by Robin Banks
“Why would they want to, out of the blue like this?”
She pulls a face. “Because they are poor girls. Literally. You’ll see. But now I need to drive and fret. You can put some music on, if you want.”
“Yes please!”
“I pick.” Tom elbows me. “Way you’ve been going, we’d end up with some weird shit in an odd language.”
“It’s my music. It’s all weird shit and odd languages. You can like it or lump it,” mutters Alya.
The drive doesn’t take long, but it’s still strange to be going through so much empty space. I’m enjoying myself, right up to when we finally reach our first destination. Then I really wish I’d stayed home. The bubble is much smaller than the one I grew up in, but massive if it’s really the home of a single family. The building inside it is unlike anything I’ve ever seen. It’s white, massive, and beautiful, with all sorts of curly bits and sticky-outy things sprinkled all over it. I can’t work out what they could possibly be for, so I’m guessing they’re just to show that whoever owns the place can afford to waste credit on them. Not even our Fed buildings are as big or as grand. Just looking at it makes me feel small, badly dressed, and dirty.
The guard at the bubble gate confirms my fears. He’s better dressed than me. He’s better dressed than I’ve ever been. Alya doesn’t look the least bit bothered, though, and we get let in almost immediately.
We’re barely inside the gate when a man waves us down. He’s not dressed as fancy as the guard, but I can tell he’s important by the way he carries himself. Alya makes a strange face when she sees him. I can’t tell if she’s happy or scared. She stops the ATR immediately and gets us all out.
“Raj. I didn’t expect you here.”
The guy smiles weakly. “I win this round, then. I expected you. I picked up your com yesterday, and we saw you land today. You made good time.”
“We try. We don’t often succeed.” They’re staring at each other as if neither of them had any idea what’s going on, until the guy blinks and puts out his hand to her. “Welcome to Anteia. I’ve missed you.”
Alya puts her fingers in his hand and he squeezes them. Neither of them seem inclined to let go.
She exhales deeply. “I’ve missed you too.”
He smiles properly then, and suddenly things don’t feel so awkward.
“These are Luke and Tom.” Anya nods in our direction. “Kolya’s grooms. They are new. They’re here as bodyguards.”
“And chaperones, I bet.”
Alya reddens. “Don’t be silly.”
“I know how much they love to gossip on show. But yes, bodyguards are a good idea. This place is getting better all the time, but it can still surprise you. I thought I’d come with you, if you’ll allow me. You’ll get in quicker and get treated better.”
“Oh. I didn’t expect you to. Won’t your father mind?”
“He knows better than to try and keep me away.”
Alya blushes and looks away. Damn. So this is what this is all about?
Raj seems to finally realize that he’s still holding on to Alya’s hand and lets go. “Shall we go in mine? It’ll be faster getting in.”
“And you’re scared of my driving.”
“True,” he smiles. “But we really will get in faster. They know my ATR code. In the olden days there’d be musicians and garlands waiting for us.”
“And now?”
“And now they know that we’re actually people. But they still process us faster than they’d process you.”
“Ok, then. But only because I don’t want you throwing up in my ATR.”
Raj smiles through a sigh. “Yes. I have missed you. Come! The ATR is ready. Do you want a drink before we go? Some refreshments?”
“No time, I’m afraid. Not today.”
“Ha. I will willfully misinterpret that to mean that you promise to come back and to stay for refreshments.”
“You haven’t changed a bit. Sneaky and underhanded.”
“Dealing with you, I need all the edge I can get.”
The ATR is so fancy that I don’t want to get in. I must be halving its value just by standing near it. Raj seems to notice my discomfort.
“Come in! Get comfy. This is what the damn machine is for.”
Alya drapes herself in one of the front seats. “I thought it was for intimidating the commoners.”
“We’ve got the one with the spiked wheels for that. You are a horrible woman. Gods, I’ve missed you.”
They keep looking at each other and getting stuck in each other’s eyes until they shake themselves off. It’s kinda sweet, but mostly it’s goofy as hell. I hope it never happens to me.
Tom and I sit down, Tom right next to Raj. As soon as the ATR is out of the gate, Raj smiles at him. “So, first time on Anteia? How do you like it?”
“We’ve not seen much, really. You seem to have a lot of space.”
“Where are you from?”
“Celaeno. One of the housing bubbles. We didn’t get around much.”
“Neither did I, when I was your age.” Raj smiles. “I definitely wasn’t touring the planets with a circus. I think it’s splendid. You’re lucky.”
Alya snickers. “That’s because you’ve only seen us here, and only on good days.”
“It’s always a good day when you’re here. But Uncle Kolya told me plenty of stories, so I know how it can be. How is he doing?”
“Same. Working too much, not playing enough, getting crankier by the day. I don’t know when he last had a day off. If you don’t come to see him, he will be immensely cross.”
“Of course I’ll come! The whole family will come. Did you hear? Sendhil had another baby.”
“How many is that now?”
“Sen’s five, and two of Mahesh. They’re great. You must come and see them. They’ve been asking after you. And dad, and Lara.”
He picks up her hand and squeezes it. She doesn’t pull it back. I’m glad there’s nothing to hit out here, because I’m really not sure that Raj is paying any attention to his driving.
It doesn’t take long for us to get to where we’re going. It’s sure different from the places we’ve seen earlier. This bubble is crammed with buildings and people. The buildings reach up into the sky, nearly touching the dome. The streets are narrow and crawling with a moving mass of people. It’s so loud in there that we can hear it from the outside.
Even Tom’s surprised. “Holy shit. How tight do you pack them in?”
Raj looks embarrassed. “Yes. It’s a problem. We’re working on it, though not fast enough. But this is normal here.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. It’s just different from back home.”
“You should feel lucky. We make this work, just, but it’s hard. Still, it took a long time to get this bad, so it’s taking a long time to fix it. But we’re getting there. The Patrol is helping, kind of.” He turns to Alya. “Did you know a Gwen McGee when you were there? Academy lecturer. She quit a couple of years ago under rather shady circumstances. Her work has just gone public, unofficially. Lara’s managed to get her hands on some of it. Now she wants the lot.”
“Nope. The only McGee I knew was a guy. But I was there in ’68.”
“Interesting times.”
“I missed most of that. Thankfully. What was this McGee doing?”
“Research on facilitating cultural changes.”
“The Patrol was doing that? Are you kidding?”
“Yeah. Didn’t last long, unsurprisingly. Lara will tell you all about it. She’ll tell you whether you like it or not; she’s been meaning to for ages. You’re one of her favorite people to talk complicated stuff with, and you’re not terribly good on the com, you know.”
“I don’t like to abuse your kindness.”
“We want to talk to you. How’s you talking to us abusing our kindness?”
“Using up your signal.”
“We have that signal so we can talk to people. You’re one of the people we like to talk t
o.”
This feels like an argument they’ve had before and, although their tone is light, a serious one.
“I don’t like things to be uneven.”
“I don’t like to be able to enjoy your company in bits and snippets four weeks out of the year, if I’m lucky, then spend the rest of the year knowing that half the time you’re on a damn ship and could talk to me, but won’t, out of some misguided principle.”
“Misguided? Wanting things to be fair and equal is misguided?”
“Your ideal of fairness is that what is mine can’t be made ours. That if you don’t have something, then I shouldn’t have it either. And you’re oblivious to the fact that what’s really valuable here isn’t the signal; it’s your company.”
“The signal costs credit. My company is free.”
“I can buy more signal. I can’t buy time with you, nor would I try. What is the point in what I have if I can’t share it? If it can’t make me happy?”
He looks genuinely sad now. I’ve never met a grown-up guy who was so free with his emotions. I’m glad we’re in the bubble now, because this conversation is making me uncomfortable. In here, I can barely hear them over the background noise. People crammed too tight are damn loud.
A man meets us just outside the gate. He nearly bows at Raj, then catches himself and they shake hands instead.
“Evans, thank you for seeing us at such short notice,” says Raj.
“Welcome! I contacted the school and have some girls ready. They are waiting for you now. I hope that’s ok.”
“It’s very kind of you,” says Alya.
“Not at all, not at all! It is a wonderful opportunity you are giving them. Would you like some tea before we start?”
Alya looks at Raj. “Maybe later? I don’t like to keep the girls waiting.”
“They will wait as long as you need them to,” says the man.
“Sure. I just don’t like to make them.”
He looks puzzled, but leads us on into a nearby building.
Twelve girls are waiting for us in a large room. They’re all gorgeous, all dressed in long-flowing robes in brilliant colors. They would look dazzling if they weren’t so obviously frightened. I see Tom starting to swell up out of the corner of my eye, so I elbow him in the ribs. He frowns at me, but he cuts it out.
Evans turns to Alya. “What do you want to see first? Their dancing?”
“Yes, if possible. Just for a few minutes. Then I’d like to talk to them one-to-one.”
“Sure. I’ll put some music on.”
When the song starts, I recognize it immediately. “Hey, that’s from that threedee you showed us.”
Raj whips around to look at Alya. “You’ve been watching musicals? You’ve always refused to get near them.”
She reddens. “Once or twice? Maybe? They’re not too painful once you get used to the awful story lines and terrible acting and ludicrous over-the-topness of it all.”
He beams. “Nonsense. You like them. You do, or you would not be watching them. And this is less than six months old, so it’s not even one of the ones I tried to inflict upon you. I am so pleased. So pleased.”
“Ha. You’re not paying attention. The kid wasn’t guessing. He heard the tune once and recognized it in what, two seconds?”
“Could have been a coincidence.”
“Wasn’t. As far as I can tell, he’s got perfect pitch, rhythm, and tempo. He hears a song once and he knows it. And he remembers the whole orchestration, not just the melody. You need to talk to him. He’ll make you so jealous you’ll probably cry. I have to work, anyway. Shoo!”
We go and stand in a corner, out of the way. I have to drag Tom to make him move. He’s quite keen on the dancing girls.
Raj hardly looks at them. He seems torn between talking to me and staring at Alya. I’m glad. I don’t really like to be quizzed by strangers.
“So you’re into music?”
“Not really. I mean, I like it, but I haven’t heard a lot of it.”
“What kind of music do you know?”
“What do you mean, know?”
“Which songs do you remember?”
I don’t understand what he’s on about. “All of them. The ones I’ve heard.”
He turns to stare at me then, Alya temporarily forgotten. “What? Really?”
“I think so. Is that weird?”
“I don’t know about weird, but it’s pretty cool, if you ask me. I have to work at learning tunes.”
“Oh. I didn’t know that was a thing.”
“Do you play anything?”
“What do you mean?”
“Any instrument. Musical instrument.”
“Nah.” I guess it’s easier to tell him straight out than to field his questions one by one. “I haven’t been home much for years. My family wasn’t into that kind of stuff, anyway. The whole planet isn’t. Back home, if you can’t eat it, drink it, or fuck it, then it’s a waste of time.”
“Shit. I guess I just forget how good we have it here. Performing arts are a major part of our culture, so all our kids get to try out all kinds of things, theatre, dancing, and music in particular. The hardest thing for us can be to settle on one thing long enough to get really good at it. Though maybe that’s more of a problem for people like me.”
“Like you?”
“I have it better than most. My family is well-off. I haven’t earned anything I have, and I have no hope of ever deserving half of it. I find it weird that it doesn’t bother most people.”
“Why should it bother anyone?”
He shakes his head and murmurs, “You ask her. She’s the world expert on that.” He’s staring at Alya again. The girls have stopped dancing, and she’s pulling them aside one by one to talk to them.
Tom elbows me. “Which ones do you like?”
“Which what?”
“Girls! Gods! Where’s your head at?”
“I don’t know. They all look nice. Wiggly and stuff. Does it matter?”
Tom looks frustrated. “They’ll be coming with the circus. This is important.”
“Is it?”
“Yes! Who else are you going to date, moving around every week?”
“Your friend is right,” says Raj. “It’s a great life, but it’s hard, too. Hard to keep people close, unless they come on show with you. Or you quit.”
“But we’ll get to meet people everywhere we go, won’t we?”
“Not always. Depends on how busy you are, I guess, and how the locals treat performers and travelers. Here you’re practically worshipped. But I really only got to know Alya because of Uncle Kolya, and I only got to know him because of the horses. My brothers and I, we were all into horses as children, but we’d only seen them in the threedees. Jameson wanted to be in dad’s good graces, so he let us go and have a play. Once I met Uncle Kolya, he couldn’t get rid of me. I can’t wait to see him. A year away is too long, and every year I don’t know whether he’s still on show, or he’s seen sense. I’d hope he’d tell me, but he’s terrible on the com, too. He’s as stubborn as she is.”
Alya’s finished with the girls and is walking towards us. When she reaches us, she looks up at Raj and smiles sweetly. “You do realize I can lip read, right?”
Raj blanches. “That’s a lie! Isn’t it?”
“Ha. It wouldn’t have mattered a fig if you hadn’t been talking about me. You’re so busted.” She rubs her forehead. “Gods, this is hard. I can never tell if they really want to come, or if the even know what they’re getting themselves into.”
Raj kneads her shoulder. “They probably don’t, but they know what they’re leaving.”
“I never know whether to pick the ones I like the most or the least. It’s no life for a girl, touring with us.”
We all stare at her.
“What?”
Raj giggles. “You’re a girl. Were you not aware? And you love it.”
She frowns. “It’s different for me.”
“Why?”
“Because… Because of reasons, that’s why. Stop being right, for once. Who the hell do I pick?”
“The prettiest,” says Tom.
“The best dancers?” say I.
Raj shrugs. “You’ve already picked. You picked the ones who need this the most, and it's only partly because they’ll cope the best. You're doing the right thing. You just don’t like to think about that.”
“Gods, Raj,” she looks stricken. “Way to make this harder.”
“It can’t get any harder. But I promise you, if these girls have any problems I will come and fetch them back myself. I am the school’s patron. Just because it’s an honorific it doesn’t mean I don’t take it seriously. You’ll be ok, and so will they. Get on with it.”
She pulls a face, but still she goes back to talk to the girls.
“What’s her problem?” asks Tom.
“She doesn’t like the idea of potentially wrecking someone’s life. She doesn’t like the responsibility.”
“She wasn’t so worried about signing us up.”
“Maybe your lives were already wrecked.”
Sometimes when Tom tries to act tough he ends up looking about twelve years old, and frightened. This is one of those times.
“We were doing ok. And we could have done something else.”
Raj looks horrified. “Yes. Of course. I wasn’t really thinking. I didn’t mean to offend you. Are you finding it nice?”
“It’s alright,” Tom shrugs. He’s clearly not in the mood to make nice, so I try to fix this.
“It’s only been a few days, but the work is alright. Being on ship so long might get boring, though.”
Raj jumps on the change of topic with a grateful smile. “I used to hate been on ship when I was younger. It felt like time that was sucked out of my life.”
“Well, we’re still working on ship, so it’s not so bad. We just need something to do with our time off.”
“Shit!” Raj shakes his head. “I’m just oblivious, am I not? I keep forgetting about how normal life works. Please don’t tell Alya. She already thinks I’m clueless.”
Tom smirks, but I feel sorry for the guy. “I don’t think she does. I mean, I don’t know her very well, but I don’t think she’d have much patience for that kind of thing. Or anything else, really.”
