Wings of the Morning

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Wings of the Morning Page 11

by Beryl Matthews


  ‘Thanks.’ Paul smiled and relaxed. ‘That makes me feel a whole lot better. Have you got anyone special?’

  ‘No.’ Reid grinned, relieved his brother had dropped the subject of Annie. ‘So that lets you off, you won’t have to go looking after a girl for me.’

  ‘Damn!’ Paul remarked in mock dismay.

  The brothers started to reminisce, laughing at the fun they’d had while growing up. They’d always been close and the three years between them had never made any difference to their friendship. Paul had always followed Reid’s girlfriends around with wide-eyed admiration for his brother’s pulling power.

  ‘Seriously, though, Reid,’ Paul said after a couple of minutes, ‘you ought to have a special girl. You’re not getting any younger,’ he mocked, and then his look became dreamy. ‘You find yourself someone like Annie. In fact, if I don’t make it you can marry her yourself. I’d like that.’

  Reid tipped his head back and laughed at the ridiculous notion. ‘I don’t think that will be necessary. I’ll be very happy with her as a sister-in-law.’

  ‘Yes.’ Paul brightened up, his earlier gloom disappearing. ‘We’ll get married as soon as possible. In fact I think I’ll ask her next time I see her, and you can be best man.’

  ‘That’s a date.’ Reid stood up, pleased to see his brother back to his normal self. ‘Let’s go and get a pint. They’ve only blown the roof off the pub.’

  *

  When Paul had left and the rest of the pilots were flaked out, Reid and Bouncer, now somewhat cleaner, gave the new boys a lecture on how to attack and, hopefully, stay alive.

  After snatching a few hours’ sleep they went to the airfield just as dawn was breaking. Reid was determined that these young men were going to survive. Too many of them were dying within the first two weeks of combat, and that was terrible.

  ‘Try to remember everything we told you last night,’ he said. ‘Once we’re airborne we’ll take you through a mock battle sequence.’

  Barrett and Johnson nodded eagerly.

  ‘And just one more piece of advice. Fly and fight like Bouncer, but whatever you do, don’t land like him.’

  They looked puzzled.

  ‘He isn’t called Bouncer for nothing,’ Reid added drily. ‘If you get into any trouble, for heaven’s sake bale out.’

  Bouncer shuddered and Reid despaired of his friend. He was a fearless pilot and fought like a tiger, but the thought of jumping out of an aeroplane sent him into a panic. Reid knew he wouldn’t hesitate, especially if the damned thing was on fire.

  ‘Sir?’ Barrett, the younger, asked, ‘we’ve heard that the Germans shoot at pilots on parachutes.’

  ‘Some do, the bastards,’ Bouncer growled. ‘They know that if we land safely we will live to fight another day.’

  ‘Nevertheless, you are a valuable asset,’ Reid pointed out firmly, ‘and we need you alive. The planes can be replaced, but experienced pilots are a necessity, and the only way you can become experienced is to stay alive.’

  *

  And they did. Reid watched over them for the next few days, and saw them quickly change from nervous boys into confident, efficient pilots. And whenever they received more new recruits he and Bouncer tried to find the time to give them some training before they actually had to face the enemy. It wasn’t always possible and there were always some who didn’t survive for long. Reid found that hard to take but he continued to nurture and instruct his pilots whenever he had the chance.

  10

  September 1940

  ‘Have you heard the awful news?’ Jean sat opposite Annie in the mess and wiped tears from her eyes.

  ‘I’ve only just come off duty.’ She reached out and took hold of her friend’s hand in concern. ‘What’s happened?’

  ‘The Germans have sunk a ship carrying children.’ She looked up, her face stricken. ‘How could they do a thing like that?’

  Annie’s heart lurched. Thank goodness Bill had vetoed the idea of James joining that scheme to evacuate children to Canada and elsewhere. His son had been keen to go but Bill and Rose wouldn’t hear of it.

  Jean blew her nose. ‘The thought of all those terrified little ones in the sea is too dreadful for words. There’s been an awful loss of life.’

  ‘When did this happen?’ Annie was surprised she hadn’t heard about it earlier, but then she’d hardly left her post over the last few days.

  ‘Two days ago, the 17th of September.’ Jean grimaced and wiped away another tear. ‘The City of Benares, I think it was called, and they sailed on Friday the thirteenth. How’s that for a bad omen? This isn’t a war of armies, is it?’ Jean remarked with sadness. ‘Innocent civilians are in the thick of it now. Look at poor old London, being bombed night after night.’

  ‘Yes, it’s terrible, and I’m relieved that my family are in Wales with George for a while, all except Rose, and she refuses to leave. She’s working with the Women’s Voluntary Service in London, and it’s damned dangerous. I’m worried sick about her but she insists on doing something now the children are safe.’ Annie gave a little dry laugh. ‘Bill will be furious when he comes home and discovers what she’s been doing. If anyone can send her packing to Wales, then it’s him.’

  ‘Annie?’

  She looked up at the tall figure standing beside their table and leapt to her feet, nearly knocking over the chair in her haste. ‘Jack!’ It was four months since he’d walked away from her, but she was so pleased to see him. Her smile faded as she took in his appearance. He had deep lines across his forehead and around his mouth, and dark smudges under his eyes, which looked sunken in and haunted. There was also a lot more grey hair than she remembered. He had aged almost beyond recognition.

  ‘Dear God!’ she breathed. ‘What have you been up to?’

  ‘I need to see you, Annie. Have you got some spare time?’ he asked, touching her arm.

  ‘Yes, I’m off duty until six in the morning.’ She’d planned to go to the pub with Jean, so she gave her friend an apologetic look, and nodded in relief when Jean indicated that she could forget their outing.

  They walked out of the mess in silence, and Annie could hear Jack drawing in deep breaths of the early evening air, as if trying to revive himself. He was clasping her hand tightly; she knew that something traumatic must have happened to him but she didn’t speak, sensing that he needed time to gather his thoughts together.

  He stopped just outside the camp and leaned against a tree, pulling her into his arms and burying his face in her hair. ‘I hope you don’t mind me coming to you, Annie? I didn’t know where else to go.’

  ‘What is it, Jack?’ she asked.

  ‘You’ve heard about the ship with the children on it?’ he rasped as if in pain. ‘My two boys were on it.’

  ‘Oh, Jack!’ She hugged him in sympathy. No wonder he looked devastated. ‘I’m so sorry. Do you know if they’re safe?’

  ‘Both missing.’ He swore in anger. ‘I was against this scheme, but my wife went ahead and made all the arrangements while I was away.’

  ‘You mean you didn’t know they were going?’ she asked in disbelief. How could a father not know that his children were being sent abroad? What kind of a woman would keep that from her husband?

  He nodded grimly. ‘Alice knew I’d stop her if I found out. When she brought up the subject a while ago, I opposed it, but she didn’t listen …’ His voice broke.

  ‘She shouldn’t have done that, Jack, but she must be grief-stricken now.’ Annie looked at him with tears in her eyes. ‘You should be with her, not here pouring out your sorrow to me.’

  ‘I’ve been home for the last two days, and she’s all right; she’s with her family, and I needed to be with you.’ He kissed the top of her head. ‘Our marriage was rocky before this happened but we stayed together for the children, now there’s nothing to hold us together.’

  ‘Oh, please don’t feel like that,’ Annie pleaded, frightened by the tone of utter despair in his voice. ‘They migh
t still be found.’

  ‘Please God they are, but I don’t think I can ever forgive her. And I couldn’t stay any longer, I have to get back.’

  Annie frowned. What could be more urgent than Jack staying with his family at a time like this? ‘Back where?’

  ‘France.’

  The breath caught in her throat as she realized, for the first time, what he did. What an idiot not to have guessed it before. She’d known that his work must be secret but it had never entered her head that he might be doing something so dangerous. ‘You’re working behind enemy lines?’

  ‘Didn’t you guess that when I left so suddenly and said I wouldn’t be able to keep in touch?’ he asked.

  ‘No, fool that I am, I thought you didn’t want to see me any more.’

  ‘Quite the opposite,’ he said, summoning up a ghost of a smile. ‘That couple of weeks we spent walking, talking and laughing, was like heaven. I had just returned from a mission and your relaxing company was a godsend to me.’

  ‘Jack?’ Annie chewed her lip, deep in thought. ‘Are there many people doing what you do?’

  ‘A few, yes.’ His tone was guarded.

  ‘Men and women?’

  ‘No, Annie!’ He held her at arm’s length, his expression fierce. ‘I admit that was what I had in mind when I recruited you, but it’s out of the question.’

  ‘Why?’ she answered with determination. ‘My French is fluent.’

  ‘No.’ He gave her a gentle shake. ‘You’re too fragile and far too beautiful. Do you know what the Germans would do to you if they caught you?’

  ‘Shoot me?’ she asked.

  ‘Worse than that, and after they’d finished with you they might shoot you, if you were lucky.’

  Annie’s mouth set in a determined line. ‘I still think – ’

  ‘Forget it, Annie! I’ve told Sam that if he tries to persuade you to do this, I’ll come back and kill him myself.’

  ‘Sam?’ Annie studied his angry expression. ‘So that’s what he’s involved in.’

  ‘Of course, and he’s got his eye on you, so if he offers to teach you unarmed combat you tell him to go to hell.’

  So many puzzling things were now becoming clear, and her mind began to whirl when she thought about what Jack and others like him were doing.

  ‘Annie,’ he growled. ‘I don’t like the silence. I can practically hear your mind working. Don’t even consider it,’ he pleaded. ‘We need you here – I need you here.’

  She looked up sharply. ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘I have persuaded Sam to let you become my contact here. I transmit regularly and I need someone I can trust.’

  ‘I’d like to do that,’ she agreed eagerly.

  ‘Thank you.’ He breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Tomorrow you will be given my code name and call sign.’

  ‘Tomorrow? But when are you going back to France?’

  He glanced at his watch. ‘I’m leaving in six hours.’

  Annie almost reeled in shock. He couldn’t go at a time like this, and he didn’t look fit enough. This was madness! ‘But Jack, what about your children? Suppose they’re found and they need you?’

  ‘If there is any news you will be told and can transmit it to me, and if I need to come back they will send a plane for me, if they can.’

  ‘I understand.’ Her heart ached for this brave man who was still doing his job, even though he was burdened with a dreadful personal tragedy.

  ‘There’s one more thing I would ask of you,’ he said softly. ‘One of the officers is letting me use his room tonight and I need to get some sleep …’ – he paused – ‘would you …’ He tailed off.

  ‘What?’ Annie wasn’t sure what he wanted.

  ‘Stay with me tonight. I’m not going to make love to you, I’m too damned tired, but I can’t be alone tonight. If I could just hold you for one night I might be able to get some rest.’ He grimaced. ‘That sounds ridiculous, and if things were different I would want to love you very much, but a sexual relationship between us would be wrong for you.’

  ‘Because you’re married?’

  ‘Among other things, yes.’ He kissed her eyes gently. ‘I’m too old for you and my life is in a mess. You deserve better and I would never do anything to hurt you, Annie.’

  ‘Oh, Jack.’ The tears began to flow down her cheeks. ‘If you really wanted me – ’

  ‘Shush, don’t cry for me, Annie. I don’t want your love out of pity.’

  ‘It wouldn’t be for that,’ she protested, but deep down, she knew he was right. She was desperately sorry for this lovely man and she absolutely adored him. She had never felt so in tune with anyone in her life, and she longed to reach out to comfort and take some of his pain away. ‘I do care for you very much.’

  ‘I’m too damned tired to take advantage of your generosity, and I’m glad, because I can leave in a few hours knowing that I haven’t done something that will weigh heavily on my mind in the future. Do you understand?’

  ‘Yes,’ she whispered, ‘and I’ll stay with you tonight, Jack.’

  When they reached his room, he sat on the bed, kicked his shoes off and held his arms out to her. She also removed her shoes and he pulled her down, nestling her into his arms with a ragged sigh of utter exhaustion. And he was instantly asleep.

  Annie listened to his steady breathing for a while, and just before slipping into sleep herself thought, Dora would never believe this!

  A movement in the room snapped Annie awake and she sat up, disorientated for the moment, wondering why she wasn’t in her own bed.

  Jack was in civilian clothes and standing by the window, looking up at the night sky. He turned when he heard her move.

  ‘Are you leaving now?’ she whispered.

  He nodded. ‘The truck has just arrived to take me to the plane.’

  ‘Take care, Jack.’ She stood up and wrapped her arms around him. ‘I’ll be waiting for your messages, and any word about your children will be sent to you as soon as possible.’

  He smiled down at her. ‘Thank you for staying with me, Annie.’

  ‘Did it help?’

  ‘Oh, yes.’ He gave a crooked smile. ‘I must be getting old if I can sleep with a beautiful girl and not make love to her.’

  She chuckled. ‘You’re not old, you just needed some rest.’

  ‘And I do feel rested,’ he told her with a wry grin. ‘It’s a shame I’ve got to leave at this very minute.’

  ‘Do you jump out of the plane?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes, but that’s not my favourite part of the trip.’ He turned her face to the window so he could see her expression clearly. ‘And it is something you are never going to do, isn’t it?’

  ‘I promise,’ she told him, wondering why the thought of parachuting out of a plane was so exciting to her. ‘If you need me here, then this is where I’ll stay.’

  ‘That makes me feel easier. Now, Annie, I don’t want to ruin your reputation, so try not to be seen when you go back to your own hut.’

  She gave him an impish smile. ‘You haven’t done anything to ruin my reputation. I’m sure that sleeping on a bed, fully clothed, doesn’t count as a reputation-ruining pastime.’

  He groaned. ‘Don’t remind me. Nevertheless, I don’t want people believing that I’ve taken your virginity.’

  ‘How do you know I am still a virgin?’ she asked.

  ‘I just do; you are not worldly wise, and it shows. I believe you will only give yourself to a man you truly love.’

  ‘You’re making me sound deadly dull,’ she protested. She felt uncomfortable about the conversation. She knew that the danger and uncertainty of the war was making a lot of people’s moral code slip, but she had resolved not to let that happen to her. However, she had been willing to make an exception tonight, but that had been out of pity and compassion for this man she admired so much. All the wrong reasons, in fact, and he had been right to refuse her.

  ‘You are anything but dull, Annie, so you be
careful going back.’

  ‘Don’t worry. If I’m seen people will just think I’ve been working late. We are often called out in the night.’

  He hugged her again and whispered, ‘I must go. Goodbye, Annie.’ Then he turned abruptly and left the room.

  She waited for about ten minutes after he’d gone, pondering that goodbye. It had sounded as if he was saying that he would never see her again. Then with a sigh she made her way back to her own hut. No one saw her and the other girls were fast asleep so she slipped out of her clothes and crawled into bed, her heart troubled. She could only guess at the things Jack would have to face.

  Sam was waiting for her in the ops room at six o’clock that morning. Jack hadn’t left Annie until three o’clock and sleep had been impossible through worrying about him. Their meeting had been too brief but it had answered a lot of her questions. She now understood why he had left her so abruptly four months ago. He was such a brave man and if she could have gone in the plane with him then she would have done so.

  ‘Jack explained what you will be doing?’ he asked.

  ‘Yes, is there any news of the children?’

  ‘Not yet, I’m afraid.’ He sighed. ‘Terrible business!’

  Annie was desperately disappointed. ‘I was hoping to be able to give him some good news. What time will he transmit?’

  ‘Not until twelve hundred hours, but you’ll have plenty to do until then. You will still be monitoring other calls for us.’

  Annie settled herself down and picked up the headphones.

  Sam put his head on one side and studied her face. ‘Are you and Jack lovers?’

  ‘No. Not that it’s any of your business, Sam,’ she told him, annoyed at his blunt question.

  ‘That’s where you’re wrong. I like Jack, he’s a very good agent, and I wouldn’t like to see him get careless because of some slip of a girl.’

 

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