“I was never your submissive, Grayson,” I remind him. “I’m not starting now.”
“No?” he demands, unsnapping my jeans, and dragging the zipper down. “Are you sure about that? I seem to remember plenty of submissive moments.” He moves behind me and drags my pants down.
“Sex doesn’t count,” I pant out, trying to look over my shoulder, only to have him palm my backside and then give it a hard smack.
“Grayson!” I yelp. “We don’t do this like that.”
“Now we do,” he promises, shoving my pants down further and then lifting me and I don’t know how he manages it, but in about thirty seconds, I’m also naked from the waist down. He smacks my backside again, and heat rushes through me.
“Grayson,” I bite out this time. “I thought you didn’t spank me out of anger?”
“Tonight, I do.” He leans in close, near my ear again. “Did it hurt?”
“No,” I whisper. “Not hurt. You know you didn’t hurt me.”
“Then what’s the problem?” He spanks me again and I arch into the touch.
“The problem,” I hiss, “is you’re mad and I’m aroused right now and I shouldn’t be.”
“No,” he says, easing back to my side, and squeezing my cheek, his free hand on my belly, “you shouldn’t be. That defeats the purpose of a spanking when I’m this mad at you.” His hand slides between my legs, fingers sliding along the wet seam of my sex. “You will not come.”
“I’m pretty sure that I am, in fact, going to come if your fingers stay where they’re at right now and you spank me again.”
He cups my sex and spanks me again. I gasp, arching into the palm now back to squeezing my ass, and then into the one cupping my sex. “Grayson,” I whisper, though I have no idea what I’m asking for. “Can you please—”
His fingers slide inside me, his lips at my ear. “Please what, baby?” The words are soft, seductive, but that edge, his anger, is not gone. It’s sharp. It’s moody and present. It’s a wedge between us and I can’t take it.
“I’m just trying to protect you,” I whisper. “The way I should have before.”
His fingers slide out of me and he turns me to face him, those green, tormented eyes fixed on me. “Protect me by trusting me this time. Trust me that he’s dangerous. Trust me to protect you and us.”
“I do,” I whisper. “I just—”
“Don’t finish that sentence, baby. Not right now.” He cups my face. “Just be here.”
My hands go to his hands. “I am. I’ve never been anywhere but here.”
His mouth crashes down on mine and the taste of him explodes on my tongue: torment, fear, pain, loss, hunger, need. He needs so much and he has hurt so much and I can’t do anything to add to those feelings. I just don’t know how to do that but I’ll decide with him. That’s the only way this works. He scoops me up and starts walking. I’m naked in his arms while he is fully dressed and I have this sense of being willingly vulnerable with this man. I would do anything with him and anything for him.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Mia
Grayson settles me on one of the soft navy-blue couches, the cushion absorbing my weight, while Grayson’s big body frames mine, even as he pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it. “You,” he says, “will listen to me.” He doesn’t give me time to reply, by obvious intent. He kisses me, licking me into that submission we both know he can get from me if he so pleases because Grayson’s subtle demand for power is not so subtle when we’re naked.
One of his hand slides under my backside, while the other covers my breast. He’s not even undressed yet and I’m wet, wanting, and in need of him, but I know him. I know I will not be easily sated. I know the darker side of Grayson that no one else does, and in his present mood, he’ll deny me until I’m downright desperate. “Don’t move,” he orders when his mouth parts from mine, but he moves. He lifts his body off of mine and then suddenly I’m on my stomach. He’s turned me over and before I can even gasp, I’m not just on my stomach, he’s dragging me to my elbows and knees. “Down,” he says, his hand on my back and I get it and him. He needs control right now. He feels like I’m taking it. I have taken it.
I sink as low as this position allows me.
He’s on his knees beside me, his hand caressing a slow path up and down my spine. “God, I missed you, Mia,” he says, but there’s a vibration in his tone I do not like.
“Why do you say that like it pisses you off?”
“Wanting you isn’t what pisses me off and you know it.” He stands up and I can hear him begin to undress, while he’s left me here submissive, vulnerable, and willing. Because I do know why he’s angry. He’s angry that I left. He’s mad that I misjudged him and while he’d denied those feelings back in the Hamptons, he’s not denying them now. He needs my submission now and I’ll give it to him, but I always did. He has always been the one person that I would dare to do anything with. He’s always been that man for me, the only man for me.
I trust him.
I trust him completely.
My God, how did I let myself forget that? But I know in this moment exactly how. I know the flaw, my flaw, maybe our flaw. He sits down behind me on the couch, but I don’t wait for what comes next. I need to talk to him, I need to touch him. I sit up and twist around to straddle him and all his hard, naked perfection, his erection thick at my bottom. “I know what you wanted and needed right now, but I need to say something to you. I trust you,” I say, my hands on his shoulders but he doesn’t touch me.
“Are you sure about that, Mia? Because you’re on my lap right now. You don’t seem to even trust me like this, naked.”
“No, that’s what I’m telling you. When I was laying there I thought: I trust him. How did this happen? How did we get here? And then it hit me. I trust you completely. I trusted you completely and the idea that I could trust that much, and find that woman pressed against you, I just—that was such a deep wound. Don’t you see?”
“No, Mia, I don’t. Because what happened didn’t feel like trust.”
My lashes lower with his anger and I force aside a moment when I want to shut down, which was exactly where I went wrong with our breakup and exactly why I admit, “I shut down. It was the only way to protect myself. That was the flaw that was really perfection. I trusted you so completely that I didn’t know how to survive the wound.”
“You didn’t fully trust me or you wouldn’t have needed to shut down.”
“I did. I swear to you, Grayson. I did.”
“I don’t know what to do with that, Mia. You want a reason to distrust me?”
“I loved you to the point that your betrayal felt like it would end me. I can’t be with you if you’re going to resent me. I can’t be with you if you don’t think I deserve everything again. You just—I just need you to know that maybe I loved too much.” I try to move away but he catches me, his hand on my hip and the back of my head.
“Maybe you didn’t love me enough,” he says. “Maybe you didn’t love me like I did you because I couldn’t have left you.”
“Loved?”
“You know I still love you.”
“Maybe not enough.” I try to move again and suddenly my stomach is not feeling well but Grayson holds me. “Let go. I feel sick. I need up.”
“Stop, baby. Stop pulling away.” He rests his forehead against mine. “I love you more than I love life itself. I’d say you know that, but obviously, you don’t. Obviously, you didn’t.”
“I did. It was my own insecurity that got us here. I told you that back in the Hamptons.”
“How do we fix that? Did I do something to create it? Because if anyone knows I’m not perfect, it’s you. I let you see everything. You made me be real, remember?”
“Real is good and I don’t want you to stop being real even if that means being angry, but forgive me, okay? Because we can’t do this if you can’t.”
“I’m angry at us
both for letting it happen,” he says, “not just you.”
“Well then, yell at me, fuck me, do whatever it takes, but stop being angry.”
“No yelling,” he says, dragging my mouth to his. “Lots of fucking.”
Our mouths collide and our tongues stroke long and deep, a frenzied rush of kissing, touching, and him lifting me to press the soft tip of his thick erection inside me. I gasp as he pulls me down and drives into me. We stay there, connected in the most intimate of ways, breathing together, wanting together, savoring each other until a crackle of electricity seems to snap between us and we’re kissing again, our bodies swaying, grinding, swaying some more.
At some point, we move from that seductive emotional bond to one that borders on pure physicality. I lean back into his thrusts while his gaze rakes over my breasts, a hungry look on his handsome face. His fingers clamp down on my nipples, and with each push and pull of my body, sensations ripple along my nerve endings, tightening my sex, and I just need to be closer to him. I lean in again and our kisses become desperate. His hand squeezes my backside and then he gives me a hard smack that has me gasping and arching into his thrust.
“Oh, God,” I breathe out because the man rocks my entire world in every way.
He reacts by rolling me to my back, and thrusts and pumps, his hand under my backside, lifting me into a deeper, harder, spot that has me shattering with no warning. I am just there, right there, in that perfect place, and my sex clenches around him. Grayson buries his face in my neck and he groans, this deep, sexy, groan and shudders into release.
For just a moment, he all but flattens on top of me, but then he rolls us to our sides, facing each other, fingers tenderly stroking my brow. “Don’t leave again,” he says. “You stay. We fight. We fuck.”
“Yes,” I whisper. “I stay. We fight. We fuck.”
“Good. Then we need to talk, and we might need to fuck again when it’s over.”
“About Ri?”
“Yes, baby, about Ri.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Mia
Grayson shifts us and we both sit up on the couch, and then he’s standing, taking me with him. I yelp as he scoops me up again, but I don’t know why I’m surprised. The man is always carrying me around, but then we’ve been apart for a year. What is familiar is being reintroduced and in every way, it still feels perfect. He loves to carry me around and I love when he does. A short walk later, I’m on the counter in our stunning bathroom with white tile trimmed by wood that matches the floors. Grayson walks to the bathroom door, reaches behind it and grabs a pair of pajama bottoms he pulls on, which reminds me of my robe that had once hung in the same spot.
“Remember this?” he asks, pulling that very robe from the hook.
“You never moved it?” I ask, surprised by just how much he’d kept his home my home.
He crosses to wrap the white silk around me. “It’s been waiting on you, just like me,” he says as I slip my arms into it.
“You tried to fuck me out of your system, though,” I say, feeling the bite of that confession.
He strokes my cheek, cupping it to force my gaze to his. “Mia—”
“It’s okay,” I say, covering his hand. “I left. I left for a year. You’re human. You needed what I wasn’t here to give you.”
“I needed you.” His hands settle on my waist. “I can’t change how I handled you leaving any more than you can change leaving. You were right in the living room. We need to move on. We need to look forward. I want you back here. I want you next to my side. I want you out of Ri’s company.”
“Me, too, on all counts. I have a case, though, a woman that I really want to help. I can’t dump the case. She killed her abusive husband, but the trial date isn’t for four months.”
“You aren’t staying there for four months.” His hands move to my knees.
“I know,” I say quickly. “I’m not suggesting that I do. I just hate deserting her. I’m passionate about her case. She was defending herself from a brutal attack and she shouldn’t have been charged. It’s wrong that she’s going through this. She trusts me and if she follows me to Bennett, Ri could sue me and you.”
“Ri won’t be suing anyone when I’m done with him,” he bites out, his voice low, tight. “Let’s talk about what went wrong in that meeting tonight.”
“You didn’t like Blake or his team?”
“Not one of them brought up the possibility that Ri could have been having you followed and knows you’ve been with me this weekend.”
“I’m sure that’s assumed with all of the efforts to hide my present location.”
“I don’t like unspoken assumptions that impact your safety,” he says.
“You really believe Ri is dangerous?”
“Yes. I do. If Blake’s team shows up here in the morning and doesn’t make me feel really damn good about you going to that meeting with Ri tomorrow, you’re not going.”
My hands cover his. “I know you’re worried about me.”
“Mia, do not fight me on this.”
“I know you lost your father and I left, but I’m not leaving again. I won’t be stupid. If I get a bad feeling, and you know I have good gut feelings, I’ll just leave.”
“If you can,” he says. “That building is locked down by Ri’s people, who were good enough to hide from a world class hacker like Blake Walker.”
Nerves knot my belly. I’m starting to get nervous, but I have to do what I can to protect Grayson. “Okay. So what makes us feel good about me going in there tomorrow?”
“Nothing.”
“Grayson,” I plead. “I can buy you time. I can keep his guard down just by making him think nothing has changed. I don’t have to play detective.”
“We’ll both know in the morning when Blake’s team shows up. Fair enough?”
“As long as you haven’t made up your mind already,” I agree.
“I do need to buy time, a few days to let our people work,” he concedes. “And I do believe you suddenly quitting would put him on edge. He’d look for trouble, but it’s not worth it if it puts you in danger. Agreed?”
“You going to jail for something you didn’t do is not okay. I’m willing to take risks for you.”
“You are, just by walking back into that building and that’s more than I want you to do.”
“But you will,” I press.
His jaw sets hard. “If I feel good about it in the morning.” He lifts me off the counter and sets me in front of him. “How about some dinner?”
“Chinese?”
“Yes,” he says. “Chinese.”
“You do know I still haven’t become domestic, right?” I tease. “We’re going to live a life of takeout in between the meals Leslie makes us.”
“I can live with a life of takeout,” he assures me, his green eyes lighting with laughter that I’m pleased to see return. He kisses my temple. “Now if I can just find my phone.” He turns me toward the door and smacks my backside. I yelp, but I’m smiling as I head to the bedroom, right up until the moment I reach the doorway. I stop there dead in my tracks and I stare at the room that was mine with Grayson, that is mine with Grayson again.
We decorated it together as well, picked out the navy headboard on the massive bed with chairs that match by the window. We love blue. We love this room. Grayson steps behind me, and his hands settle on my shoulders. “This is where you belong.”
I rotate to face him. “With you is where I belong. I never felt at home at that apartment, but I tried. I thought I had to make it without you, so I tried.”
“Like I tried, Mia, but in a different way. I needed our place to be a sanctuary when you returned, our home, and I promise you, I’ll protect that always.” His hand slides under my hair to my neck. “You fill all the empty places in this home. You fill all the empty places in me, and you’re the only one who knows they exist. Because I trust you, Mia.”
“Do you?” I
challenge, “Because—”
“I thought you left me for Ri,” he says. “As I stand here thinking about what you said in the living room, I understand it. I trusted you completely. I pulled back when I thought you betrayed me because to trust that much and be betrayed cuts deeper than any blade, but I’m not pulling back now or ever again. Me and you, forever.” He leans in, kisses me and the touch of his lips, tender and yet possessive, sends a rush of heat and awareness through my body.
“You don’t just belong with me,” he says. “You belong to me, and Ri is going to know that before this is over.” There is something in his voice, a lethal quality that gives me pause.
Despite my push for him to go on the attack, this is the first time I’ve been concerned that the remedy he plans could be worse than the crimes he’s been wrongly accused of. I pull back to look at him. “What are you going to do, Grayson?”
“Whatever it takes to end Ri.”
“End Ri?” I ask, because that tone again, that look in his eyes, worries me. “What does that mean?”
He lowers his mouth to mine and says, “It means he won’t be at our wedding, baby.” He seals that declaration with a kiss that is meant to silence my questions and it works. “And yes, I’m going to ask again. Once I know that I’m not dragging you to hell with me.”
“I’ll go anywhere with you,” I promise.
“But I won’t let you.” He strokes my cheek. “Because that’s love, Mia. I take care of you before me.” He kisses me. “I’ll order the food.” He heads toward the bedroom door and I think about those words. He takes care of me over himself. I need to take care of him over myself, but the problem is, with Grayson there is loss and pain to consider. I can’t make a stupid decision that leaves me dead and him destroyed. I can’t sacrifice myself without taking him with me. And yet, I have to go meet with Ri tomorrow after Grayson has all but declared him a killer.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Grayson
Dirty Rich Betrayal Page 14
