier and hiker who had traveled and skied the world, skiing that included obtaining two gold medals for his country’s Olympic cross-country skiing and shooting team. Yet he always returned to his native home in Santa Clara county, near Yosemite. He was an excellent lead ranger, and no one blamed him for Eva’s death, not even privately. Anyone who died on Eric Kincaide’s team had screwed up big time. Period.
Eva Jenkins…young, pretty and dead. She hadn’t had the brilliant career of Eric or Lindsey, but was a solid worker and canine handler who’d somehow made a fatal mistake.
Naomi Kincaide accepted Eric as leader, despite their being the same age—and twins. She hadn’t started out as a ranger, the way her brother had. Earlier she’d worked in a hospital in San Francisco as an EMT, where she’d eventually met and married her husband, Bruce Palmer; she’d kept her own last name. When he died, she’d joined the ranger service and now worked as Eric’s EMT team member.
Enter Lindsey Nelson, tough as nails. Twenty-five, never married. An associate’s degree in athletics and sports, and school letters in softball, gymnastics, golf and tennis, she competed harder against herself than anyone else. Despite her long blond hair, green eyes and a trim package of feminine curves and lithe strength, one noticed her looks second, her self-assuredness first. Lindsey Nelson came from a family of women who thrived on challenge. She could climb mountains and sheer cliffs, including El Capitan, at three thousand feet the tallest unbroken cliff in the world. She’d also climbed to the top of Yosemite Falls, its twenty-four hundred feet making it the highest free-falling waterfall in the United States.
She had a talent with animals that other handlers envied. Obviously it ran in the family. Yet she’d given up dogs and climbing and winter sports for an equally flawless career as a rescue ranger at California’s underwater state diving park, La Jolla Cove in San Diego county, with fill-in stints as a lifeguard at Carlsbad State Park. Lindsey Nelson was multitalented and successful in all her endeavors—except when it came to her personal relationships with men.
Jack studied the photos of the two rangers. To his discerning eye, the two stubborn chins promised resistance to anyone or anything challenging them. Their faces showed intelligence, determination and more than a hint of steel. Admirable qualities on the job, but from a personality standpoint, Jack figured that as a couple these two were doomed from the start. Their impressive careers and daring rescues proved that neither of them accepted compromise. He doubted either knew the definition of the word.
That might work well for rescues, but not for romance. However, Jack Hunter didn’t care about old flames or bruised hearts when it came to a kidnapped child. He only cared that he’d filled the opening Eva had left—filled it with the best ranger available. Personal relationships weren’t Jack’s concern. He’d done what he was hired to do. As for anything else—including love and romance—the woman he’d chosen as Eva Jenkins’s replacement was on her own.
CHAPTER TWO
THE PLANE TOOK ITS REGULAR flight path north, high above and along the California coast. The green of the ocean contrasted with the beige of the shoreline and the dark greens and tans of the mountain deserts. So far, Lindsey had seen little snow, but she hadn’t been airborne long. She turned away from the window, pleased the two seats next to her were empty. She wasn’t in the mood for chitchat. Her farewell phone conversations with her parents and two sisters had been full of their
warnings—to be careful in the cold of Yosemite, careful around Eric, and to be especially careful not to upset Wade.
It hadn’t been easy to say goodbye to Wade. He’d insisted on driving Lindsey to the airport, and had been as gracious, as loving as ever, but she knew he’d been hurt by her refusal to wear his ring. He’d become even more distraught when he learned how isolated she’d be at the ranger winter cabin.
“Can you at least give me your phone number?” he asked.
“I wish I could. There aren’t any phones. No cell phone service, either. No e-mail or snail mail. It’s strictly ham radio, Wade. The best you can do is phone any emergency news to Mr. Hunter, and he can radio it to me.”
Her boarding call was announced. “I guess this is it.” She’d reached for him to kiss him goodbye. When they parted, Wade took her hand and pushed the diamond ring onto her finger.
“If you won’t wear it as an engagement ring, consider it protection from the ex. If nothing else, he’ll keep his distance.”
Before Lindsey could protest, Wade had pulled her close for one more kiss, and whispered in her ear, “I’ll be waiting for you when you get back.” Then he’d abruptly left. Lindsey stood alone with a ring on her finger, no Wade to return it to, and a loudspeaker blaring out the final boarding call for her flight. She could do nothing, but get on the plane.
Open seating was blessedly plentiful. Lindsey found herself a spot, put a pillow and blanket on the aisle seat to discourage the more sociable, and found herself reviewing recent events. The last-minute frenzy of filling out checks for her rent and utility bills in advance and addressing them for her older sister, Kate, to mail in the next few months had kept her mind off Eric and their history. Her younger sister, Lara, had promised to look after her apartment and water her plants. Her parents promised to look after Wade; a request she hadn’t made, but something they’d offered nonetheless.
Then came the check-in line and being searched by airport security, getting a decent meal inside the airport ahead of time in case the airline food was tasteless or skimpy—it later proved to be both—and takeoff. Lindsey politely answered the usual round of questions from the flight attendants in the negative. “Do you want a soft drink? A snack? Care to purchase a headset or cocktail?”
Eyes closed, Lindsey tried to set her thoughts in order.
Eva dead because of carelessness. That poor woman. And now I’m taking her room, her gear, her winter uniforms, her bed, even her dog. I doubt I’ll get much of a welcome from the dog—or Eric. Not to mention the other two rangers. I don’t blame them, though.
Eric must be devastated about this ranger’s death, she found herself thinking. As team leader, he’d always emphasized safety….
Eric, her ex-lover with the laughing blue eyes, the dark hair and the capability to surmount any and all obstacles—or so she’d thought. She’d only seen him devastated once before. The day their happiness ended.
Yosemite
Summer, four years earlier
LINDSEY NELSON sat dejectedly in her bedroom at her summer cabin. The wedding dress she was supposed to be wearing tomorrow hung unwrapped, untouched, in her closet. Her suitcases were packed for her honeymoon vacation, boating and hiking at Lake Tahoe, along with some easy climbing. The dress, the suitcases, the snorkeling equipment in their travel bag for the honeymoon—it was all waiting and ready. For nothing, it turned out.
She stared at the floor, unwilling to meet the gaze of the white-faced man standing before her. Just this time last week she’d thought her life perfect. Lindsey Nelson, year-round search-and-rescue ranger for Yosemite, had it all: a job she loved, a man she adored and her wedding day tomorrow.
But her last rescue had ruined that; one loss had triggered it all. Lindsey and Missy, her beloved golden retriever, had searched and found a missing five-year-old boy. Missy might have been getting on in years, but her nose and her determination to succeed was as strong as ever. Yesterday, after sunset, when the other searchers had given up for the day, Missy and Lindsey continued their search alone—and were rewarded for their efforts.
The boy had been found alive, but Missy’s great courage was no match for her advancing years. For the first time ever in their partnership, Lindsey knew Missy’s rescue days were over.
“It’s time to retire, girl,” Lindsey had said after rushing her to the vet. “Eric, I don’t know about going to Lake Tahoe for the honeymoon. The vet said Missy’s still very fragile. Maybe we could go to the coast, instead. She’d get more oxygen at the beach than at the higher altitude of Tahoe.”
“It’s too late to change our plans now,” Eric had replied. His large, capable hand stroked the dog’s head. “Maybe we should just board her at the vet’s and reevaluate her health after the wedding.”
A warning rang in Lindsey’s head. Reevaluate from Eric’s lips meant We’ll see, as in No way.
“I’m not going anywhere, and Missy isn’t going anywhere without me while she’s not feeling herself. I’m not leaving her side.”
“Even to get married?”
“We’ll still get married the day after tomorrow, just as we planned,” Lindsey said reasonably. “After that, the vet and I will…reevaluate the honeymoon plans.” Her choice of his favorite word to stall was deliberate.
Eric drew in a deep breath and changed tack. “Sweetheart, I know you love the mutt. She’s—”
“Her name is Missy!”
“She’s done great work over the years. You both have. But marriage means we should put each other first.”
“Then you should respect my wishes. I don’t want to leave Missy alone when she’s sick.”
Eric had been disappointed, but agreed to postpone their honeymoon for the time being. “I can wait for the honeymoon, as long as the wedding is still on,” Eric said. He closed the door to her room with the easy maturity that would soon earn the twenty-six-year-old rescuer his promotion to head ranger.
Twenty-one-year-old Lindsey had sighed with relief and considered herself lucky to have such a great guy in her life. But right now her dog needed her. She fixed Missy a special dinner with the vet’s new pills mashed and mixed in. Then they curled up in bed for the night, the woodstove blazing with heat for the invalid. Missy burrowed her nose against Lindsey, while Lindsey encircled the shaggy neck with her arm, her hand resting on Missy’s golden head.
Late that night, before the sun rose on her wedding eve, Missy’s brave heart quietly, painlessly stopped. Even in death, the nose that had saved so many lives remained snuggled under Lindsey’s loving hand.
Lindsey’s fellow rangers gave Missy an official funeral in the beauty of Yosemite that dog and handler had served so faithfully, and loved so well. Her family, in town for the wedding, attended. Pet and kennel owners themselves, they understood Lindsey’s pain. Eric had seemed understanding himself, until later when they all gathered at a local hotel for what was to have been the prewedding dinner.
“Are we all set for the ceremony tomorrow?” he asked.
Lindsey shook her head, tears starting again. “I can’t, Eric.”
He grew very still, as did the whole roomful of family and friends, including other rangers. “I think we should postpone the wedding,” she whispered.
“You mean…cancel.” His voice hadn’t sounded like her lover’s at all.
“No, reschedule,” she insisted. “I just need a day or two and then everything can go on as planned. I’m so sorry, Eric…everyone. I just can’t…” Her voice broke. “I hope you understand.”
He had, at first. He’d been comforting, loving and compassionate—until that evening when Naomi, who had never approved of Lindsey for her beloved twin, had used her influence with Eric.
That influence was considerable.
Lindsey had overheard the end of one argument. “For God’s sake, Eric, Lindsey knows what our work schedules are like! Yours and mine and hers. She’s a park ranger! She also knows this park is booked two years in advance. Not to mention plane r
eservations and rental car reservations and the tight planning it required to get everyone flown in. This is going to throw everything into one big mess. Believe me, twin, Lindsey doesn’t want you to delay the wedding, she wants to cancel it. She’s scared. Her dog’s death is a perfect excuse to call it off. She’s been dragging her feet all the way to the altar.”
Eric had used those same arguments later that evening in private.
“But…you said you were okay about this,” a shocked Lindsey had said. “It’s only for a day or two.”
“I thought it over, and I’m not.”
“You mean your sister thought it over, and she’s not,” Lindsey had accused him. “You always take her side over mine! Dammit, Eric, I warned you about this. She’s never liked me. She’ll never like anyone who takes you away from her, and if she has to lie to keep you, she will!”
“You’re wrong.”
“I’m not! First thing she did after her husband died was come running back to you! Both your parents are alive, yet suddenly she has to be a park ranger herself.”
“She’s right about one thing. You have been dragging your feet about this wedding,” Eric accused.
“Damn right, but not because of you…because of this very thing! Naomi’s acting like our marriage is her business, and you two are a package deal. Well, I want to marry you, not your sister!”
“So now my family isn’t good enough for you?”
“I am not trying to call off the wedding. Naomi’s the one trying to end our plans. Why can’t you see that? Marriage is supposed to be based on trust between two people—not three! Who do you believe more, her or me? Choose!”
Eric’s eyes narrowed. “Is this an ultimatum?”
“It’s the simple truth,” Lindsey stated. “Naomi sees me as competition for you, and she’s jealous as hell. She doesn’t know me, or care to know me. All I want to do is say goodbye to my dog and not bring that sadness to our wedding. Or to the honeymoon, either. We can still go, now that Missy’s…” She swallowed hard. “You should take my word, not Naomi’s. And if you think she’s an expert on me, then you’re a fool! I’m rescheduling our wedding for the day after tomorrow.”
The Replacement Page 2
